Being Better
by Oracleismyname
Summary: What if Rachel had gone back to Quinn's house with her to collect that bridesmaid's dress and they were both hurt in the crash? What if Quinn hadn't recovered from her injuries and had to face spending the rest of her life in a wheelchair? AU after S3 Episode On My Way
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I own nothing other than a few original characters, most of whom will appear in later chapters. Fox own all the rest.

Prologue

"Rachel hurry, we're going to be late!" Quinn urged the shorter girl to get a move on. Rachel was in the girl's bathroom having a minor meltdown. Her mascara had run after Quinn had said some really nice things to her. "Why don't you go ahead with Finn. I'll go get the dress by myself and meet you there."

Glee Club had returned from Regionals with a win and Sue Sylvester had just restored Quinn to the Cheerio's because of her perseverance through the trauma of the previous two years. Quinn was thrilled. Glee Club was going to Nationals in Chicago, she was going to graduate with a 4.0 GPS, she was going to Yale and finally she was back in a cheerleading uniform. Being a better person really was working out for her.

"No I want to come with you and make sure you don't change your mind again." She ran out and linked arms with her Cheerleading friend. "Thank you for changing your mind. It means everything to me."

They practically ran out to Quinn's little red car and jumped in. Rachel talked incessantly the whole way. Quinn enjoyed the chatter; it always helped to make time go quicker and she found it more endearing than annoying these days. She had to run in and get the bridesmaid dress, relief coursing through her briefly. It wasn't Rachel being annoying that she needed a break from, but having to sit next to the brunette and pretend that she didn't love her and was happy about the impending marriage.

Rachel would never know how Quinn really felt about her because Quinn didn't deserve happiness after the way she had treated the pint-sized starlet in the past. So she would, for the first time in her life, put someone else's hopes and dreams before her own and try to move on. She was going to Yale and there were plenty more fish in the sea and if Quinn continued on this road of being a better person, maybe in the future she would deserve someone like Rachel. She lived in hope.

As they headed for the courthouse, Rachel kept getting texts from Finn. Quinn kept peering across to look at them. She turned back and had to brake sharply as there was a tractor in front. She had to ease off the accelerator until they got past it.

"Someone's not on our side today," Quinn muttered in frustration.

"Don't say that," Rachel looked across at her and put her hand on top of Quinn's briefly. Quinn looked across and apologized.

"I didn't mean anything by that, just this dumb tractor. I can't overtake around the bends."

"We'll get there." Rachel turned back to her phone as another text came through from Finn.

"WHERE R U?" It read. Quinn looked over to see what Rachel was typing back.

"ON OUR WAY," she replied.

Neither Quinn nor Rachel saw any of what happened with the truck that ploughed straight through a stop sign and into the Beetle. The brakes had failed on the truck and it T-boned the driver's side of the small red car. Quinn took the worst of the impact as the car slid across the highway and when the highway ran out, into the ditch at the side of the road.

Rachel screamed briefly as she hit the side of the car. Tiny fragments of glass blew right across from Quinn's window and struck the left side of her body, fortunately her face was turned away and it was mostly her arm that it struck. Quinn likewise didn't get glass in her face, but her body lurched sideways with the impact and was thrown around further as they rolled. When the car came to a stop it was back on its wheels having done a '360' twice. Dust settled and silence fell on the scene.

Chapter 1

There was a steady beep from the machines, reassuring everyone that they were both still alive.

Rachel's left arm lay bandaged, her right leg was in a cast to the knee and her neck was in a stiff neck brace. She had a myriad of tiny nicks in the skin on her neck and chest. She was breathing on her own, but her head had struck the passenger window and she had been knocked unconscious. There was some worry about a head injury, but when she was scanned, it revealed no damage to her brain, only some swelling on the exterior of her skull which wasn't that serious. The medics were hopeful she would start to come around within a short time period. There was a worrying injury though. Her spine was compressed and that meant she might have impaired sensation and movement in her lower body, though thankfully the MRI showed no damage to the spinal cord. Doctors mumbled about waiting to see what the damage was before a definitive diagnosis could be given.

Quinn's injuries were much worse. Her left side was bruised from head to toe. She had taken a lot of the glass impact on her exposed left shoulder, left thigh and the side of her neck; she was covered in white butterfly strips to close the tiny nicks. She had a closed head injury and the medics didn't know when she would wake up. They were giving her heavy doses of medication to keep her brain from bleeding. She also had on a hard neck brace, but in addition she now had a body brace on as well to protect her spine which had fractured in two places just above her hips. The doctors were talking to Judy Fabray at the moment, telling her that Quinn had suffered a spinal cord injury.

The whole of the Glee club waited outside for news, only family had gone in so far, plus Finn of course; he was Rachel's fiancé after all.

It was eight hours after the crash by the time Rachel started to stir. A relieved looking Finn came out to tell them she was waking up, but was so doped she didn't really know what was happening. They were all relieved to know but hung on for more news, hoping that Quinn too would wake up soon, but they were disappointed and one by one, as parents insisted their children return home, they drifted away not knowing Quinn's fate.

Finn kept a vigil outside intensive care with Rachel's dad's and Quinn's mom. The next days were a blur for all of them.

Rachel didn't remember the first four days after the accident, even though she had been conscious at times. She hadn't been able to comprehend the things they had said to her with any clarity, but had been comfortable in her daze. Now she was uncomfortable and had started to remember. Her first thoughts were for Quinn.

"Is she okay?" Finn had squeezed her hand and shook his head.

Panic flashed through Rachel's features. "Is she …?"

"No, but she's in intensive care, Rach. She has a head injury and has only just come round. The doctor's say she has a spinal injury as well. They're going to operate on her tomorrow." He brushed back the hair hanging over her eyes, there was still a little blood round the left edge of her ear that he'd missed and looked around for the wet wipes to clean it off.

"Have you seen her yet?"

"No only family is allowed at the moment."

Rachel's back was in agony and her legs felt like they had permanent pins and needles. The doctors said this was good, but she couldn't move them and was panicking. She had pain written across her face, but a determined look to get the answers she wanted from her fiancé.

"I need to see her."

Rachel had to wait three more days before she was allowed to move and Quinn was allowed more visitors. By this time the pins and needles were almost gone and she could feel her legs but couldn't move them. She was frustrated by this; the doctors said she would have to use a wheelchair for a few weeks, but that she should eventually make a full recovery. It would take some physical therapy, especially as she had a broken fibula as well, but she would be back on her feet well before graduation.

Finn wheeled Rachel into Quinn's room. It had taken almost a week for Quinn to wake up, but she was finally coming around. When Rachel took Quinn's right hand in hers and squeezed it, she felt Quinn reciprocate.

"Quinn, can you hear me?" Rachel's voice was almost childlike. She took in the pale form of the cheerleader, lying stretched out. She could see the IV lines, neck brace and body brace; a white plastic vest strapped to Quinn's torso with broad Velcro straps. She recognized the catheter tube running from under the sheet to the large collection bag steadily filling with urine fastened to the side of the bed. Hers had been removed two days ago. Her lower body was covered by the sheet.

"Mom?" she heard from Quinn's mouth.

"No Quinn. It's Rachel and Finn." Eyes flew open and strained to see her, but sat down she was out of view.

"Rachel?"

"Quinn, I'm so glad you're still alive." Tears ran down Rachel's cheeks. "I have been so worried that you wouldn't wake up." Rachel's small hand threaded in between the rail at the side of the bed and took Quinn's hand in hers.

"Hey," Finn peered over so Quinn could see him. When their eyes met, his crinkled into a smile, but hers just started weeping.

"I'm so sorry, Finn. The wedding … It's my fault."

"Sssh Quinn. The truck that hit you failed to stop, the brakes failed. It's okay, Rachel's going to be okay. We're just glad you're still alive."

Rachel was upset that she and Quinn couldn't make eye contact. "How are you feeling?" She asked, hardly daring to hear the answer.

"Did they tell you about my legs?" Quinn's voice sounded haunted.

Rachel squeezed her hand again. "Your mom told us you have a spinal injury."

"I'm paralyzed from my hips down. I can't feel anything Rachel. It's like they aren't even there." Her voice cracked and she couldn't say another word.

"Hey, don't get upset," Finn tried to calm her down. He put his hand on her uninjured shoulder and rubbed it gently. "Everything's gonna work out. I'm sure you'll get better. You just need to be patient and everyone's praying for you."

"Everyone?"

"Yeah, the whole school is upset at what happened."

Quinn looked horrified. "Everyone knows?"

"Just that you were badly hurt and in the hospital. We haven't been in school either so I don't know what your Mom has told Principal Figgins. But don't worry about it. Everyone will just be glad that you've woken up and have been talking normally. They said you had a head injury and we were worried you might not be yourself afterwards."

She grimaced in pain as she tried to look at Rachel again but failed. "Rach, you sure you're okay?"

"I just have a few scrapes and hurt my leg and back a bit, but I'm going to be good as new in a few weeks, Quinn. You don't need to worry about me at all. Promise me you'll just concentrate on getting better." The singer's small hand squeezed Quinn's again.

"Okay, I promise. Finn?" She looked for him as he had moved out of her line of sight. "Can you tell Santana I want to see her? And Mercedes."

"Sure, I'll send them a text right now, whatever you need Quinn, just ask." He moved back and gave her a kiss on her forehead.

"Thanks," she appreciated the kindness he showed her and her eyes drifted closed again, squeezing out tears of both physical and emotional discomfort. Rachel pulled out a tissue and gave it to Finn to wipe Quinn's tears away.

Rachel was in pain and as much as she wanted to stay, she knew she couldn't sit up for much longer. "I'll come by again later, okay Quinn."

"I'm not leaving anytime soon," she made a half-hearted attempt at a joke.

Finn could see Rachel was struggling with the pain and rushed her back to her own room. He lifted her on the bed so she could rest, but Rachel was crying freely now. It wasn't fair that she and Quinn had gotten close only for this to happen.

"I feel terrible, she was driving me to our wedding and now…" she couldn't even finish the sentence.

"Rach, please don't get upset. I can't bear to see you so devastated. Be thankful that you are both alive."

"But what if she is permanently paralyzed, Finn? I don't know if I could cope to see her like that. It would destroy her, especially after she just got her Cheerios uniform back. She didn't even get it back for a day!"

"Rachel please, it won't be so bad. We'll all help her and look at Artie, he's okay. She will be as well."

"Quinn is not Artie," Rachel countered. "She's supposed to be going to Yale."

It was quieter than it had been the first night when everyone was there and wailing into their hankies. Santana sat outside the room taking a deep breath. She felt sick. Brit squeezed her hand. "I can't believe this, Brit."

For once her girlfriend had nothing insightful to say. "Go in and see her. I'll wait here for now."

Santana gave Brittany a kiss and stood. She tapped on the door and went in. Judy looked pleased to see her and gave her a hug, but Santana's eyes remained fixed on her best friend who was lying motionless on the bed. Judy left briefly saying she was going to get coffee and talk to the nurse, but Santana knew she was just giving them some space.

"Hey," she leaned over Quinn, wanting to touch her but realizing pretty much everything looked wrecked.

"San," Quinn tried a smile, though it seemed forced.

"You did a number on yourself girl."

"Come round the other side," Quinn wanted Santana to hold her hand and the left was too sore from where it had been wrenched from the steering wheel.

Santana took in the covered up bits and wondered if her friend could even feel the sheet over her lower half. Rachel had warned her about the body brace, but even so it was a shock to see it for real.

Santana took hold of Quinn's good hand with one of her own and stroked her friend's arm with the other.

"The lengths you'll go to prevent the dwarf from marrying doughface."

"What?" Quinn thought Santana was being serious for a moment." "No, I wouldn't. I could never hurt Rachel again, not after what I did to her in the past. Please don't call her names."

They were interrupted by a nurse who came in and checked over the IV. "Sorry to disturb your visit, but I need to take your pressure Quinn." She hooked up the machine, tentatively wrapping it around the uninjured part of her left arm. When she had done, she lifted the side of the sheet revealing Quinn's legs. They were covered with white pressure stockings. The nurse peeled them down and checked the legs carefully. The left had more butterfly strips on the thigh and this was where the nurse spent most of her time checking for signs of infection. Santana could see that the legs were completely limp and unresponsive. A sickening sensation built in her stomach. "Quinn, your legs are cold so I'm going to put the blood pressure cuffs on for a while."

"What's that for?" Santana asked the nurse.

"Because of the injury to her spinal cord, her legs aren't able to feel temperature and her leg muscles aren't working, so blood isn't circulating as fast. The legs are a long way from the heart, so they cool down quicker than normal. It will be better once she's out of bed and moving around." She gave Santana a warm smile.

"Can I do anything to help?" She asked.

"Can you plug this into the socket on the wall?" the nurse handed her the end of an electric cable which she plugged in as asked. The nurse folded back the sheet from both feet and slipped on a pair of weird looking boots with tubes sticking out and to which the cable was attached. It took a couple of minutes to get them on, but then she took a control pad, checked the settings and switched it on. There was a funny noise coming from them and Santana gave her a curious look. "The cuffs have small airbags inside that inflate and deflate, sort of like having a massage. It helps to push the blood back up to the heart quicker."

"Oh, okay." She turned back to look at Quinn who had tears in her eyes even though she hadn't felt any of it. "Why are you crying?" Santana asked.

"It's embarrassing. I can't even feel it and it's still mortifying. The therapist comes in and moves them around a few times a day and each time it makes me feel ill just thinking about it." More tears flowed.

Santana tried to cheer her up the only way she knew how, treating her normally. "Yeah but you got those sexy looking white stockings, they kinda remind me of what Berry wears."

"I told you already, stop making fun of her. She's hurt too, you know. I almost got her killed. I would never have forgiven myself if she had. I ruined her wedding day and almost ruined her life again. Why can't I get anything right when it comes to Rachel?"

Santana was a little taken aback. She was thoughtful for a moment, then suddenly it hit her. "Oh God. You are in big trouble. You like her!" Santana's mind was reeling. "That's why you asked me about the picture in my locker that she gave me. You're gay for Berry."

"What? No. I was just surprised because you always seemed to hate her and then suddenly you started being nice to her."

"That's because when I got outed by Finnocence, she was completely non-judgmental." Santana paused while her brain made the connections. "Exactly how she treated you when you got pregnant. Is that when this started?"

Quinn gasped. How the hell had Santana figured this out from nothing. Tears ran from her eyes. "You can't tell her. Promise me you won't say anything to her. I don't deserve to be happy, San, but she does and I think finding out might make her unhappy and drive her away. She loves Finn."

"Cool your tits, Fabray. I might be a bitch, but usually only when it's deserved. I gots to say though, I'm worried about you."

"Don't be. I'm not worth worrying about. That's why I wanted to see you. I can't stand the thought of everyone knowing and coming in here feeling sorry for me. It was bad enough when I was pregnant; all the stares and whispers behind my back. What will it be like now I'm broken? Ten times worse and it's too much. I don't want anyone seeing me like this so you have to keep them all away, except Mercedes."

"Hey, stop it. I know it was harsh when you were knocked up, but this is different. Everyone is on your side and you need them to help you through this. I don't think even I could keep them all away. I promise not to say anything to Rach though. Brit's outside, she wants to see you, can I go get her?"

Quinn gave in. She was tired of fighting against everything. "Sure," her eyes fluttered as pain ran through her head. "But not for long, I'm really tired."


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I own nothing

Chapter 2

Figgins sat in his office, his fingers steepled, eying Will Schuester who had tears in his eyes. Emma sat beside him holding one hand and on the opposite side Sue was holding the other.

"We need to be particularly sensitive about the Glee Club, they will take this harder than the Cheerio's. I want Emma in Glee practice after school all this week in case any of them get upset and need to talk straight away.

"I was going to cancel Glee so they can all go to the hospital instead." Will's voice was hoarse.

"I don't think you should," Emma advised. "I think they need to talk about it with each other."

"As much as I would have loved to see the back of your Glee club in the past, I can't help but agree with Barbara Gordon here in this situation." Sue as diplomatic as ever. "Quinn Fabray, despite her misdemeanors is still just about the most popular girl in the history of McKinley."

"I'll go talk to them now," Will stood. "I just don't know how to make them feel any better about this."

"I don't think any of us know how to do that William." Sue showed a rare moment of sincerity. "Tell them just to be thankful that they are both still alive."

Will looked in from the doorway, afraid to go any further into the room, but he felt the gentle guidance of Emma's arm sliding in beside his and leading him forwards.

"Mr Schue?" Mercedes looked up with tears in her eyes and questions written across her face.

"Hey guys," his voice cracked a little as he looked around the room. As well as the injured girls, Finn, Brittany and Santana were all missing. The rest were looking at him expecting him to give them good news, but his heart was breaking at what he had to tell them.

"Is there any more news?" Artie looked at him. He really wished it hadn't been Artie of all people.

Emma squeezed his hand and sat beside him.

"Yes, I er.. we just heard from Quinn's Mom."

"Please tell me they're going to be okay," Mercedes had Sam's hand firmly in hers.

"What I can tell you so far is that Rachel is out of bed and able to get around in a wheelchair a little, her spine was compressed so she's having difficulty moving her legs but it's only temporary. You can go and visit her after school now if you like. It looks like she's going to need a few weeks to get better, but she'll be back on her feet soon enough."

"Thank God," Sam and Mercedes both uttered.

"What about Quinn, Mr Schue?" Artie sensed there was some bad news; Miss Pilsbury looked like she had been crying.

"Well, she's conscious now and she can have visitors, but only two at a time and for a few minutes at a time. Her injuries were much more severe and she is still on a lot of medication for the time being." Will steeled himself for the bombshell he was about to drop on them. "The doctors have told Quinn that she has a serious spinal cord injury." He heard Artie take a sharp breath in. "I'm sorry to have to say this to you all, but Quinn is paralyzed from her waist down and though not a hundred per cent certain, the doctors think that her injury is permanent." Will could no longer contain his tears and they ran freely down his cheeks.

"No!" Artie slammed his fists down on the armrest of his chair. "Dammit, this isn't right!" he raged at the news, more so than the rest of them, who just looked incredibly sad.

Rachel was told she would probably be in the hospital for another two weeks before they would let her go home. She went to see Quinn every day to sit with her for a while; she was good at small-talk and Quinn seemed to like it; she said it relieved the boredom. Rachel was able to sit for longer each time and push herself around, so she didn't have to wait for anyone else to be there either.

With Quinn's mom back at work during the day, the blonde girl started to get very bored with lying still and only Rachel's visits seemed to break the monotony of hospital routine. Rachel had gotten in the habit of just wandering down the corridor when she felt like it, because for Quinn each day had been the same so far. Dressings and IVs changed, bag emptied, get turned on one side, then two hours later, get turned onto the other side. It was relentless. Visitors came and went, two at a time, bringing gifts and balloons, soft toys, fruit and candy, but none of it really made her feel better. Santana brought her some thick socks to keep her feet warm and collected books and an iPod from her locker at school so she could have something to read and listen to. Everyone in Glee Club had grouped funds together to buy her a new phone, hers got smashed to pieces in the wreck, they even put all their numbers in for her and sent her texts on a regular basis. Her Mom brought clothes from home so they could get her out of the hospital gown and into something more dignified. Because she had healed pretty well, the visitors no longer had to wear masks and gowns at least like they had the first couple of weeks. Still, it was hard to be cheerful when someone had to feed, dress and toilet you.

Rachel came in one morning though to find things had changed. Quinn's bed was raised at about forty-five degrees and the neck brace was finally gone.

"Hey, you're sitting up!" Rachel was happy to see some progress. She noted that Quinn was wearing a T-shirt and baggy shorts instead of a gown. There was a urine collection bag tied to her lower leg instead of the bed and the IV lines were gone, though there was still a port taped to the back of her left hand so they could administer meds. Still it was good to see her less 'tied down' with tubes and wires than before.

"Not exactly sitting, but it's better than lying flat. And I get to feed myself at last." Quinn took in Rachel's condition, seeing her properly for the first time since the crash. She glanced at her friends face and saw no blemishes, for that she was relieved in the extreme. Her left arm had a number of tiny scabs covering it and Quinn looked pained when she saw it. She moved lower, seeing the cast on Rachel's right lower leg and of course the hospital wheelchair she was sat in. She knew Rachel had a bad back and that her legs were barely functioning but seeing her in the wheelchair for the first time drew tears.

"What's matter?"

"I'm so sorry, this is all my fault. Look at your arm and your leg."

"Quinn, don't please. I'm going to be fine. The doctor said the wounds on my arm are so tiny that they'll be invisible in a few months and my leg will heal in a few weeks. Stop crying, please. It was an accident and definitely not your fault. It's you we're all worried about."

"Don't be, I'm not worth it." She closed her eyes, leaning her head back into the comfort of the pillows behind her head.

"Quinn Fabray, you have never been more wrong. You are beautiful, funny, smart and really strong. You are going to get through this and come out the other side better than ever."

"How can you say that after all the things I said and did to you?"

"You will remember I forgave you for that quite some time ago, unless your memory was impaired from the head trauma."

"I know you did, but I still feel guilty about what a bitch I was to you especially," Quinn sighed despairingly. "I guess I got what I deserved for doing all that now," she said softly, her neck was stiff and her headache had returned.

Rachel wheeled close to the bed and took Quinn's arm. "Please don't say that. No one deserves this to happen to them."

"Maybe this is God's way of making me understand that I need to be a better person."

"I don't know if it's part of God's plan, but you are a good person and you didn't do anything wrong here, I promise you. We'll all help you get better, Quinn. Everyone in Glee is praying for you, well except Kurt, but I know he is thinking about you nonetheless." Rachel didn't give up, but Quinn's depression was sinking deeper. She wracked her brain as to what to do, but could only think of one thing that might shake her out of it. Call Artie.

Artie had been avoiding going to see Quinn. He was kind of a geek, she was a year older and about the most beautiful creature on the planet. He guessed he was the last person she would want to see considering she was likely to be in the same position for the foreseeable future.

But Rachel had called and asked him to visit and it was almost impossible to say no to her these days.

When he knocked on the door, there was no reply so he hesitated, wondering if Quinn was asleep. He knocked again. "It's open," a grouchy sounding voice replied from within.

Artie swallowed and went in. She was propped up in the bed, sitting but with pillows under her knees. He knew they did that to take the pressure off her spine. Quinn's eyes snapped immediately to his chair, not to him, he noticed.

"I know I'm probably the last person you want to see, so I can go if you want. Rachel asked me to come and talk to you. She thinks you're depressed. I didn't need her to tell me that actually, I know you must be and me being in a chair is probably just a painful reminder of what's to come for you, so I can tell her I came, that should make her happy; I don't want to force myself on you if seeing me makes you feel sad."

Quinn closed her eyes briefly and Artie wondered if he should just go. She didn't look in the mood to talk and he knew from experience that everyone handled this sort of thing differently. He had only been eight. He hadn't experienced many of the things in life that older teenagers had, so he hadn't known what he was missing out on. It was probably really hard for her right now, especially as she had been through so much in the previous couple of years.

He made to turn, his wheels squeaking on the floor and it made Quinn open her eyes again.

"Don't go," she sighed. He had made the effort to come and see her. She considered that this couldn't be easy for him after his own experience. Personal growth, thinking about someone other than herself.

He turned back and rolled closer to her as she seemed to want to say something to him.

"They're bringing a …" her face clouded and tears threatened. She started again. "They're bringing _my_ wheelchair today." The tears started running and her chest heaved. It had been three and a half weeks and now that she could sit up, there was no point in delaying the inevitable.

Artie looked serious. "Of all the days I could have come," he sighed.

"No it's fine," she brushed the tears away. "I'm going to have to learn to deal with it. I'm sorry I was rude. It's just that … when you came in, I saw my future and I've been in denial up until now."

"I know it seems impossibly hard right now, but it gets easier," he said quietly. "At first it's really scary and you don't want to get in, but when you have tried it a few times, you get used to it, but the wheelchair isn't really the thing, you know."

"What do you mean?" She looked him in the eye for the first time.

"The hard thing is getting used to the way people treat you when you're in it."

"People like me you mean?" She thought about it for a second. "Or at least how I used to be when you were a freshman."

"Yeah, but the thing is you changed your mind about me and you have to ask yourself why that happened."

Quinn cast her mind back to what she had first thought about Artie when they met in Glee. "I thought you were a loser at first." She admitted that. "I was exceptionally arrogant at the time and you were kind of a dork and in a wheelchair to boot. I didn't understand that you were just normal underneath all that. Then when I got pregnant and started to stick out for all the wrong reasons, I realized that no one was seeing the normal me. Then when Mr Schue made us spend the week in a wheelchair, which wasn't so bad actually because we were all doing it, I realized that being different was okay. You made it easy to forget as well. I don't mean forget exactly but when you danced and sang, I could tell that you felt the same way I did. I understood we had more in common than I thought. You pretty much broke my heart when you sang 'Dream a Little Dream' though."

"Sorry about that; it was a rare moment of self-pity." He looked up at her. "Do you want people to treat you differently from now on? Do you want them to feel sorry for you and offer to help you out all the time?"

"No!" Quinn was emphatic about that at least.

"Then you're going to have to change how you think about yourself right now. If you sit in the chair and you're all miserable and feeling sorry for yourself, everyone will just pity you. If you want to be treated the same way you were before, you have to behave the same way."

"You mean be a total bitch on wheels? I don't want to be like that; I left that person behind months ago."

"No I mean, you need to be strong and hold your head high. You can't change your physical condition, but you can adopt an attitude that says don't dare treat me like I'm fragile or broken, treat me as an equal."

"But what if that's not how I feel?" Quinn's tone fell again.

"Fake it until you've got everyone convinced, even yourself."

Artie was a good sport. Quinn realized later that day just how amazing he was. He stuck around to reassure her, but even so, her first few minutes in the wheelchair were not pleasant. She found in hard to balance and hung onto the armrests so hard her knuckles went white. Each day, it got a little easier to sit and eventually she was able to keep her balance well enough to push the wheels herself. It was hard work as she started physical therapy and each day she spent less time in bed. Artie came to see her much more and was so helpful that her gratitude would last a lifetime. He understood everything and she could be honest with him, where she protected the rest of her friends about how she really felt. She finally took delivery of her custom made wheelchair four weeks after she had first sat in one. It looked very different, Artie was actually jealous when he saw the titanium frame and the carbon spoke wheels. She no longer needed armrests and just had little fenders by her hips to keep her clothes from being ruined by the rear wheels brushing against them.

Rachel had been released home at about the same time Quinn was allowed out of bed, but she was back each day for her own physical therapy. They were often in the gym together initially, but where Rachel was walking between parallel bars by the end of the second week, Quinn was practicing sliding from the wheelchair to the bench and learning to keep her balance. By the end of the fourth week, Rachel was walking with crutches, but Quinn was learning how to get from lying down to sitting up on her own.

The two had spoken each time before and after their sessions together, but during the sessions it was hard for Quinn. She could see Rachel recovering each day where she just learned how to manage her condition. She felt left behind. At least that motivated her to keep practicing as much as possible; she wanted to be back in school. Realizing time was running out, she doubled her efforts in everything.

Rachel had been back at school for a few weeks already. She had arrived back on crutches initially, but they had gone now. Although she was still limping a little because her right ankle was often sore, little evidence existed to remind everyone how close she had come to losing everything. Completing her rehab and going back to school created a little distance between Quinn and her. Artie knew more than he was letting on, that much Rachel knew, but she respected Quinn's privacy and didn't ask when she was coming back to school. Everyone knew she was still physically struggling from the constant, though less frequent visits.

"Artie, did you visit with Quinn this weekend?"

"Yeah, I saw her on Saturday."

"Did she seem okay?"

He nodded. "Why do you ask? Haven't you talked to her?"

"I finished my physical therapy last week and I had so much school work to catch up on, I couldn't visit this weekend. Plus she's not responding to my text messages."

"Well, I wouldn't worry about it. She's been working hard and is probably just tired."

Rachel nodded and returned to her discussion about song choices for Nationals with the others.

What Artie didn't tell them was that Quinn had left the hospital for the weekend and would soon be leaving for good, apart from her therapy appointments. He figured she would want to decide for herself how best to break it to everyone she would soon be back in school.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I still own nothing

Chapter 3

Nine weeks since the accident.

A week after Rachel had spoken to Artie about Quinn, she and Finn were talking at the lockers.

"So you think that if Quinn hadn't gotten into her accident we would have gone through with the wedding?"

"Totally, but I'm kind of glad we're waiting now so it doesn't have to be some Justice of the Peace quickie." He replied to her question.

"Maybe we can get married in Chicago right after Nationals, some place special, like Wrigley Field," he suggested, then watched Rachel's face fall as she looked down. "Or someplace else that's special." He tried to reassure her that it didn't need to be a sports stadium.

"It's not that, it's just that I can't stop thinking about Quinn and that she's now…"

"Right behind you," Finn pointed over her right shoulder.

Rachel was still agonizing about Quinn, which he understood, although not the guilt that seemed to be going along with it because it was the truck that was in the wrong, not them, and he was trying to explain this when he caught his first glimpse of Quinn in the wheelchair. His conversation stopped abruptly and Rachel following his gaze turned around. It wasn't such a shock to see her in the chair, because she had seen the blonde in rehab plenty of times, but this wasn't the same wheelchair and Quinn looked different now too.

Quinn rolled up with a big smile on her face, Artie was just behind her watching and making sure she was okay. The wheelchair was a bit like his, only cooler and it was immediately apparent that it was the type that would be a permanent fixture in the former cheerleader's life. Rachel was trying to keep her heart together because it was in danger of breaking at that moment.

"Quinn," Rachel gasped. "You're back."

"I am and surprisingly okay about it. Artie's been helping me out," she turned and gave him a grin.

"I .. I didn't know you were starting back so soon, if I'd known I would have …"

"Rachel, don't please. I wasn't sure I would make it past the front door and if I hadn't, it would just have been a disappointment to everyone if I told them today was the day. I don't want a big fuss okay. I could easily have become one of those creepy memorial pages in the yearbook and I only have a few of months of school left. I'm so far behind I didn't want to leave it any longer than I had to." Quinn felt a bit bad for stopping Rachel speaking, she looked so heartbroken when she turned around and saw her sitting in the chair, even now the bottom lip was quivering as though the brunette would burst into tears at any moment. "Sorry that I haven't replied to any of your messages, I just threw myself into rehab and blocked everything out so I had it done with as quick as possible. I'll be fine, just be patient with me. I'm glad to be back, even if it is in a wheelchair. Believe it or not, this is one of the happiest days of my life."

"So you're done with rehab?" Finn asked, impressed that she looked so good after what she had been through. She was dressed in typical Quinn style, skinny jeans and white top with a lemon cardigan over it. Her hair and makeup were flawless and she had a big smile across her face.

"No, but I can manage enough to get around on my own without much help now so they let me home." Her voice dropped a little as she added. "The changes to the house were done a few weeks ago, so I can manage there." Realizing she sounded a little sorry for herself she remembered what Artie said about faking it. Brightening her voice she added, "and of course thanks to Artie, school is fully accessible now," she shrugged, "so here I am."

Rachel dropped and squeezed her into a hug, almost taking her by surprise at how forceful it was. "I'm so glad you're back."

Quinn reciprocated the hug and reveled in being so close to the brunette. "I meant what I said, Rachel. I'm okay." Rachel eventually released her and nodded as she stood back up, tears in her eyes. "I'll see you guys later in Glee, okay. Come on Artie, I'll race you."

With that Quinn shoved the wheels and took off pretty quickly while Finn took hold of Rachel and gave her a big bear hug. She molded herself to his chest while she got to grips with her emotions. Finn always made her feel secure and that everything was going to be okay.

Santana had gotten a message from the hobbit that Quinn was back, but she was sat opposite Coach Sylvester getting a lecture about tightening up the routine they had been working on and when she saw Santana sneak a glance at her phone she went ape.

"Unless that happens to be a message from the president, you had better put that phone away, Sandbags."

"Coach, I'm sorry, but it's a message from Rachel Berry, they scare me more than you these days. Q's back."

The last thing Quinn had expected on her first day had been a message to report to Sue Sylvester's office. She tapped on the door, but didn't get any further as Santana jumped out of her seat and ran to her. They shared a hug and even though Sue didn't look happy, she didn't say anything.

"Get your butt out of my office, Boobs Magee and sort out that pyramid before I get to practice this afternoon."

"Yes Coach," she replied and turning back to Quinn said quietly, "I'll wait for you outside."

"Well, well. Quinn Fabray. It's not often I am sincere in my praise, but you're a sight for sore eyes."

Slightly taken aback by what appeared to be a genuine compliment, Quinn rolled further inside the office. Sue moved from behind the desk and sat on the front to face her. "Thanks, Coach." In the spirit of fresh starts and faking it. "I'm sorry about the uniform. I would have returned it, but they had to cut if off in the hospital and I doubt the bloodstains would have come out in the wash anyway."

Sue looked at the Quinn Fabray in front of her and though she was trying not to, the emotion got to her. The girl hadn't been the best cheerleader in the world but she would have killed her own granny to get to the top of the pyramid in the past and Sue liked that about her. She had been manipulative and conniving, both admirable traits when you wanted to win a national championships, but this Quinn Fabray wasn't the same girl she had been back then; she had changed and for that Sue admired her even more. She reached down and gave her a huge hug.

"Q, there was a time when you reminded me of a young Sue Sylvester, beautiful, talented but somehow a little less evil and I admire that. Now Becky Jackson notwithstanding, I was worried that the Cheerio's might become a laughing stock with two handicapable members of the team, but apparently not, so I have a new uniform here for you if you want it, Fabray. Of course I'm not suggesting we try to haul you up the top of the stack in the wheelchair but I'm sure Artie Abrahams can teach you a few moves we can incorporate into the routine." Sue handed the box to Quinn, who took it and opened it up. Neatly folded inside was the familiar red, white and black uniform she had so desperately wanted to wear again.

Quinn almost choked. "Thanks, Coach. I appreciate the offer, but I think my cheerleading days are over. Not that I'm ungrateful for your offer, but I only have a few months of school left and I think I just want to catch up on the work I missed and enjoy what's left of my senior year. Besides I don't think anyone's ready to see my useless legs in a Cheerio's skirt again, do you?" She made to hand the box back, but Sue refused it.

"I understand you might not want to perform again, but at least keep the uniform. If nothing else, it replaces the one you lost and you deserve something to remind you of how good you were. You'll be an honorary member of the team until the day you graduate." Sue couldn't take much more, she needed something to punch or throw around before she broke down.

"Coach, are you alright?" Quinn was a little stunned. She knew most of her friends would be upset, but even Sue Sylvester was getting all emotional.

"I'm fine, Q. It's just the baby hormones. Now get the hell out of my office, I have a National Championship to plan for and if you're not going to help me, you might as well get back to that bunch of losers in Glee Club." Sue hardened until Quinn had exited the room and then she let the tears come.

When Quinn left the office, she found Santana sitting on the floor outside, back against the wall, knees pulled up under her chin. "Why didn't you tell me you would be back today?" She huffed, not bothering to stand up.

"I didn't know I was actually going to make it through the front door without turning around and going straight back home. I lost enough face around here when I was pregnant and I was worried that if I let everyone know today was the day and then bottled it at the last moment, I would lose even more."

"I guess you have lost more than most," Santana still didn't move. Quinn turned her chair so her back was also to the wall. Neither of them dared make eye contact. "So how are you coping with the wheels?"

"Better than I am with the bathroom," Quinn returned, then apologizing for being a little sarcastic, added, "sorry, you don't need to know that."

"Maybe I do. I feel bad that I haven't been there enough for you."

"Don't be, I wouldn't have let you anyway. I can't disguise my feelings and fool you like I can with everyone else."

"So you're just pretending to be okay with this?"

"Not entirely, San. It's tough, but I genuinely don't want anyone's pity, so Artie told me I had to be confident and positive or fake it until I believed it myself. So far it's working."

"I don't think you can be really happy until you confess how you really feel to the …" Santana stopped herself, "to Rachel." She really had to kick that habit now she and Rachel were friends.

"You promised me you wouldn't say anything!"

"And I haven't. I won't. Ever. But I think you ought to."

"I can't, not now."

"Why? Are you afraid you'll get judged even more?"

"No. I'm just not good enough for her and I never will be."

Quinn moved forwards and Santana stood eyeing her carefully. "I think you're wrong but I respect that it's your call. Can I give you a push to class?"

"I can manage thanks, besides I need to put this in my locker," Quinn looked at the box on her knees.

"Is that a Cheerios uniform?"

"Yeah, Sue wanted me back on the squad. Don't panic, I said no."

The dark eyes looked up and tried to read the placid features of her pale friend. "I understand."

"Catch up with you later okay?" Quinn rolled off towards her locker down the hallway.

Santana watched as Quinn moved away and hung her head sadly. It was going to be torture watching Quinn go through this next few months in love, but not be able to say it out loud.

The members of Glee club already knew Quinn was back, but she had kept out of everyone's way for much of the day. She had spent lunchtime in the library catching up and had spent most of recess in the bathroom, trying to deal with her 'plumbing' as she referred to it.

So when Artie led an animated Quinn into the choir room, both singing 'I'm still standing' at the top of their lungs, the rest of the choir room were slack jawed to begin with and more than a little taken aback with their friend, who they had expected to look more than a little sorry for herself.

They sat rooted to their chairs, each looking at Quinn then at one another to gage the reactions of someone else. Mr Schue looked relieved, then pleased to see Quinn's first attempt at dancing in her chair. It was impressive considering the accident had been only nine weeks before, but even he looked like he didn't know what to do when the song came to an end.

Quinn already knew what she was going to do though, she was going to talk to them all, set them straight about how she wanted to be treated and clear the air so they could get on with winning at Nationals, even if it was without her.

Artie rolled away to sit facing her with everyone else at the end of the song and waited expectantly for what she would say.

"I apologize for the song choice, it was Artie's idea and I couldn't resist. I apologize for not telling you all that I was going to be back in school today but I didn't want a fuss, as I'm sure you can imagine. I think I have created enough gossip already around here before now without adding this to the list." She pointed down at her wheelchair. "Just to set the record straight, I wanted to talk to everyone together so you would know where I stand, or sit, I should say," there was a small ripple of laughter around the room at her little joke and some reassuring smiles, especially from Santana and Artie. "The accident wasn't my fault, but I felt responsible for ruining Rachel's wedding because if I had been more supportive of it in the first place, I wouldn't have had to drive home to get my dress and Rachel wouldn't have felt the need to accompany me in case I changed my mind again. That said, it was an accident and I wish things had turned out differently and no one had been hurt, but I'm _really_ glad that you're okay, Rach. If our places were reversed, or worse, I don't think I could live with myself."

Rachel moved as if she was going to run to her, but Quinn stopped her. "Please don't Rachel." She put her hand up to signal she wanted to continue uninterrupted.

"So anyway, the docs say that I'm pretty much going to have to get used to the chair from now on. I ..." she paused and remembered what Artie said. Swallowing, she inhaled deeply and then just let the words come out. "I am paralyzed from my hips down and by that I mean I can't feel or move my legs at all, so although I might be rolling around the halls and managing most things quite well, I'm not really as mobile as Artie, nor are my dance moves anywhere near as smooth yet." She gave him a grin.

"They soon will be," he replied, returning the smile.

"For that reason, I'd like to still be in Glee until we graduate but I don't want to spoil our chances of winning, so I won't be going to Nationals with you."

There was a silence at that. Stunned, Rachel started shaking her head. "No Quinn, you have to be there, after everything we've been through. We're a team." Coming from Berry, that was saying something. The Diva wasn't usually ready to share the spotlight.

But it was Mr Schue who stood up and moved towards her. He put his hand on her shoulder. "I think I speak for everyone here Quinn, when I say that unless you go, none of us will be taking part."

"But Mr Schue, really, I will only be in the way and I'm not even that good of a singer, not compared to Rachel, Mercedes or Santana. I'd rather just watch you perform. I can't move around like Artie, he's had years and I've only had weeks."

"Shut up, Fabray!" Santana left her seat and moved towards her. "We go together, all of us and if anyone disagrees I might have to go all Lima Heights on their ass, including yours!" She hugged her blonde friend really tight and as she did Rachel ran to her as well and then before she knew it, they were all reaching in for a giant group hug.

The faking it thing was going quite well for the most part. She felt a bit of a fraud though and spent a lot of time avoiding her friends from Glee, fearing that one wrong move might just reveal that she was desperately unhappy at her situation. When it came to Rachel Berry, that was particularly true. She just had a way of seeing straight through whatever defenses you put up and calling you out on it.

Rachel for her part was frustrated. She had thought with everything they had been through that she and Quinn were firm friends but Quinn was avoiding spending any quality time with her. She had suggested they study together to catch up what they had missed, but Quinn preferred to study alone, or so she said. She had offered to go to rehab with Quinn, but Artie seemed to have cornered that. In Glee, they sometimes sat next to each other, but Brittany and Santana were also keen to occupy the space either side of her. Rachel didn't know what to do, so in typical fashion, she went in search of Quinn at recess to find out why she was avoiding her.

Rachel saw Quinn put something in her locker and was about to go and talk to her when Finn stepped in front of her for a kiss and a hug. Rachel didn't want to be rude to him so she watched Quinn go into the bathroom and determined that once she was done in there, she would approach. Finn chatted about football practice for a good five minutes, but Quinn didn't leave the bathroom and eventually he realized that Rachel wasn't listening and hadn't even glanced at him for a while.

"Rachel, are you with me?" he asked confused, peering over his shoulder. "Do you need to use the bathroom or something because you haven't stopped staring at the door for like, ages."

"Sorry," Rachel shook her head and took Finn's hand. "I really want to speak to Quinn today, but I also wanted to listen to your football story, so I was watching for her to come back out of the bathroom, but she hasn't yet and it's been more than five minutes. I think I should go and see if she's alright."

"Rachel," he shook his head, "don't you think if she needed help she would ask for it and maybe it's just hard for her right now, so give her some time to adjust."

"Finn I don't think you understand. I worry about her all the time now. It's difficult to explain, but I feel so bad that she was hurt much more than I was and we could easily be in the same position right now. I just need to know that she's okay. I'll see you in Glee later."

In the bathroom, things were not going as well as Quinn had hoped. The problem had been the skinny jeans. She had been slowly hitching them down past her hips but to do that meant sitting forward a little in the seat. Without the backrest behind her, her balance was precarious at best and she just wasn't concentrating as she should have been and tipped sideways. The result of that was that she was now lying on the floor of the handicapped stall desperately trying to pull her jeans back up. She had tried getting back in the chair once already and failed and she couldn't shout out for help with her jeans around her knees, she at least needed to be fully clothed. On top of that, she was feeling a little dizzy, which she now knew was her body's sign that she really needed to pee. It was at that moment that Quinn heard the door open and footsteps come through.

"Quinn?"

Oh crap, no. Quinn stopped moving and almost stopped breathing in the hope that Rachel would just leave.

"Is that you in there?"

Please leave, please leave, please leave.

"Quinn, please if you are in there answer me or I will have to go to the nurses' office and get someone to open the door."

Crap. "Don't do that, Rachel."

"Are you alright, you have been in here a long time, I wanted to talk to you, but you didn't come back out and I wondered if you needed any assistance."

"I'm fine Rachel, go away."

Rachel heard the direction of the voice and knew it was much lower than she had expected, even for someone sitting down. She glanced under the door and saw the wheels but also a pair of legs lying, half dressed.

"Did you fall? Are you alright?"

"Dammit, Rachel. Why can't you just do as I ask?"

"You didn't answer my question."

"Alright I fell, happy now? I'm fine. I can look after myself."

"Quinn, please open the door and let me help. I promise not to tell anyone about this, but I can't leave you here until I know that you're okay." Rachel's ear was pressed against the door and she could hear sobbing from behind. Please just let me help you get back in your chair and then I'll go. I promise."

She heard sniffing and a sigh, then some shuffling, the brakes on the wheelchair snapping off, wheels squeaking a little, and eventually the sliding of the door lock.

"I'm right behind the door," Quinn's tear filled voice replied. Rachel pulled open the cubicle door and saw a mop of blonde hair hanging on a downcast head.

"Are you hurt?" Rachel crouched beside her. She was sitting with her legs sprawled untidily in front of her and her face in her hands.

"I don't think so," I broke my fall with the handrail, but couldn't keep hold." Quinn took a deep breath and rubbed her eyes. "Stupid jeans!" She banged her fists on both thighs.

"Quinn, please. Don't do that." Rachel reached out and held her hands so she couldn't continue. "You'll hurt yourself if you keep doing that."

"I can't even feel it Rachel, so what does it matter?"

Rachel pulled the door closed behind them in case anyone else walked in. "I know you are not happy right at this moment, but we'll get you back in your chair and you'll be on your way to next period in no time." She tried to be cheery and light about it, right up until she saw the yellow puddle running across the floor.

Quinn saw it at the same time and just burst into tears. For minutes she was inconsolable, but Rachel just put her arms around her and held her until the sobbing faded. "Just leave me here, please. I can't stand this."

"It's alright," Rachel smoothed Quinn's hair back from her face and kissed the top of her head. "I'm getting some paper towels, I'll be a second." She slid the bolt back and was gone for the briefest time before slipping back in. "I think if I can get you on the toilet, you can clean yourself up and then I'll come back in and help you back in your chair. Do you have a change of clothes, because I always keep a spare outfit in my locker and I can go and run and get it."

"No, it's fine. I have my gym kit in my backpack for rehab later this afternoon."

Rachel looked at the logistics. Quinn was facing the wrong way. "How are we going to do this?"

"Give me a second." Quinn lifted her legs together with her hands. "If you can just spin me round, I can probably lift myself up with the bar.

Rachel looked at the possibility, but doubted that were true, otherwise Quinn would probably already have lifted herself up. "Just give me a hug and hold on." Rachel reached down to Quinn, her feet either side of the blonde girl's knees.

"Rachel, I'm too big for you to lift."

"Nonsense, I'm stronger than I look."

"I don't doubt but with your back you probably shouldn't be doing this so soon."

"Just do as I ask for once and stop fighting me." Rachel took hold and stood up with Quinn hanging on for dear life as her body stretched out. She spun her around and sat her back on the toilet seat, Quinn's arms gripping the bar alongside for balance. With Quinn off the floor Rachel dropped the paper towels over the wet patch. She moved Quinn's chair around to get her clean clothes out of the bag hanging off the back.

"No Rachel please I can do it," Quinn begged, but Rachel had already unzipped the bag and looked inside.

Rachel's hand fell on the first thing in there. She looked at it curiously and then recognized what it was.

"I'm sorry," she turned to Quinn whose face was burning.

"Just hand it over. I don't have any dignity left Rachel, so don't worry about it alright."

Rachel handed over the plastic bag with the tube inside. "Why do you need that if…" she indicated the puddle on the floor.

Quinn rolled her eyes. "Because I don't know if my bladder is empty or not. Rachel I can't feel anything from about two inches below my belly button; nothing."

"Sorry, I'll wait outside. I didn't mean to embarrass you." She slipped quietly outside the door and held it closed. She heard Quinn sigh and wondered if she was crying again and it broke her heart.

Quinn put the bag on the shelf and pulled her chair closer. She pulled out the sanitizer gel and wipes to clean herself up. She leaned back against the toilet seat and removed her jeans and did what she needed to do before taking the plastic bag again. She could hear Rachel's breathing but apart from that there was silence and it was deafening.

"Please say something Rachel, I can't stand the quiet. Talk to me about anything."

"Normally you accuse me of talking too much," she replied quietly from the other side of the door.

"Not this time," Quinn replied.

Rachel was just about to launch into a discussion about Mercedes' new haircut when the door opened and three sophomore girls walked in.

"Sorry girls but you need to find another bathroom at this juncture. This one is for seniors only." She shooed them out the door in typical Berry style. "So don't you love Mercedes new look, I really think she looks great when her hair is straight."

"Thanks, Rachel." Quinn responded as she efficiently slipped the plastic tube inside her urethra to drain her bladder properly. Meanwhile, Rachel continued with her virtual monologue. The bag filled part way, then she waited a little while pulling it a bit at a time to make sure she was as empty as possible.

Quinn took out clean underwear and her sweat pants. "I'm almost done; you don't have to stick around."

To her surprise, Rachel came back inside. She had her underwear on and was starting to pull up the pants. Rachel just watched as the other girl manipulated her feet and legs with her hands. "You seem to be managing that pretty well, shall I go back outside?"

Quinn shook her head. "Like I said, I don't really have any dignity left so it's fine."

"Don't say that," Rachel's brown eyes met slightly puffy hazel ones.

"Why not? It's the truth." Quinn looked down a moment to pull the pants up as far as she could. "I don't trust my balance on here, if I push myself up, can you pull my pants up the rest of the way. I usually dress on the bed not the toilet."

"Of course," Rachel moved in and did as she was asked. She pulled Quinn's chair closer and watched as the blonde put the brakes on. In a well-rehearsed move she slipped easily into the wheelchair, then pulled her legs into place one at a time.

"You made that look easy, I mean I remember seeing you do it in rehab and it always looked like it was such hard work. You're doing amazingly well."

"Rachel, please don't flatter me; I just peed myself and couldn't get up from the floor."

"Why are you being so down on yourself? I know how hard this is for you and I think you are amazing for coping with it." Rachel looked down. "I know it was only for a very brief time, but I remember waking up to that feeling of not being able to move and I was petrified."

Quinn didn't want to lose her temper but her frustration just boiled over. "I told you I don't deserve your sympathy; it only makes this harder." The words came out harsher than she had intended.

Rachel's face fell and she started to well with tears. "I knew it. This is why you've been avoiding me; because I recovered and you didn't. I'm so sorry but please don't push me away."

"Rach, please don't cry again. God, I'm always making you cry. I'm so glad that you're okay. I wasn't lying to you when I said that, honestly. The only good thing to come out of this whole crappy situation is seeing you walking around again."

"Then why are you being like this with me? I thought that now we're friends you would want to spend time together, but you've been avoiding me ever since the first few weeks in hospital and the only conclusion I could come to was that you were upset because I recovered and it was too upsetting for you to see that."

Quinn suddenly realized she had a hard choice to make. She could either be honest about her feelings for Rachel, or she could make an excuse for her behavior and agree to spend more time with her. For her own sanity, it would have to be the latter.

"I'm sorry. It's not just you I pushed away. This is hard to deal with and I didn't want you guys to see the downside of what I was going through, so apart from Artie, I haven't wanted to let anyone else see me when I'm vulnerable."

"Santana said you were avoiding being alone with her and Brittany too," Rachel sniffed back her tears.

"That's easy to explain," Quinn sighed. "It's the uniforms."

"Really?"

Quinn nodded. "I just got mine back that day. It's just a constant reminder every time I see that uniform in the corridors. Did you know Coach Sylvester offered to let me be an honorary cheerleader?"

"I heard. And it's a shame you turned it down, you know the uniform always did look good on you."

Quinn just laughed at that. The utter ridiculous nature of the whole episode just came to a head and Rachel made her laugh at the perfect time. Quinn laughed hard, so hard her ribs hurt and so hard that she made Rachel laugh as well. As they left the stall, almost laughing too much to breathe, Santana and Brittany came in the door.

They looked at Quinn and Rachel and then at each other and both started giggling at their friends' hysteria. Quinn and Rachel whose ribs were hurting so much they were trying to stop laughing, burst into another bout because now Brit and San were laughing uncontrollably.

Eventually regaining control, San looked at Quinn and asked her what they were laughing at. Quinn looked at Rachel and the two set off again as gasping, Quinn replied. "I just peed myself."

The four of them never made it to third period. Instead they sat on the floor, except Quinn who said she had spent quite enough time down there already for one day.

"I can't believe we're laughing at this," Santana announced, wiping her eyes so as not to disturb her mascara.

"Me either," Brittany agreed, clutching at her side.

Rachel, now recovered suggested they form a rota to make sure that Quinn got in and out of the bathroom safely at recess every day.

"Rachel, stop, please. You're killing me with kindness. It might have taken me all morning, but I would have got back in the chair on my own eventually. Not as smoothly I admit, but I can get myself back up from the floor. You just caught me in a moment of frustration, feeling sorry for myself."

"You mean you would just rather we leave you lying there than help?"

"Well, yeah. If everyone keeps helping me do things, I'm never going to be ready to go on my own to Yale in the fall."

"So you are still going?" Santana asked her.

"I want to," Quinn raised her eye. "They said I can defer for a semester or even a year if I want, but I don't want to get left behind here."

"You won't get left behind, I'll still be here." Brit smiled innocently.

"Thanks Brit," she returned the smile. "But I need to get out of Lima."

Santana eyed her suspiciously knowing exactly why but didn't pass comment on that. "Okay so to let you get out of here we need to leave your sorry ass on the floor if you fall again?" she grinned. "No problem!"

"Thanks guys." Quinn chuckled again. "Let's get out of here. I missed enough classes already and I have straight A's to protect."


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I own nothing

Chapter 4

Quinn hadn't expected Santana's promise to be put to the test quite so soon and hadn't expected Brittany would be the cause, but the following week Mr Schue wanted to pay homage to Whitney and so they had an assignment to work on. In the choir room, Brit sang an amazing version of 'I wanna dance with somebody' and after the first two verses had started pulling everyone up to dance. She grabbed Artie, knowing him so well, she had done it hundreds of times, and pulled him forwards, he rolled freely towards her and even pirouetted on the way. Quinn just hadn't been expecting Brit to grab a hold of her hands and pull her the same way, catching her by surprise.

For her part Brittany hadn't realized that unlike Artie, who was so used to his chair, Quinn was still learning and had both brakes firmly fastened. It was so quick, that everyone saw too late what was happening and could do nothing to stop it. As Brit tugged she was expecting Quinn to roll towards her, but caught by surprise, Quinn had no hands free to prevent herself falling, so she just slipped straight to the floor, knees first, her legs buckling under her. Brit, surprised by what happened, couldn't do anything except let go and fortunately Quinn's hands flew to the floor to soften the landing.

Everyone stopped and looked in horror at Quinn as she sat sprawled out on the floor and then there was a rush forwards from Brit who was panicking that she had hurt her friend. She was going to just lift her back up, but the first to react was actually Rachel, who had been sitting just behind Quinn and hadn't gotten up to dance, so had witnessed the whole thing.

"It's okay Brit," Rachel stepped in front of Quinn and caught the much taller girl by the shoulders before she could bend to grab the fallen former cheerleader. She eyed Santana who immediately came and grabbed her distraught girlfriend who was now in tears and apologizing over and over to Quinn.

Pretty much everyone else was just staring at Quinn waiting for a response. "Just go sit down everyone and let Quinn sort herself out without you all gaping at her."

Artie immediately rolled up beside Quinn. "Are you okay?

"I'm fine actually," she replied as she pushed herself back against the frame of the wheelchair. "Brit, really I'm okay," she called over to her. "And you don't all have to sit down, I don't care if you all watch me, in fact stay where you are. I want you all to see that it's no big deal."

Rachel watched on warily, reluctant to move aside so the rest of the Glee club could see what was happening.

"Rachel, please. It's fine." The brunette stepped aside, still feeling very protective of Quinn. Quinn sighed and pulled her legs out from underneath her, tucked her knees up towards her chest and then put her hands behind her on the frame of the chair. Her knees fell to the side as she let go of them, but her feet stayed in the same place, which is what she had intended. Pushing down really hard, her body moved upwards between the frame and as she straightened her arms, her hips were high enough to slide back into the seat. She wasn't quite in properly, but she could now reach the back wheels and pushed down again to lift her butt right to the back of the chair. A quick pull of both legs brought her feet back into position and she was, though slightly flustered and breathing a little heavy from the exertion of the lift, back seated as she had been before.

Rachel seemed pleased she was okay and gave her shoulder a squeeze as she stepped behind to go back to her seat. Artie gave her arm a squeeze as well and then reversed back to the opposite side where he had been before. Mr Schue looked like he was a little out of his depth at first but gathering his thoughts, he now calmed everyone down and got them to go sit back in their seats without drawing any more attention to Quinn. But Quinn's hazel eyes were glued to Brittany, who had her head down and looked so sad even though Santana was reminding her of their agreement in the toilets.

Quinn flicked the brakes off her chair and rolled forwards, right behind Santana and pulled the couple apart. Taking Brit's hands she pulled her forwards.

"Sit," she indicated to Brit, who followed the instruction and dropped into Quinn's lap. Quinn pulled Brit's arms around her and they shared a big hug for quite a long time. "Brit, are you listening to me?"

There was no reply; tears were running down her face still, but she felt a head nodding against her shoulder.

"I am okay. It was just an accident and you didn't mean to pull me out onto the floor. I'm not upset."

Brit held on really tightly for virtually another whole minute. Eventually she whispered in Quinn's ear. "I'm really sorry if you have bruises, can I go and get some ice for your knees?"

Making their way back to their seats, Quinn looked up briefly and met Rachel's gaze. She silently mouthed the words 'thank you' to Rachel who just returned a huge smile.

"So I wanted to suggest a sleepover at my house," Rachel just wanted things to return to normal. "Just the senior girls, oh and Kurt of course; one last time before we leave."

"That sounds like a cool idea," Mercedes replied the suggestion. "Everyone will come right?"

"Of course, I want to dance on your stage and raid your dads' liquor cabinet again," Santana was keen.

"Do I get to go even if I'm not graduating?" Brit looked confused.

"Of course, you're still a senior," Rachel looked up at Quinn who so far had been the only one not to reply positively. "Quinn, you'll come right?"

"It's a great idea but I don't think I will be able to make it. Thanks for inviting me though."

"Can I ask why?" Rachel would just never accept things without a lengthy explanation.

"Well, your basement is down a flight of stairs and last I remember, there's no elevator at your house. Then your bedroom is upstairs and I hate to be a broken record but same problem. It's just easier if I don't come."

"I can just give you a piggy back, I used to do it for Artie at my house all the time," Brit didn't think it was a big deal.

"Thanks for rubbing that in my face," Santana responded.

"I forgot," Rachel replied. "Quinn, I'm so sorry. I didn't even think about that. That was really thoughtless of me."

"It's fine, actually it's nice you forgot," Quinn quirked her eyebrow.

"Hey, why are you pandering to her," Santana looked fierce, which she did on a regular basis so it wasn't that unusual, but in this instance, she wasn't about to take no for an answer. "Q, either we have the sleepover at Rachel's and you put up with us lugging you around or we have it at your house and there's no problem. Either way this is happening and it's happening with you. I'm fed up of you pretending like us helping out occasionally is some sort of burden."

Quinn looked a little nervous at the thought. "I just don't like the idea that I am ruining things for everyone else."

"Why don't you just get that we would rather you were there, even if it means we have to work a bit harder to include you, than not have you around. We already missed out having you around for two months."

She was grateful for Santana's straightforwardness. "I suppose it would be easier for me to have it at mine," she conceded. "I'll have to check with mom. I don't think she would mind, but it was your idea Rach so if you want it at yours, I guess I can let Brit give me a piggy back."

Rachel had a huge grin. "I just want us all to be together, I don't care where we do it, so if it makes you more comfortable, we'll have it at your house, Quinn."

The Fabray house was huge compared to everyone else's, even Rachel's. After the accident, Judy had stripped out the den and her former husband's home office to make a room and bathroom downstairs for Quinn. As a result Quinn's bedroom was now three times the size it had been and she had inherited the huge TV and music system that had been in the den before. Still, despite that she missed her old room upstairs. She looked around and fluffed up the pillows on the sofa.

Rachel, unsurprisingly was the first to arrive, with Kurt of course. They brought bags of things even though Judy had filled the fridge for them before she had gone out for the evening. She was still reluctant to leave her daughter alone in the house, but was getting better at it now Quinn was back in school. For her part, she was thrilled at the sleepover idea even though Quinn had looked a little embarrassed at asking her. Once she knew that Rachel would be there, she relaxed a little about going out and leaving them; Rachel was so sensible and of course Kurt was gay so he was safe to be let in the house as well.

Rachel and Kurt were parked in the car outside. For some reason, Rachel had butterflies in her stomach. They left the car and walked up the ramp that went to the front door. Kurt pressed the bell and they heard it ring inside, but they had to wait a while for Quinn to open the door.

Kurt jumped right in and gave her a hug. "I love your sweater," he said as they parted.

"Thanks, it's new."

"Next we'll get you back in mini-skirts and the correct order of the universe will be restored."

"Kurt!" Rachel pinched him.

"What?"

"Hey Rach," Quinn rolled her eyes as she gave the diva a hug as well. "Come on in," Quinn spun around and lead them across the wooden floor of the hallway, which was double-height and huge.

"Oh my gosh, I heard your house was a mansion, but I didn't realize that it like totally _is_ a mansion."

Quinn hadn't had much opportunity to invite friends over to her house. It hadn't been a happy place for a long time and even though she and her mom were getting along well now, she hadn't really had the friends to invite before.

Rachel hadn't seen it since before the accident and her eyes were flicking around seeing the changes. The hall used to have carpet and there had been a step inside the door that was now a shallow ramp.

"Come on, let's get some music on. I really need to eat as well." Kurt was always good at making sure there were no awkward silences.

Mercedes arrived ten minutes later and Rachel let her in to save Quinn having to get the door. Santana and Brittany were last, no surprise there. By the time they arrived, The others were in the kitchen eating chips around the table and gossiping.

"Hola, mi amiga's," Santana sat on Quinn's lap for a hug and glanced around. "I like what you did with the place, Q."

They moved from the kitchen to Quinn's room and it drew a lot of compliments. It was a mature type of décor to suit someone of her age rather than the younger looking room she had left behind upstairs. But it was also a room she hadn't really had time to personalize with all the little things a person gets from life. There were no photos stuck to the mirror or trinkets from holidays and all the other sort of things girls had. It made it seem like a very beautiful show house.

It also had some things in she would rather no one saw, but these were her friends and they pretty much knew what she was living with so she had let them all in for the first time. Not many people got to see who she really was.

Santana of course just had to pick on things, she couldn't let it lie. In fact she and Rachel were really similar in that respect. After they had admired the sofa and the TV and the décor, Santana looked in the corner of the room. "What's this?" She wandered over and looked at it a little curiously.

Quinn groaned. "It's a standing frame. I'm supposed to spend a couple of hours a day in it."

"Why?"

"It's good for me. It keeps the bones in my legs from getting weaker or something like that and it makes my heart work harder so I don't get problems with my circulation." Quinn hoped she would leave it now.

"So how's it work?"

"You're not going to let this drop until I show you, I just know it."

"You don't have to pander to her curiosity, you know." Rachel gave Santana a stare.

"It's fine, she's just going to go on and on about it otherwise." Quinn spun around and went to the frame. "It's not that exciting trust me, actually it's really boring so I usually do my homework when I'm in it." She slid across to the seat part and strapped her feet into the bottom of the frame as the rest of them gathered around to watch. Fastening the belt around her hips, she started to pull the handle that gradually raised the seat until she was upright and her stomach pressed against the pad in front of her. The frame had a tray attached that she could lean her elbows on and use as a desk.

Quinn didn't notice everyone's faces as she raised herself up, she was busy concentrating on making sure everything stayed in the right place. "So once I'm up it's just a matter of finding something to do, because I'm pretty much stuck here until I get back in my chair…" her voice tailed off as she realized they had all gone quiet, even Kurt.

"When did you get taller than me?" Brittany whispered.

Quinn laughed. "I'm not, it's just the frame's couple of inches off the floor, Brit."

"Oh good, I thought I might be shrinking."

Quinn rolled her eyes and reached around her for a hug.

"Girl, it's so good to see you standing again," Mercedes agreed. "Even if it's with the help of this thing."

Santana was quiet, too quiet. A silent tear ran from each of her eyes and then she just ran out. Brittany's eyes followed Santana but she didn't follow her girlfriend, she knew she would need a little time to calm down.

Quinn's eyes narrowed as she heard the door close.

"Don't worry about San, she pretends to be all hard but sometimes she's soft in the middle like fluffy pillows but she doesn't like anyone to see." Brit squeezed her hand.

"Go get her, please. I want to talk to her. God, I hate being in this thing; I can't move." Frustrated, Quinn started to lower her body but it would take a few minutes to extricate herself from the standing frame.

"I'll go," Rachel volunteered and went quickly out the door. She found Santana on the other side of it. The Latina was sat with her knees pulled up to her chest and she was clearly trying to control her tears. Rachel just sat beside her and didn't say anything, she simply took one of Santana's hands in her own and held it for a little while.

"It's not fair, what she's going through. How can she not be pissed?" Huge tears were still rolling down her face. "She's a cheerleader for God's sake and now she can't even stand up without a stupid machine to do it for her!"

"I don't know," Rachel answered simply. "She wants to talk to you though," she added. "I was sent to bring you back in."

The others just watched as Quinn finally slid her hips across into the wheelchair and was mobile again. She was about to head for the door, when it re-opened and Rachel walked in. "She just needs a little while to get a handle on her emotions," Rachel smiled. "She's okay, Quinn."

Sure enough, five minutes later Santana returned. She had a small smile across her lips but was clearly still upset. Brit immediately went to her and threaded her arm through her girlfriend's to escort her to the sofa where everyone else was waiting.

"Sorry, Q," Santana's eyes were momentarily downcast. "I know you don't want us getting all emotional and stuff, but when I saw you stood up, I … it was just good to look you in the eye again and I'm sorry I freaked out."

Quinn thought about what had just happened and wanted to talk but she didn't want there to be a gap created by the chair. She looked over at the bed and had an idea.

"Let's talk, guys, but first I need you all to be comfortable and it's just not with me in the chair sometimes, so let's all pile on the bed. This is a sleepover right? Everyone in PJ's now." Quinn decided she needed to be brave and not feel so sensitive about herself any more. She could have slipped into the bathroom to get changed so they didn't have to see her struggle to change, but that was stupid. She had been hiding how difficult these things were from them for long enough. Maybe them seeing it would make it easier to accept. Even though Kurt was an honorary girls he was still banished briefly while they stripped off.

Quinn whipped her top over her head and her bra followed. Santana, never shy, didn't even bother to hide her curiosity and watched Quinn's muscular upper body wriggle into the sleeveless PJ top, whilst her lower body remained inert. She noticed immediately, how much more muscle was evident in her shoulders. The Latina was changed in a flash, cheerleaders were used to it.

She wandered across the room as Quinn struggled with the jeans she had been wearing. There was no attempt to help, she just watched as the blonde shifted her weight from one hip to the other in order to hitch them a little lower each time. Once they were past her hips, Quinn was able to lift her legs out of them. Santana saw how the muscles which Quinn had used to such good effect in cheering, were just lax now. Her hand squashed into the flesh of her thigh without resistance. Her lower leg hung limply as she lifted behind her knee. Eventually she had them off and the other girls, also finished, followed Santana.

"So this is what takes me ages guys," Quinn said with a shrug. "It's why I take forever in the restroom now. I mean I'm getting quicker but it's not an exact science. It depends what clothes I'm wearing. Tight jeans are like the worst, but I get nervous wearing a dress or skirt, keep thinking someone will get an eyeful."

"San wouldn't mind that," Brittany announced.

"Brit!" Her girlfriend hissed.

"Yeah but one strong gust of wind and everyone would get to see which day of the week is on my panties," Quinn laughed. She nodded at the shorts on the end of her bed, which Rachel was stood closest to. "Rach, throw them over please." Her small friend brought them round and handed them to her. "Thanks. Shorts are easy." Quinn didn't make eye contact as she slipped them over her feet, which hung limply off the footrest where she had abandoned them. Pushing herself upright, she then tugged them easily up as far as her knees. She lifted each thigh and pulled them higher again, finally a few more shuffles from one side to the other and she had them on. "Tada!" She did a little jazz hands when she was done and then adjusted her legs in the chair. "And now for my next trick," Quinn spun round and was going to say something funny but she felt a pair of arms grab her from behind and give her a huge hug. She recognized Santana's coffee-colored skin embrace her. Quinn put a hand on top of San's and squeezed. "It's okay, San. I'm not lying to you honestly. I just want you to understand that if nothing else. It's okay." Santana didn't let go though.

"You are fucking amazing, Q." It was a whisper, but everyone heard it, except Kurt who was shouting from the hallway to be let back in.

"We're all decent, Kurt." Mercedes gave him the all clear.

Quinn pulled closer to the bed and did her thing, sliding onto the mattress, lifting her legs up one at a time and then dragging herself backwards until her back hit the pillows piled against the headboard. Rachel moved her chair away a little and sat back next to her. Seeing Quinn's reaction to her chair being moved away Rachel reassured her.

"I'll make sure I move it back when I get up." Quinn gave her arm a squeeze of thanks.

On the other side Quinn called Santana over and put her arm around her shoulder as she lay down beside her. Mercedes and Brittany both laid down facing Quinn at the bottom of the bed and Kurt laid himself across Rachel's lap. "It's a good job you have the biggest bed in the world Quinn," Brit said dryly, meaning every word.

Quinn laughed. "Okay guys look, I get it okay. You have questions and I have been avoiding answering, so now there's no freakin' chair in the way, come on. Ask me whatever you want and I'll be honest, though I can't say I won't get upset. We have a few weeks left together and I don't want everyone wondering what I'm thinking or how I'm feeling. That's all it's been for the last two weeks and I want our time to be spent talking about all of us and what we're going to be doing in the future."

"So we can ask anything?" Mercedes looked down briefly.

"Absolutely," Quinn replied meeting her steady gaze.

"Neither of you talked about the accident at all. What was it like?"

Rachel had been looking at Mercedes, but at the question, her eyes flew to Quinn.

Quinn looked up and shrugged. "I don't remember anything about it. I remember talking to Rach and she sent a text message to Finn and that's it for me until I woke up a week later, even then I don't really remember much of the first few days after that. I didn't even see the truck."

"Were you scared? I mean when you woke up."

"I was terrified at first, then my mom was talking to me saying not to worry, everything was going to be alright and I thought she meant that I was going to be fine." Quinn's voice cracked a little. "For a couple of days I was so out of it I didn't realize anything was wrong, then I started asking questions because I could see the nurse doing things but I didn't know what it was because I couldn't feel it." She tried to smile through the explanation, but the corners of her mouth kept dropping. "Eventually the doctor came in, did some tests and started to explain the injuries and saved the big one for last. He just said it like it was something you say every day. You have a serious spinal cord injury at the top of your lumbar spine, L1 and L2." She took a deep breath to control her voice. "I don't think I really understood it even then, despite checking how much I could feel and move, so I just asked him what that meant and he dropped it on me. You are paralyzed from just below your waist down."

They all had tears in their eyes at this point.

"Anyway, so I asked him how long it would last and he just made some platitudes about swelling might go down over the next few days and weeks, it's too early to say how much movement and sensation you will recover, but the chances of a full recovery are slim, less than five percent. The damage was pretty bad and it looked unlikely that I would ever recover enough to be able to walk unaided." She paused to take a breath. "You and Finn came to see me a little while later and I think I was a bit messed up, but I'm not that clear about things after, they kind of had me doped up."

Rachel took her hand and squeezed it tightly. "I remember, we were really worried about you."

Quinn smiled at her. "I was really happy to see you were okay though, I'd been panicking before that and just to hear your voice was amazing. We couldn't see each other," Quinn explained to the rest of them. "Rachel was stuck in a wheelchair and I couldn't even move my head so I could only see someone standing over me."

"What does it feel like?" Santana asked the question they all wanted to, but daren't.

"It's hard to explain. At first when I was lying down all the time, it was like my legs weren't even there. It just felt like my body stopped halfway down my stomach. I would reach under the sheet and touch my leg, but it was like I was touching someone else. Then when they sat me up, I could see my body was still there and it sort of felt like I was floating in water up to my waist." She shrugged.

"What about now?"

"It's sort of different again now. I suppose I have got used to it a little. So long as I can see them, I sort of have a sense of where my legs are, but I still can't feel anything. I think my brain sort of knows where they are. I know that sounds really weird but that's the only way to describe it. Honestly, I just hope that none of you do ever understand what it's like. I wouldn't wish this on anyone."

"Can I touch your leg?" Brit asked.

"Sure," Quinn quirked an eyebrow. Trust Brit to be left field.

Brit reached forwards and touched Quinn's lower leg. "It feels normal, I thought it would feel strange."

"When I touch them, I can feel my leg with my hands but my leg can't feel my hands."

"I can't even imagine," Mercedes said quietly.

"Yeah you can, touch my leg. Everybody touch my legs." Quinn realized everyone was starting to get comfortable and not so distant. They all put a hand on one of her legs and ran it up and down. "See, they don't feel any different to you, I just can't feel your hands at all."

"That's kind of good when you're shaving your legs though, right?" Brit screwed up her nose in thought.

They all giggled at that.

"So where does it stop?" Santana just couldn't help her curiosity.

Quinn glanced across at the chocolate brown eyes which were fixed on her lower body. "Don't freak out on me when I show you." She lifted her top a little just enough to expose the pale skin of her lower abdomen, pushed the waist of her shorts down a little and drew a line across her abdomen just below her belly button. "There's a line across here where its hypersensitive; it sort of tickles for about half an inch, then nothing. It's kind of higher on the back as well…" Quinn paused because she didn't just hear, but also felt in her chest when Santana took a sharp breath in. She looked across and saw a huge tear run down her friend's cheek. The rest of them looked away briefly, not wanting to think about what that meant. "Hey, come on. I said don't freak out on me. You wanted to know."

Rachel shook her head. "I just don't know how you can get used to that, Quinn."

"I don't have a choice, Rach. I spent the first few days just thinking about it all the time and wishing it would go away and kept checking my skin to see if I could feel any lower down, but it never changed. I don't even know how many hours I prayed for a sign that it was getting better, but it didn't. Eventually I just stopped wishing and praying because I realized it wasn't ever going to work. I suppose that's the point I realized I had accepted it."

"So, there's not anything that they can do to help?" Mercedes was a little horrified. "I thought they could do all kinds of stuff with stem cells."

"You should totally ask Artie to borrow his Rewalk legs," Brit was on roll.

"Thanks guys," Quinn's voice was still a little husky with emotion, but she was smiling at them. "But I feel like I've spent my whole life worrying about what I look like. I wasn't happy when I was in grade school and so I made all those changes thinking it would make me happy and then I spent the first three years of high school always wanting more and fighting over stupid boys because I always thought that if I didn't have my looks, I had nothing. I'm tired of the life I had before. I wasn't happy, not really. That was until the run up to regionals; finding out I got into Yale and becoming a better person. I finally found myself happy with who I was, but it wasn't what I looked like or being a cheerleader that did that, it was finally having real friends and a future that depended on my brains instead of a pretty face. The doctors told me that maybe in ten or twenty years there might be something that can reverse my injury, but that I shouldn't live life expecting it and they're right, so I'm not going to. If it finds me that will be great but for now, the pressure to be who I was is off and I can just be like everyone else in Glee and be myself. I've never done that, just be myself with no insecurities."

"What were you so afraid of before?" Rachel asked.

"This," she pointed down at her legs, "and that." She pointed at the wheelchair. "But the worst thing that I can imagine already happened _and I survived_, I don't really have anything left to be afraid of now."

Rachel curled into Quinn and put an arm around her ribs. "You are totally amazing, Quinn Fabray. I always said you were so much more than a pretty face and I was right. Some people thought you were shallow, but I always knew you had something special inside you."

"If you did, you knew it long before I did. I just wish I hadn't wasted all that time worrying that everyone was a threat to my status, like it was real."

"I have an idea." Kurt wanted to lighten the mood, which had gotten a little somber. "What would you tell your freshman self if you could go back and start over?" Kurt asked all of them.

"Believe in yourself," Mercedes responded. "What about you?"

He thought about it for a moment. "It will get easier to be you."

"Mine's easy," Rachel replied. "Talk less and listen more."

Quinn and Santana both looked at Rachel open mouthed.

"You two don't have a monopoly on personal growth you know."

"Santana, what's yours?" Quinn asked.

"Don't be a bitch _all the time_," she shrugged.

"Brit?"

"Feed Lord Tubbington less, oh, and find where he hides his cigarettes."

They all chuckled.

"So just you Quinn." Kurt looked expectantly at her.

"Don't waste your life wanting to be prom queen!"

"Oh my gosh, that's coming up soon," Brit suddenly remembered she was supposed to be organizing it. "I think I better see Principal Figgins about it on Monday now I decided on a theme."

"Really? What's it going to be?" Kurt had mixed feelings about the whole thing after last year.

"Dinosaurs!" Brit clapped her hands excitedly.

"Genius idea!" Santana commented.


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I own nothing

Chapter 5

"Hey, Rach. Wait up!" Rachel was stood by her locker at recess.

"Hi Quinn." Rachel looked excited to see her. "We're all going shopping for prom dresses and I know you don't have physical therapy this afternoon so how about it?"

"Okay, thanks for asking me. I'm going to need some help trying them on though."

"Why do you think we picked today?" Rachel replied.

"Can I ask another favor?"

"Do you need some help in the bathroom?"

"What? No. You know how one of your dad's is a lawyer and the other is a financial advisor?"

Her friend nodded.

"Do you think they could give me and mom some legal and financial advice? It'd to do with the insurance from the accident. Mom and I are in over our heads."

"Let me speak to them," Rachel took out her cell phone. "Hi Daddy," there was a pause. "No there's no problem, I just wanted to ask you something for my friend Quinn. She and her Mom would like some advice about the insurance from her accident and I wondered if they came over for dinner one evening this week that would be okay." Rachel nodded and gave Quinn a thumbs up. "We're getting prom dresses after school today." Another pause. "Okay, I'll ask." Putting her hand over the phone, she asked "How about tomorrow evening at seven, come for dinner?"

Quinn nodded, "Are you sure it's okay?"

"Of course, what are friends for?" Rachel spoke to her dad again briefly and then hung up.

"Thanks, you don't know how much this means to Mom and me."

Trying on dresses was fun, though hard work. They all needed help with a zip here and there, but obviously Quinn needed more than the rest. Rachel and Santana helped her try on a lemon dress which looked good on the hanger.

"How we gonna do this Q?"

The changing room was a little crowded even though it was bigger than the rest. Quinn shrugged. "I have no idea, we'll have to figure it out as we go." She stripped off her top and less embarrassed than she would have been with anyone else, she unfastened her jeans and peeled them down over her hips. Shuffling side to side she got the jeans as far as mid-thigh. "Rach, can you pull them off for me?" She gripped the wheels of her chair and held on as Rachel grabbed the bottom of her jeans and pulled both legs off most of the way but stopped short so her feet didn't drop down too sharply at the end.

Untangling Quinn's feet and laying the jeans on a chair, Rachel looked at Santana who had taken the dress off the hanger and unzipped the back. "Overhead and pull down?" she shrugged.

"Let's try it," San looked at Quinn. "Arms up," she instructed.

Quinn was slightly slouched in her chair so she could get the dress behind her back. Sat in just her underwear, it was easy to see how pale she was compared to the perfect tan she used to carry. Rachel actually thought she looked good, considering what she's been through. Her top half at least looked toned and lean. She couldn't say that for the bottom half. Quinn had worked very hard physically to get back into shape after Beth was born and Rachel felt a little sad that her friend's hips now looked drawn and bony, which isn't the same as slim and toned. She wondered if the body conscious teenager was eating properly.

Quinn's long, muscular arms stretched up and reminded Rachel of how tall she was. Quinn's arms were probably as long as her legs! San dropped the dress unceremoniously over the top and let it fall. It had a few layers to the skirt and so it sort of sat around rather than draped over Quinn's body and her arms were stuck in the top of the dress as a result.

"Can you pull it down a bit or I'll tear it," the blonde asked. Santana tugged at the body and managed to get it lower so Quinn could drop her hands onto the wheels. "When I push up, you guys pull the dress down and under my butt if you can." Quinn did as she said she would and grimaced a little with the effort of holding herself up for a couple of minutes while the other two girls struggled to get the layers of material over their friend's limp lower body.

Eventually done, Quinn dropped her hips back down. "Oof," she muttered and then shook her aching arms.

"Oh, Quinn it looks lovely." Rachel liked it.

"The color looks good on you," San agreed.

Quinn tried to push herself in front of the mirror, but the skirt was tangling around the frame of the chair and the wheels and kept getting caught. "It's no good like this, there's too much material in it. I need something more fitted I think." She huffed a little. "Back to square one, girls. Sorry it was such a lot of effort."

Rachel and Santana weren't in the slightest worried and proceeded to help her out of it, which was much easier than getting in because they literally peeled it up over her head. Rachel went off to find something different, leaving her and Santana in the room.

Quinn was a little uncomfortable sitting in just her underwear, but Santana didn't seem bothered. "Shame, that was a nice one."

"It would have been cute if I was walking," Quinn agreed.

"Are you pissed about it?" San looked at her friend. "I would be."

Quinn laughed, "You get mad at so much, it's not really a measure of anything."

Santana had to agree and nodded. She organized the dress back on the hanger. "I wonder what Rach will come back with. Are you worried. It could be pink and flowery."

"Leave her alone, she knows how to dress for an occasion."

"I'm surprised you're not uncomfortable with her helping you in a state of undress."

Rachel was just about to knock to come back in, when she heard Santana.

"I am," Quinn replied, "but that's got more to do with the fact that I am sitting in a bra and panties with the both of you."

Rachel hadn't heard the whole conversation and thought Santana's question a little odd, without any context, but Quinn's answer had been very open and so she didn't think any more about it and pretended she hadn't heard. "I'm back with two more," she announced and tapped to be let back in. "I have this lilac one and also this pale blue. They are both much more fitted and not so floaty. What do you think?" She asked holding them both out. "I got the long fitting in the blue one and the regular in the lilac to see which length you prefer. I wasn't sure how much leg you wanted to show off."

"More like how much I want to hide," Quinn stated flatly.

"Why hide them at all?" Santana asked. "It's not like they look weird or anything."

Quinn looked down at her legs and frowned. "They look too skinny and pale." She shook her head.

"With the right dress and stockings, they'll look lovely like the rest of you," Rachel said with sincerity.

Quinn frowned again. "If you think I am going to have mine on show next to the best pair of legs in Ohio," she pointed at Santana, still in her Cheerio's uniform, "think again!"

"You can't keep doing that Q." Santana leaned over and put her hands on Quinn's knees. "You can't keep comparing yourself to everyone else or even before and after the accident. You'll just be unhappy if you do."

Quinn sighed and met her friend's dark gaze. "Okay I'll try the shorter one, just to keep you happy, but if my legs look awful, I'm going to go with the longer one."

Santana and Rachel looked at each other and smiled. Another small victory. They went for the same technique as before, but this time, knowing what to do and have a smaller dress made it much easier.

"It looks good," Santana was quick to comment.

"Yeah, really lovely," Rachel agreed.

The color was perfect with Quinn's blonde hair. She arranged her legs straight as she sat back and then wheeled to the mirror. She looked at her reflection. The dress was sleeveless, had narrow straps over the shoulder and a plunging neckline that matched the edge of her bra and showed just enough cleavage without being vulgar. The body had ruches which flattered her trim torso and it hugged her hips so that there was no superfluous material to catch on her chair. The dress ended just above her knees but with her legs arranged as they were, she didn't like it. The dress being fitted held her knees together, unlike when she was wearing jeans and they tended to fall apart, but still, she looked … paralyzed.

It was easy to hide the truth under clothes normally, but this was different. She was getting better at dealing with it, but when it was so obvious, it was harder.

Pushing her legs around a little, she tried to make them seem less obviously useless, but no matter where she placed her knees or feet with her hands, it was always the same.

Santana glanced at Rachel, who met her gaze. The taller girl rolled her eyes as if Quinn was being overly self-conscious. Rachel just shrugged, not really knowing what to say or do to help.

"What do you think? You've not really said anything." Rachel could tell Quinn wasn't entirely happy.

"I'm trying to do what San just said and not compare before and after, but it's not easy." A puff of air escaped her lips, blowing her hair out of her eyes.

"What's matter with how you look? The dress is gorgeous."

"On you maybe, but it's just … I don't know. My legs just look … useless. For one night I would just like them to look normal."

San's gaze fell, not really knowing what to say to make Quinn feel any better about herself, but Rachel suddenly had an idea.

"Cross your legs," she said quickly.

"What?"

"That's what you do if you are in a nice but short dress at a party and you want to still look sexy when you sit down. You just cross your legs."

Quinn looked at her short friend a little oddly. "I don't know if they will stay there, I'm not really in control of them anymore." She shrugged.

"Trust me, just try. Do you need some help."

"Maybe, I haven't tried it before." Quinn moved her knees apart a little with her hands and then tried to lift one leg over the other, but she was struggling to keep her balance and move her leg at the same time. "If I hold on, can you lift one leg over?" she gripped the wheels as Rachel dropped lower and gently raised Quinn's right leg and lifted it over the left. It didn't sit right straight away, but with a little tugging of the dress and adjusting the left foot, Quinn's right leg fell alongside the left and looked just like anyone else's crossed legs did.

"What do you think?" Rachel said.

"Sexy," San wasn't shy about it. "If you were sat in an ordinary chair, no one would know Q, honest. Especially with heels."

"Really?" She had to admit that with her posture slightly altered, it did look like she was just sitting normally. Her right foot was sort of hanging down a little, but pretty much everyone's does when they sit cross-legged.

San sat on the chair in the corner and crossed her legs. "How does this look any different?" she asked, completely seeing what a good suggestion it had been from Rach.

Quinn looked at San's legs. "No different, I guess." She looked back at her own again. Turning to Rachel, she simply said, "Let's show the other's and see what they think."

The remaining Glee girls and Kurt had been waiting some time for them, though none of them were either surprised or judgmental about how long it had taken to get Quinn in and out of a couple of dresses.

Kurt jumped up and clapped his hands, like he always did when he was extremely excited. Santana and Rachel stepped aside and Quinn rolled out between them to reveal her dress. "Oh my God! Legs!" Kurt cried out and then gave Quinn a huge hug.

"You go girl!" Mercedes added after him.

"Totally unicorn," Brit added.

"The rest of you hurry and get trying dresses, I am taking Quinn to look for shoes," Kurt insisted. "A spike heel is no good for you, it will just hang off the back of the footrest. Now I think you should go with wedges, because, well they will sit okay and they are totally in right now."

Quinn looked up and grinned at him. "Kurt, you are our style guru. What would we do without you?"

"Look terribly unfashionable, but in your case, still cute as a button. The dress is perfect for your coloring, Quinn and I'm proud of you or not hiding your legs away. It's been too long since we saw them out and for me they are still the best legs at McKinley."

"I think that may just be flattery on your part but my bruised ego could do with that right now, so I won't argue."

They browsed the shoe aisle in the department store. Kurt picked up a couple of pairs, both silver wedges but not too high. "Try these on," he said. They match really well and they're not so high."

Quinn asked a shop assistant to bring them in her size. The woman took them from her and went out back to the storeroom. A few moments later she returned with the boxes.

"Do you want some help or can you manage?" The assistant asked.

"My friend here will help if I do, but thank you."

Kurt took the first pair and met Quinn's gaze. "Which foot first?"

"Left," she replied, slipping her right hand under her knee and pulling it from over the other.

Kurt noticed her right foot fell awkwardly and straightened it for her before handing her the shoe.

Quinn lifted her left foot up and across her right knee so she could put the shoe on. The first part was easy but the strap fastened to the side and she couldn't get to it because that part of her foot was resting on her opposite knee, so she left it unfastened. "I'll put the right one on, then you can fasten them for me if you don't mind." Kurt handed the other one over and waited for her to repeat the process. With both feet back on the footrest, he fastened the straps for her.

"I wouldn't even bother with this pair he nodded at the box, these are perfect. Quinn lifted her right leg back over the left, easily managing it herself this time and looked around for a mirror. "Here, let me give you a push in your chariot, milady," he said with flamboyance that only Kurt could pull off.

Sat in front of the full length mirror, Quinn glanced at her appearance and realized that she looked okay.

"What do you think?" She asked Kurt.

"I think you look stunning and every girl at prom will wish they looked as good as you," he squeezed her shoulder.

The following evening, Rachel was excited to welcome Quinn and Judy around. Luckily there were no steps into the ground floor of the beautiful if eccentric home. Judy watched her daughter get out of the car and into the wheelchair with some pride, remembering that the accident had only been twelve weeks earlier and Quinn was already so independent. The doctor had told her that she should expect her daughter's recovery to take a year to eighteen months to manage her life without much help, but Quinn had achieved most things way ahead of schedule.

Once settled, Judy collected her bag with all the papers in it and followed Quinn to the door. They didn't even need to knock before Rachel opened it and met her friend with a huge hug and perpetual conversation. Quinn had been to the house before but her mother hadn't and spent quite a while admiring the ultra-modern décor as she and Hiram chatted about designers. Quinn for her part wasn't really interested and simply rolled into the middle of the room and mentioned to Rachel about how much her mom liked the prom dress. The girls chatted and waited for LeRoy to join them from the kitchen with a bottle of wine.

"Would everyone like a glass?" He waved the bottle. "This is a light little Californian as we are having fish, well apart from Rachel of course."

Judy accepted. "Just half a glass though please, I'm driving."

Quinn looked at her mom. "Is it okay?"

"Of course, Quinnie."

Rachel held out the glasses as her dad filled all five.

"I'm going to go and finish dinner," Hiram announced. "Why don't you sit at the table and discuss your legal issues with LeRoy and then we'll eat. The money matters can wait until after we've eaten."

Rachel didn't think she should stay and interfere so went to follow Hiram but Quinn pulled her back. "Rach, come sit down with us."

A little surprised but compliant, Rachel sat beside Quinn. Judy removed a whole raft of large white envelopes from her bag and sorted through to find the ones they wanted to talk to LeRoy about.

"So tell me what you are concerned about," LeRoy asked. "I know you made a claim as we did against the truck driver and his company."

"Quinn's insurance company has dealt with claims so far and they have sent us a breakdown of the offer from the other company, but we don't know if the settlement is fair. Russell used to deal with all this sort of thing and I was just not sure if we just take what they are offering or not. We don't have any knowledge of other similar claims and wondered if you might take a look at the details. I just want to make sure Quinnie gets a fair settlement."

LeRoy looked at the letters from the insurance company. They had settled a fair amount for Quinn's car and all her hospital bills had been paid to date. There was a sum of money set aside for future medical bills and an amount of compensation for her injury and subsequent disability.

"For the most part it's pretty fair, all the medical expenses to date and compensation for the car are standard. The amount to be paid for Quinn's paralysis is outlined in the policy, however, I would push them for more. There are two amounts you should challenge significantly though. The first is the compensation for the emotional suffering Quinn has gone through. The amount offered is pitiful and usually a cheap opening offer. The one that most concerns me most, however, is how much they have offered as potential loss of earnings."

Rachel took Quinn's hand and squeezed it. She knew this must be pretty hard to hear.

"Quinn, I am not sure what future career you were hoping for, but I am sure that whatever you decide to do, your original earning potential has suffered. It's not easy to hear this I know, but the statistics for employment when you have a disability don't make good reading despite anti-discrimination laws."

"I … er haven't entirely decided on a major but I was thinking about Theatre Studies," Quinn looked at her mom.

"So I take it you were thinking about acting as a career?"

"I enjoy performing in drama, dance and singing of course, obviously I don't have the voice Rachel does, but I am just as much a drama queen." Quinn smiled.

"I am not sure we can assign a monetary value to that, just because work in performing arts is notoriously difficult to predict in terms of regular income and of course you are too young to have an employment history to go on, but we can still play an angle here. Whatever your chances of gaining work were before your injury, your options are going to be limited as a result."

"I guess I risk being typecast as the one in the wheelchair," she shrugged and gave LeRoy a wry smile.

He looked up and returned her grin. "Well exactly. I'm sorry this isn't the most optimistic of conversations Quinn. You need to remember that it's not about you personally. I know that Rachel thinks you are amazing, she tells us all the time, and to try and put a dollar sign next to your worth seems a little heartless and inhuman. That said, you are innocent of blame and the consequences could last a lifetime. You have to view the settlement as something that will be there throughout the rest of your life to protect you against the possibility of unemployment, the cost of a new car or wheelchair, adaptations to the houses or apartments you live in and so on."

"I understand," she replied. Serious for a moment, she continued. "I didn't think about how difficult it might be to get work in performing arts because of the chair. It never stopped Artie performing in Glee and this is all so new… I guess I'm just starting to understand the consequences."

"I don't know if you've thought about this as well, Yale is one of our oldest universities and I had a look today at the accessibility of their campus. It is accessible for the most part, but you might want visit as early as possible to check it out. My feeling is that you might want to reconsider somewhere with a more readily accessible campus. If you check out the access map online some of the buildings you would want to use are not what I would describe as wheelchair friendly."

Quinn looked a little shell-shocked. She had spoken to the university admissions people and they had told her arrangements would be made for accommodation, but she hadn't thought about how easy it would be just to get around from one building to the next.

"If you would like to go for a visit, Quinn, I would be happy to accompany you. Just for some company I mean, not because you couldn't do it alone." Rachel wanted to do anything to help her friend, especially as she was now thinking about how much her own future at NYADA would have been affected had she been injured more seriously.

"That would seem like a sensible thing to do," Judy looked over at her daughter to gage her reaction to the suggestion. She seemed much more open to help if it was disguised as friendship and Rachel was such a sensible girl.

Quinn nodded. "Maybe we could go next weekend? There aren't that many weeks left before Nationals."

"Which brings me to what you would like to do next. You have three choices really. You can accept what they have offered already, I know it looks tempting to begin with, but I would say it's significantly less than you should be looking for. You can go back to your insurance company and negotiate for a better settlement, or if you would like to retain the services of a specialist, I could negotiate on your behalf. Obviously there could be a cost to that, but I would suggest financially, that would be your best option."

"Really?"

"I would only bill you for my time, rather than a percentage that I usually charge and let me tell you, this insurance company will not want this to go to court which is hugely in your favor."

"Why?"

"You are beautiful, intelligent, eighteen, just got accepted to Yale, former cheerleader, completely innocent and in a wheelchair. You have virtually every sympathy vote in your corner. The insurance company wouldn't risk a big payout plus legal expenses. My guess is they'll settle quickly to avoid that."

"This is closer to the sum I think we should be asking for," LeRoy wrote a number down and pushed the notepad towards Quinn. She liked that he was talking to her, not her mom, as if she were a child still. She looked at it, but the number didn't seem real and so she looked up as if to say, this can't be right, but found LeRoy simply nodding in her direction.

"You want to ask for eight million dollars?"

"What?" Rachel choked.

"I think that's reasonable. If your injury had been higher and you needed care for the rest of your life, you could expect a settlement seven or eight times that size, but even so, to accept much less would be a bit of an insult."

Judy went very quiet. "I am so grateful for your help, LeRoy."

"It's my pleasure," LeRoy replied. He didn't want to think about how close they had come to making these kinds of decisions about Rachel as well.

Their thoughts were interrupted by Hiram announcing that dinner was ready. As they tidied away the paperwork, Rachel turned to Quinn and spoke quietly. "I just want you to know that I won't mention this to anyone at all, I promise."

"Thanks," Quinn took her hand and held it for a while. "Thanks for the offer of going to Yale with me as well. I'm not sure what I will do if it's a nightmare to get around. I didn't consider the other offers seriously once I got accepted."


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: I have a large amount of this story written already, like nearly thirty chapters so I am interested in some feedback after posting the first few and letting the story develop. I guess from here on in the deviation from the original storyline increases. I hope readers are enjoying it and forgive me if there are any factual inaccuracies. I either write what I know about or do my research, but if you find an obvious error, let me know. I will try and keep up fairly regular updates from here on in.**

Disclaimer: I still own nothing

Chapter 6

The upcoming weekend saw the Glee club enjoying their senior prom. It didn't surprise anyone that Finn got elected prom king, but Rachel winning prom queen surprised Figgins when he read it out. The couple danced in front of everyone as Santana and Quinn sang from the stage. Rachel had a lovely evening. She and Finn hadn't had much time together of late with all the commitments they both had and after the accident, it was such a relief for everyone to be together enjoying themselves, apart from Blaine perhaps, who was struggling without hair gel, which Brit had banned on account of it not having been invented during the dinosaur era!

Rachel was preoccupied for much of the evening wondering if Quinn was enjoying herself. Much of her happiness of late had almost been dependent upon how the other girl was feeling. Rachel hadn't really noticed this herself, but Finn had. To begin with he was understanding. The two had survived a shared experience, which could have killed either one. He also knew that Rachel harbored some guilt about Quinn's injuries being so much worse than her own and that they had been going to their wedding, but still, it was a few months since and surely she was over it now. Truth was, Finn was starting to feel a bit neglected and a little resentful about how much time his fiancé was spending with his former girlfriend, but at the same time felt guilty about that because of Quinn's situation.

It was at some point in the evening as they were dancing that Finn suggested they do something special the following weekend. He was thinking a picnic in the park or a nice meal at Breadstix. Before he could get his idea out Rachel shut him down by explaining her visit to Yale with Quinn the following weekend. Finn wondered why she hadn't told him before and asked as much.

"I just had a busy week getting ready for this evening and preparing for Nationals on top of my already demanding schedule; I just forgot."

Finn stepped back a little. "When did you start forgetting to tell me important stuff like that?"

"I thought you would be working in Burt's shop all day Saturday as normal," she looked surprised.

"What about Sunday? You used to tell me pretty much everything that was going on in your life on a daily basis, actually it was pretty exhausting, but at least I was in the loop."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Rachel caught the dig he made at her.

"Nothing, it's just that I don't really feel like we have spoken that much lately and I never really know what's happening any more. You seem to spend longer on the phone to Quinn than you do with me." He couldn't stop himself.

"Finn, you're being selfish. Quinn needs friends right now and I think it should be me if anyone who is there to get her through the next few months until we leave for college. I don't think you understand just how much her life has been affected by what happened and the implications. You and I have the rest of our future to look forward to unchanged and that's not the case for her now. That could have been me so easily. Don't you get that?"

"Well sure, it sucks to be in the wheelchair and all…"

"That's not it, Finn. You don't get it. It's everything in her life. She will have to have equipment for the rest of her life that costs a lot of money, she won't just be able to live anywhere, she might find it hard to get work. It's only just starting to sink in how difficult some things are going to be and we're not children any more. It's time to grow up."

"Listen, I know about growing up. I'm the one working all hours in the shop to save up for next year and pay for a wedding that should have happened months ago."

Rachel looked a little horrified. "That's all you're thinking about? How much money we wasted on the day I almost died." It was a sudden realization for Rachel that Finn, who with his height and physicality had always seemed so grown up to her, now looked like a sulking schoolboy. Why hadn't she seen it before? How could she possibly have been thinking they were mature enough to get married? She had spent a lot of time thinking lately and the realization that her love for Finn and a drive to settle down and be with him forever wasn't actually the right path anymore just hit her like a slap in the face. "I thought that you were adult enough to realize that the accident has affected me more than just physically, Finn. I'm sorry if you think that it was a waste of money, I'll pay you back whatever it cost you. What it cost me can't be repaid in cents and dollars."

"But you're fine now, Quinn's the one who ended up in the chair." His protest only made Rachel madder. "What did it cost you?"

"How about changing the memory of what should have been the happiest day of my life into a horror story? What about spending days and weeks wondering if I would be okay and then when I knew I would be, living with the guilt over Quinn's injuries being so much worse. How much is that worth, Finn? The same as a wasted buffet or the cost of napkins?" Rachel started to cry and their friends had gathered around realizing something was going down.

"Finn?" Kurt looked distraught at what he'd just heard. His two favorite people besides Blaine in the midst of a full-blown row at their senior prom. "What's going on?" He looked across at Rachel who was visibly upset. Finn's face was bright red.

"Nothing, we just had a disagreement."

"Nothing!" Rachel spat. "You were complaining about losing money because I was lying unconscious in a ditch instead of turning up to the wedding."

"Rachel, no. I didn't mean it like that. Guys, I didn't I swear." Finn tried to explain himself. "I'm sorry." He stepped towards her but she held her hand up.

"Don't," she pleaded. "I need some air," she turned and walked away leaving him open mouthed and confused as hell.

"Rachel!" Kurt called after her, but she ignored his plea and Kurt held him back from going after her.

"Let her go and calm down."

The rest of their group just looked at each other, not really sure what it had been about or what to do next.

Quinn hadn't seen the start of the row, but she had heard her name and seen the end. Santana glanced down at the hazel eyes currently glaring at Finn.

The blonde girl wanted to know what had just gone down. "Why is she so upset Finn? What did you say to her?"

"Nothing, I swear. This is all over nothing."

"Rachel wouldn't be that upset over nothing," she wouldn't release the stare.

"Look I just wanted to do something nice next weekend and she told me she couldn't because she was going to Yale with you and it was the first I heard of it, so I kind of got a bit mad because we have hardly spent any time together of late and I'm listening to myself and realizing what a total jerk I sound like to all of you." His shoulders slumped. "I'm sorry, Quinn. I …I don't mind her going, it was that she didn't tell me earlier and I blew it."

"Classy, Finn. Real classy!" Quinn spun her chair in a neat circle and followed Rachel.

Santana just looked at him with that stare and just muttered one word. "Jackass!"

Kurt pulled Finn away before he could say anything else stupid.

Outside the main doors, Finn stared at his feet and Kurt just watched him. "Aren't you going to say anything?" He asked.

"I don't think I need to," Kurt responded. "I think you already know."

"I think I'm losing her and I don't know what to do about it," his eyes narrowed. "I think I might have lost her the minute that damn truck hit Quinn's car."

"It's not just that you know," Kurt said softly. "We're eighteen. There's a reason eighteen-year-olds don't get married much anymore."

"But I love her," Finn said. "Isn't that enough?"

"Honestly? No." Kurt threaded his arm through the taller man's. "You are a great guy, Finn and maybe in the future, the two of you will realize that your future lies together, but right now, you're both headed in different directions. Rachel is so sure about what she wants and you haven't got a clue. You think that she is your future, but that's not going to be enough for either of you. I'm not saying you should break up, but you can't get married until you reconcile what you both want from each other and your lives outside of each other."

"I know. I've known for a while, but didn't dare let myself say we made a mistake and Rachel's right about me being immature. It's time to man up."

"Rachel?" Quinn shouted down the empty hallway. "Rach, where are you hiding?" She moved further down and heard soft crying from the girls' bathroom. Pushing open the door, Quinn was confronted by a tearful Rachel fanning her face to cool her moist eyes and trying in vain to prevent her mascara from running. "How come we end up like this every year at prom? Crying in the bathroom over a boy."

"I'm sorry if you overheard what he said. He had no right to say those things."

"What are you going to do?" Quinn knew, like everyone else who called Finn and Rachel their friends and regardless of how she felt, that their marrying was a mistake.

"I don't know. I am just so mad at him."

"Isn't that a sign that you care?"

Rachel huffed. She didn't know what she wanted any more, aside from NYADA that is. "I thought that we loved each other so much that it didn't matter we are still so young and I know that to an extent, my dads were relieved we didn't get married, not the circumstances in which that happened though, you understand that right?"

Quinn nodded. "Of course I understand. Can I be honest with you?"

"Please," the brunette turned and gave her the earnest look she always wore in trying circumstances. She dabbed at her eyes.

"I was glad when you didn't go through with the wedding. I want you to be happy Rachel, more than anything, and I wanted to be supportive because I thought getting married was what you wanted, but I always doubted the idea. You are destined for New York and I expect years from now to come and see you bringing down the house in some big Broadway show and it's what you want, but I honestly think Finn would be happier running Burt's shop with a wrench and overalls."

"He could do that in New York, I wouldn't mind what he did so long as he was happy."

"He'd be happier doing it in Lima though, that's the truth. You've heard him say it a thousand times; he doesn't want school to end and that's because he's happy in Lima and he's happier not growing up. Settling down and growing up aren't the same thing."

"I guess," Rachel agreed. "I think I'm going to go home."

Quinn didn't want Rachel to leave like this, not after being voted prom queen. She lifted her right leg off her left so her legs were resting normally in her chair. "Sit," she instructed, pointing at her lap.

Rachel gingerly slid her hips on Quinn's thighs. "Are you sure I'm not too heavy?"

"Please! I'm not fragile and you weight nothing. Besides I can't feel a thing anyway." Quinn gave her a soft smile.

Rachel had become used to her friend making jokes about her legs now. In the beginning it had made her a little uncomfortable, but she realized that it was Quinn's way of dealing with it and letting them know it was okay to talk about her disability. The shorter girl reached her arms around Quinn's shoulders and gave her a hug.

"You know what Artie told me to do when I first came back to school a few weeks ago. Hold my head up and act like there was nothing wrong, fake it until even I believed it myself. That's what you have to do now. You're the prom queen. Get out there and act like you believe it."

Rachel smiled for the first time in a little while. "Okay," she sighed.

A little while later Rachel went back into the gym and sang for everyone before Mercedes finished off the evening with her version of 'I will always love you'. Finn returned sometime during Rachel's singing and as always was mesmerized by her. When her song was over, he approached the stage and held out his hand, which she took and followed him out to the dance floor. As Mercedes started her song, Finn spoke. "I know I just made a total mess of things earlier and I know we have some things to talk about, but I just want one more dance with you this evening."

Rachel nodded and let him lead her round the floor. She already knew what she wanted to do, but she could let herself enjoy one more dance with Finn, so she let him pull her close and rested her cheek on his chest as they swayed to the glorious sound of their friend singing.

Quinn looked over and for a moment a brief pang of jealousy washed over her as she saw Rachel dancing. She so wanted to just be able to dance normally at this point. She needn't have worried. Puck had been watching her as always and saw the look on her face. "Hey babymomma." He didn't ask her permission, just scooped her out of the chair and kicked it backwards so it rolled away and bumped into the stage, before whisking her around. It wasn't like normal slow dancing, but Puck didn't treat her like a china doll either and spun her around making quite a show of it. She squealed a few times, thinking that they were going too fast or that Puck might get dizzy and drop her, but it was fun and she enjoyed it.

Forty eight hours later, Quinn was sat up in bed watching TV when her phone beeped. She read the text from Rachel.

'R U still awake?'

'Yeah'

The phone rang a few moments after Quinn had pressed the send button. "Hi," she answered knowing it was Rachel.

"Sorry its late, I just needed to talk to someone rational."

"And you picked me?" Quinn laughed. "Do you remember my pink hair phase?"

She heard Rachel chuckle on the other end. "I do, pretty spectacular." There was a pause. "I just wanted to let you know that Finn and I have postponed the wedding indefinitely."

"Wow." Quinn didn't really know what to say. "I think it's the right thing to do Rachel, but I am not happy about it. Does that make sense? I couldn't feel happy about something that makes you sad."

"I know. Everyone was right all along. We're just too young."

"You didn't break up did you?"

"No."

"Good, you are a great couple."

"Thanks for all the advice you gave me. Turns out Kurt said pretty much the same thing to Finn, so we were both thinking along the same lines."

"Are you okay?"

"I am. I had a little cry earlier but I had a good talk to my dad's and they helped put things in perspective." She paused briefly. "Well, it's late, so I'll let you get to sleep. Would you like a lift to school tomorrow?"

"Yeah, thanks. Come round for breakfast at seven, Mom would love to see you."

"Okay, thanks. Goodnight."

"Goodnight," Quinn pressed the end button.

The following weekend seemed to arrive quickly, which pleased pretty much everyone on the Glee club, largely because things were a little strained between Finn and Rachel. The pair had told everyone in the choir room about the postponement to a muted but supportive response, but things were still a little off.

Quinn was at her locker on Friday lunchtime, getting ready to leave for one of her physical therapy appointments. She had so far refused to switch to a lower one and reaching up to remove her math textbook, she managed to bring most of the contents down with it.

"Dammit!" She braced herself with her left hand on the frame of her chair so she could reach down with her right hand to start picking things up. Her head was down, so all she could see were a pair of sneakers attached to legs approaching. Before she could pick everything up, Finn's head appeared as he crouched to help her. "I can manage," she said flatly.

"I know, but you have an appointment and I can speed up the process." As Quinn righted herself in the chair, Finn handed everything to her so she could place it in her locker.

"You could ask for a lower one, you know."

"No way. This has always been my locker and I'm keeping it until we graduate."

"Quinn look, about prom. I wanted to apologize."

"What for? Rachel's the one you upset, not me."

"No. I said some things that I shouldn't have and I just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry. Not just for prom, but I'm sorry that this happened to you and it's not fair. I wish I could do something to change this for you because even though we don't feel the same as we used to about each other, I still care about you. You were the first girl I fell in love with." He blushed and the corner of his mouth twitched up. "Anyway, I hope your physical therapy appointment goes well and sorry again for being so irrational. Prom seems to bring out the worst in me."

"Thanks," Quinn closed her locker as he turned to go. "Hey, wait." She cleared her throat. Why did he have to be so tall, it hurt her neck to talk to him these days. "Look I know we've had our fair share of ups and downs, but I care about you too. I'm sorry if Rachel's been distracted lately by what happened to us. I was trying to keep my distance but she's become a really good friend and I could use all the friends I can get right now. For what it's worth, if you had decided to go ahead and get married, despite how much of a mistake I thought it might be, I would still have been there for you both."

"I know," he gave her a sad smile. "Hope everything goes well for your visit to Yale this weekend." With that, Finn turned and walked off.

Quinn went outside to wait for her mom to pick her up. She was quiet and thoughtful as they drove to the hospital. Once there, she changed and went to meet her trainer, who very quickly had her working hard. At the end of her therapy session, she had a meeting with her doctor who seemed thrilled with her progress and how quickly she was adjusting to life in a wheelchair.

"I know things are progressing nicely with your physical therapy and you are seeing the counselor at school, but I would like you to take part in our mentoring scheme. Our mentors are former patients who are able to give you advice and support on a long term basis outside of the hospital environment. I know that they are always appreciated by the people who choose to take part. Do you think this is something you might like to be involved with?"

Quinn shrugged. "I don't know. What does it involve?"

"Nothing formal, we just put you in touch and you can talk on the phone, meet socially, exchange emails, whatever you feel comfortable with. It's just someone who has been in your shoes and learned to deal with it."

"Maybe. I mean I have my friend Artie at school, but I suppose it would be nice to meet someone female. All the others in rehab now are guys and sometimes it would be good to have a girl's point of view."

"That's exactly what we were planning. This is the phone number for a lady called JoAnne. She's an experienced mentor and I think the both of you will get along. She was injured a few years ago when she was in college, like you in a car accident. She's very positive and to be frank, quite inspiring. Call her and meet her, she lives not too far away. Let me know how things have gone next time I see you."


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee

A/N: Thanks for the great feedback. I had a few questions about the direction of the story, but to be honest, i don't want to give anything away and spoil the surprise. Hope those of you who are enjoying it continue to do so.

Chapter 7

LeRoy and Hiram took Quinn and Rachel to the airport the following morning as Judy was working. LeRoy pulled up outside the Fabray home but stayed in the car and let Rachel collect her friend. She rang the bell and a short while later Quinn appeared. Rachel went inside briefly and then came out with Quinn's overnight bag in her hand, allowing Quinn to lock the door and roll down the ramp.

Quinn waved as she rolled up to the car. Rachel was busy opening the trunk to put away the bag and left it open so Quinn's chair could go in there as well. Hiram jumped out to see if Quinn needed help.

"Thanks, but I can manage," she pulled open the rear door and slid into the backseat with ease.

"Well that looked remarkably easier than I thought," Hiram gave her his best grin.

"I'm pretty used to it now," Quinn replied, taking the rear wheels off her chair and handing them to Rachel. She flipped the back of her chair forwards and left that to Hiram to put in the trunk.

At the airport, the process was reversed and the girls were soon on their way. Rachel had both their bags, one over each shoulder. They checked in, where Quinn was asked all sorts of questions like could she walk up steps and board without assistance.

"I can't walk at all, my legs are paralyzed," she explained, flushing a little with embarrassment.

"Then you'll need an aisle chair to board the plane, I'll order one now. Will you stay in your own wheelchair up to the gate?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"I'll just give you a luggage tag for it then," the check-in clerk left her seat and went to the back of Quinn's chair and fastened a red tag to it. "There is a jetway today, so you can get right up to the aircraft door."

Fortunately that was the end of the questions and they could finally say goodbye to Hiram and LeRoy and head towards security. Once they were out of earshot, Quinn confessed how nervous she was.

It wasn't as if she had never flown before, but "It's the first time since the accident," she made the obvious statement.

"What are you worried about?"

"I've heard it's not the most dignified experience if you're in a chair," she quirked her eyebrow.

"Can I just say to you again, how impressive it is that you are doing these things so soon."

Quinn rolled her eyes. "You're not allowed to use the 'B' word until I get back behind the wheel again."

"Oh I see, there are rules?"

"Definitely," the blonde girl replied. "Once I summon up the courage to drive, you can call me brave," she grinned.

Approaching security, they were ushered to the VIP line. "Why are they sending us this way, I know we're not going first class."

"I can't fit through the regular scanner, Rach," Quinn replied.

As they approached the conveyer for their luggage, Quinn was waved forwards by a security officer.

"Good morning, ma'am. I'm just going to search you," she informed her. "Can you hold your arms out to the side."

Quinn did as she was asked while the woman ran her hands along each arm and then over her shoulders and under her ribs. It was a little intrusive and she wasn't too happy about it.

"Can you sit forwards a little so I can just check your back?"

"Not with my arms out to the side, can I put my hands down to support myself?" Quinn asked and the officer nodded. The young woman placed her hands on her knees so she could keep herself from falling forwards while her back was searched. Finally the officer ran her hands over Quinn's hips and down each leg.

"I just need to swab your wheelchair," the woman advised, taking a long plastic handle with a swab on the end.

"What's that for?" Quinn asked.

"Explosives," the officer replied nonchalantly, placing the swab on a machine to check it. "Okay, you're clear to go."

Rachel was already waiting for her, having walked straight through the scanner without the need to be searched. "Gosh, she was very thorough," the brunette noted. "I see what you mean about not being very dignified."

"It's fine. Let's go get a drink."

They moved through to the departure lounge and headed for Starbucks. Quinn ordered raspberry tea and Rachel got a skinny latte. It was always at times like this that Rachel realized just what a difference Quinn's injury made. She couldn't move and hold a drink, it was just not possible. She needed both hands to move. Of course she could get a tray, but then what would happen if the drink tipped over? Rachel found herself profoundly grateful for her own recovery.

"I'll take the bags on my lap, you get the drinks," Quinn was being pragmatic.

Rachel put one bag on top of the other across her friend's knees and Quinn rolled to the nearest free table. She slipped the bags onto a spare chair and then made room for herself by removing another. Rachel followed and put the cardboard cups down carefully.

They sat and chatted, but even though Quinn seemed pretty relaxed, Rachel noticed the stares. People were often pretty unashamed about just staring at Quinn. She had noticed the looks at school in the corridors that Quinn got, but to be honest, Quinn had been stared at for lots of reasons so it didn't really hit home until they left school and went somewhere more public. Then it just became really noticeable.

Lost in thought, Rachel didn't respond when Quinn asked her a question.

"Hey, Rach. Anyone home?" She waved her hand in front of her face.

"Sorry, what were you saying?"

"I asked if you were planning on staying in a dorm next year or renting a place."

"'Kurt and I were thinking of sharing a place," she replied.

"That sounds good, you're both very compatible and of course Finn will get to see you both."

"I guess," Rachel said quietly.

"We had a nice talk yesterday, he apologized for prom."

"He did?"

"I thought you told him to?"

"No," Rachel shook her head. "He did that without being asked." She raised her eyebrows. "I usually have to tell him to do things like that."

Quinn's eyes narrowed. "Has it been hard this week?"

"A little. We haven't spoken much."

"I'm sure everything will work out," Quinn tried to reassure Rachel.

Finished with their drinks and having gone via the bathroom so Quinn in particular could empty her bladder, they made their way to the gate early as requested and when the flight was called, she was ushered forwards straight away and escorted down the jetway. They arrived at the aircraft door and met by a couple of service crew waiting with what Rachel described as a torture device when she saw it.

Quinn looked at the aisle chair and was a little spooked by it. "I haven't used one of these before," she explained to the crew.

"Not a problem. Can you transfer across on your own or do you need a lift?"

"I think I can manage," she replied and proceeded to park her chair alongside. Rachel watched on warily as Quinn slid straight across. The crew lifted her feet into place and then began fastening the belts which strapped her in. There were no push wheels on the chair, only four tiny wheels at each corner, which meant that Quinn was no longer in control.

Once she was secured, Rachel was handed the cushion from Quinn's chair and a crew member whisked the wheelchair away to the hold. Two guys then began to push Quinn into the plane. Fortunately they were quite close to the front and so it only took a minute to squeeze the chair through the narrow aisle. Rachel placed the cushion in Quinn's seat and put their bags away while she was unstrapped again. The armrest on the seat was lifted so Quinn could easily slip into the aircraft seat.

"I hope no one needs the bathroom while we're in the air. How am I going to let anyone out?" She asked slightly confused.

"We'll have to climb over you," Rachel grinned.

"That was possibly one of the worst experiences of my life," she groaned. "It's really embarrassing."

One of the flight attendants had been watching to make sure Quinn was comfortable. "Everyone who has to use it says that," she commented. "You would think they could do better in the twenty first century."

"I'm going to talk to Kurt's dad about this," Rachel said. "Our friend's dad is in congress," she explained to the attendant.

"Good idea," the attendant commented. "Do you need anything?"

Quinn shook her head. "No thanks."

The flight itself was uneventful and they landed a couple of hours later at New Haven's small provincial airport. From there it was a cab ride to the campus. Quinn had instructions to go to the disability resource center and meet someone who would show them round, including an accessible dorm room where they would spend the night.

The two young women found the office and a sophomore student, who like Quinn was sat in a wheelchair.

"Hi, I'm Brian. Welcome to Yale." He gave them a grin as the girls shook hands with him. "I'm going to take you over to the dorm, it's pretty near here, so you can get rid of the bags and then I'll show you around campus. It's pretty big so if there are any areas in particular you want to see, let me know."

Quinn liked the fact that the person showing them around was also in a wheelchair. It helped to know she wouldn't be the only student with a disability.

Brian led them outside and five minutes later they entered a block of buildings around a courtyard. Passing through the center of the paved area, he pointed out where they could get breakfast in the morning. He led them to a ramp which wasn't quite as bad as the steep one at McKinley, but left Quinn blowing a little by the time she got to the top.

"How come you're not even out of breath?" she huffed at the top.

Brian grinned. "I guess I am used to it. I've been in a chair pretty much all my life so …" he shrugged as if that was explanation enough. "How long for you?"

"Three months," Quinn replied with a smile. "So I'm a newbie."

"I guessed it wasn't long," he nodded, pushing the button for the automatic door at the entrance to the building.

"Is it that obvious?" Quinn asked, wondering if her inexperience was showing as she followed behind.

"Don't be offended, but you look normal, just in a chair. You can usually tell if someone has been in a chair since they were very young."

"Oh, I see."

"I was born with spina bifida," he said as if Quinn would know what that was. She thought she might have heard of it but wasn't too sure.

"Car accident," she replied.

"Well it's probably no compensation, but considering how long you've been in a chair, you're pretty good at managing it."

"Thanks," she mumbled.

They made their way along a corridor and Brian used a key from his pocket to open the door to the room the girls would be sharing that night.

"I am in the building next door, so if you need anything later on this evening or tomorrow morning, I'll be around. We'll swap numbers later and you can just call and I'll come over. The super's pretty good too. Her office is just past the entrance so you can always get some help there as well."

Quinn went in the room ahead of Rachel, who dropped their bags on the nearest bed. It was a typical dorm room in most respects, though larger than either expected. It also had an en-suite, which most of the students probably didn't have access to. "This is really nice," Rachel observed.

"Yeah, it looks fine."

Brian gave them a minute to glance around a little more before they headed back out. He tipped on his back wheels to descend the ramp, while Quinn just eased herself down tentatively. She was still a little hesitant to just coast down and controlled her chair with her hands on the wheels.

"So anywhere in particular you would like to see?"

"I guess the social areas would be good, plus I think I might major in Theater Studies, so the areas where that's taught. I will leave the rest to you to decide."

They headed out of the courtyard and carried on along the streets heading towards the north area of the campus. Brian pointed out the theatre and drama block were there. They approached the theatre, which was quite an old building, but instead of going to the front of the building, Brian led them down the side to a fire exit with a ramp. "There are steps at the front so you have to get in here, but it's kept locked so I'll get someone to come and open it." He took out his phone and made a call. They waited at the bottom of the ramp for about ten minutes when a man turned up in a pick-up and gave them a wave. "Be with you in a couple of minutes." He ran up the steps and then shortly after, the fire door was opened from inside.

He held the door for the trio as they made their way into the building. The exit led straight to the front of the auditorium and Quinn was able to see the performance area.

Brian pointed out that there was a platform lift to get on the stage, but that he didn't have the key, so they couldn't go backstage at the moment.

Quinn nodded. "It's fine. At least there's a lift."

Rachel walked up the steps to the stage and had a look around. For once though, she didn't feel at home. Something about Quinn having to enter through a fire exit instead of the front like everyone else seemed wrong. She didn't stay more than a few seconds before walking back down again.

"I thought you might burst into a spontaneous song then for a moment," Quinn raised an eyebrow at Rachel passing up and opportunity.

Rachel blushed. "We're not here for me," she grinned.

They left back out of the side door and continued along the street one more block to the drama building. This was newer, but still had several steps up. The guy in the pick-up was already waiting with a platform lift ready to go. He invited Quinn to roll on and then told her which button to push to operate it. The platform rose up at a gentle pace until it reached the top of the stairs and she was able to roll off. Rachel met her at the top and they waited for Brian to follow. The lift was effective but slow and again it irked Rachel that it wasn't possible to just go straight in like everyone else. They entered the building and once inside everything was straight forward. There was an elevator to move between floors and everything was fairly standard. There were numerous studios some with stages, specialized areas for costume, props, sound and lighting.

Quinn was somewhat relieved, despite the annoying lift out front, inside felt okay and there was very little that was inaccessible. That said, there was something just a little off. It wasn't anything specific. She dismissed it as nerves and it being a new experience.

Once done, they headed outside again and back down the interminable platform lift to continue the tour. Brian was great at showing them the main student gathering places and although he didn't draw too much attention, Quinn did. She had felt that it was probably the chair, but started to get the feeling, surrounded by large numbers of younger people that she was drawing some appreciative glances as well. Unfortunately these were mostly from young men and she just wasn't interested, flattering as it may have been.

Rachel thought it was cute when three guys approached them while they were eating dinner in a bar. They started chatting to the girls and offered to buy them a drink. Rachel would have accepted, for nothing else than boosting her friend's ego as she sensed they were interested in the blonde girl, however, she refused politely and pretty much brushed off what had definitely been an advance. With Brian in tow, Rachel didn't want to say anything, but saved it for later when they were safely back in the dorm.

"So," Rachel's eyes went wide "those guys were cute in the bar, weren't they? If that's the standard of boyfriend material, I think you would have a great time here next year!"

Quinn was just sorting out her purse and turned to see her friend's excitement. She felt a sense of dread talking about this with her, but knew she could fake it. "I guess. I'm just not up to dealing with that right now. Actually I've said goodbye to that part of my life now."

Rachel's mouth fell open. "Quinn, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you by bringing it up."

"It's fine Rachel, but be honest, flirting aside, who's not going to be grossed out by the chair?"

"When I first came to McKinley you were everything I wanted to be, beautiful, talented, popular, head cheerleader."

"How the mighty have fallen," Quinn's voice dripped with self-loathing.

"But don't you see, that's still how I see you. The new Quinn is decidedly less bitchy and as well as beautiful, you are now humble and inspiring. The best thing about my whole time in high school has been finding a way to be your friend."

It was Quinn's turn to stare open-mouthed now.

Rachel added, "Someone special will see that and not the wheelchair, Quinn."

The blonde girl didn't respond but took in the words. Rachel headed for the bathroom where her extensive beauty regime would take a while, but she left the door open. Quinn unpacked her bag, pulling out her PJs and washbag.

"So let me ask you a hypothetical question," Quinn rolled into the bathroom as Rachel stood at the basin, hair swept off her face with a headband, removing her makeup. "Imagine you were a guy and attracted to me, do you think you could ignore the wheelchair? And by that I don't just mean the chair itself, I mean the whole being paralyzed, having people stare at you, all the complications. You pretty much know by now what they are so…" she shrugged and used a cleansing wipe to start removing her own make-up.

Rachel, who often over-thought and allowed all of the over-thinking out of her mouth, was briefly quiet. She dried her face and put the towel round her neck. "I think that if I loved someone enough, those things wouldn't matter to me. I wouldn't let people staring bother me, it's a little disconcerting sometimes I admit and I want to tell them to stop it, but I know it would probably make you embarrassed, so I don't. If you were happy with your life, I wouldn't mind that you were paralyzed either. I mean, I would wish for you that you weren't but I wouldn't see you as less attractive because of it. I don't really know too much about the complications apart from what I read about on the internet, but I don't think any of it would be a deal-breaker. I mean, I read that women can still have children with a spinal cord injury so I would definitely not be put off, but I probably shouldn't have mentioned babies, sorry. Is that sort of what you were after?"

As usual, Rachel's response had followed her rambling thought process and she hoped she hadn't put her foot in it.

Quinn laughed. "I should have expected your answer to be thorough, Rach."

The conversation ended briefly as they both brushed their teeth.

"If you want some privacy to change, I can wait in here," Rachel suggested.

"I told you before, I don't really have much dignity left these days," Quinn shrugged. "I do need to empty my bladder though and no offence, I love you dearly, but you don't need to see that."

Rachel gave her a soft smile of understanding. "I'll leave you alone then," she said, walking out with her enormous washbag and closing the door gently behind her.

Fifteen minutes later, Quinn emerged from the en-suite and dropped her bag on the floor. Rachel watched and just assumed that if she needed any help, Quinn would ask for it. The former cheerleader slipped from her chair to sit on the bed. Taking her top off and then her bra, replacing them with a T-shirt. She then lifted her legs up onto the mattress and removed her shoes, followed by her jeans so she could put on the shorts that went with the PJ top. Quinn settled herself on the bed and then walked her hands down alongside her legs until she was doubled over. She stayed like that for a couple of minutes, stretching out her lower back, which was stiff from sitting all day. When she was done, she pushed her upper body back until she was sitting, then dropped one leg over the other so she could roll over onto her stomach. This time she pushed her arms into a press-up to ease the kink in the other direction. When she was feeling a little more loose, she just lay back down on her tummy, not saying anything immediately, but Rachel sensed she wanted to ask something.

"Are you comfortable over there?" the brunette asked.

"Yeah," her friend looked over with an apprehensive glance. "I was wondering, would you mind helping stretch my legs? I'm supposed to do it every day and it's easier if someone gives me a hand. Normally Mom helps out."

"Of course, I'd be happy to help." Rachel rolled up out of bed and came to sit beside Quinn. "What do you need me to do?"

Quinn if she was honest with herself, felt just a little guilty at what she had just asked. She knew she was actually going to enjoy the other girl touching her, even if she couldn't feel most of it. "Can you bend my leg to stretch my thigh? My foot needs to be brought right up to my butt and I can't reach when I'm on my front."

Rachel gently picked up Quinn's foot and raised it as she asked. Even though Quinn couldn't feel her legs at all, she could sense the pulling in her torso and knew Rachel was being very careful.

"I'm not fragile, Rach. You can go a bit more forcefully."

"Oh, okay. I just didn't want to hurt you."

"It's fine honestly."

Rachel pressed a little harder and picked up the speed. "How many times for each leg?"

"Maybe ten," Quinn responded.

Rachel switched legs and did as she was asked. "I remember having this done in the hospital after the accident," she said quietly, as much to herself as to her paraplegic friend.

Quinn glanced back sensing Rachel had finished and saw both legs were laid out on the bed. She wriggled her elbows under her body and levered her upper body around. Her legs, unable to move, simply rotated with momentum so she finished with them lying tangled. Rachel didn't wait to be asked and simply lifted them off one another and straightened them.

"Thanks, I appreciate you doing this for me."

"What's next?"

"Are you sure?"

"Of course."

"Okay, then hamstring stretch. Lift my left leg right up at the hip, keeping my knee straight. You might need to hold my right leg down by hooking your leg over it."

"This is not very dignified is it?" Rachel chuckled as she knelt in position and lifted Quinn's whole leg in the air. Her legs were getting very thin already as her muscles began to waste away, but yet it was heavy to lift because it was a dead weight; Quinn literally had no movement in the leg at all. Rachel pushed from the calf, making sure to hold the leg straight and found Quinn's hands pulling her own thigh as well, to add more force to the stretch.

"My hips get really tight from sitting all day," Quinn grimaced.

"Can you feel that?" Rachel wondered.

"Just in the top of my hips," she replied through clenched teeth. "Push harder, it relieves the cramp."

Rachel carried on for a few minutes then they repeated it on the right leg.

"Thanks," Quinn's face was a picture of relaxation after Rachel placed her leg back down. The blonde girl pushed herself upright and her friend sat back on the bottom of the bed watching her massage her feet and ankles. "The bottom of my back and hips feel so much better."

"I'm glad I could be of some help," Rachel smiled.

"Sing something relaxing while I finish up," Quinn made the request. She loved Rachel's voice. It was just stunning. The first time she heard it, she tried to hate it, because Rachel was such a geek, but it just warmed her up inside.

Rachel thought for a moment then just began to sing.

"In the wee small hours of the morning,

While the whole wide world is fast asleep,

I lie awake and think about the boy

And never, ever think of counting sheep."

Quinn started to join in as she stretched her wrists and elbows. The mix of Rachel's clear, pitch perfect diction and Quinn smooth alto was dreamy.

Rachel figured, rightly that Quinn's shoulders were probably tired as well, bearing in mind how much distance they had covered that day, so she walked around the bed and slipped behind the other girl, working her hands into the nape of her neck and across the top of her shoulders.

"When your lonely heart has learned its lesson,

You'd be his if only he'd call,

In the wee small hours of the morning,

That's the time you miss him most,

Of all."

Rachel didn't stop after they finished singing. She could sense the tension in Quinn's upper body, compared to the lack of it in her legs.

"I know you don't need me to tell you this, but your voice is amazing, Rach."

"Thank you, whilst my pitch and diction are near perfect, your voice has a wonderful warmth to it. I always think you should sing more solos."

"Hey, I would but, and please don't take this the wrong way, between the three diva's in Glee, it doesn't give the rest of us much to fight over. Besides I was a better dancer than a singer anyway." Quinn dropped her arms in her lap.

Rachel wrapped her own arms around Quinn and squeezed. "I'm so sorry, Quinn."

"I'm okay. It's just going to take me a while to forget what I used to be able to do."

"Don't say that." Rachel begged. "You should always be proud of what you were and what you are now."

"You spend a lot of time trying to improve my self-esteem, you know. Considering what a self-obsessed bitch I used to be, I can't believe I need it and it's you giving it to me."

"You spend a lot of time running yourself down these days."

"I guess I do. It's just hard not to think about the things I've lost."

"You know what you haven't lost? Your friends. And your brain, don't forget that."

Quinn smiled. Rachel was hopelessly and unashamedly optimistic.

"I've been thinking about today and I have to be honest with myself. I'm not feeling that optimistic about coming here, which is frustrating because I had my heart set on Ivy League. I thought I would fit right in, but something has been missing all day and I can't put my finger on what it is, but it just doesn't feel like the place I am supposed to spend the next few years. Maybe the old me would have loved it, but I think I might have made a mistake."

Rachel moved out from behind Quinn and let her friend shuffle back into the pillows. "Do you know what I didn't like? The way you have to keep going round the back or the side to get in everywhere. How come the front entrances aren't more accessible?"

"I guess it's just because the buildings are old in many cases. I felt that too though. Maybe that's why it feels off."

"What are you going to do?"

"I had an offer from a few other schools, so I guess I'll take a look at them," she shrugged. "Maybe one of them will feel right."

"Where else is on the list?"

"My number two choice was Columbia. I didn't actually turn them down. I was going to because Yale offered me a place, but then the accident…"

"Oh my gosh, New York!" Rachel squealed. "That would be awesome if you were there too."

"I knew you would get all excited if I mentioned it."

"We would both be on Broadway, just at opposite ends," Rachel had gone all dreamy on her with thoughts of New York. "Remember the trip to Nationals and we all danced around that fountain?" she grinned.

Quinn groaned. "Don't mention that time. That was the height of my craziness, actually it wasn't quite, the pink hair was the…" she paused again, "no trying to set Shelby up was definitely the worst I got. I think I am more sane now than I've ever been. How ridiculous is that?" She started giggling at the thought of all the craziness that she had gone through in the last four years.

Rachel couldn't help but join in whenever Quinn laughed. It was such a rarity to see her show anything other than that enigmatic smile she would put on to hide her true feelings. "It's good to see you laugh."


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

"Miss Pilsbury, do you have a few minutes?"

Emma looked up from her desk to see Quinn Fabray in the doorway. "Of course," she moved quickly to shift one of the chairs out of the way so Quinn`s chair would fit in. "How can I help?" Emma was desperate to do anything to support Quinn. The girl had so many ups and downs during her time at school but it was only really since the accident that the teenager had been willing to approach her with her true feelings.

"I decided not to go to Yale."

"I'm sorry things didn't work out well. Can I ask why?"

Quinn sighed and then told her about the experience at the weekend.

"Well I can understand you wouldn't want to go if you aren't comfortable there. So what is your back-up plan?"

"I have offers from Columbia, who offered me a full scholarship based on my grades and Berkeley. That's why I wanted to talk to you. I really need an unbiased opinion when I visit Columbia so I can't take Rachel or Santana, they both love New York and they're just going to want me to go for that reason alone. I know this is a huge imposition, but I wondered if perhaps you might be willing to visit it with me."

Emma was surprised. In the time she had been at the school, Quinn had rarely asked for help. "Well, I am supposed to be spending the weekend with Will, but I know he won't mind for something like this.

"I understand if it's too much of an imposition, but if you don't mind there's an early flight out and late flight back on Saturday."

Emma was very impressed by the way Quinn handled herself during the flight out. They took a cab from LaGuardia to Columbia and were dropped off by the theatre entrance on Broadway. A security guard at the gate on College Walk was expecting them and escorted them to the elevator that took them to the Upper Campus.

"You get your own key to use it so you won't need an escort each day," the guard informed Quinn as she swiped a card through the reader. "Just hand this back to security when you leave, it allows access to any of the secure elevators but you don't need it for most." She handed it over to Quinn. "Third floor is what you need for Upper Campus, just go straight ahead when the doors open."

They followed the guard's instructions and were soon exiting into the upper level of the university grounds.

"Well that was easy," Emma commented after the details Quinn had mentioned about Yale.

A member of staff took them to see the accommodation available, which had just been renovated and looked impressive. But better still was Dodge Hall, where her tuition would be and the theatre, where both had smooth, step-free entry so she could go straight in the door the same as anyone else.

Even out on the streets, Quinn felt like she didn't stick out so much in her chair. It just seemed as though the mix of people was much more eclectic and less stereotypically Ivy League.

Emma sensed Quinn was feeling a good vibe and raised it with her when they went to a coffee house late that afternoon.

"You seem quite relaxed about being here. Do I sense this might be the one?"

Quinn smiled and nodded. "If I was still the person I used to be when I first went to McKinley, Yale would have been the place for me, no doubt. But I have changed and I now know that I would be much happier in a place where the people are from all sorts of societal groups. Maybe I spent too much time with the Glee club," she laughed.

"And what about the fact that some of your friends will be here as well?"

"It would be nice to think that I could be totally independent by the time college starts but I need to be realistic; there are going to be times I could use some help and knowing Rachel will be here in particular is great."

"The two of you have become good friends, I know."

Quinn nodded thoughtfully. "Who would have guessed?"

"She cares about you a great deal."

"Part of me still feels I don't deserve her friendship; I treated her so badly."

"I know," Emma had spent a good deal of Rachel's sophomore year counseling her.

"She talked to you about it I guess." Quinn didn't pry any further, knowing it would be confidential. "She's the reason I became a better person."

"I know that too; so does Rachel."

"She does?"

Emma smiled. "Rachel told me a while ago, just after your accident, that she was finding it difficult to reconcile what happened because you had become so much nicer, you didn't deserve to be punished for the rest of your life."

Quinn stared into her cup of iced tea. "I wish I hadn't said it to her now, but I was in a bad place when I suggested that God might be punishing me for the things I did wrong in the past."

"Oh, Quinn. You don't really believe that do you?"

"No, it was just an accident. But when a doctor comes in your room and tells you you'll never walk again, it's inevitable that you start wondering why."

Emma instinctively reached out and took Quinn's hand. Quinn looked up and gave her a vulnerable smile before continuing. "I just need to know that Rachel's okay. If she is, then I'll be fine."

Emma wondered in that brief moment about Quinn's relationship with the other girl; there was something about the way she attached her own happiness to Rachel's.

"Rachel's good," Emma squeezed her hand, "and she will be thrilled you will be here next year."

Rachel was more than thrilled, she was ecstatic when Quinn told her. As always, getting ahead of herself, she immediately suggested they look to share accommodation with Kurt and possibly Santana as well who was talking about going to the Big Apple instead of Louisville.

"Rach, don't be offended but I think I am going to stay on campus at least for my first year."

"But why? We could have a great time sharing."

"I know, but I've not been in the chair that long and I'm not used to dealing with public transport. I think it would be best to start off close by so I'm not spending too much time travelling when it takes me a while to get ready each day still. Maybe when I get more used to this I'll live off campus with you guys. We can still see each other all the time."

Rachel could see the sense of it. "Okay, but you promise we'll see you at least once a week?"

"At least," Quinn promised.

"I can go to Nationals now and relax knowing that you are settled on a plan for next year."

"I can confess to you that I'm worried about Nationals. I just don't feel confident in performing in front of an audience yet."

Rachel had spent plenty of Glee rehearsals encouraging her friend and was at a loss about how to help.

"Quinn," Mr Schue's voice resonated in the corridor as she was at her locker.

"Hey, Mr Schue."

"Do you have few minutes? I want to talk to you about Nationals."

Quinn was relieved to talk about it. She just didn't want to be on stage drawing attention to herself for all the wrong reasons.

They went into the choir room and Mr Schue took a seat on the piano stool so they could talk comfortably. "Rachel came to see me because she said you were still worried about Nationals."

Quinn sighed. "She doesn't understand how it feels when everyone is staring at the chair and I miss dancing, I was good at it. I just feel useless."

Will looked pained at hearing that. "Quinn, you're not useless. Far from it."

"You say that Mr Schue, but none of you understand, not really. Not even Artie gets how I feel. He's confident in using his chair and he's more mobile than I am. I always feel like I might tip or slide out if I move too much; I can't even tell where the lower half of my body is unless I look at it." Her voice fell quiet as she spoke the last words. "We have a great chance of winning but I never had the voice the other girls do and now I can't dance either. After ruining Rachel's wedding, I couldn't forgive myself if I cost us a National title as well."

Will's head dropped. She was right, none of them understood how hard it was for her to get used to everything in such a short space of time. "Quinn, no one is going to blame you if we don't win. But I know they would hate to win without you. I know why you joined Glee in the first place, but I also know this is the only place you've really belonged since then and you're part of this team. We've never been conventional so no one in the audience is going to expect anything different." He took a deep breath and told her what he wanted. "I want you and Rachel to sing a duet. I found the perfect song and after what you have both been through..."

"I can't," she shook her head.

"You can do this. You and Sam won us Regionals last year. Rachel loves the idea."

"Rachel would. I'm just not ready for this."

"You and Rachel have voices that blend beautifully together, remember 'Pretty/Unpretty?" She still didn't look convinced. "Quinn, look at me for a second." A pair of pained hazel eyes met his steady gaze. "You are going to college to study theatre. You love performing. Sooner or later you are going to have to get used to the audience again."

"I know. It's not that I don't want to perform ever again, it's just so soon and I don't feel like I can do justice to the team; I just don't want to let everyone down."

"You won't. I guarantee it. Will you just trust me for now and go to the auditorium after school."

"Okay," she sighed.

Quinn was apprehensive all afternoon until the bell rang to signal the end of Chemistry. Rachel had been chatting all lesson and neither of them had done any work; they had both passed their credits weeks ago anyway.

They went via the lockers and then to the auditorium. Mr Schue was waiting along with the rest of the club. "Puck you have the floor," he said after a quick head count.

"So Quinn," he avoided the usual baby momma nickname. "We know the last few months have kind of been hard for you and all, so we got to thinking and asked a bunch of people to help us out. We know that your mom has had to shell out for a bunch of stuff and so we wanted to do this ourselves and we got you this," he looked over to Finn who moved out from the back pushing a wheelchair. "It's a special dance wheelchair and we checked with your therapist who sorted it all out and it took a few weeks to get here, sorry we couldn't get it any quicker." Puck was looking expectantly at her, but Quinn's face was unreadable at that moment. "Say something before we all explode."

She stared at it for a while, but couldn't speak her thoughts.

"It's kinda cool actually," Finn said, sensing Quinn wasn't ready to speak yet. "It has straps so you don't need to worry about falling out and the wheels are angled so you can turn quickly." He looked over at Puck who just raised his eyebrows, clearly at a loss. "We just want you to feel like you belong on that stage with us and we thought this would help."

Quinn couldn't speak because she was crying. It took her a minute or so to get a hold of her emotions. "Ugh," she wiped her eyes. "I promised myself I was going to stop bursting into tears all the time!" A smile spread across her lips.

A look of relief washed over everyone.

"I can't believe that you guys did this. How did you get the money, they cost like three grand."

"We had some donations from our parents and faculty, plus we all chipped in. We didn't just do it for Nationals, you can take it with you next year and wow all the frat boys with your new dance moves." Puck was grinning.

"Burt says he wants to protect his investment so you have to take it to the tire shop for a service every once in a while." Finn added.

Artie rolled up to the chair and nodded at it. "Time for some dance lessons, Miss Fabray?"

Quinn rolled her eyes and sniffed. "Okay, let's get started."

Everyone cheered as Quinn slipped from her regular chair to the new one. Puck helped her fasten the Velcro straps, one around her hips and the other across her knees. "Try to tip out," he suggested.

Quinn leaned forwards as far as she could, but the straps held tight and she had to push herself back with her hands. "I don't think it's possible." She grinned at him. "This was all your doing wasn't it?"

He shrugged. "I'd love to take credit for the idea, but it was my Jewbabe, Berry who thought it up. I just got the cash together."

The week flew by with constant rehearsals during the day and then in the evening Rachel would arrive at the Fabray home to practice the duet. Quinn was exhausted but also feeling better about the whole performance. She and Artie worked constantly on the routines, ensuring that each turn was smooth and looked effortless. In the new chair, she felt able to move without the fear of taking a tumble and ruining the plan.

Their final rehearsal was in front of the faculty and most of the senior class. The auditorium was fairly full and the nerves were jangling backstage. Mr Schue came into the dressing room and wished everyone good luck, but as they were about to go on, he walked up behind Quinn and squeezed her shoulders. "Enjoy this, everyone is on your side." He left them to sit beside Emma in the audience.

"Is everyone alright?"

"By everyone, do you mean Quinn?" Emma nodded. "She's as ready as she's going to be. Keep your fingers crossed."

Neither Emma nor Will need have worried. The opening number was a smash and from there the adrenalin took over. By the time Rachel and Quinn finished their duet virtually the entire audience were on the verge of tears.

Boarding the bus to Nationals was entertaining. Quinn and Artie were loaded via the ramp first and were parked beside each other while the rest piled on board around them. Rachel and Tina were belting out 'What a Feeling' and the rest joined in, even Coaches Sue and Beiste. The singing continued for some time until eventually everyone fell quiet and some started sleeping. Quinn was trying hard not to fall asleep in her chair. They had a rest stop and by the time everyone was back on board she could hardly keep her eyes open. Santana noticed first and shook her shoulder gently.

"You need to lie down?"

Quinn's eyes fluttered and she nodded. Santana leaned over and lifted her onto the nearest seat, chasing Sam and Mercedes back a few rows. Santana dropped down on the seat, turned her back to the window and pulled Quinn back so she could lean against her. "You don't need to worry about falling, I got you. Go to sleep." Quinn relaxed into her friend and was gone in minutes; the hectic schedule of the penultimate week of high school had taken its toll.

A few hours later they arrived at their hotel and the weary group made their way to their rooms. Santana and Brittany were not allowed to share so the Latina girl joined Rachel and Quinn. All three were exhausted, but Quinn was barely awake as she was helped off the bus. When they got to the room, the blonde girl struggled into the bathroom to empty her bladder and then didn't even bother to undress, shifting across to the bed and dropping off to sleep immediately.

The other two readied themselves quickly and whispered to each other for a short while before turning out the lights.

Quinn had no time to worry about anything once the lights went up. She hadn't been in the Troubletones, not after her behavior earlier in the year, but the girls had insisted and so she helped belt out 'Edge of Glory' as the opening number. The biggest cheer went up when Brit ran off the second step and vaulted off Quinn's shoulders in a huge straddle jump. The boys dominated the next song, 'Dashboard Light', leaving the duet to finish.

"Ladies and gentlemen, before we sing our final number we would just like to say a few words." Rachel's voice didn't sound as confident speaking as it did singing. "Four months ago, on the day we won our Regional competition, my teammate Quinn and I were involved in car accident which almost cost us our lives." Rachel made the mistake of looking at Quinn and her voice broke. She just couldn't get the rest of the words out.

"As you can see, Rachel made a full recovery," Quinn's rich voice spoke into the microphone calmly but her words were full of emotion. "I wasn't so lucky and suffered a spinal cord injury which left me paralyzed from my hips down. I didn't think for a moment that I would be ready to be here today to participate and I have so many people to thank for helping me, including my fellow teammates." She waved to them all behind. "Our friends from the Dalton Academy Warblers suggested collecting donations for the American Spinal Injuries Association during the performance, so look out for the navy blue blazers at the end of the aisles. We thank them and you for the support."

A huge round of applause followed Quinn's speech and Rachel threw her a grateful look for having been able to finish it.

They were separated by about ten feet at the front of the stage as a spotlight hit Quinn just after the intro to the Nina Simone classic.

"I wish I knew how

It would feel to be free

I wish I could break

All the chains holding me

I wish I could say

All the things that I should say

Say 'em loud say 'em clear

For the whole round world to hear"

Rachel looked across at Quinn as her rich alto had everyone silent. The image of the stunningly beautiful blonde girl sitting proudly in her wheelchair made the collective hearts of the audience melt. She breathed in deeply as she prepared to join in the next verse.

"I wish I could share

All the love that's in my heart

Remove all the bars

That keep us apart

I wish you could know

What it means to be me

Then you'd see and agree

That everyone should be free"

Mercedes led the rest of the New Directions on from the wings in support adding harmony to the two strong voices at the front.

"I wish I could give

All I'm longin' to give

I wish I could live

Like I'm longin' to live

I wish I could do

All the things that I can do

And though I'm way over due

I'll be starting anew"

Rachel and Quinn moved together and wrapped an arm around one another. The others slowly moved forward to join them in a line across the stage. The New Directions all clapped their hands in the air with the beat and had the audience soon on their feet, joining in.

"Well I wish I could be

Like a bird in the sky

How sweet it would be

If I found I could fly

Well I'd soar to the sun

And look down at the sea

Than I'd sing cos I know - yeah

Then I'd sing cos I know - yeah

Then I'd sing cos I know

I'd know how it feels

Oh I know how it feels to be free

Yeah Yeah! Oh, I know how it feels

Yes I know

Oh, I know

How it feels

How it feels

To be free"

The eruption from the crowd was deafening as they bowed.

The New Directions were huddled together as the results were announced. They were all thinking that Vocal Adrenalin had smashed it, but hoped that their emotion had shown through. It certainly did a few moments later when the announcer gave the news; New Directions had won.


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee

Chapter 9

The return to school saw banners and streamers, everyone out in the hallways, cheers and cups of confetti rather than slushies being thrown. To say the New Directions members were shocked was a huge understatement. After the years of torment over their extra-curricular singing, winning at Nationals had finally redressed the balance in their favor.

The group met at lunch in the choir room to plan their performance at a special assembly that afternoon. Figgins had asked them to perform and present the Teacher of the Year Award afterwards. "We need to sing something victorious," Finn threw the idea out there for the rest to suggest songs.

Spontaneous arguments broke out among them, each suggesting their own ideas, until finally Puck came up with the perfect idea. They spent the rest of lunch practicing and then went to the auditorium for a final run through, before everyone took their seats in the audience.

Figgins introduced them and Finn took the lead in 'We Are The Champions' to the delight of all those watching who joined in the chorus. The noise was deafening. Rachel joined him and between them, they sang their hearts out, only to be joined by the rest of them. Quinn took note that as she sang her part a huge cheer went up from the audience, causing her to blush. When the song ended Finn and Rachel made the speech that they had written earlier for the award to Mr Schue. He eventually made his way to the stage and hugged each of them before collecting the award. It was the best ending to the best day in their school lives.

The final week was strange. For all the seniors, it was their final few classes and only those who were still short of credits were doing any work, the rest were just using the time to socialize with their friends for the last time. Of the seniors in Glee, Brittany and Puck were short of what they needed to graduate, but Brit was so far off there was no rescuing her and she was doomed to repeat the year. Puck needed only one more pass. He had screwed up European Geography once already and thought he'd blown his last chance to graduate with everyone else. Quinn felt bad for him, he had put himself out repeatedly for her since the accident and now he was in trouble. The boys had already tried and failed to help him revise for the test, but Quinn wasn't going to let him fail if she could do something to help. For the first time since she had been injured, Quinn decided she was going to use it as a means to help Puck.

"Can I help you Miss Fabray?" Mrs Doosenbery asked the blonde girl hovering in the doorway to her room.

"Yes, Ma'am. I wanted to speak to you about Puck."

Mrs Doosenbery sighed. "What has he done now?"

"Nothing," she rolled further into the room. "I just wanted to ask you if you could reconsider allowing him to re-sit his test. Before you say no, please let me explain why I am asking."

She sighed and nodded. "Go ahead."

"I know he's a screw-up sometimes, but he's also a good guy and he has spent a lot of the last three months helping me cope after the accident. I know that this has distracted him from studying. He will admit that he should have worked harder before now, but I'm begging you to please let him try again. I already have a ruined wedding on my conscience and I don't know if I can cope with Puck not graduating in addition. I would have been in a deep, dark hole if it wasn't for him. You know how much effort he put into raising money for the wheelchair I used to perform in at Nationals, please give him a chance at graduating."

Quinn wondered if she had laid it on too thick, but Mrs Doosenbery's face softened.

"I can't imagine how hard it must have been for you to adjust after your injury and I know why you and Puck are close. I imagine he has been very upset about what happened to you."

"He wouldn't admit it to most people but it's been very distressing for him." Quinn wasn't lying. She knew Puck was gutted about her injury.

"I'll give him one more chance to pass. He can sit the paper on Thursday morning."

"Thank you so much, Ma'am. I'll go tell him now."

"Tell him to study while you're at it."

"I'll do better than that, I'm going to help him pass."

Quinn did exactly that. She ignored her mother's concerns about Puck being in the house and made him go over every night after school to cram. By Wednesday evening his brain was fried and he was despairing about the test.

"Relax, you got this. The Puckerman I slept with wouldn't be defeatist about a stupid Geography exam."

"Why did you sleep with a loser like me?"

"You're not a loser, but you have lost your swagger."

"That's probably a good thing."

"No you need to get it back and I think I know how," she looked earnestly at him. "Kiss me," she ordered.

"Quinn, we've been down this road and it didn't end well."

"I'm not talking about sex, trust me. Just kiss me like it's the last kiss you're ever going to get."

Puck's gaze found deep hazel eyes looking straight at him, trusting him. He thought about just leaning in and kissing her, but the damn chair was in the way as always. He leaned over to lift her out of the chair, slipping a hand under her knees and the other around her back. She snaked her arm around his neck and offered no resistance as he pulled her up into his grasp and then sat down on her bed. They looked at each other and lips met.

Puck felt the sparks fly, igniting his mojo. He didn't care that Quinn's legs didn't work anymore, she was still the most gorgeous creature in Lima bar none and the following morning when he walked into the exam, he knew the kiss had given him his confidence back.

Finn paced, so did Puck. Mercedes drummed her fingers on the lockers outside Mrs Doosenbery's room. Quinn couldn't pace so she rocked back and forth instead, occasionally popping a wheelie as she realized she was driving herself nuts with the rocking.

Eventually Mrs D came out but before she could say a word Puck snatched the paper from her hands. He held it to his chest while they all stared at him, eyes wide. He lifted the paper and stared at the grade circled in red.

"I got a C-, that's a Puckerman A! I'm graduating!"

They jumped on him in complete ecstasy. Puck hugged each of them in turn, saving Quinn for last. "Couldn't have done it without you," he muttered, then grabbed her up in the air and swung her round before depositing her unceremoniously back in her chair.

She sat in the wings waiting. Puck and Finn had accompanied the ceremony with 'Glory Days' as the other seniors received their diplomas. Figgins made his final announcement and she sucked in a deep breath.

"McKinley seniors, give it up for your Valedictorian, Quinn Fabray!" She rolled out on stage to a massive cheer, followed by Rachel and Santana breaking rank and giving her a hug before collecting her scroll from Miss Pilsbury. There was a brief moment of panic as Emma realized the microphone on the lectern was way too high for Quinn to use, but Finn saved the day running over with his radio mike and giving her a squeeze before retreating to the group behind.

Quinn looked out and saw her Mom. Giving her a nervous smile, she started. "When I first came to McKinley, I thought the most important thing was to be popular. You see I wasn't when I was in elementary school and suffered for it. Before I came here I dyed my hair blonde, got a nose job, lost weight and became a cheerleader. I should have been happy, but I wasn't because I also became a bully. Strangely the only time I was really happy was performing in Glee club, which I hadn't really wanted to do in the beginning. It was the only time I felt I was being myself." The audience were silent. "Despite the constant taunting and put-downs some of my fellow Glee members received, they kept going and never let a slushy in the face stop them or change them. Neither did they judge anyone for being an individual and despite the way I treated some of them, when I got into trouble, they were nothing but supportive." Quinn turned and looked at Rachel, who was smiling proudly at her. "It took me a while to recognize the error of my ways, but I did and became determined to change again, only this time into a better person. I hoped that I would get the opportunity to pay back some of the debt I felt to the people who became my friends. But life is not predictable. It is full of twists and turns and my plan didn't work out so well." She took a deep breath to steel herself. "In February my life changed forever. I went from being a cheerleader to a paraplegic facing the rest of my life in a wheelchair in the blink of an eye." Tears had started to flow by this time, mostly from the audience. Quinn saw Carol and Burt holding her Mom in the audience. "Instead of paying back a debt, I owe more now than ever before to those people who saw more in me than I ever saw in myself and somehow, despite the craziness of this year, I managed to finish with the best academic scores." She looked over at Mr Schue and Miss Pilsbury and saw them crying but smiling at her. "So today I want to make a promise in front of everyone who means something to me. I promise to do whatever I can in the future to make life better for anyone who is different. I promise to encourage people to be themselves and I will not sit on the fence when I see someone treated badly because of this. I promise to be myself not some fake plastic person who puts appearance over character. I promise to do whatever I can to be a leader rather than a follower. I promise to be a better friend." Quinn took a deep breath. "And because my friends would not let me get away with failing, I promise I will not allow being in a wheelchair to stop me achieving the things I always wanted to do before the accident. As we leave McKinley I hope that each of us go on to be a force for change and a force for good in the world."

The room erupted as she thanked everyone for their support.

"Hey Quinn," Finn called her early the next morning.

"Hi, what's up?"

"Are you busy his morning?"

"I was going to go swimming with Santana and Brit. Why do you ask?"

"Can I come over to see you? I kinda need to tell you something in person."

Finn arrived a while later to find Quinn outside, sat in the driver's seat of her Mom's car.

"What's going on?" He asked as he walked up towards her.

"I'm practicing getting me and my chair in the car. I'm going to start driving again this week."

"Wow, that's awesome. Are you worried about it?"

"Yeah, but every time I get worried about something I just tell myself to suck it up and get on with it. So far it's working out." She looked up at him and thought that he looked a little nervous. "What's with you? And why couldn't you talk on the phone?" Finn watched the blonde girl as she lifted the frame of her chair out of the passenger seat, followed soon after by the wheels. "Sit in the car and tell me what's going on."

He took a seat beside her and took a deep breath. "I need your help with Rachel. I'm going to break some news to her and when I do, she's going to need someone else's shoulder to cry on."

"Finn, what have you done?"

He looked her in the eye, meeting her questioning gaze. He looked down unable to tell her whilst she was staring at him. "I joined the Army."

"Finn, no." She whispered.

"I didn't get into Pace, Rachel's moving on in life and I needed to grow up. I figured the Army was a good place to start."

Quinn understood why. He wanted to honor his father as well. "This is about your Dad too, isn't it."

Finn didn't speak for a few moments. "In part, but it's more about me. I don't know what I want to do, but I know if I'm ever going to be worth anything I need to become a man, not a kid. Rachel said it at prom and it started me thinking about how much everyone else was becoming an adult except me. Thinking I was man enough to be someone's husband was ridiculous."

"But it seems drastic, Finn. The risks are huge and what if you get sent to Afghanistan or somewhere similar? I hate the thought of you being in danger. I care about you. And what about Rachel, she's going to be devastated."

"For her own sake, I'm going to break up with her. It's for the best. She's going to be a big star one day and our futures are in different worlds."

Quinn didn't realize she was crying, but Finn did. He reached over and brushed the tear away from her cheek. She loved Rachel, but she didn't want this for either of them.

"Are you absolutely sure about this? It's not too late to change your mind."

"It's too late, Quinn. I leave for Fort Bragg tomorrow morning, so I need to tell her today. Will you come with me please? I want someone to stay with her after I go."

"Of course I will. I'm going to get all the girls. Does Kurt know and your Mom?"

He nodded. "I told them this morning."

Rachel was up early and went through her normal routine. She was going to go shopping later for college supplies and was hoping Finn would go with her. He had texted her that he was on his way over. She watched out for him and opened the door when she saw his truck pull up. What she hadn't expected was for him to show up with Quinn, but maybe she wanted to go shopping too; she was still having to rely on everyone for lifts.

She watched as Finn helped their friend out of the truck, it was too high for her to transfer into her chair alone. What was confusing was that there was no explanation and both were quiet as they went into the house.

Finn explained to Rachel that he needed to tell her something and she should sit down. Now she knew that something was wrong and her mind started racing. Why were they here together? A pain surged through her chest as she thought about Quinn and Finn's past relationships and she panicked.

"What's going on Finn? Why do I need to sit down and why is Quinn here?" She demanded to know.

"Finn asked me to come here with him to talk to you, but I'm just here for moral support Rach, nothing else..."

The pain eased but she still felt very uneasy and looked searchingly into her boyfriend's eyes. Finn looked at the huge dark eyes staring at him. "Rachel, I joined the army."

Rachel stared for a moment, her mouth open but nothing came out. Quinn looked uncomfortable. "Why?" Rachel eventually squeezed the word out.

"I know you think that you love me and I know I love you, but I have had time to think over the last few weeks and with everything that happened, I realized that neither of us is ready to settle down, Rach. I know you were thinking of deferring your place at NYADA for a year so we could go away together, but I'm grown up enough to realize that I don't want to go to New York and become an actor. It's just not my destiny. But you, you're going to be a big star. We all know it, even you know in your heart that you have what it takes and that's going to mean sacrifices. I'm your first sacrifice. And to be honest, I'm so relieved that we're going to be able to find ourselves and what we really want. While we're together, being apart seems too hard and yet I think that apart we will be able to figure out the best way forward."

"Are you breaking up with me?"

"I'm setting you free. I don't expect you to wait for me. I want you to go to New York and live, Rachel. I want you to pursue your dream and I don't want you wondering what's happening to me. If it's meant to be, we'll find a way back to each other, but that's not likely to happen. We'll go our separate ways and think of each other kindly, remembering that we were young and in love."

"But I don't mind waiting for you, I'll go wherever you go."

"Fort Bragg?"

"Finn, no!" She had tears streaming down her face but didn't argue with him. "This is about your father isn't it?"

He shook his head. "This is about me and you and doing the right thing no matter how hard it will be at first. We'll both be better off in the long run."

In her heart she knew he was right. They were breaking up and moving on. It had been a beautiful partnership, but school was over; their childhood was over. She would hurt like crazy for a while, but she would be fine eventually. Finn, though, was joining the Army and that meant he could go to war. "I don't want you to get hurt."

"I know, but going to New York with nothing to do and no idea what I wanted from life seemed just as painful. I will be careful, I promise. Quinn's going to stay with you, but I have to go. That's why I dragged her here. I don't want you to be on your own right now. Give me one last kiss and then let me go." He leaned towards her, took hold of her and gave her the sort of kiss that stays with you for a lifetime. "Be happy Rachel and don't look back."

And with that, he took a few of his long strides to the front door and out to his truck; moments later the engine roared to life and he was gone.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

The pity party went on for hours and the lost feeling for days, but Rachel had things to do and it kept her mind off Finn. Quinn and Santana made sure they filled her time up and each day got a little easier. She only received one text from him to say he had arrived safely in Fort Bragg, but nothing else after that, she guessed he was trying to rip the Band Aid off to stop it hurting so much.

Quinn spent a lot of time with her friends that summer, more so than she had ever done before and had a great time in spite of still making adjustments to her new situation. They went to the lake on a regular basis, which could have been awkward for her, but they always made it easy if she needed help to get her chair over rough ground or down to the water. With each experience she learned her limitations and pushed at them to get stronger. By having the others around, she was able to try more and not worry if she got stuck because they were there to help out. The result was that after a month, she had much more confidence in her own ability and also became less self-conscious about her disability in public. Her de-sensitized friends also began to treat her the same as everyone else, which meant Santana liberally referred to her as a 'crip' despite being very politically incorrect, but then that was her all over. Quinn had long since become confident enough to use self-deprecating comments about herself, but her friends beginning to joke about her situation was a sign that they no longer felt the awkwardness of pity that had inevitably been present just after the accident.

Quinn felt a little guilty about spending so much time with Rachel. Her feelings hadn't changed, but Rachel's situation had. Even though she was being a good friend and helping to keep her mind off Finn, she still felt bad for enjoying it so much. The old Quinn might have even taken advantage of the situation, but in her heart, she felt unworthy and couldn't let the pint-sized brunette know how she really felt, in spite of her new-found confidence.

One evening, a month into the holidays, Quinn sent everyone a text message. 'Got new car and my license back today!'

Rachel replied, 'OMG, so happy 4 u.'

Santana replied, 'road trip!'

A flurry of text messages followed with numerous congratulations and suggestions. The winning idea was a trip to the drive-in movie theatre in nearby Springfield.

It would have been a squeeze in her old car to fit Santana, Brit, Rachel and Kurt in, but the new Audi station wagon had plenty of room in spite of her chair as well. She had picked up Rachel first, wanting to get the emotional bit out of the way. She pulled up outside and waited for her friend to run out, literally, then stop dead in front of the car, tears running down her face - total Berry drama queen moment - then she realized the wheelchair was in bits in the passenger seat and had to be moved to the trunk, which she did and then finally dropped into the passenger seat where they had a long hug and a cry together.

"So now I finally get to call you brave," Rachel sighed as they finally let go of each other to wipe away the tears.

"The last time I drove you somewhere, it didn't work out too well, so I think you might be the brave one," Quinn grinned despite still sniffing at the same time.

"Are you nervous?"

"I was until I actually set off the first time, but it's pretty easy."

"I'm so happy for you. I know it's been a pain relying on everyone else for a ride."

Quinn nodded. "I feel like I got my freedom back. So, are you ready to get going?"

Rachel nodded and watched intently as Quinn pushed on a lever with her left hand and put the gear into reverse. She released the lever and the car started to roll backwards, steering with her right hand on a little gizmo attached to the wheel. "It's pretty cool, I brake and accelerate with my left hand and steer with the right."

"You make it look easy," the brunette expected driving without legs would be hard.

"That's because it is," Quinn assured her. "An eight year old could do this. It took about half an hour to learn and now it feels pretty normal."

They set off for Brit next who opened the driver door and gave Quinn a hug and jumped in the back seat. She watched Quinn with total fascination and then relayed how everything worked to Kurt after he joined them, which saved Quinn explaining a third time, or a fourth when they eventually picked up Santana.

The Latina made Kurt move out so she could sit next to Brit and then told Quinn she was going to call her car the 'the crip-mobile' from now on.

There were rolled eyes and groans as Santana looked around them all with a smug grin and said "what?" As if she didn't know what she had said wrong. "Jeez, you guys are so sensitive."

Quinn was concentrating on driving but couldn't resist the urge to smile at her friends' conversation.

"I fail to see why you enjoy using terms that could be deemed insensitive or even offensive to the people you love." Rachel was over-thinking again.

Santana groaned. "They're just terms of endearment, like when I call you a hobbit because you're so short. I don't mean it literally, although you are like the shortest eighteen year old I ever met. I guess except for Quinn now she's stunted and all."

Kurt and Brit had both had enough of the conversation and started tickling San, where a fit of giggles started and spread even to Rachel. Quinn glanced briefly at her friend and gave her a smile. "Isn't it good to have everyone laughing again?"

As the summer drew to a close, decisions were finalized. Quinn took a room on campus as she intended, Kurt applied to and got an internship at Vogue magazine so he and Rachel agreed to share an apartment and despite not really wanting to, Santana accepted the scholarship to Louisville that Coach Sue arranged. Kurt intended to apply again to NYADA for the second semester if a place became available and Santana agreed with her Mom that if she hated college in Kentucky, she could drop out and go to New York to look for a job.

Judy took her daughter and Rachel to New York by car. Two wheelchairs and lots of luggage was just going to be too much for them to manage on public transport. Rachel was a week early for her classes but would take the time to sort out the apartment. Kurt was already there but working, so she planned to do all the arranging.

Quinn was only there one day before lectures started. Rachel stayed to help her unpack and make sure she was settled. Judy remained on the street with the car, whilst Quinn checked out the room in Broadway Hall. She had seen a similar room on her earlier visit and wasn't surprised to have one on her own, rather than sharing like most of the other students would be. Rachel ferried their luggage and Quinn's equipment between car and room, which was on the ground floor and close to the entrance.

Rachel was pushing Quinn's spare chair up the ramp with a suitcase in the seat while another freshman was passing in the opposite direction.

"Let me get the door for you," the girl said, holding it open.

Rachel looked up gratefully. "Thanks, steering with one hand isn't easy." As she reached the door, she paused to introduce herself to the tall girl who looked slightly bemused. "Hi, I'm Rachel. Just helping my friend Quinn move in."

"I wondered," the other girl nodded at the wheelchair, which obviously wasn't meant for her. "Carmen," she put out a hand.

They shared a brief conversation and then carried on, but having said their goodbye's to Judy, the school friends ran into Carmen and another girl.

"You must be Quinn?" Carmen introduced herself as Rachel explained their earlier conversation. "This is Mel. We're in the room opposite you." The girls quickly introduced themselves. "Do you guys need any more help moving stuff in?"

"Thanks but we're done, I just chased my Mom off before she stared crying again." Quinn replied. "We were actually just going to go get a coffee if you want to join us?"

Mel and Carmen smiled and agreed. "We were just about to do the same."

They headed out onto Broadway for the nearest Starbucks. each of the girls explained where they were from. Mel was from Delaware and Carmen was from Chicago.

"I think Chicago could be my second favorite place after New York," Rachel said dreamily. "I'll never forget winning Nationals there." Rachel looked like she was in paradise. She was so excited. "Oh my gosh, Quinn. Can you actually believe we're here?"

"Nationals?" Mel asked.

"National Show Choir Championship. We were there just before we finished school," Rachel responded.

"Show choir, as in Glee club?"

"Yeah," Quinn admitted.

"And you won? Wow, I would never have figured."

Quinn grinned. "Don't be fooled by the wheels, I am a drama queen. Admittedly not as much of one as Rachel. She's much more high maintenance than me. Hence she starts at NYADA next week."

"Oh, so you're not roommates?"

"No, Rach just gave me a hand moving in. She's overly protective of me."

Rachel sighed. "I am not overly protective. I just want to make sure that you're okay."

"See what I mean?" Quinn laughed. They arrived at the curb cut by a crosswalk and Quinn popped a wheelie to roll down as it was a little steep.

"Now you're just showing off!" Rachel accused. Turning to the other girls she added, "she doesn't even let you push the chair anymore either."

After coffee and getting to know a little more about one another, the four girls headed back to the dorms. Rachel went to collect her bags while the other three chatted out in the corridor.

"Let me know how everything goes tomorrow," Rachel insisted. "I need to know how cute the boys are in your class." She hugged her friend and bid them all goodbye.

"Say hi to Kurt for me. I'll call tomorrow evening."

Rachel disappeared out the door.

Carmen turned to Quinn. "So we were going to go out for pizza later, do you want to come with us?"

"Thanks, that would be good."

"Plus I was going to say that if you need any help with anything, just let us know. Not that you seem to need any help. That's not offensive or anything is it?"

Quinn laughed. "No it's not. Thanks for the offer. I can manage pretty much everything myself, but if I get into trouble, I'll let you know. I'm still sort of getting used to my limitations so I can make the odd error of judgement and get myself stuck."

"So you haven't been in a wheelchair long then?"

"Just since February, I was in a car accident. Actually Rachel was with me, but fortunately she recovered. It's why she worries about me."

"Wow, that sucks. I mean in your senior year as well." Mel looked a little crestfallen.

"It did at first but I'm pretty much over the worst. I miss cheerleading and dancing a bit. Although I'm learning to dance in a chair, it's not quite the same, but I guess I could have died and that would have sucked more."

"Oh, God, it gets worse, you were a cheerleader as well? Next you'll tell me you were national champions at that as well."

"We'll it's funny you mention that..."

"So how was it?" Rachel was anxious to know.

"Fine thanks. I met a few other people today in class as well as Mel and Carmen."

"They seem really nice."

"Yeah, we went out for pizza last night and got to know each other better. I think they were a bit freaked out at first but they called on me this morning to go to breakfast as well so that's good right? I was worried that I might just rely on you guys and not make any new friends, but everyone seems really nice."

"Why are you so worried about making friends? You were the most popular person in high school."

"Yeah but when I went to high school I wasn't in a chair. It's a little different now."

"Only if you make it different. So long as it doesn't bother you, it won't bother other people. So any cute boys?"

Quinn groaned at the question. "What's with the matchmaking? I told you I'm not ready for dating yet."

At the end of the first week, Quinn had made a number of new friends, most were from the classes she was in or from the dorm. Rachel's prophecy seemed to be true. She was outgoing and sociable, plus it helped that she was not unattractive, mostly she created an impression and everyone remembered her name, unsurprisingly. She had sought out the musical theatre group and joined. Although they had only met once, she had found it enjoyable and full of the sort of people she was used to - Glee club types! Surprisingly she also joined the swimming club. She didn't expect to be competing but wanted to train and they welcomed her along.

She met up with most of the people she had met that week on Friday night, but also invited Rachel and Kurt along and together they bonded over a few drinks. Rachel kept telling lots of stories about Quinn from school and embarrassing her. Fortunately, there was no mention of Beth, but everything else was out of the bag. The thing was though that she didn't mind what anyone knew because it seemed the more she shared of herself, the more interested her fellow students became.

It was a few weeks before Quinn heard much from Santana. They were exchanging texts but it was mostly brief messages and no real details. Quinn had called a few times, but San didn't pick up and just sent a text back. Quinn was beginning to worry, but then got a call one Friday night.

"Hey, it's me."

"I know, your name comes up when you call. Why haven't you been answering before now? I tried to call you a bunch of times."

"Sorry, I had some stuff to deal with. Me and Brit have been having some issues."

"What's going on?"

"Nothing, that's the problem. We have hardly spoken. She spends all her time with the Glee kids, especially Sam and I haven't been able to get home for the weekend because of all the training and competitions I have to do as part of my scholarship."

Quinn had wondered how relationships were going to survive over long distances, even when two people were as compatible at Brit and Santana.

"We broke up."

Quinn hadn't expected that. "I'm really sorry, San." There wasn't much else she could say. "Why don't you come out here for the weekend next week? We can go out and get blind drunk."

"Thanks but I have a game Friday night and practice all day Sunday and I can't skip. Besides, I don't want you getting arrested for drink driving a wheelchair."

"Very funny. I'd offer to come and stay with you but I'm guessing that could be awkward, besides I don't even know where Kentucky is, is it like somewhere in the middle?" She loved verbal sparring with Santana, who chuckled on the other end of the phone.

"Gots to go mi Amiga, say hola to the hobbit and Lady Hummel for me."

"You promised you were going to stop calling her that!"

"I can't resist, sorry."


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: I have received some really great reviews for this story, so here's a little more. Let me know what you think. Thanks to all those who sent me feedback and kind comments - and for those who admitted to staying up late reading everything so far, I apologize for disturbing your sleep pattern!

Disclaimer: Still not owning Glee

Chapter 11

Quinn had sent Santana a few messages to check that she was okay and thought the replies seemed a little sad, there was nothing much she could do until the holidays, when they would both be home. So it was a shock when a few weeks later, one Friday night, there was a knock on her door.

Quinn called out "Who is it?" She was already in bed and didn't want to get up unless it was necessary.

"Come on open the door before I go all Lima Heights." Santana's unmistakable voice shouted through the door.

"San, what the hell?" Quinn pushed herself upright and yanked back the quilt. "Just give me a minute!" It took a minute or so to slide her legs off the bed and slip into the wheelchair beside her.

Santana heard shuffling then the distinctive sound of Quinn's wheels rolling across to the door. The door handle turned a moment later to let her in.

"Oh my God! I wasn't expecting you." Quinn pulled back to let her friend in.

"I almost didn't come, but I needed to see you." Santana dropped her bags away from the door.

"That's a lot of luggage for a flying visit," Quinn noted.

"It's everything I had with me in college, I quit."

Quinn's mouth fell open as Santana reached down for a hug. She held on a long time and Quinn felt the other girl's chest heave; she was crying.

"I was going to ask how you were doing but I guess I don't need to ask now. Sit," she instructed San to drop into her lap, which she did without breaking the hold. They stayed like that for a few minutes until the heaving subsided to an occasional sniff.

"If you tell anyone I went soft, you know I'm going to deny it, right?"

"I know," Quinn whispered. "Better yet?"

"Yeah, thanks. Sorry for dropping in unannounced."

Quinn smiled at her friend. "It's fine, I wasn't asleep. I just got back from the movies."

"So you made some friends then?"

"Don't look so surprised. I've been very sociable and I can't think why, but everyone seems to remember my name." She put on her fake surprised face.

Santana raised an eyebrow and looked at Quinn. For a moment, she forgot that she was sat in her friend's lap because she couldn't stand up to give her a hug. "You actually look different, you know."

"What?" Quinn asked confused.

"You look sort of happy. I don't really know the last time you actually looked like that, if ever."

"I suppose I am. I'm enjoying college. I've met new friends and seen my old ones regularly, joined the musical theatre group. What's not to be happy about?"

"I hate Kentucky." Santana rolled her eyes. "It was full of the same type of people as Lima. The cheer squad were the same as they were at school only more bitchy and competitive with each other. Most of them seemed intent on sleeping their way through the football team."

"And you missed us?" Quinn suggested.

"I missed Brit the most and that snake Sam totally took advantage. But I missed you and the h... Rachel as well. We had a fun summer and I just wanted to hang out with you some more."

"Did you tell your Mom yet?"

She shook her head. "I think she knew I wouldn't last there anyway, but I'll tell her this weekend. Can I crash here for a little while, just until I can sort out somewhere suitable?"

"Sure, so long as you don't mind sharing."

"Course not. I just need to use the bathroom, so go ahead and get into bed. You must be tired." Santana pulled some things from her bag to change into.

"I was going to offer you something to drink," Quinn suggested.

"Thanks but its late and I don't want to keep you up."

Quinn waited for Santana to finish up in the bathroom wondering what she was planning to do now she had dropped out of college.

"I'm going to see Rachel and Kurt's place tomorrow," she called out.

"Cool. I'll come with you." Came the muffled reply followed by the bathroom door opening. Santana was stood brushing her teeth still.

Quinn had put a hoodie on over her PJs to get the door, but started to strip it off in order to get back in bed. The PJs consisted of a sleeveless top and shorts, similar to what her Latin friend was now wearing. Lifting the hoodie revealed Quinn's new shape to Santana.

She noticed the thicker muscles in Quinn's arms and shoulders, inevitable from all the work they were now doing. In comparison, her legs and lower body were thinner again than they had been before. That said, Santana cast an appreciative glance over her friend's body. There was something appealing about it to the darker girl, but she was definitely lighter than she had been.

"I think you need feeding up. Are you eating properly?" Santana asked as she switched off the bathroom light.

"What?" Quinn asked. She glanced down at herself.

"You look like you lost weight."

Quinn sighed and pushed her knees together in what was becoming her trademark move when she was a little uncomfortable. "Remember Lucy Caboosey?"

Santana laughed. "Hey at least you weren't wearing a T-shirt with 'Lebanese' on the front."

"I just meant that it took months to get rid of that puppy fat. I'm not going back there again. It's really easy to put weight on when you can't run it off. I've been doing a lot of swimming."

"That explains the guns then," Santana smirked, giving Quinn's bicep a squeeze.

"God, you're insufferable sometimes."

"Admit it, you missed me."

"Get into bed and shut up," Quinn sighed. "I need to be on this side so I can get into my chair, the bed's too close to the wall on the other side."

Santana glanced over and saw what she meant. "Sorry I didn't think about that."

"Nothing to apologize for," Quinn replied.

Santana pulled back the sheets and held them up as she scooted across to the far side so her blonde friend could slide across without getting tangled in them. She watched as Quinn slipped out of her chair and onto the bed with an effortless grace. Pivoting around at the hips, she lifted her legs in one at a time and straightened them out initially. After adjusting where her hips were, she turned onto her side so her back was to the other girl. The spare pillow from the foot of the bed was squashed between Quinn's knees and she finally laid down.

"Comfortable?" Santana asked her.

"Yeah, thanks. Don't forget I have to flip over halfway through the night. Sorry if I wake you."

"Like you sad to me a few minutes ago, nothing to apologize for. Goodnight."

"Goodnight." Quinn relaxed into the pillow under her head and the found an arm snake across her ribs as Santana curled up next to her. She was definitely going soft.

"You're awesome, you know that right?" Santana whispered.

"Go to sleep," Quinn smiled.

The following morning they both got up and took a shower. It took Quinn three times longer to get ready compared to Santana, but by ten o'clock she had finally taken her meds and they were ready. It was chilly outside so Quinn wore thermal leggings under her jeans and the ballet shoes were in the closet until summer, replaced by a pair of dark red Doc Martin boots over two pairs of thick socks.

"What's with all the layers? It's not that cold out."

"Even with the extra layers, my legs still get really cold, San. They don't feel temperature anymore, remember. I don't want to get frostbite!"

Santana's head dropped. "I keep forgetting how much crap you have to put up with."

"Hey, come on. It's no big deal, I'm used to this sort of thing now." Quinn switched from the bed to her chair, put on her Columbia hoodie and a down vest over the top. She adjusted her hips in the chair and placed her feet in the frame, fidgeted with her legs a little and then declared herself ready. "This still freaks you out a bit, doesn't it?" Quinn could feel Santana's eyes on her and thought the best thing was to talk about it.

"I just keep wondering why this had to happen to you. It's not fair and it sucks. I don't even care about the wheelchair, it's the other stuff that bugs me and I don't know how you're still sane. It would drive me nuts."

Quinn gave her friend a sympathetic glance. "You're right about it not being fair, but that's just how life is sometimes. I know you feel bad for me and I appreciate that, but it's not that hard anymore. I know you think it is, but honestly, I am pretty fortunate. I can look after myself now without any help and until you've had someone have to do pretty much everything for you, you can't know how important that is."

"I get that, it's just hard to watch you struggle sometimes."

"I could have broken my neck instead of my back, San. Imagine having to watch someone dress and feed me, see me in a powerchair instead of this. That could have easily happened, or worse, I could have suffered brain damage, lost my memory, be dead. Every time I think it's too hard, that's what I think about."

Santana hung her head. "I know... I just ... I couldn't take it and I'm in awe that you can."

"I would have said that too until it happened to me and then you just have to get on with it. I hope nothing like this ever happens to you San, but if it did, you'd be okay, honestly." Santana didn't reply so Quinn tried to lighten the mood. "If you don't cheer up, I'll tell Rachel that you cried last night."

"You wouldn't be that mean," San shook off her mood.

"Try me!"

It took two buses to get to Rachel and Kurt's apartment and then a slow elevator ride to the third floor. Quinn had Santana wait out of the way before knocking. Rachel opened the door and waved her in.

"Hang on, I have a surprise." Rachel turned and watched Quinn for a moment. "Ta da!" She pointed to the door and Santana jumped out on queue.

"Oh my gosh! What are you doing here?"

"Surprise!" The brunettes hugged each other.

"Why didn't you tell me, Quinn?"

"I didn't know," the blonde replied with a bemused look. "Put some coffee on and San can explain."

It didn't take long for Santana to tell Rachel what she had done.

"So what are you going to do now?" She turned to the former cheerleader with the familiar penetrating stare.

"I can't crash with Q forever, I guess I'll look for a place to stay and some work until I figure out what I want to do. I might take some classes to boost my application and start college next year. Of course I might not need them if I can get some auditions."

"Why don't you stay here, we have another room. I just need to okay it with Kurt, but I'm sure he won't mind."

"That sounds great, I'd love to stay with you guys." San seemed genuinely pleased. "Where is Kurt?" She finally realized he was missing.

"He didn't come home last night, I believe he might be infatuated with one of Quinn's classmates."

"Michael?"

"They were talking all night and when I left, he said he was going to follow me back later, but I got a cryptic text saying he was going to stay elsewhere." Rachel and Quinn clearly had the same social circle but Santana was out of the loop.

"Hang on, what happened to Blaine?"

"Brittany didn't tell you?" Rachel asked, surprised she was unaware of the situation.

Quinn drew a line across her throat at the mention of Brit in a gesture that said 'don't mention her name,' but it was too late.

A sad smile passed across San's lips. "We haven't spoken much, we broke up."

Rachel's mouth fell open and she was lost in thought for a moment, then the gushing started. "I'm so sorry," she looped her arm through Santana's and led her to the sofa. "What happened?"

"We just grew apart and I never had any time to get home to see her. It's not the same chatting on Skype. Next thing I know she's spending a lot of time with Sam, I got jealous, we had a big row and I realized it was over."

"Brit had a row with you?"

"We'll, it was mostly me yelling," she admitted. "Brit just got sad we never had time together and claimed she was just friends with Sam."

"Same sort of thing with Kurt and Blaine," Rachel mumbled.

Quinn interrupted, "Not quite the same thing, Blaine cheated on him."

Santana was surprised at that. "So they are over?"

"Blaine claims he was just lonely and nothing happened even though he slept over, but Kurt felt betrayed and ended it. Blaine wants to get back together but Kurt just wants them to be friends from now on."

"So we all got dumped," Santana mumbled.

"Except Quinn," Rachel just had to say that.

Santana eyed the blonde. "So no prospects yet?"

Quinn sighed knowing what she was pushing for. "Leave me out of this," she pleaded.

"Why?"

"There are a number of Quinn's classmates who admire her but she's waiting," Rachel stated flatly. She'd already had this conversation before. They had been at college for over two months and Quinn hadn't even gone on a date, despite a number of approaches.

"What are you waiting for? A miracle?"

"Santana!" Rachel hissed, thinking she knew what this was about. "That's going too far, even for you."

Quinn sighed. "Rachel, please. It's fine. She's right."

Rachel looked at Quinn in surprise, thinking that the self-assured blonde had moved beyond her injury.

"There are a number of reasons why I haven't gone out with anyone. Partly because of Beth, I made a mistake and paid a heavy price for it, even if I don't regret having her. I also have some concerns about, you know... " she pointed down at her legs and they knew what she meant. "There's also the thought that I am still looking for the right person and I am not sure I just want to try people on for size; I still believe the right thing to do is to wait until you find the one."

"But what if you don't know someone is the one until you go out with them." Rachel tutted to Santana. "There's this really cute guy on Quinn's swim team who is desperate to go out with her. He's asked you like five times."

"Hang on, when did you join the swim team?"

"About a day after I joined the theatre group and realized they rehearsed on different days." She shrugged. "It's no big deal, I only swim fifty free and the backstroke in the medley relay for like the third team."

"I didn't know you were interested in swimming," San commented.

"I wasn't until after the accident and I realized it was great to be able to do something pretty normal. I'm not as quick as I would be with legs, but back and free don't need them so much. I'm way slower than everyone else but I get time taken off my finish to make it a level playing field in competitions, I've only done three meets so far but I enjoy the training and its keeping me fit. It's the only thing I can do to get my heart rate over a hundred and twenty!"

Santana looked confused and Quinn's comments distracted her from the dating talk. "It's only been like two months since we saw each other and everything is changing."

"We've grown up a bit I guess," Quinn nodded sympathetically.

"So why are you not dating this guy? What's his name?" She asked Rach.

"Josh, six feet tall, curly brown hair, abs of steel and he spends a lot of time running around the pool trying to help Quinn out, which she rebuffs constantly."

"I let him help me out of the deep end occasionally," Quinn gave a wry smile. "He's cute, but not my type anymore."

"So what is your type these days?" Rachel was on a roll now she had an ally.

San raised an eyebrow at Quinn as if to say now's your chance, but Quinn had a will of steel so her answer was much more cryptic.

"I think I'd prefer someone a little more Bohemian," and refused to say any more. Fortunately she was saved by a tired looking Kurt who walked in a moment later and the awkward conversation came to an abrupt halt as he and Santana were reunited.


	12. Chapter 12

**Content warning: This Chapter rated M for some mild sexual content**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Glee**

Chapter 12

A few hours later, Quinn and Santana were walking from the bus stop on Broadway to the dorms. Quinn had been quiet and Santana sensed she might have gone too far.

"Sorry about pushing you earlier to say something."

"I know what you were doing. I appreciate that you were giving me an opportunity to tell her, but I'm not going to for all the reasons I told you before."

"Why don't you think you are good enough to deserve being loved? Don't you realize that pretty much everyone who knows you is half in love with you already."

"What?" Quinn strained to look up whilst continuing to push the wheels on her chair at a steady pace. "What on earth made you say that?"

"Because it's true. Have you ever been turned down by someone?"

"Finn dumped me and even when we got back together it wasn't right."

"Yeah but I mean someone you hadn't already been out with."

Quinn thought for a moment. She had blown it with a few people, but she couldn't think of anyone who had blown her off when she had made an advance and she had turned down plenty more than that.

"I guess not," she acquiesced.

"See what I mean?"

"That's always been guys though and I don't even know if what I feel means I'm gay or if I'm just confused."

"Why did you go out with Finn?"

"Honestly? I thought he was the type of boy my Dad would be happy for me to date; the quarterback with down to earth goodness."

"Why are you in love with Berry?"

"Because she's everything that I should have been. Kind and forgiving, determined beyond anyone I ever met, courageous in following what she sees as the right path. She has integrity and never compromises what she believes in and when she sings it's as though she means every word, I believe her."

"You didn't mention what they looked like."

"It's not something I think is important anymore. Can we please not talk about this."

"See I think you need to. You're throwing yourself into all these things to avoid dealing. Like swimming and theatre, that's you trying to show Rach you're okay."

"It's really not, but whatever."

"You're telling me that if you hadn't been injured," San didn't get to finish.

"Paralyzed you mean," Quinn corrected her.

"Same thing."

"Not the same thing, San. Rachel was injured, I was paralyzed. You can say it you know. You joke about the crip thing, but that's your way of avoiding."

San blushed. "Sorry."

Quinn new she meant it, Santana rarely apologized even when she was wrong.

"As I was saying, if you hadn't been paralyzed, happy now, you wouldn't be in the swim team of all things."

"No, I'd be at Yale and cheerleading instead." Quinn hadn't wanted to sound bitter, but she wasn't in the mood to defend herself either and hoped that would shut her up.

"So this is the replacement?"

"No San. God you are hard work sometimes. Doesn't it occur to you that I might just need to go and churn up and down the pool as a way of blowing off some steam. That's why I loved cheering, just moving around and being free. I miss it, alright. I might have pretended to be okay at school but then I would be sat at the front of the choir room and you and Brit would just come running in, wearing that uniform and reminding me each time what I was missing out on. I don't miss who I was when I wore that uniform, but I still miss just being able to move. When I am in the water, I feel free again. It started when I was in rehab and my therapist told me I was a natural. I used to swim plenty in our pool at home and in case you hadn't noticed, I was willing to put up with all kinds of indignity to get in the lake this summer."

"So this is nothing to do with Rachel?"

"No, this is about me making something of myself. You know one of the most amazing things about Rachel, was that no matter how much crap she got from us, and that was a lot, she never stopped pursuing what she wanted and that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to keep trying to make something of my life in spite of what people will say to me or about me because I'm a paraplegic."

Santana glanced at her friend. She was barely recognizable from when they had met in freshman year of high school. She wondered what had changed her, maybe giving birth to a child who she then had to give up, maybe realizing she was in love with another girl, or maybe it was that damned accident, but the new Quinn Fabray was definitely the improved version.

"Done?"

"I guess," Quinn realized she had just handed her friend a lecture.

"Now do you see why everyone is half in love with you?"

"I still don't get what you mean."

"Look, I know I joke about it, the crip thing, but you're right. I avoid difficult emotions so I guess I deserved that. I couldn't admit that I was gay for a long time, until doughboy outed me and forced me to accept it and admit it. I wouldn't do that to you, but I wanted you to at least accept that you are entitled to feel something for another person. You act like you don't deserve someone else's love and it's just not true. Do you want to know what I think about you?"

"I don't know if I'm brave enough for that," Quinn smiled as she said it. She knew Santana liked her rep of being scary.

"I think you're amazing, Q. You should be so pissed at everyone and everything and you're not. You make one stupid mistake that any of us could have made, get knocked up, but when you try to do the right thing, you get kicked out of the house and lose your place on the Cheerios. Then you fight back to overcome all that, get into Yale and back on the squad, only to get hit by a truck whose brakes failed and end up paralyzed for the rest of your life."

"When you put it like that, I think I should be miserable."

"I'm glad you're not. You've become this person that seems to be able to take anything that life throws at you and still smile. I don't know if you're aware of this, but you smile and laugh a lot more than when you had nothing to worry about except your roots showing."

Quinn raised her eyebrows? "I do?"

"Absolutely. I want you to be happy more than anything. You deserve it after this,' she dropped her hand on the back of the wheelchair. "I think that although you might derive a sense of achievement from all these activities, and I don't doubt you will be great at them, that's not the same as being happy. We are only really happy when we share ourselves with someone else."

"That's profound," Quinn acknowledged. "But it doesn't change that fact that Rach is straight. All she talks about is boys, well apart from musical theatre. If things were different I might see the wisdom in telling her, but she's not gay."

Santana wasn't so sure but didn't say anything. Rachel had wanted to be everything that Quinn had been, even down to almost getting a nose job. There had to be something in that. Then there was Quinn wanting the integrity that Rachel had. Mutual admiration, for sure, but perhaps more. Before anything could happen though, she felt sure Quinn had to know about herself and maybe she could help there.

"You may have a point," Santana responded eventually. "But that doesn't change how attractive you are even though you fail to see it."

They reached the dorm and Santana held the door for Quinn to roll through. They arrived outside Quinn's room in a few seconds. "What do you mean?" The blonde girl asked, still not entirely sure where this conversation was going. She opened the door and rolled inside.

Santana followed her in, waiting for Quinn to close the door. "Come here," she held out her hand for Quinn to take hold. Pulling Quinn forwards until she was in front of the full length mirror in the bathroom, Santana stood behind the chair and directed her gaze to meet that of her seated friend. "Take a good look at yourself. What do you see?"

"Someone wearing too many clothes indoors," Quinn blushed a little with embarrassment.

"We can soon fix that," Santana waved at the thick jacket.

Quinn rolled her eyes but slipped off the down vest. Realizing San wasn't happy with that alone, she stripped off the hoodie as well, to leave her sat in T-shirt and jeans.

"So go ahead," when you look at yourself what do you see?"

Quinn sighed, knowing San was determined. "I guess I have an okay face," she started, but found San spluttering.

"Come on, your face is gorgeous, even if the nose was helped a little."

She sighed. "Okay, whatever. My boobs are a bit small, but not as small as they were before Beth, so I guess they're okay too. My arms and shoulders are okay too I guess. I mean I need them to be strong now so.."

"They do make you look strong and you should be proud of that. They're the symbol of your recovery."

"But then I look at my lower body and I just look broken."

"You're not broken."

"San, please. Look at how skinny my legs are already. What will they be like in five years or ten? I used to fill these jeans, now they hang off me."

"They are beautiful because they belong to you and you are beautiful. You think that you lost your attractiveness because your legs don't work, but that's not true. You are still the prettiest girl I ever met, but fear made you hard on the inside when you were younger. Now somehow, that's gone and it shows in the way you listen to someone and talk to them. The chair isn't something that makes you less attractive, you are more attractive now than you have ever been and I just wish you could see yourself the way I see you."

Quinn turned and looked at Santana. "Are you being serious?"

"Totally," she held her gaze for a few seconds. "I would love to show you how attractive I think you are. I know you're in love with someone else, but that shouldn't stop us having a little fun. Remember what I said earlier about never having been turned down? I wouldn't turn you down!" Santana winked at the blonde girl and turned to leave.

Quinn followed the brunette out of the bathroom, her mouth was open in surprise. "Are you suggesting what I think you are?"

"I thought I was pretty unsubtle about it. Look, you're confused, I'm rebounding. I'm not suggesting we get married, I'm suggesting that you explore your confusion and I get to act out a fantasy. I always thought you were hot, so ... why not have a little fun?"

Quinn made as if she was about to speak but nothing came out. Her big brain was working to resolve the dilemma she now faced. On the one hand, she had sworn off relationships and casual sex had never really been her style, but on the other hand, she was curious about how it would work, especially with her abbreviated sensation. And San was offering it with no strings attached. And San had just said she thought she was hot!

Santana didn't push, she just sat and waited for Quinn to decide. The blonde girl rolled a little closer. "I guess I am curious, but I don't know how this works ..." She looked like she might even cry. "I mean, I don't even know what I can really do."

"You won't know until you try," Santana smiled.

Quinn edged a little closer. Santana parted her knees so Quinn could roll right up to the bed. "No strings or labels, right?"

The darker girl nodded and placed her hands on Quinn's knees which were between her own. Quinn glanced down. She felt nothing but somehow it was nice that the other girl wasn't afraid to touch her legs. Quinn reached forwards and placed her hands on Santana's shoulders for support. Hesitantly she leaned in and Santana did the same. As their lips brushed against each other there was a spark of something familiar in both of them. It started softly at first, then. grew more heated as tongues pushed their way between lips.

Quinn grew a little frustrated at the gap between their bodies and was leaning so far forwards, she was almost doubled over. She felt Santana push her shoulders back and the thought entered her mind that she was being rejected for a moment.

Santana was simply trying to get Quinn to sit back so she could get closer. "Relax," she instructed. "Let me come to you." Quinn sat back in her chair and her eyes widened as the other girl stood briefly before sitting in her lap, not like others did though, with legs to the side, Santana straddled her knees so each leg was dangling off to the side. "I'm not going to hurt you sitting like this am I?" Quinn simply shook her head and they resumed kissing only this time, their bodies were closer.

They kissed until their lips were bruised. Breaking apart, Quinn breathed into Santana's ear. "I want more."

Santana shuffled backwards until her feet touched the floor and she kicked off her shoes. Typically energetic, she dived onto the bed and rolled across to the far side. With more than a hint of lust, she patted the bed to beckon Quinn over. The blonde girl grinned at the brashness of her friend and pushed herself alongside the bed. In a practiced move, Quinn slid her hips across and hoping that it wouldn't kill the moment, lifted her useless legs up one at a time. She was still wearing her boots, so she reached forwards and folded her right leg so she could reach the laces. San sat up briefly and rolled onto her knees to reach the left. The laces were hastily pulled open and the boots discarded. The Latina lay back down and waited for Quinn to do the same.

It was another of those moments when Santana realized how complicated living life without your legs was. Even lying down took longer as Quinn walked her hands back, dropped onto her elbows and then finally onto her back. Santana offered her a hand which Quinn took and used it to roll onto her side, her body fell into place perfectly beside the other girl. San felt Quinn's legs fall into her own, but chose to ignore it, not wanting to draw attention to something Quinn had no control over.

It wasn't long before the kissing resumed only this time a hand snaked under Quinn's T-shirt and she felt fingers swirling along the length of her spine in an upwards arc, then draw down under her arm and across her ribs. This ignited her senses. She wrapped an arm around Santana's neck and pulled closer, teasing off the band that fastened the dark hair in a ponytail. She moved from kissing Santana's lips to her neck, trailing a line down as far as the other girl's clothing would allow. Quinn heard her own heartbeat quicken and Santana's breath hitch as she nipped at the skin on her collar bone.

Quinn tugged at the edge of Santana's top, trying to pull it up. Santana wriggled out of it. When she tried to reciprocate, she couldn't get it free with Quinn laid down. "Let's sit up," Santana urged. She pulled Quinn up so they were sat beside each other. Quinn had to prop herself up with her hands as Santana lifted her T-shirt up as far as her ribs. Quinn threaded one arm through at a time so she could keep her balance and then Santana shuffled around so she was facing the blonde girl.

"I want to try something, okay?"

Quinn nodded, trusting that Santana knew what she was doing.

The dark-haired girl manipulated her own legs, wrapping them around Quinn's hips, which served to prop the blonde girl up without the need to use her hands. It also meant their bodies were pressed close together. Santana drew Quinn's legs behind her own hips to keep them from getting tangled in the sheets. Their position allowed Santana the access to all the parts Quinn could feel, which she attacked mercilessly.

Quinn felt fingers dancing across her chest and shoulders, then down over her back and ribs. Santana's touch was electric and ignited feelings she didn't know existed. Her experiences with boys had never been like this. She felt as though every bit of skin on her upper body was tingling. Meanwhile Quinn had found Santana's nipples and tweaked one while the other arm wrapped around her back. The touches and caresses continued, working both into a state of ecstasy. Eventually Santana pulled away and kneeled up. She unfastened her jeans and slipped them over her hips taking her underwear along with it. Quinn looked into the other girl's eyes and knew what she wanted but doubt bubbled to the surface.

"Come on, trust me. Remember, you won't know until you try."

"There's no point," she replied, her lip trembling.

"Of course there is, why are you worried?" Santana leaned forward and reached out to help Quinn remove the rest of her clothing, but a hand fell on top of hers.

"Please, I was enjoying what we were doing."

"It's okay," Santana reassured her. Quinn removed her hand and allowed the other girl to unfasten her jeans. "Lift up so I can get them off," the brunette instructed. Quinn did as she was asked and Santana tugged off the loose clothing.

"Why aren't you grossed out by this?" The blonde asked as her narrow hips and legs were revealed.

"Sshh," Santana placed a finger over the other girl's lips. "Just enjoy this, stop doubting yourself."

"But I can't feel anything. What's the point?"

Santana gently pushed at Quinn's shoulders to make her lie back. "This is like a scientific experiment," she answered. "Just like when we had that sleepover and you made everyone touch your leg."

As Quinn's back hit the mattress, Santana leaned forward and ran her hands over every exposed bit of skin she could. Each time she touched the line across Quinn's hips where the feeling ended, the blonde hissed with pleasure. She kissed and licked the skin there over and over, drawing her fingers across Quinn's ribs which also produced pleasurable noises. She played with her nipples and kissed her breasts until Quinn was literally panting.

"Put your fingers inside me," she ordered. Quinn nervously did as she was told. "What does it feel like?"

"Warm and soft. I can feel you squeezing my fingers, pulling them in deeper. It feels good."

Santana was having a hard time focusing as Quinn's fingers played with her, driving her crazy. The pleasurable sounds were coming from both of them now.

Santana continued to lavish attention on Quinn's hips and ribs with one hand and her mouth, but used her other hand to nudge the other girl's resistant legs apart. "You might not feel this, but now you know what it feels like," Santana whispered as she slid her fingers inside Quinn.

Quinn glanced down and could see San's fingers massaging her labia, reciprocating her own actions. She didn't feel it directly but her brain made the connection and between the arousal from what she could see, the workings of Santana's hand across the hypersensitive line on her hips and the lips nipping at her nipples, a searing flash of heat spread up from her belly and across her chest. It happened so fast, Quinn wondered if she had imagined it, but even if she had, her breath caught and the skin across her chest flushed red. She had never felt anything like it before.

Santana knew what had just happened but couldn't speak as her mind went blank and the pleasure of her own orgasm consumed her briefly.


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: Still not owning Glee

Chapter 13

"Oh sweet Jesus," Santana dropped on top of Quinn and just lay there for a while. "Tell me that had some sort of effect on you because honestly, my world is rocking right now."

Quinn had a huge smile on her face to begin with and it morphed into a chuckle after she listened to the other girl's words. "I don't know what I was expecting but it was _way _better than anything I had imagined."

"Now you know what it's like to get some real attention, you think you'll go back to the dark side?"

Quinn laughed again. "I'm not sure you've cured my confusion, but this trying people on for size thing might be a better idea than I thought." Quinn's voice dropped into the soft warm whisper that made Santana fantasize in the first place.

"Well I have done my bit to entice you into my way of thinking," San smiled and tucked Quinn's hair behind her ear.

The blonde chuckled again, but then went quiet. "I know this was just a bit of fun for you, but thanks." She raised her eyes to the ceiling. "I had no idea what to expect or what I would be able to contribute, you know without being able to feel or move half my body."

"I have absolutely no complaints on that score. You must have seen what you did to me."

Quinn blushed. "You made it fun and light and didn't make me feel, I don't know, less of a person."

"That's because you're not any less of a person! Oh my God. You make it hard to convince you that being with you is amazing, like inspiring and I just hope you enjoyed it as much as I did."

"I did, honestly. I was worried that I just wouldn't get anything from it, physically I mean. It's not the same as before, like my erogenous zones seem to have moved north of my injury. It's really weird, but instead of feeling it down below, I felt it in my chest. It was really quick but really intense."

"I'm glad. I was worried too, about you not being able to feel anything. I thought I might have upset you for a moment, but then when I saw you go, I was so happy that it got me there as well." Santana actually blushed. "That was one of the best moments of my life, realizing that you could still, you know…" she trailed off.

"You think it made you happy? How do you think I feel?"

"How do you feel? You always play everything so close to your chest, Q. It drives everyone insane."

"Everyone?"

"Those who care about you."

"I guess I am more messed up by my family than I care to admit." Her eyes closed briefly and Santana worried that when they reopened, they would turn hard again, like when she had been younger. A sigh escaped the pink lips. "I did a lot to keep my father happy when I was little. I got used to hiding what I really thought and felt; partly through the guilt he managed to make me feel and partly because I thought he might love me if I was the person he wanted me to be. That's when I started hiding my true self. Every time I let that slip, my life became more difficult. Getting pregnant at fifteen was about the worst thing I could have done, but the truth is, that if he had allowed me to get a proper education about sex and relationships instead of the religious mumbo jumbo he fed me, I wouldn't have had unprotected sex. If he had treated me like a human being and accepted the floors, I wouldn't have been such a bitch. I had no help from either of them to find a moral compass. At least Mom has stopped drinking now and to be honest, I look at the accident a little differently as a result. It made her become my Mom again and that's a good thing for both of us. I can't say I have forgotten her betrayal when my father kicked me out of the house, but she was treated just as badly by him and I don't blame her anymore. The person who treated me with respect and dignity during that time was Rachel. While the rest of the school acted with disdain and malice, she just reassured me that everything would be okay. I was horrified at the feelings I had for her and then became so insanely jealous I set about stealing Finn away from her so I didn't have to see them happy together."

"That was fairly horrifying to see for the most part," Santana interjected the humor.

Quinn chuckled. "Thanks for making me laugh, but I was horrid to her so now I am caught in this maelstrom of feelings about her and for her. On the one hand, she rocks my world and on the other, I am still so filled with guilt about the way I acted, I can't imagine why she would ever want to be with me."

"But you know what I see? I see you make her happy. If you smile, she smiles, if you laugh, she laughs, if you cry, she cries. Her emotions are tied to yours. I watched her face when you made your speech on the last day of school and I have never seen anyone look so proudly at another. I don't think Rachel even knows this herself, but the two of you have a connection and that cannot be denied much longer."

"I know. You're right. But what happens if she freaks out and does a runner? I lose again."

"You can handle loss, Quinn. If anyone can take it, it's you. But imagine what you might gain if she reacts positively?"

"It would be so much easier if it was you I had these feelings about," Quinn puffed in frustration.

"Tell me about it, but the truth is, we're too much alike and we'd drive each other nuts."

Quinn laughed. "If earlier was anything to go by, we wouldn't get much work done either!"

Santana laughed with her. "True enough."

"Thanks. For what you did earlier I mean. It must have been difficult to get past your squeamishness." She pointed at her legs.

"Hey, no way." Santana spoke softly. "The pleasure was all mine. Making love to you was easy and the most natural thing in the world." She meant it too. "I guarantee, whoever you give it up for will not be disappointed."


	14. Chapter 14

A/N: So I stirred things up a little in the last couple of chapters. Thanks for the feedback, even if you didn't like what I wrote. Anyway, here's the continuation.

Disclaimer: Same as usual, Glee belongs to Fox not me.

Chapter 14

The Latina moved in with Rachel and Kurt the following day and phoned a couple of days later to say that she had taken a job at Coyote Ugly as well, but complained bitterly that they had forbidden her from drinking so she was limited to dancing and singing. Quinn was amused and reminded her that as much as she would have liked to, she probably wouldn't be able to come and watch her perform either as they were all under age.

Santana fitted right into New York life. Her appearance altered quickly, she had her hair down more often and dressed a little older than the rest, influenced by the other women she worked with. Kurt was constantly giving them advice courtesy of his work at Vogue and Rachel ditched much of her Ohio wardrobe as a result of that and the influence of her peers at NYADA. She still had some dodgy night wear according to Santana, but otherwise the knee highs and reindeer sweaters seemed to have vanished and a more sophisticated Rachel was born. Quinn's look merged with the other students on her course. The weather and her disability altered her appearance as well. Despite not wanting to succumb, living life sat down changed things. She got cold quickly when the ambient temperature dropped and needed gloves to keep her hands from constantly getting wrecked, especially in bad weather. Her feet didn't sit right in the chair with heels and some things were virtually impossible to get on her legs – Lycra was the worst – meaning she tended to stick to looser jeans, flat shoes or sneakers, thick sweaters and darker colors because her hands picked up dirt really quickly and it tended to get all over without her realizing. Anything light colored, especially on her legs, seemed to get dirty really quickly. Rachel and Santana both kept their long hair, but Quinn went back to her shorter crop. It was taking too much time to look after long hair on top of her extended morning routine. So they all changed a little over the first few months.

"Ready to take a little trip home?" Rachel asked Quinn as they sat in her dorm one Wednesday evening. The shorter girl was referring to their impending visit to Lima for Thanksgiving. Although travel was always a bit of a pain now for Quinn, she didn't want to miss seeing her Mom and surprisingly her sister who was planning a visit. They had never really been close with such an age gap, but her sister had been very supportive since the accident and she was looking forward to showing her sister how much progress she had made since they had seen each other last, just after her release from hospital.

"I am actually. Mr Schue sent me an email as well, did you get one?"

"I did. He seems to be having some issues with the new kids. Lots of in-fighting and a love triangle – imagine that!"

Quinn rolled her eyes. "Can you believe we spent all that time being jealous of each other over Finn?"

Rachel went quiet. "I can in one sense. He was handsome and the quarterback and essentially a good guy, but I admit it feels very provincial now. I wonder how he is. Kurt says he hasn't been in touch with anyone, not even his Mom. I don't love him anymore, but I am worried about him."

"Me too." Quinn still had a soft spot for him, even if things didn't go well between them for the most part. "Is San still refusing to go?"

"So she says, I think she is avoiding the Brittany situation. She is much calmer these days and I think she misses her, but isn't missing being in Lima."

"I think you're right, but I think she needs Brit alongside her to be happy. She is the center of Santana's universe, even if our feisty friend won't admit it."

"Maybe Brittany might move here after school. I miss her unique perspective as well the updates about Lord Tubbington," she smiled.

Quinn joined her with a grin. "So how are we going to get to the airport?" She knew Rachel liked a good planning session and wanted to indulge her. "Are you feeling brave enough to take public transport with me or do we wimp out and get a cab?"

"I have arranged accessible transport with SuperShuttle. They are picking us up from here at four o'clock tomorrow afternoon and our flight is at seven. Dad is picking us up at the other end."

"I am impressed. How did you think that one up?"

"I have been doing my research," Rachel sighed as though Quinn didn't even need to ask.

The following afternoon, Rachel was already waiting for her outside her dorm building when Quinn rolled up the ramp after her last class of the day.

"I was watching out just in case they arrive early for us," she explained to the blonde.

"It's only three-thirty!"

"I prefer to be early than late," Rachel replied.

"It's one of your most endearing qualities, Rach." Rachel actually blushed at the compliment, which didn't go unnoticed by Quinn. "I just need to get my bag and do my thing in the bathroom."

Rachel nodded. "I'll wait here for you if you want."

"Actually can I be a pain and ask you to get my bag, it's a little heavy and the ramp isn't exactly shallow."

Rachel jumped with excitement at actually being allowed to get her bag. "Kurt should be here soon, he stopped off at the library for something to read on the plane, but promised he'd be here on time." Rachel followed Quinn into her room.

"I'll just be a couple of minutes," Quinn vanished into the bathroom.

Rachel was actually curious about what Quinn had to do, but respected her dignity too much to ask for details. It was part of the inexplicable fascination Rachel had when it came to the other girl. It had always been with her though, even when Quinn had seemingly hated her and so it wasn't something that had changed since they became friends or even since the accident. It was a compulsion on Rachel's part to understand the enigmatic former cheerleader. Somehow Rachel had always sought her approval and never knew why it mattered so much, but it did, even now their relationship was on an even footing. Rachel was nothing if not self-analytical and she had examined why this was the case on a multitude of occasions, but had never fully understood why Quinn mattered to her so much more than anyone else. It was a conundrum she was desperate to find an answer for, but before she could ask herself any more questions, the entry buzzer sounded.

"That must be Kurt, can you let him in?" Quinn shouted through to her.

"Of course," Rachel went to the door but was surprised to find Santana waiting. "You came," she smiled.

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever. Only because I want to help out Mr Schue with the brats. Where's Q?"

"Bathroom," Rachel nodded.

"Okay," Santana didn't say any more.

"Did you see Kurt," Rachel looked at her watch.

"Nope, I assume he's going to be late. That's assuming he has been able to pry his fingers apart from Michael's. I swear, they are gonna get gay-bashed if they keep walking hand-in-hand _everywhere_; they need to be a little more careful."

"I think it's cute. Besides weren't you the one who fought Figgins over the right to PDA whenever you want."

"Yeah, but I can take care of myself. Neither of those two could fight their way out of a paper bag, Rach and there are haters out there. Not everyone is as accepting as you."

Quinn emerged in the middle of the conversation and wondered what they were talking about but didn't have time to ask because Kurt arrived almost immediately and he made a fuss about Santana, whereas Quinn simply gave Rachel a knowing raised eyebrow.

With hindsight, taking Santana along to the airport could have been a mistake. She seemed quite happy that they were sent to the front of the check-in queue, were given seats at the front of the aircraft with extra leg-room for free and were expedited in through the VIP line at security. That was where things got a little stickier. Rachel knew what to expect having flown with Quinn before, but someone else in a wheelchair was in front of them, meaning Quinn had to wait quite a while to get called through. With the others waiting for her and watching on, Quinn had to take her shoes off to be sent through the X-ray machine, which took a while for her to unfasten. Santana then watched on in horror as the security officer proceeded to virtually molest her friend.

"Seriously, woman. Why is this necessary?" Santana shouted across to them.

"San, shut up. It's fine. It's just her job." Quinn was accustomed to it by now.

"Sorry this is not the nicest experience for you, I know." The security officer was apologetic. "Your friend doesn't sound very happy."

"She hasn't flown with me before. She's just not used to seeing this." Quinn gave the middle-aged woman a small smile. "She's a little over-protective at times."

"Can I check your back?"

Quinn nodded and leaned forwards with her hands on her knees. When the officer finished, Quinn sat back and allowed her legs to be checked. This drove San nuts.

"Seriously Kurt, can't you get your Dad to do something about this. The woman has her hands everywhere, look, under her boobs and even her fucking crotch!"

"Santana!" Rachel hissed. "You just make it worse by drawing attention to it. People are staring at Quinn, because you're making a fuss."

"Well someone should be pissed about this. Everyone else just gets to walk through the machine and she has to sit and get groped by grandma over there. It's not fair."

"Actually, other people get searched as well, San. If the scanner goes off you get the same treatment." Kurt didn't seem too worried.

"Yeah but that's because they were stupid and forgot they had their phone in a pocket or something, they don't get that treatment by default."

Rachel understood Santana's emotional response. Her's had been similar the first time she had flown with Quinn after the accident. It made her realize that it was no longer shocking to see Quinn treated differently, she had become accustomed to it.

"Quinn would have been asked if she wanted a screen around, San. She probably refused because it doesn't bother her anymore and it gets done quicker this way. She can stick up for herself you know?"

Santana looked disgruntled but stopped with the shouting out at least. She glowered at the security woman as she let Quinn go. Quinn took her boots from the tray and sat them on her knees. Rolling over to her friends Quinn was a little flushed. "Rach can you go through to Starbucks and get me a raspberry tea, please. I'll be there in a sec, just need to put my boots on. Kurt can you keep my bag until I get there? San you can give me a hand if you don't mind."

Rachel knew what Quinn was doing. She was going to diffuse the incendiary device that was Santana Lopez but didn't want to draw attention to the fact that was what she was doing. Rachel and Kurt pointed out where they were headed while Santana picked up the boots from her friends knees.

"You don't need help to put boots on," San huffed and sat on the seat in front of her friend.

"No, I can manage thanks."

"So you going to chew me out for embarrassing you. I know you are embarrassed 'cause your cheeks are red."

"I agree with your sentiment, but this is an airport and you don't screw around with security people in an airport," Quinn sighed. "But I'm not going to chew you out either. They always explain what they are doing and I don't have any choice about having them search me like that, but they offer privacy if I want it. The fuss of having to go to another room or wait for them to put a screen around is worse than the search, so I just let them get on with it. You don't need to get angry all the time about this sort of thing. Why are you always so angry?" Quinn lifted her foot and took a boot from Santana.

"I don't know. It just seems unfair."

"It's not unfair. It's just how things are sometimes." She fastened the lace while Santana loosened off the one on the other boot as she had seen Quinn do a moment earlier. When she had finished, she held it out. "I don't know if I can just swallow the frustration like you do."

"You could learn to be more patient, you know."

Santana huffed. "As if."

Quinn had an idea. "Remember the time Mr Schue had everyone spend a week in a wheelchair so we knew what Artie had to go through?"

Santana nodded. "It was embarrassing. Everyone thought we were even bigger losers," she spoke without thinking, then put her hand over her mouth as if she suddenly realized what she had said.

Quinn raised her eyes and just laughed at her. "Yeah but do you remember what it was actually like?"

"I didn't mind it so much when we were doing the dance thing. It was actually sort of fun."

"How about I remind you what it's like and you get a lesson in patience. You stay over at mine for the weekend and you spend the entire time in my spare chair?"

Santana looked surprised. "But I already did that."

"I know, but at the end of the day, we all left the chairs behind and walked away. I think you should actually have to do everything from it for two whole days, no cheating. That means when you take a shower, use the toilet, get dressed, everything."

Santana was thoughtful for a moment. "Okay, I can do that. Penance for embarrassing you."

"Pinky swear?" Quinn held out her hand, which San took and agreed. "Oh, we're going to Rachel's on Saturday for a Thanksgiving lunch, I forgot to mention that too."

Santana stared at her. "You wouldn't make me stay in it ….."

"Oh I would," Quinn gave her an evil grin.

"Damn, you are still HBIC."

"Yep. Just switch out the cheer for chair," Quinn breathed across her finger nails and rubbed them across her chest in victory.

Santana grumbled about being set up all the way home to Lima and then some more when she arrived at Quinn's on Friday morning. Quinn had the chair all ready for her to go in the hallway and made her sit in it as soon as she entered the house.

Judy came out to say hi to Santana and laughed when she saw the scowl on her face as she dropped into the chair.

"I think it's very good of you to keep a promise Santana," Judy sympathized as she gave her a hug.

"Hi Santana," a voice the dark haired girl hadn't heard in a long time spoke to her.

"Frannie, hey. How are you?" Santana looked up to see Quinn's lesser spotted elder sister.

"Good thanks. What are you doing though?"

"Your sister set me up royally because I got a bit hot under the collar at the airport," she groaned.

"It's not a punishment," Quinn laughed.

"Then you can stop smiling like some sort of evil genius at me!"

"We're going to school to see Mr Schue, Mom. We'll be back later."

"Drive safely," Judy said with sincerity.

Frannie's eyes snapped to her sister. "You didn't tell me!"

Quinn looked a little sheepish. "It's no big deal, I forgot."

"I don't know why I'm surprised. You always were stubborn." Frannie reached sideways and gave her younger sister a hug.

"Where are the rugrats?" Santana asked Frannie, knowing she had a husband and two children now.

"They went to the grocery store with their father, they'll be here when you get back."

Santana looked over at Quinn. "Okay come on, let's get on with this."

Quinn grinned again and rolled out of the door, followed by Santana who went at half the speed and efficiency.

Judy and Frannie watched them go.

"Quinn's really lucky to have such good friends," the younger woman told her mother.

"I think they're lucky to have her too. I worry about her so much, but then I watch how they all respect her and I realize that she knows how to take care of them as well as herself."

Frannie looked at her mother with surprise.

"She's changed a lot you know. She's not the spoilt brat she used to be when you were still at home."

"Do you know what I wish I'd done," Frannie had a wistful tone to her voice. "I wish I'd offered to take Beth before she gave her up."

"So do I, Frannie. More than anything. I don't know if that might have made it worse for her though."

"Does she talk about her much?"

"Never with me. I guess I'm the last person she would want to talk to about this."

"We screwed up, Mom. We all failed her."

"I know, that's why I'm trying to make it up to her now."

Santana meanwhile was sat in the wheelchair looking at Quinn for advice. It wasn't as though she hadn't seen her friend getting in and out of the car, but she wasn't familiar with exactly how to do it without cheating. "Why can't you just show me?" she whined.

"Because I am going to have to help you get the chair in as well," Quinn explained.

Santana grumbled again. "Well at least explain how."

"Okay, calm down. Take your left leg and lift it in, then move across by grabbing the handle above your head with your right hand." San did as she was asked. "Use your left hand to push down at the same time. Then pull your right leg in."

"It's not that hard," Santana said as she swung herself in.

"I keep telling you that," Quinn replied. She pushed herself to the back of the car and lifted the chair in without breaking it down. They were only going to school. She rolled around to her side and got in beside Santana and then had to fiddle with her chair to get it in the back seat. She almost took San's head off at one point with the frame.

The drive was uneventful and getting out at the other end was just a repeat. The pair met up with Rachel and Kurt in the car park before going into the building.

"Oh my gosh, I can't believe you actually went through with it," Rachel said to Santana when she saw her getting out of the car.

"Whatever," Santana said in reply. "Let's get in there before I change my mind. I can't believe I got suckered." Kurt just laughed as Santana went to go up the curb cut but got the front wheels caught where it was slightly uneven. "Laugh it up pretty boy, you're all going to have to do this if I stick it out; it's only fair."

"That's actually a pretty good idea," Rachel replied. "I for one wouldn't mind in the slightest. It would be a good reminder of what Quinn has to go through each day. I am proud of you for not backing out."

"Thanks," came the mumbled reply.

They went into the building and unfortunately for Santana, the first person they bumped into was Sue Sylvester. "Well, well, well. If it isn't my favorite former Gleeks. Porcelain, how's my little fashion victim? And if it isn't Barbara Streisand's secret love child and her ever present companion, Q. But what have we here. Tell me you haven't taken a header off that bar I believe you work on and sprained an ankle. Sandbags, I despair. I go to all that trouble to arrange for you to go to the third best cheerleading college in the country and this is how I am rewarded. You go all handicapable on me as well."

"Hi, Coach." Quinn replied for all of them. "We've missed you too," she went to give her a hug. Sue's very long arms reached around the blonde girls shoulders and gave her a firm squeeze. "Don't worry about Santana, she's fine. She decided to undertake an educational experiment to see just how much patience is required to live in a wheelchair." Quinn grinned a stellar smile at San and the darker girl rolled her eyes, but also blushed a little, knowing that Quinn would be proud of her at the end of it as well.

They chatted briefly to Sue but then insisted on going to find Will Schuester. They found him in his classroom grading papers.

"Surprise!" they yelled, giving him a start. Will put his hand on his heart as he realized who was at his door.

"Guys, you came." He stood and though slightly perplexed at Santana's appearance, he greeted them all with a hug. "You have some explaining to do, Ms Lopez."

"Oh please. I should just wear a T-shirt with 'does my butt look big in this?' across the front! I might have displayed some unhappiness at how my girl, Q was treated by a security officer at LaGuardia yesterday evening and this is my reward."

"I'm not going to ask any more details. I take it you went a little 'Lima Heights' as you are so fond of saying?"

"She did, but we're here to help Mr Schue," Rachel intervened.

"I'll fill you in later, but tell me about New York first. I'm dying to hear all about it so far."

Will's head was spinning by the time Rachel and Kurt had finished telling them all about it. Santana was a bit more brief as she had only just arrived in comparison.

"And how are things going for you, Quinn?" he asked.

"Good. I'm enjoying my classes and I joined the theatre group so we are preparing for a review show at Christmas. I am doing a monologue piece as well as contributing to the show choir. I also joined the swim team, made some new friends, of course they aren't as nice as my old friends," she waved her hands at the other three who all laughed, "but I found settling in easier than I thought."

"You all look great," he commented. "While I remember, can you let me have your addresses in New York, Emma and I will be sending out wedding invites shortly and we want you all to be there."

"Mr Schue, have you heard from Finn at all?" Kurt was increasingly worried about him. There was still no word of his whereabouts.

"I'm sorry, Kurt, but I haven't heard anything since he got posted to Fort Bragg."

Kurt's shoulders slumped. "I wish he would just text one of us and let us know he's okay."

"I hope so too, he is supposed to be my best man," Will replied.

The four of them entered the choir room to a lot of chatter and several familiar faces. Artie looked up first when he heard the familiar sound of wheels rolling in the corridor.

"Quinn!" he rolled straight alongside her and they shared a long hug. "What happened to Santana, did she fall in cheerleading or something?" he asked nervously. He looked over to find Brittany already sat in Santana's lap.

"Shut up, Artie. I never fall!" Santana approached him and gave him a hug from the other side. "It's a learning experience, ask Q."

"Don't mind her," Quinn responded. "I'm making her do forty eight hours in the chair as penance."

"I won't ask what you did," Artie said sincerely. "It must have been bad. Come and meet everyone else."

The other familiar faces came and shared hugs all round while the new members of Glee looked on at the strange group who just entered. They had seen the photos of course and recognized some of them, but there did seem to be a lot of wheelchairs in the room all of a sudden.

There was also a little awkwardness between Sam and Santana. She didn't even call him Trouty which was weird. It had been her term of endearment for him in the past. There was also a strained look between Kurt and Blaine.

Mr Schue quieted everyone and introduced the newer members of the club. Quinn looked at the only other girl besides Brit wearing a Cheerios uniform. Her name was Kitty. Quinn didn't remember her, but then she hadn't actually got to perform last year. The girl just looked like a bitch, there was no doubting it. He also then introduced the four of them and explained that they were here to support the club with some advice about how to work together and get their performance up to scratch for sectionals. "So guys, off you go to the auditorium and get ready," the curly haired teacher instructed. He then escorted his guests to the back of the stalls to watch what they had so far.

All four of them were impressed by Marley's voice. "She's no Rachel Berry, but she's good," Santana commented after the first number. "Baby Puck's not bad either."

"Kitty reminds me so much of me it's frightening," Quinn said.

"She looks a little scary," Rachel replied turning to her friend.

"Exactly," Quinn quirked an eyebrow.

"She's a work in progress," Mr Schue responded.

"Definitely like me then," Quinn chuckled.

After the performance Quinn went to find Sue's latest protégé.

"Oh my gosh, you're Quinn Fabray," Kitty oozed charm and sweetness, but it had no effect on the older girl.

"In the flesh, wheels and all," Quinn looked up and somehow felt that Kitty had the advantage on her because of her recently diminished stature. "Let's sit down and talk."

Kitty trailed after the legendary former cheerleader. "I am so glad to meet you finally. The older girls worship you and I saw your page in the yearbook. You're really inspiring."

Quinn was a little flattered, but still recognized how much Kitty thought of herself in relation to the others in Glee. "So why did you join the club?"

"I really like dancing and singing, though I'm not the best singer."

"Did Mr Schue ask you to join?"

"No," Kitty looked away briefly. "I signed up myself."

"Really? So no influence from Coach Sylvester either?"

"Hmm, she might have mentioned something to me about it," again her eyes flickered away.

Quinn knew exactly what had happened.

"Listen Kitty. I know you think that being a Cheerio is about the best thing in the world. You get all the attention from the cute guys and you wear the uniform that protects you from any bullying – I get that makes high school easier. I was once where you were and thought it was really important. Then something bad happens and you lose that protection and the other cheerleaders will pretty much do anything to get to the top so they stab you in the back. The only real friends you will have will be those in Glee. They don't judge or bully, they don't make you be someone you're not. I get the impression that you're not as invested as you make out. If that's the case, drop the act and leave Glee. Don't mess with them, because as you know, you might be the next big thing, but I will always be the ultimate HBIC and that means if you undermine Mr Schue's work, I will hunt you down and make you cry, little girl. Do you understand?"

Kitty looked stunned and simply nodded. She had heard about Santana Lopez's famous temper and rumors that Quinn Fabray was even scarier, but she had never been picked apart so easily. "How did you know I was lying?"

"Please, don't insult my intelligence. You are as transparent as a pane of glass. If you really want to leave a legacy at this school, you have to be yourself and certainly don't pretend to be me because the me you're trying to be was a coward and a manipulative bitch, which doesn't amount to much." With that Quinn turned and left a stunned Kitty to lick her wounds.


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee

Chapter 15

Later that evening Santana was at Quinn's house. They had eaten dinner and it had been refreshing to see a completely sober Judy Fabray. It was a change from the times Santana had been round their house when they were younger. Frannie too was happier than the Latina remembered. She and Quinn had played with her niece and nephew who were still too young to understand what had happened to their aunt and so didn't really worry too much about the wheelchairs. When the toddlers were safely away in bed upstairs, the two friends retired to watch a movie with Frannie. Frannie's husband had some work to do, so excused himself – Quinn thought it might have been the thought of watching a chick-flick - and Judy left the girls alone to go do chores.

Frannie watched as Quinn showed her friend how she had to get onto the sofa from the wheelchair. Her heart was a little bruised from what had happened to her little sister. Knowing that she hadn't really had a chance to live her life fully before the accident made it harder as well. The older woman lifted her arm so Quinn could slip underneath it and lean against her. Santana repeated the move and sat beside her friend.

"Comfy?" she asked the younger women.

Santana seemed happy enough, but Quinn as usual was fiddling around with her legs which refused to stay together and slumped apart at the knee. She used Frannie's knee to pull herself forward and then lifted her feet up onto the seat of her chair which was parked in front of her. She then allowed herself to fall back into the sofa and the comfort of her sister's embrace.

"I don't even remember the last time we did this, Fran."

"Me either, it's been too long." Frannie watched as Quinn reached forwards and tugged at her legs again. "Look, why don't you lean against Santana and put your legs up here if that's better."

"It's okay, I want to snuggle with you for a change, I see San all the time."

Santana rolled her eyes. "Gimme," she waved at Quinn's legs. "You have to move them though 'cause I'd have to cheat to reach over there." Quinn turned and gave her a grin. "Stop mooning at me and lift 'em up here," she scooted a bit closer to Quinn and patted her lap.

The younger blonde woman reached forwards again and lifted down her legs, then used her hands to turn her hips towards the bossy Latina. "I don't want to make you uncomfortable though," she spoke quietly as she dropped her right ankle in Santana's lap.

"Just hurry up will you the film's about to start!" Santana reached forwards to take the left ankle next and straightened Quinn's uncooperative legs a little so she had her shoulders buried into her sister and her legs over the top of Santana's. "They're a bit cold Q," she noted as her hands removed the favorite Doc Martin boots.

Quinn just shrugged. "Rubbish circulation when I sit all day."

"Did you use the standing frame today?" her sister asked.

Quinn sighed. "No."

"Quinn!"

"Don't nag okay, you have no idea how boring it is Fran."

"Yeah, but the doctor said …" Frannie didn't get to finish.

"I feel trapped and claustrophobic as well," her sister's voice was quieter. "It's like when I woke up in the hospital and couldn't move or get up all over again. I know it's good for me, but it's also really hard to not want to cry each time; I am always reminded of how limited I really am without my chair." Quinn looked up at her neat little titanium wheelchair. She often got comments, usually from kids on the street, of 'cool wheels' when she popped a wheelie to drop off a curb or similar. She thought back to how much she resented it at first and even though it was only nine months since the crash, somehow it was such an important part of her life and even her identity now that the resentment had faded and she was beginning appreciate just how much easier it made her life. What would she be able to do without such an amazing piece of engineering? She saw other people less fortunate than she was in terrible wheelchairs that looked old or heavy, and honestly, much less cool than hers and felt a bit of guilt that she had hated it so much when it had arrived beside her bed to replace the one the hospital had let her use. She loved her chair a little more every day; it was after all, her freedom now.

"I'm sorry, sis. I didn't mean to patronize you. I have no idea how you managed to get through this. I'm really proud of you." Frannie gave her sister a huge squeeze. Leaning over she held her hand up to Santana for a high five as well. "Kudos to you for doing this as well, San. I think it's awesome how supportive you and Quinn's other friends have been."

"We only put up with her so she can help us with our homework," Santana's eyes narrowed and a cheeky grin spread across her face. "Ow!" She rubbed her arm where Quinn had leaned across and punched her. "you don't even know your own strength these days," she scowled.

"I don't know why I put up with you. You are the rudest human being I know, and there were plenty to choose from at McKinley."

"As if I could match you. I heard what you said to Kitty. You know that little witch has Marley throwing up to lose weight just because her Mom's a little heavy."

"I'm not surprised – I told you she was a lot like me."

Santana followed Quinn's instruction yet again on how to get into bed this time. It was actually a bit weird to lift her legs up onto the bed and then start shuffling around using her hands to get comfortable. Quinn waited until Santana was settled before moving onto the bed herself.

"I'm exhausted," the dark girl muttered. "I don't remember it being this much hard work when we used the chairs in Glee."

"We were able to get up and walk away after three hours," Quinn reminded her.

"It's really weird to think we did that and now…"

"I'm stuck in one permanently?"

Santana nodded. "I thought about what it would be like, you know, when we did it, but I never imagined it would happen to any of us. I mean what are the odds? Artie and then you."

"I thought about it too. But you what, it was fun. Singing 'Proud Mary' and popping wheelies with Artie was a good way to learn not to be afraid of someone in a wheelchair; I think I was a little before. Still didn't think I would ever need one though."

"Does it drive you crazy that I can just stand up and walk off anytime I want?"

"No, not even a little bit. I'm glad that you don't really know what being paralyzed feels like and I hope you never do. I don't resent other people their ability to walk. As much as I can get frustrated by it sometimes, I think eventually I will be happy with myself again. It's not easy to explain, but I sort of am a bit proud of myself in a way I never was before. When everything came easily and I just put out my hand and got what I wanted, I never really felt any sense of satisfaction and always wanted more. I don't think that I understood pain until I had to give up Beth and I don't think I understood what it meant to achieve something amazing until we won nationals and I had to work so hard to keep up with the dancing when the chair was still so new. I was pretty much panicking the whole time, until Rachel and I sang the final number and then somehow I just relaxed."

"I cried virtually every time you sang that. I just kept thinking of the words and what you must have been thinking as you sung them. It was the best performance you ever gave, probably because it meant a lot to everyone that you survived and got stronger every day."

Quinn squeezed Santana's hand. "I know you hate getting all mushy, so thanks for saying that."

"It's okay. I don't mind getting mushy on you. Are you comfy?"

Quinn was on her side as usual, pillow between her knees and Santana spooned her from behind. "Very. I love sharing with you, you make me feel safe, which is surprising considering what a skinny little rabbit you really are. I can't believe you had the whole of McKinley quaking when you aren't much taller than Rach."

"I gots a lotta attitude,Q!" Santana put on her thickest Lima Heights accent. "Now shut up and sleep, you are so going in the frame tomorrow morning whether you like it or not. I'll just have to entertain you so you don't get bored."

Quinn grumbled briefly but was soon suffering from heavy eyelids and drifted off.

"You might hate it, but surely it's nice to feel tall again," Santana was practicing wheelies in Quinn's funky little wheelchair instead of the spare she was using, which wasn't quite so flashy. "This one is so much easier to use, I think I should get this one as the novice and you have the other one."

Quinn's eyebrow rose. "Not happening."

She was strapped into the standing frame eating breakfast and laughing at Santana's efforts to keep her balance on the back wheels alone. "God, you make this look so easy and you can't even feel your ass."

"That's because I've spent the last eight months and five days in a wheelchair and you've had twenty-four hours in it."

"Yeah but I'm talented so this should be easier." Santana was watching her reflection in Quinn's full length mirror which freaked her out a bit.

Quinn's phone buzzed as a text came through. She looked at it and crinkled her nose in thought. "Message from Rach."

"What does she want at this time of the morning?"

"This is Rachel we're talking about; she'll have been up since dawn." Quinn shrugged. "She's just checking that we are still going for lunch, but says to bring Mom, Frannie, Robert and the little ones."

"Her Dad's do love to host."

After two hours, Quinn couldn't take any more of the frame, despite the pair having entertained each other. "Get your butt outa my chair and bring it here, San."

Her friend switched wheelchairs and then scooted the expensive one over to the corner of the room where the frame had Quinn suspended. As she lowered the seat, Santana put a hand out and touched the bare leg of her pale friend, who was still wearing her PJ shorts.

"Better," she commented with a satisfied look on her face. "Definitely much warmer than last night."

"It's always worse when I get out of the chair after a long day, but don't stress. I have meds for my blood pressure."

Santana scowled. "You're only supposed to get them when you're old and wrinkly."

"Yeah, well. It beats being six feet under."

"Still sucks though," Santana pouted.

"Stop being so over-protective."

"No. Never. In fact I can guarantee it for the rest of your life."

Quinn rolled her eyes and as she finally slid across to her chair, she reached out and pulled Santana alongside her and gave her a hug. It was always a little awkward hugging someone else in a wheelchair, but at least for once they were on eye level. She felt Santana pull her really tight and let herself fall into the other girl. When she eventually let her go, Quinn had to force her body back into the chair.

"I need to go do my thing in the bathroom before we go out, so go play with the kids or something. I'll be a while."

"I can wait here for you. Leave the door open a crack and we can talk."

"San," Quinn protested. "It's fine. I am used to this remember. Just go do something. I don't need a babysitter."

"I know. But it's got to be a bit boring, you know, waiting for it to happen. I was just going to entertain you some more with my stunning personality and witty banter." Quinn turned away, but felt a hand on her shoulder. "I know what goes on in there and I don't care. You don't have to be embarrassed about this in front of me, or any of your friends for that matter."

Quinn froze a moment. The one thing she had never discussed with anyone apart from the nurses who taught her how to manage, was dealing with her paralyzed bladder and bowels. Although she was used to managing this herself, the thought of talking about it with anyone else horrified her.

"What do you mean when you say you know what goes on?" The blonde girl didn't turn to face her friend, her cheeks were red.

"I can read, Q. We looked stuff up about your injury on the internet when you were in the hospital. We all did. We wanted to understand. That's why none of us ever made a big deal about you vanishing to the bathroom for ages."

"When you say 'we', which 'we' are we talking about?"

"Me, Rach, Mercedes, Kurt, Sam, not Brit though; we didn't want to upset her. We asked Artie where to look and he helped us understand. So we know, and we don't care, and we still love you. I'll go because I think that's what you want, but you don't have worry about this with us. Sorry I didn't mention it before."

The whole conversation took place with Quinn's back turned and she was trying to muster the courage to turn and look at her friend for being so supportive, but she heard Santana spin and roll towards the door. She was grateful for not having to talk about it anymore, but also relieved that they knew in a way. She would never have been able to start a conversation with 'guess what, I have to wear rubber gloves to take a dump now', or 'I pee through a tube these days' on her return to school. It was bad enough that she had to do these things manually because they didn't happen automatically with her level of injury, but still it was something that most teenagers would have found mortifyingly embarrassing to discuss. But they knew, the most important people in her life and they didn't care.


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: Still not owning Glee

Chapter 16

Arriving at Rachel's just after midday, Santana was already complaining about her shoulders aching but she still rolled up to the front door with Quinn's niece on her knees, pretending to be a train. They had arrived in two cars and the last out was Quinn. Eventually they were all in the large living room, LeRoy was pouring out drinks and true to form, was talking about Rachel, who was not in the slightest embarrassed to hear her father praising her. LeRoy was also happy to see Quinn though and gave her a huge hug and the warmest of welcomes. "We need a little chat at some point with your Mom this afternoon." He sounded a little conspiratorial.

Hiram, true to form emerged from the kitchen with an apron that bore the phrase, 'cooked, burned or cremated?' on the front, which entertained everyone. Judy introduced her older daughter and her family and they all sat to make small-talk until the food was ready.

It was no surprise that lunch was amazing and the conversation flowed constantly. Rachel and her fathers were excellent hosts and they always ensured there was something to talk about so there was never an awkward silence; Quinn always like being there because of that. She had grown up in a house where there were strict rules about everything and her place was firmly at the bottom. Conversations were limited to those which were morally acceptable to her father and there was a long list of taboo subjects. Rachel's house was the complete opposite. Nothing was regulated and Rachel had been treated as an equal by her dads.

With food over, LeRoy pulled Quinn and Judy aside in the den, away from everyone else. He asked Judy to sit and announced that he had some news.

"I know we've spoken a few times Quinn in the last couple of months and I have been batting back offers from the truck driver's insurance company and that of the trucking company. As you know, we already agreed the settlement for the minor reparations to replace your car and cleared the medical expenses, but I received an improved offer from the companies involved, which agrees that they will share the remaining settlement costs. The trucking company admitted the driver had contacted them about the brakes being a little spongy and the driver admitted he knew they weren't operating as they should. There was also an admittance from the company that they had requested the driver complete his job before returning the truck for repair. As that was all documented, both insurance companies have agreed to split the compensation equally between them provided you agree to make no further claim in the future for additional compensation. They will pay the compensation in two installments, one as soon as you agree to the terms and the other in two years' time, once medical records show there has been little or no significant improvement in the level of your disability. This is the revised offer, and accepting it will mean no lengthy court proceedings and my costs will have been minimal as well. I think it's still a little light, but if we push much further in a recession, they may decide it's worth risking a court case for. That was the impression I got when I spoke to their legal representative a few days ago."

LeRoy handed a folded letter to Quinn. She took it and couldn't stop her hand shaking. Looking at Judy, who nodded for her to go ahead, Quinn unfolded the letter and scanned the contents. As LeRoy had summed up the terms, she skipped over the details and got to the sums of money, they looked ridiculous to an eighteen-year-old.

"Five point nine million dollars?" Quinn stared at the number. It was laughable. She couldn't even imagine that amount of money. It was ridiculous.

"Oh, honey!" Judy grabbed her daughter across the shoulders and pulled her tight. "I am so relieved. I don't have to worry so much about the future now and you don't have to worry about not being financially independent."

Quinn could barely speak.

LeRoy interrupted her thoughts. "Sorry I didn't say anything sooner, but I thought as we had lunch planned it was a perfect was to celebrate a conclusion to this part of your life. The worst is over and you can just plan your future now without having to worry about all those expenses that your injury brings."

She still couldn't speak but as her mother released her grasp, Quinn immediately rolled forwards and hugged him.

"Thank you so much," she croaked, her throat was constricted and the tears started almost immediately from the relief of the situation. She had been dreading going to court and being paraded in front of a judge to give evidence that would no doubt entail having to paint a pitiful picture of herself. Not having to go through that was worth sacrificing some financial gain. All this money seemed unreal anyway.

"You haven't had my bill yet," he chuckled. "You know what charlatans we lawyers are."

"I know you'll be fair, so it's all good. I don't have to go to court?"

"Nope, no court."

"Then we accept. Mom, that's okay isn't it? I didn't even ask if you're okay with it."

"I am more than okay if it's what you want to do."

"I can finally pay you back for all the things done to the house."

"Let's not worry about that for now, let's go celebrate. I think we have some Moet in the chiller." LeRoy bounced out of the room. He was delighted with the settlement and glad he didn't have to drag Rachel's friend to court over something that wasn't her fault.

"Shall we go break the news to your friends?" Judy asked her still shell-shocked daughter.

"I guess so," she could still hardly take it all in. she thought back to what she had been through and it seemed to have been such a hard thing to come to terms with and money couldn't undo all that. She would much rather none of this had happened, but at least now she could relax about finances. It was a palpable sense of relief that she felt rather than happiness. If Quinn had learned anything lately, it was that you cannot buy happiness.

Quinn rolled into the room and the conversations stopped to look at her and Judy right behind. She could feel her mother's hands on each shoulder for reassurance. It was nice to have this version of her mother, rather than the one she had experienced in her earlier teenage years who cowered to her over-bearing husband's sense of morality and then got slammed to hide from the fact that she was a coward.

"I er … have some good news." Quinn's eyebrows rose to emphasize the good. A nervous smile appeared on her face. Rachel looked at her with a hugely eager face and she wondered if LeRoy had already told his daughter all about it.

"What is it?" Rachel asked unable to hold the urgency from her tone.

Santana simply tilted her head as if to say 'get on with it'.

Her sister and brother-in-law smiled expectantly.

"LeRoy just told me that we got a good compensation offer from the insurance companies for my accident," she turned to look at her mother, wondering if she should tell them how much. Judy smiled warmly and nodded. "It's er … nearly six million dollars." Quinn didn't move, but neither did anyone else for about two seconds, each of them feeling like a minute as time seemed to slow and the realization spread across the face of the individuals in the room.

Then they erupted.

Rachel actually jumped on top of her in excitement and kept repeating the phrase, "Oh my God," over and over.

Santana literally bounced out of the sofa and wrapped her arms around both Rachel and Quinn together, jumping and hugging at the same time made her feel a little queasy but what the hell and it was a good ten minutes before Quinn reminded her about their agreement and she sulked back over to the wheelchair.

It took some time for everyone to quiet down, there was cheering, screaming, shouting, dancing, drinking (apart from Judy) and endless chatter. In the end, Judy shepherded her elder daughter and her family out the door to take the little ones home and left her younger daughter and friends to party on a little more. Rachel was soon on the phone to their other friends to call round and hear the good news about Quinn from the girl herself. Kurt arrived first, surprisingly with Blaine in tow. Brittany came round just after them and finally Sam arrived with Joe. Strangely, the awkwardness was no longer present between the tangled web of relationships that had existed between them all – they were there to enjoy Quinn's survival and good news. Artie was at his grandmother's house and couldn't get there until later but promised he would call and see Quinn as soon as he could. Puck followed Rachel on Facebook and saw a post about good news for Quinn and called her.

"Hey Babymomma!" he said brightly, knowing she wouldn't complain. "I hear big congrats are due."

"Thanks, Puck. How are you?"

"Great, I just got to my Mom's house for Thanksgiving and now I have more things to give thanks for. I'll call round later okay, I need to eat with Mom and my baby sister first."

"Okay, thanks for calling, see you soon." Quinn smiled as she flicked her phone off. "Puck's coming over later," she told Rachel.

LeRoy and Hiram had tastefully withdrawn from the living room to give the teenagers some space.

They were all so excited and eager to know what Quinn was going to do with the money. "Are you going to have like a mega blow-out?" Sam asked her.

She shook her head. "No, though I would like to do something nice for everyone, like maybe a party or something, just to thank them for the support. Rachel's dad helped me with a plan a while back for when the settlement got made. I have to invest most of it so that it will support me for pretty much the rest of my life if I can't get work and stuff. I need to pay Mom back a lot as well, you know all the work to the house. It cost a lot of money to get everything fixed up for me to come home. I know it sounds like a lot of cash but it gets eaten up pretty quick with expenses and stuff. I don't even know how much will actually be left."

"Well you deserve every penny," Sam gave her shoulder a squeeze.

The others agreed unanimously.

Finn pulled up outside Rachel's to find a lot of other cars. He recognized Kurt's but the rest were unfamiliar, apart from LeRoy's, which as sat nearest the house.

Wondering if he was intruding on celebrations, he almost drove off, but steeled himself instead. He needed to see her at least, before he left again.


	17. Chapter 17

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee

Chapter 17

The doorbell rang and Rachel jumped up excitedly. "That's probably Artie," she skipped off to the door.

Finn shuffled from one foot to the other as he saw the familiar outline of his ex-girlfriend through the frosted glass panel in the door. He took a deep breath and held it.

"Just coming!" Her voice echoed in the hallway, but then she stopped. The shadow being cast against the glass wasn't Artie for sure, the person on the other side was standing. A shiver passed along her spine and down her knees as an unfamiliar sound came out of her throat. It wasn't a scream or a yell, it was more of a strangled noise as she recognized the stance.

Quinn was always sensitive to anything Rachel said and the minute she heard the strange noise echoing into the room from the hallway, she knew something was wrong. "San, something's off with Rachel." She nodded towards the door and started rolling backwards from the group.

Santana was instantly ahead of her, jumping out of the wheelchair, forgetting her promise and running. She saw Rachel almost frozen where she stood in the hallway and beyond the same familiar shadow.

"Oh boy!" She slipped past Rachel and nodded to Quinn to do something. Quinn also knew that outline and held a breath before simply slipping her hand inside the petite girl's to reassure her.

Santana opened the door and gasped herself. The stance was familiar but Finn Hudson had changed since they had seen him at graduation. The man, and she had to admit that he now looked like a man rather than a boy, stood before her with a stupid grin but his buzz cut hair and chin stubble was a long way from the clean-cut image he had always carried through high school.

Finn was in fatigues, the familiar khaki and grey camouflage of the US Army. His boots were shiny and she could see that he was in good shape, the puppy fat she had teased him about was history. The Finn Hudson in front of her couldn't realistically be called 'Douhgboy' any more.

"Finnocence!" She grinned, reaching up to give him a hug.

"Hey Santana, how've ya been?"

"Good," she tugged his hand to draw him across the threshold.

Rachel was looking down, afraid to see what Finn looked like, but she could almost feel him staring at her. For her part, the knee-length skirts were largely a thing of the past and she was wearing a short, slim-fitting black dress for the occasion. She too looked older than when they had last seen each other.

Santana's gaze met Quinn's briefly but she didn't get a clue as to what to say from her blonde friend; she looked just as surprised.

"Hey Quinn," he grinned and knelt beside her chair so she could give him a hug without straining her neck. "You look real good."

"It's good to see you too, stranger. Oh wait a minute I recognize you now, didn't we go to high school together?" Quinn teased him.

The dimples in Finn's cheeks showed as he gave her a sheepish grin. "Sorry, I haven't had much free time. They've been keeping me pretty busy." He blushed as he realized how long he had been out of touch.

"They do have modern forms of communication at Fort Bragg I believe. You must have heard of email, phones, Facebook," she shrugged and laughed at his embarrassment. Quinn tugged at Rachel's hand, but the short girl's eyes were closed and she was refusing to look up. Taking Finn's hand from her own knee where it was resting, she pulled him back up to his feet and then connected his hand with Rachel's. She looked at Santana and indicated they should give them a moment alone. "You're not supposed to cheat!" the blonde complained.

"It was an emergency you said," Santana huffed and followed her back into the living room.

Finn laughed at them and then looked down on the top of the brunette head bowed before him. "Aren't you going to say hello?" He squeezed her hand.

The head shook from side to side slowly.

"Why not? I came all this way to see you and now you won't open your eyes, let alone speak to me."

Rachel's eyelids didn't budge, but she did speak. "I don't know what to say. I'm annoyed with you." Her voice was little more than a squeak.

"What did I do to upset you, we haven't even spoken for almost five months."

"Exactly!" she spluttered. "I didn't know if you were okay or not, I was worried about you."

"Rach, open your eyes and look at me. I'm standing right in front of you and I'm fine."

Rachel opened her eyes and found herself looking down at black boots and khaki cargo pants. She moved her head up slowly taking in the trim hips and broad chest that she knew so well. When her eyes eventually saw the face of the boy she had once loved so much, she gasped. He looked like Finn, but already he was changed. His face was bronzed and his short hair was sort of blond around the edges from the sun. The hair on his face was a bit of a shock, he obviously hadn't shaved in a couple of days or so.

"Hi," he said, his eyes crinkling into a smile as Rachel finally looked into them.

"Hi," she responded, a look of surprise still evident as he pulled her into a hug. She turned her head to the side and leaned it on his chest. It was familiar but definitely firmer than she remembered.

"Sorry for dropping in unannounced, but I wasn't sure you would be home for the holidays or still in New York." His husky voice at least was unchanged.

"That's alright, we didn't know you would be on leave or you would have been invited. No one knew how to reach you since you haven't been responding to any of our messages." She looked into his face again for an answer to the unasked question: why?

"Yeah, sorry about that too. I needed to just find myself and so I switched my cell phone off the day I arrived in Fort Bragg and didn't turn it back on again until a couple of days ago. Are you having a Thanksgiving party? I didn't know so if I'm intruding, I can go."

"No, don't be silly. Everyone will want to see you, especially Kurt. He's been worried about you too. Have you seen your Mom yet?"

He shook his head. "I'm going to go over there when I leave here."

"You look really good, Finn. All grown up."

He laughed. "That was kinda the point in joining up. You look amazing too."

"Come on," she pulled him towards the living room. "We're celebrating for Quinn today. She just got the news from Dad that the insurance companies have settled in her favor."

"That's awesome, so it's all finished now?"

"As soon as the money is transferred, I guess. She didn't have to go to court so it's a big relief for her. She got nearly six million dollars."

"Wow!" Finn thought he was hearing things. "That's incredible. I mean it was a horrible thing she went through, but I'm pleased that she won't have to worry about money from now on."

He didn't get a chance to say much after that because Kurt virtually leapt on him.

It was a while later after he explained what he had been doing through his basic training and catching up with all their news. Artie had finally arrived and Finn was cornered by him for a while to catch up. Sam, Joe and Brittany all left, feeling that Rachel would probably want some time alone with Finn now that he was home. Quinn and Santana both offered to leave as well, but Rachel wouldn't allow them to go.

"Please don't," she begged. "I'm not ready to be left alone with him just yet. Besides Artie only just got here."

Blaine and Kurt were deep in conversation across the room and eventually came over to Rachel holding hands. "We're going to go get some coffee at the Lima Bean. I can see him at home later," Kurt nodded over his shoulder at his stepbrother.

Rachel knew her housemate and Blaine had reconnected over the weekend. "Okay. We'll talk later though, right?"

"Thanks for having us over, Rachel." Blaine gave her a hug. "Quinn, congrats again. I'm so happy that this has all worked out in your favor." He turned and gave the blonde girl a kiss on each cheek. "New York style," he grinned. "I'm practicing for next year."

"Thanks Blaine. Perhaps we'll you see you there a little more next semester?"

He gave her a knowing grin and the two gave their farewell to Santana and Finn before going out the door.

Realizing he hadn't been paying much attention to the girls, Finn and Artie turned to face them after the two other boys left. Artie rolled over to Santana, peering over the top of his glasses.

"Exactly what did you do to end up being punished in this way? He asked her, finally able to get a chance to talk in detail.

Santana rolled her eyes at having to explain yet again.

Rachel went to the sofa and indicated for Finn to sit beside her. They fell into an easy conversation about life in New York. "How have you and Kurt been getting along?" Finn asked. "I'm glad you are sharing, I know you're both safe that way."

"That's really sweet, but you don't have to worry. Beside Santana is living with us now too, so I think we are beyond safe." Rachel explained what had happened.

"Why is Santana sitting in a wheelchair?" He asked. Rachel laughed and told him about the airport. "So Quinn is having her revenge, I would expect no less from Queen Fabray."

"Quinn's been amazing actually. She's recovered so well and has made lots of new friends. You won't know this because she's too modest these days, but she made the swim team at Columbia."

"Really, that's awesome. She looks really different, I mean not her face and stuff, but she looks happier than I remember."

"She is for the most part. I mean, I think she would still rather be walking than having to use a wheelchair, but now that she's learned to live with it, she's happier with herself than she ever was at school and that means it's nice to be around her now. We've all learned a lot about life from her lately." Rachel looked over at Quinn who was teasing Santana, much to Artie's amusement.

"It's hard to believe that those two are pretty much your best friends now huh? I remember the way they used to treat you in Sophomore year." He shook his head embarrassed that he hadn't done more to protect Rachel from them back then.

"Everyone has changed and grown up. Quinn's living in a dorm on campus, but I'm hoping she might agree to share with us next year. She's kind of getting used to using the bus and stuff so it shouldn't be as hard. Have you seen her arms now, they're really strong and she can pretty much get everywhere in her chair. I panic a little when she wants to try stuff out for the first time, she says she's going to learn how to get up and down escalators next, but she's great at just sort of asking us when she needs a hand. She's still Quinn, only much nicer and more open. And she feels safe enough with us all now to be honest about her feelings; I guess we've all learned to live with and even love each other's idiosyncrasies."

"I'm not sure I know what that word even means, but I'm glad. You seem to have calmed Santana and made Quinn more human. Not sure I know how, but its impressive."

Finn had been desperate to see Rachel and the part of him that was still immature and a bit selfish wanted her to have missed him and still been in love with him. He didn't know if it was the distance created between them, but he knew that Rachel was no longer his. It was easy to see that she had done exactly what he had said he wanted for her; she had moved on. In truth, the mature part of him was glad but Finn the boy was a little gutted that she hadn't been pining for him. At least now he knew the truth though, being in New York, married to Rachel, would have been a mistake. It would have ruined their lives. Neither would have been happy, just as their friends had suggested. Part of him would always love Rachel, that bit of teenage Finn that still lurked inside him, but the more adult part of him knew that their futures would be apart and they were destined only to see each other as they were now, at reunions.

Finn noted that Rachel spent most of their conversation looking at or talking about the blonde girl sitting casually in her chair and currently poking Santana in the ribs. Occasionally he caught Quinn looking over at the two of them and smiling, properly this time; in the past her fake smile had always stopped before reaching her eyes. It was her eyes that eventually gave away the truth back when she had been pregnant. He remembered how she had stood in front of him; that freaked him out a bit, the thought of Quinn standing. Her voice indicated panic and that was the first time he had ever heard that. Her voice was still the most beautiful he had ever heard, when she spoke, it was like velvet, smooth and warm. Apart from when she was pissed, then it was just plain scary. But he had never heard panic in her voice before. It was the recognition that suddenly her carefully orchestrated plan was falling apart and she had been found out. He sought the truth not in her voice, but her eyes and it had been revealed. From then on, he always knew if she was being honest or not through reading her eyes.

He and Rachel talked some more while Artie left with a goodbye wave, leaving him alone with the three girls. The other two rolled over towards the sofa to join the former couple.

"So how's Army life?" Quinn asked him.

He nodded. "Good. I finished training a couple of weeks ago and I got some leave before my first posting, so I thought I should get home for Thanksgiving at least before Mom disowns me. She wasn't happy about my decision so I figure I am in for a roasting when I get home."

"You better keep in touch from now on or I'll set San on you."

He grinned at her. "I will, that's a promise. I heard from Rachel about the settlement. I'm really pleased for you. This year must have been so hard, I'm glad things are settled now."

"Thanks. I'm just glad to be alive and in college like I planned to be."

He nodded. "I meant what I said earlier too. You look great. Being happy suits you."

She was a little embarrassed, but in a good way. Tucking a stray bit of hair behind her ear, she thanked him. "I've had plenty of help from my friends," she muttered, looking directly at Rachel, who reached over and put her hand on Quinn's knee and gave it an affectionate squeeze.

"It's been great to see you all today, but I better get to Mom's," he stood. "When are you going back to New York?" He turned to Rachel.

"Tomorrow evening," she replied.

"Okay. Can I stop by in the morning to see you before I go?"

Santana picked up on the 'I go'.

"Where are you going tomorrow?" The Latina asked.

He raised his eyes, not quite wanting to break the news to them. "Back to Fort Bragg," he exhaled. "My unit leaves for Afghanistan at the end of the week."


	18. Chapter 18

A/N: Didn't want to keep people hanging on too long to find out what was going to happen. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee

Chapter 18

The three friends had been a little slack-jawed at the news and sadness crept over all of them as they realized what could happen to Finn in Afghanistan.

Rachel had actually cried openly about it, but he had to leave and spend time with his family so he left her sat in Santana's lap still weeping after a giant bear hug and a promise to be as careful as was humanly possible.

"Walk to the door with me Quinn?" Finn asked as he released Rachel's hand. "Sorry," he looked down as he realized what he had said. "I wasn't thinking."

She was long past getting upset at other people using that phrase; so much so, she often used it herself. "Hey it's fine. I say that all the time to people." She took his hand and let him pull her along the hallway to the door. As they stopped, he quickly crouched and pulled her closer, using his other hand on her knee to stop her rolling into his shins.

He opened the chest pocket of his uniform and pulled out a piece of paper. "My new number," he shrugged. "Give it to Rach if she wants it and anyone else. It would be good to get the odd message from home even if I can't reply to them."

Quinn took the paper. "Do you still have our numbers?"

He nodded. They're in my old phone. I'll transfer them over before I deploy."

"Why did you want to pull me aside?" she knew there was a reason he didn't want to speak in front of the other two.

He looked up at the ceiling not wanting to meet the steady gaze of hazel eyes. "I needed to know if she's been okay since, you know, we broke up."

Quinn thought about how to phrase her answer. The last thing she wanted was to upset him before he left.

"She still misses seeing you around, but I think she has accepted that marriage would have been a mistake for both of you. If it's any consolation, she hasn't been seeing anyone else as far as I know, and I think she would tell me if she was, you know she likes to share. I am not sure that she was heartbroken, we had a difficult few days after you left and then she sort of found other things to keep her occupied. I guess you were like a habit that she missed initially, but when she found other things to fill the gaps created by your absence, she seemed fine. Once we left Lima, she settled into a routine that included friends but interest in dating has been lacking. She's otherwise happy with her life in New York; she just belongs there, you know?"

"Good, I mean I'm glad she's happy. Can you tell her … I mean, I don't want her to wait, okay? Tell her to date people and enjoy herself. I wouldn't want to hold her back. She shouldn't live in the past." Finn looked at his first love and saw something in her face that he had never seen before as she looked over her shoulder to the room where Rachel was being consoled. There was a momentary flash of recognition in his brain as if something he had known all along but had never been able to see clearly, had just become evident. The proverbial fog cleared and the truth was revealed. "Does she feel the same about you as you do about her?"

"What?" Quinn suddenly flushed. Panic surged through her and she tried to avoid Finn's penetrating gaze.

"She spent all her time talking about you earlier." There was a wistful tone to his voice. He made eye contact with Quinn and he saw what he had seen the day he found out Puck was Beth's father; he found panic at his discovering the truth. "I asked her about New York and most of what she said had nothing to do with her or New York and mostly to do with you."

Quinn shook her head. "I don't know what you mean," the blonde protested but he wasn't really talking to her, he was talking more to himself than anything. The look in her eye had given her away again; he was right.

"It's true. And that's not like her at all. Rachel's favorite topic is usually herself, so why was she talking about you more? There's always been this thing with the two of you as if neither of you liked each other, but maybe that was just to get the other one's attention." Finn knew then what it was he needed to do. He stood and walked back towards the living room, pausing only to grab the back of Quinn's chair and spin her in front of him.

Quinn was both mad at him for pushing her without her consent and also in a state of panic, wondering what he was going to do. He was acting as though he was in charge of everything; a man on a mission. "Finn, stop and let go!" She didn't dare grab the wheels, it would probably have taken the skin off her hands; he was pushing so hard.

Rachel stood up when she heard Quinn yelling and looked at them strangely as Finn shoved the blonde girl until coming to an abrupt halt in front of her.

"Look, let me make this simple. I'm gone, okay. Tomorrow, I'll be leaving and I don't know what's going to happen, but I just realized something that I'm not sure you two even know about each other. I don't want to leave without making something right, just in case the unthinkable happens." He turned to Rachel. "I am so sorry that I proposed to you. It was stupid and foolish and selfish. Everything that Quinn said was true that time in the choir room. I was a child afraid of growing up and facing that we were all going to have to figure out what to do with our lives and be ready to move on. I panicked, trying to hold onto childhood and familiarity without realizing that I would just have been stifling the truth because convention is easier than the truth sometimes. You would have thought I might have realized that living in the same house as Kurt." He shook his head.

Santana had a strange expression on her face, half 'I told you so' and half 'what the fuck is he going to do?'

Quinn was embarrassed and desperate to prevent his doing something to spoil the order of things at present because she was pretty happy with the status quo. "Finn, please don't do what I think you're about to."

Rachel looked like she had already heard most of this before but his references were confusing and it was evident in her eyes.

"Quinn I know you are probably too considerate of Rachel's feelings to admit why you didn't really want us to marry and I am sure that Rachel is only just beginning to understand her own part in this, but if Rachel Berry spends all her time talking about someone other than herself, it's for one of two reasons; either that person has irritated her by trying to steal her spotlight or she is in love with them."

Santana's eyes widened. She would never have guessed that Finn would do this, but then again, he had outed her to the whole school, so maybe he did have more balls than she gave him credit for.

Quinn looked at her Latin friend. "Did you tell him?"

Santana looked horrified. "No, never I promised you I wouldn't say anything to anyone," she looked Quinn square in the eye. "I would never betray you." She reached over and grabbed Quinn's arm pleading with her eyes that she was being honest.

"She didn't say a word; she didn't have to," he gave her a gentle smile.

The blonde returned her eyes to the tall soldier. "How did you know then?"

"It just became obvious. All the little looks you gave her, the times you were mean, that was all a distraction for how you really felt. It was typical Quinn Fabray behavior and I didn't see it until a moment ago. You kept looking over here and I thought it was me at first that you were staring at, then I realized that as Rachel laughed, a big smile crept across your face and I saw it for what it was; you are in love with her."

"What are you all talking about?" Rachel was confused. "What do you know that you couldn't betray and why are you suggesting that Quinn loves me?" Rachel was already fairly hysterical beforehand at the news Finn was being posted to one of the most dangerous places on Earth, now this was completely confusing her.

"Quinn? What are they talking about? Why is Finn going on about you being mean to me as a distraction? I don't understand!"

Quinn's hands were shaking. She looked down at them. This wasn't how things were supposed to happen. Rachel wasn't supposed to find out and now it was all going to go to hell. Her perfectly, well_ almost_ perfectly disguised emotions for the petite starlet had been exposed and now Pandora's box was opened, it was going to be impossible to close it.

She sighed and put her head in her hands. "Finn, why did you have to say anything?"

"Because I don't think you would have and if anything happened to me, she would never know how you feel and then reciprocally, she would never have been able to see how she feels about you."

The three girls momentarily lost their train of thought at Finn's use of a word with so many syllables.

"You've known for a long time how you feel about Rachel, but I suspect she is only just beginning to realize how she feels about you. I don't know what to call this thing that you have, but it needed to be let out to breathe and live a little before you both suffocate." He looked tempted to say something else, but simply ran his hand through his short hair and placed his hat back on. "I gotta bounce. San, make them talk." And with that he took several loping strides to the door and it slammed behind him before any of the girls said another word.

"Oh my God!" Quinn's head was still in her hands and she couldn't look up to see the confusion and disappointment she suspected would be on Rachel's face. The blonde hair turned side to side as she shook her head in denial at what had just happened. "I can't believe he even guessed."

Santana reached over and stroked Quinn's hair to calm her down and for once, a hurting Quinn didn't flinch or squirm under the touch. No longer caring about their deal; she'd broken it twice already that afternoon anyway, Santana stood up and stretched her legs momentarily. She crouched in front of Quinn's knees and took hold of her friend's hands. "It's going to be okay, just talk to her about how you feel. The cat is out of the bag anyway now. Just be honest and be yourself."

Rachel was processing and remained open-mouthed and confused, working her way through all the words Finn had said. She definitely heard him say that Quinn had feelings for her and had for a long time, even back to when she bullied the shorter girl. He also said those feelings were reciprocated. Had she really only talked about Quinn in conversation with him. There was that thing she experienced back in New York just before they left for Lima.

Quinn couldn't speak, hell, she could hardly breathe. Her chest was heaving now as she let the flood gates open. It didn't happen so much now as it had in the past, but the tears wouldn't stop no matter how much she tried.

Santana wasn't watching Rachel, only Quinn and just didn't seem to be able to reach her. She didn't notice the little diva stand behind her and step alongside Quinn's chair.

Quinn felt a hand run across the center of her back and take hold of her in a comforting embrace.

"How long?"

Quinn still couldn't stop the tears but lifted her head and looked up at Santana, who just nodded towards their mutual best friend who was the one holding her.

"Quinn, how long?" Rachel repeated the question calmly and softly but with a sense of command.

"I don't even know," she pulled a hand from the Latin girl's and wiped across her face. "I'm sorry, I never wanted you to find out. I would never have done anything to make you feel uncomfortable. Why did he have to say anything?" Quinn felt the grip around her ribs tighten a little as the tears fell into her lap.

Santana looked around and went to get her a Kleenex.

"But you must remember when you first knew," Rachel was insistent. "Was it like Finn said? Was the bullying simply you trying to get my attention?"

Quinn tried to take a deep breath in but it was ragged. "Rachel. I have had feelings for you that I can't explain for a long time, pretty much as long as I have known you. I think maybe it was the first time I heard you sing." She took the tissue being stuffed in her hand by Santana. "Thanks," she mumbled to the taller of the two brunettes now gazing at her. "I don't know if all the unkind things I said were to get you to notice me, honestly I think I was just a nasty piece of work back then and capable of hurting pretty much anyone when I wanted my own way." Pushing her hands down on her knees, Quinn straightened herself, but found Rachel just moved with her, the shorter girl now kneeling beside her chair so that Quinn was looking down at her for a change. Rachel's big brown eyes were staring at her, seeking answers.

"I think it was that day at the lockers, do you remember, when Sue took away my Cheerio's uniform because I was pregnant. I asked why you were being so nice to me when I was such a bitch to you and …"

"I said that you finally understood what it was like to be me."

"I think that was when I started to realize how non-judgmental you were, and forgiving." Quinn smiled at her briefly, but the smile faded as she continued. "Then when you told Finn about Puck being Beth's father, you apologized and again made me aware of how honest you were compared to me. I told so many lies and hated myself for it. Each time you got stuck with bad news or something difficult, as annoying as you could be, you were just so determined and refused to give in that I couldn't help but admire you."

"But admiring someone and having feelings for them are completely different scenarios," Rachel commented the obvious.

"I know, it was when you saved me from grassing up Shelby that I realized what I was feeling. I finally understood why kept trying to ruin your relationship with Finn in Junior year and why I hadn't been supportive when you got engaged. I wasn't interested in him; I just didn't want him to have you. I can't apologize enough for that. When I finally realized, I stopped trying to break you up and for once thought about what you wanted and what would make you happy. Your happiness was more important to me than my own, that's why I finally agreed to go to the wedding."

"That's why you asked me in the corridor about the song at sectionals. You asked me if I was singing to Finn and only him."

Quinn nodded her head slowly. "I realized that I had been selfish and done that thing I always did before. I put what I wanted before what you wanted and it hit me like a flash that I hadn't really changed at all even though I had been nicer to everyone, that selfish streak had hit again. I just decided that even though I didn't want the two of you to get married, I needed to be there to make you happy."

"So you agreed to be my bridesmaid even though you were what, in love with me?"

"I don't even know what to call my feelings for you, but I just so desperately wanted you to be happy that I would have done anything that day for you and then I ruined it all."

"No you didn't. Help me, San. Convince her that she didn't ruin anything."

"Hey I tried a bunch of times to tell her that already, but she's too thick-headed to listen."

"I did. I ruined your dream of getting married and then everything went to hell with you and Finn, which I felt responsible for and I got stuck in the chair so that was the end of any hopes I had about ever being worthy enough for you." Quinn shrugged the tears had finally stopped somewhere in the middle of what she had said. She was emotionally spent. "God knows how, but Santana guessed when I was first told about my legs; she just knew that I had feelings for you but I swore her to secrecy."

"I understand why, at the time I mean. But why didn't you say anything after Finn and I split up? Because I have to tell you that those feelings aren't one-sided, Quinn. I don't mean that I thought about you the same way, but you must know that I have been fairly obsessed with your happiness of late and Finn had every reason to be jealous of all the time I spent with you after the accident. He knew I think, that your well-being was more important to me than his. I just don't understand why I didn't recognize this about myself earlier." Rachel went inside her own head for a moment and was lost in thought.

Quinn chuckled. "It took me a long time too. I still don't know what this is between us, I know that you're straight and I don't even know if I am gay or if it's just you that makes me feel like this. All I know is that I can take disappointment and being alone, but I never want to be without you as a friend."

"You didn't really listen to me when I said you weren't alone in those feelings. Why wouldn't we still be friends?"

"I just never really feel like I am good enough for you."

"Quinn, why?"

"Because like it or not, even if we were capable of loving each other, I am still just half a person now. Look at me, Rach. You're going to be a big star and you wouldn't want to be seen with me when you walk down the red carpet at some awards ceremony."

"You're so wrong. In fact you couldn't be more wrong if you tried. Quinn you are amazing. I don't know anyone who's met you that doesn't think you are the most beautiful creature alive…"

"Told you!" Santana interrupted, to which Quinn blushed slightly. "We've already had this out." Santana pointed backwards and forwards between herself and the blonde, whilst looking at Rachel.

"Exactly. I would be proud to be seen anywhere with you and I couldn't care less that you are in a wheelchair. I would never be embarrassed by your disability and you shouldn't be either. You should feel the same about yourself as we feel about you."

"But you are also forgetting that you are straight, Rach. All you talk about are the cute boys on my course and in the swim team!"

"You mean the one's I have turned down when they asked me out? Plus the other's at NYADA, well the straight ones anyway, that I also turned down?"

"What are you saying?"

"I have always believed, in fact we have had this conversation before, that sexuality isn't about being gay or straight but it's a fluid situation and we can fall in love with someone regardless of their gender if they are the right person for you. If I was a guy, would you have flirted with me before now? Because if you were a guy, I probably would have been all over you, that's if I'd known you were interested. Why should it matter that we are the same sex if we are both attracted to each other?"

Quinn shook her head. "Are you saying that…"

"I'm saying that when we get back to New York, we will go on a date and see if we feel the same about each other by being open and honest and true to ourselves. We can take the rest as it comes."

"Oh, okay then." Quinn's nod indicated her agreement. Rachel had caught her off guard, by just being so direct, but then wasn't that part of why she loved her?

"Thank God for that!" Santana sighed with relief that finally the pair of them had realized and acknowledged their mutual attraction for one another.


	19. Chapter 19

A/N: Thanks again for the feedback. Hope you all keep enjoying it. Let me know what you think of the latest instalment. This one has a little surprise in it.

Disclaimer: Glee does not belong to me.

Chapter 19

Three months later

Rachel and Quinn had a quiet night planned. Santana was working and Blaine had arrived the evening before to keep Kurt occupied; they had gone out to dinner and on to a club afterwards. It was quietly orchestrated at Rachel's request.

This weekend was the anniversary of the accident.

Quinn had pretended all week that it didn't bother her. She had spent some time at her dorm, but Rachel had insisted they keep busy in the evenings just to stop either of them dwelling on it too much. Apart from the Wednesday evening where she had a swim meet, Quinn had gone over to the apartment to spend the night in Rachel's arms. Sometimes they made love, but sometimes they just held each other and remembered what happened to let the emotion go.

Rachel knew that tomorrow would be a difficult day for the both of them. A year ago tomorrow, they won regionals. A year ago tomorrow Rachel should have gotten married. A year ago tomorrow was the last time Quinn had stood, walked and danced on her own two feet.

Rachel had just cleared away their books from the coffee table. Both had mid-terms the following week and had studied a little, but their hearts weren't in it. Quinn was in the bathroom, as she always said, 'taking care of the plumbing.' Rachel smiled at the thought, not of what her girlfriend was doing but that she could say those words without a hint of sadness or regret. The smile was one of pride in the former cheerleader. There was a drawer in the bathroom cabinet that none of them ever went in except Quinn. They all knew what was in it, but they never peeked. The respect for her privacy and dignity was absolute and all of them would do whatever it took to ensure it was preserved.

Rachel could hear Quinn singing. She had been practicing all week for a performance her theatre group had planned. The warmth of Quinn's voice had grown lately, or maybe she was biased, whatever; she just loved listening to it. It wasn't classically trained like hers, but it was so natural and easy to listen to.

The buzzer at the door rang to wake Rachel from her musing. They weren't expecting anyone back so soon. Rachel went to the door and opened it. She stood momentarily stunned, forgetting her manners.

"Shelby," Rachel couldn't really say much else. It was the last person she had expected to find at her door.

"Hi, Rachel. I hope I'm not intruding, but I bumped into your friend Santana in Central Park earlier. She gave me your new address and told me I would be welcome to come and see you. She said a lot had happened in your life and I was feeling guilty that we haven't had a chance to catch up. It's been so long I didn't want to leave it until another day."

"Of course," Rachel recovered. "Please come in. It's lovely to see you and Beth of course." She opened the door for them to come in.

The toddler was in a stroller and looking remarkably like Quinn. A brief moment of panic ran through Rachel; Quinn was here.

"I didn't know you were in New York," Rachel said. "The last email I got from you was over a year ago and you didn't mention moving here." She leaned forward to say hi to Beth; the little girl was cute as anything, with curly dark blonde hair and a very familiar pair of hazel eyes and dark pink lips.

"I didn't know I was going to until I actually went and did it. I started a pre-school on the Upper East Side. I was going to let you know, but it's been a lot of work and I haven't had a lot of down time. Besides, I wanted to let you have some space after the business with your friends last year."

Rachel was going to say something, but heard the familiar squeak of rubber wheels turning on the wooden floor. She closed her eyes briefly. This could go terribly wrong.

"Who was at the …" Quinn's gaze went first to Shelby then immediately to her daughter sat in the stroller. Her mouth fell open and a look of pain crossed her face.

"Quinn, Santana bumped into Shelby today and told her to stop by for a visit, so she came straight over…." Rachel's voice died in her throat when she saw the flash of pain across her lover's face.

Quinn shook her head but didn't say anything at first. She looked down for a moment, not knowing what to do; she didn't feel like she had a choice. Rachel didn't get to see her mother very often. "I'll just go get my coat and go back to my dorm." She spun around in a three-sixty and headed towards Rachel's bedroom.

"Quinn, wait." Rachel went to go after her, but felt an arm pull her back.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know Quinn was here otherwise I wouldn't have come. Rachel, I'll go and come back another time when it's more convenient, especially under the circumstances." Shelby nodded at the girl rapidly disappearing from the scene.

Rachel sighed. She didn't just want to break it to Shelby that she and Quinn were rarely apart these days. She had to do something to bring some sort of appeasement between her mother and her lover. "Shelby, please don't go. I haven't seen you in over a year and as you can see," she nodded towards where Quinn was probably layering up, "there's a lot to tell you about. Quinn's changed a lot, and all for the better I promise. Just let me talk to her and we can have some tea together."

Shelby was uncertain about spending time with the mother of her adoptive daughter, but she had just seen the girl come into the room in a wheelchair so something had happened since the last time they had spoken. She didn't trust Quinn even a little after the set-up last year, but she did know that Rachel found it virtually impossible to lie and if her daughter said Quinn had changed for the better, she could believe that was the truth.

Rachel literally ran to her room.

"Quinn, stop. Please."

Quinn had her coat on and was wrapping a scarf around her neck. Her back was turned and she didn't reply.

"Quinn? Turn around please and talk to me."

"What is there to talk about?" The blonde reached for a beanie that was perched on the end of the bed, but she didn't turn around.

"Just come and talk to her."

"She doesn't want to talk to me. She came to see you and I'm not allowed to spend time with Beth. I couldn't bear to sit in here knowing she's in the other room, so I'm going to go."

Rachel hadn't heard the hard edge to Quinn's voice in a long, long time. It was scary Quinn in front of her right now. The scary bit was not knowing what she was thinking or what she was going to do next.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know she was going to just drop in unannounced. I haven't heard from her since before the accident. Please don't go. We planned this evening and I still want us to spend it together, so just come out and talk. I'll be there as well. She needs to know you've changed and then maybe she'll let you, us even, be a part of Beth's life again."

Quinn stayed quiet for a moment.

"Please will you stay, for me?"

She saw the blonde's shoulders drop in resignation. "Just give me a couple of minutes will you? I need to get undressed again." The beanie was dropped back where it had been on the bed, but still Quinn didn't turn around.

Rachel nodded. "Okay, sure. I'll go make some tea for us."

"Raspberry?" Quinn looked over her shoulder at Rachel and gave her a weak smile.

"Yeah." Rachel turned and left Quinn to sort herself out and calm down.

She walked back to where Shelby was still stood. "Please, take off your coat and have a seat. I'm just going to make some tea, would you like some? Quinn will join us in a minute."

Shelby looked confused at what was going on, having heard the conversation between the students. "That sounds nice." She bent to unfasten the seatbelt keeping Beth in the stroller. "You don't mind if I let Beth out?"

"Of course not, but we aren't used to toddlers here so you should probably keep a close eye on her. We don't have those things in the sockets to stop them sticking fingers in." Rachel, ever thoughtful.

"It's fine, she has her favorite book to keep her occupied." Shelby lifted the toddler up and sure enough the little girl was hanging onto a book.

"She's got big," Rachel noted.

"Growing up fast," Shelby nodded. She looked at her daughter and smiled, but the smile faded. "Quinn, is she alright?"

"I don't know, she was shocked to see you and you know how she feels about Beth."

"I didn't mean that, I meant the er …"

"The wheelchair?"

Shelby nodded.

Rachel sighed. "I'll let her tell you what happened, but I warn you, it's going to get pretty emotional."

Quinn's wheels squeaked as she turned through the bedroom door and switched off the light, alerting the two women that she was on her way into the room. There was a gently rumble as the wheels rolled across the floor, getting nearer.

She had taken a deep breath and was going to try to be brave and not cry in front of her daughter. The blonde curls got her straight away though and her face almost cracked as she saw the little girl wave the book at Shelby. Quinn looked away for a moment and then plastered a smile on her face, even if it wasn't a very convincing one.

Rachel took a tray for the mugs of tea and pointed them towards the coffee table in front of the shabby sofa and mismatched armchair. "Let's sit," she said taking the chair for herself. Shelby sat on the sofa at one end and dropped Beth beside her in the middle. Quinn stayed in her chair and remained quiet, simply watching the little girl chatting to no one in particular. Her words were still childlike, but understandable.

She had her book open and Quinn didn't recognize it at first, but then Beth closed it with a bit of a dramatic flourish and she gasped. "Goldilocks."

"It's still her favorite," Shelby gave the blonde teenager a gentle smile.

"She still has it. I remember going to buy it with Puck."

Beth looked up at Quinn and the identical pairs of eyes locked onto each other for a moment. "Troller!" Beth exclaimed and pointed at Quinn.

Quinn's eyebrows quirked.

"Ssh, Beth. I'm sorry Quinn. She's saying stroller, 's' just escapes her sometimes. Beth, baby. It's not a stroller."

Completely catching out the other two women, Quinn just laughed. "She kind of has a point though." Shaking her head, the blonde looked over at Shelby. "You didn't know did you?" She pointed down at her chair.

The older woman shook her head and smiled sadly.

She looked up at Rachel for a moment. "I didn't realize you hadn't told Shelby what happened." Quinn took a deep breath. "I guess I should just start from the last time we spoke."

Rachel watched the blonde girl shift a little in the chair, as was her habit when nervous. She adjusted her legs unconsciously, a clear sign she was more nervous than usual. She knew Quinn wasn't overly worried about describing her accident anymore; she had done it plenty of times that semester every time she met someone new. It was the fact that it was someone from her past, someone who knew her when she was still able-bodied, the fact that it was someone she had hurt.

Quinn just started talking without looking at anyone, she was leaning her elbows on her knees, looking down on them rather than meeting the gaze of the other three people in the room. "I should start by apologizing for what I did to you; I don't know that I ever really did that properly. I said it when we last spoke, but it would have come from a selfish perspective because I didn't want you to take Beth away, rather than because I actually was sorry for what I did to you." She breathed in deeply and held it, trying not to get too upset straight away. Shaking her head she added, "I still can't believe what a selfish person I was. I was so spoiled and ridiculously immature. If I could go back and undo it, I would. Rachel made me understand why I was wrong." She finally looked up and smiled at her girlfriend. "She always was my moral compass."

Rachel grinned back at her.

"What you and Puck were up to was wrong, but I started that whole sequence of events in motion in the first place. You were right when you said I was a wreck." Quinn shook her head and ran her hands through her hair sweeping it back fro her face. "I don't know if I ever had a proper understanding of the difference between right and wrong until Rachel explained how horrible it felt to do the wrong thing and I suddenly realized that I had rarely experienced what it was like to do the right thing. At the time I couldn't see how destructive I had become, but my friends from Glee Club helped a lot. I finally got myself together, applied to some good schools and accepted a place at Yale, with a scholarship no less." She smiled a little sadly remembering how happy she had been when the letter came and how she had shown Rachel first, trying to get her to understand that they would all be moving on and that marrying Finn was a mistake.

As she recounted this to Shelby, she saw the older woman begin to understand the change she had gone through.

"I wanted to get into Yale because I needed to prove to Beth, when she was older, that I had made something of myself and giving her up was the right thing for both of us. I wanted her to be proud of me and I figured getting in there was a good way to start." She bit her lip. "I tried to get Rach to see that we were destined for better things than Lima, Ohio, but she was determined to marry Finn before leaving. I should have been supportive, but I was being selfish again. Anyway, then we got distracted because a student who used to go to our school tried to commit suicide and it freaked everyone a little. Rach and Finn moved their wedding up to the day of Regionals as a result. Afterwards we headed back to school and Coach Sylvester gave me back my Cheerleading uniform because she said I had changed for the better and deserved another shot at a last national championship. I put the uniform on and it made me feel different somehow, like I had a chance to make up for misusing the power it brought last time and doing something good the second time around. I saw Rach in the corridor and she was happy for me but disappointed that I wouldn't go to the wedding to make her happy. I told her I wanted to go for her. The first time in my life I think I ever put someone else's happiness above my own." Quinn shook her head.

Shelby met her gaze with a pained look, sensing that the story was coming to the point where the wheelchair would be explained. She had seen the way Quinn had moved her legs with her hands and suspected that it was going to be bad news she heard.

The dryness in her throat forced Quinn to take a drink of her tea before she carried on. Beth was looking at her book mostly, but she wasn't saying much, almost as if she knew that the voice speaking just needed to be heard without interruption.

"I still am mad at myself for not supporting Rach earlier because if I had, we wouldn't have needed to rush back to my house and get my dress; I would have had it with me already like the others. The two of us got in my car and headed out to get it and then hurried to the courthouse. Finn kept texting Rach to hurry up and it was distracting. We got to an intersection and just never even saw it coming." Finally Quinn's voice cracked and she shed a tear. "You tell her what happened next, Rach." Quinn felt bad that she had put it on Rachel but she didn't even remember most of it anyway.

Shelby was looking at her daughter now with shock. "You were in an accident?"

Rachel nodded. "A truck went through a stop sign and hit the car; the brakes failed and it couldn't avoid us. It hit Quinn's side, which is why she got hurt so much worse than I did."

"Why didn't you let me know?"

Rachel looked at the older woman. "Honestly, it wasn't deliberate. You just weren't around at the time and it took a while for everything to sink in. It was such a shock to go from one extreme emotion to the other and everyone was focused on helping the both of us, but especially Quinn. Both of us were unconscious and suffering from multiple injuries, but I lucked out. I had a broken leg and was a bit cut up in parts. I had a compression injury to my spine but within a few days the feeling and movement started to return and after about six weeks of physical therapy I was fine. Just had a little limp for a couple of months but even that went once I went back to ballet classes. Quinn didn't have the good fortune that I did though."

"I did Rach." Quinn didn't want to argue but had to disagree. "The truth is that we could both be dead. I didn't wake up for a week, they had me so doped up on meds. When I did finally manage to see through the fog of the drugs they told me what had happened. It turned out that I had a head injury but the swelling went down so I was going to be okay eventually. Then they told me that I had a spinal cord injury and that it was pretty bad. They gave me less than five per cent chance of walking again and it turns out they were right. The injury left me a paraplegic, paralyzed from my hips down." She looked down at her legs for a moment.

"Quinn, I'm so sorry," Shelby was crying, which was a first. It was just a few tears, but the first bit of compassion Quinn had ever seen the woman show towards her.

"It's okay. I mean, I wasn't okay with it at first, but I guess no one would be. Eventually though, I found out that there is more to me than just a pretty face. I worked hard and got my life back together with _a lot _of help," the blonde emphasized.

"She was amazing," Rachel interrupted. "Kept her grades up in school, came back to Glee club, performed at Nationals and graduated top of the class."

"Good for you. I'm sorry I missed it."

"You wouldn't say that if you saw my dancing," Quinn laughed. "I was scared stupid, I could barely manage the chair on a day to day basis let alone dance in it!"

"She's being modest and if I may say so, our duet was what won us the title at Nationals so no running yourself down."

"It could have been a sympathy vote you know," Quinn's eyes crinkled as she grinned at her girlfriend.

"I choose to believe we just moved the judges with the emotion of the song and our delicious voices." Quinn loved Rachel's eternal optimism. "Would you like to see it, I have a recording on my laptop?" Rachel asked Shelby.

"I would actually, but maybe later." She sensed Quinn wasn't quite finished. "What happened after you finished school?"

"Not a lot, I decided Yale just didn't suit me anymore. The campus is old and although it was accessible, it was hard work for someone who had only been injured a few months. I chose Columbia instead, partly because it was more accessible, but also because New York suited me better. I felt more at home here. Plus, I knew I had friends coming here who understood me and could help out if I was struggling."

"That's right. Kurt is responsible for changing light bulbs, Santana runs interference and I am …"

"Too short for either of those," Quinn laughed at her.

"That is correct." Rachel agreed with a smile. "But everyone is very proud of you for the way you have coped and adjusted."

"I know," Quinn was a little embarrassed as always at the compliment. "You keep reminding me like five times a day!"

"So if it happened on the day of Regionals, it happened about a year ago?" Shelby asked.

"A year ago tomorrow," Quinn's face fell as she remembered it was the anniversary.

"And I burst in the evening before. I am really sorry I didn't call first to check it was convenient."

"Don't apologize. I got to see Beth," the blonde brightened instantly. "And I meant what I said earlier about making something of myself. If at some point in the future, when you decide I am worthy of being involved, or even if she just decides to get in touch when she is older, I will be able to prove it, not just say it. I know you still don't really have reason to believe what I say."

Shelby nodded but didn't comment.

Rachel wanted to talk to Shelby alone briefly. "Can I talk to you a moment, you know just the two of us?" she asked her mother.

Shelby looked a little awkwardly at Beth who was still sat beside her on the sofa and then at Quinn. "Do you mind sitting with her…" The brunette suddenly thought about her words and wondered if she had put her foot in her mouth by using that expression.

"I'm good at sitting," Quinn smiled. "Not like I can run off with her is it?"

Rachel laughed at her. "Stop it, you know it makes people squirm when they aren't used to your self-deprecating humor. Ignore her, Shelby. She does it deliberately to throw people off their guard."

"I don't want to freak Beth out with the chair. Is it okay if I sit on the sofa with her?" Quinn asked, serious for a moment.

"Of course," Shelby looked at the girl. "Do you need help?"

"No," Quinn shook her head. "It won't be pretty, but it's not difficult." She pulled up to the opposite end of the sofa from Shelby and lifted her legs from the chair so her feet were on the floor, then with a quick pivot of her hips she plopped down on the sofa. It took a bit of adjustment to get her backside into the corner and then she pulled her chair back down the side out of the way.

"Hey, Beth. I guess you don't remember me, but I remember you." Quinn's voice was soft and warm as she spoke to her daughter. "Can I read with you?"

Quinn wasn't sure if the little girl was just happy to share her book with anyone or if maybe somehow the nine months she was inside of her, her voice was something familiar, but the little blonde head bobbed up and down and the book was put in Quinn's lap.

"Go talk," Quinn waved at the other two women. "We'll be fine. I promise to shout if she does a runner on me or gets upset." Turning back to the book, Quinn looked at the front cover and asked Beth who it was.

"Goldilock," the toddler replied.

"And who's this?" Quinn pointed out another picture.

"Baby bear," a big smile spread over the little girl's face.

Quinn opened the book and so she could see the pictures, Beth scooted around so she was leaning forwards on Quinn's right leg with her elbows. Quinn kept the book open with her left hand and put her right arm around the toddler's back, desperate to make some sort of connection with her daughter.

Shelby stood and followed Rachel to the kitchen.

"What did you want to talk about?" The taller woman asked.

"I just wanted to know how you are and have a chance to find out what's been going on in your life. You said you had been really busy." Rachel was stalling actually, trying to work out a way of telling her mother about her relationship with Quinn.

"The pre-school is going really well, but between that and Beth, I don't get a lot of free time. It's harder than I thought it would be to bring up a child alone. I get to meet lots of other parents in the same position though so that's nice. I get the feeling that isn't what you pulled me away to talk about though."

"I always was a terrible liar," Rachel admitted. "Not that I'm faking genuine interest in your life though. I really do want to know what's been happening and it's nice to hear about something normal rather than the drama surrounding us over the last year."

"The whole thing seems terribly cruel, but I am relieved you are alright. You weren't lying about that were you?"

"No, I am completely fine. Like I said earlier, I was very fortunate. Even the little scars from the glass have faded, look." Rachel held out her left arm and turned it so that her mother could see the few tiny marks on the back that were virtually invisible unless they were pointed out. "I just wish Quinn hadn't suffered so badly." Rachel looked towards the room where the blonde head of her girlfriend moved as she read to her daughter.

"I didn't think the two of you were close. I got the impression that you were more rivals than friends."

"We were for a long time, but after the incident with you, we became good friends. She said that I was the one person she could always trust to be impartial and not be intimidated into agreeing with her and for me she became the same, straight and direct, always being honest with me when I needed advice. Only Quinn and Kurt dared to speak up about how wrong Finn and I were to even think about getting married at our age. And then after the accident, we became pretty much inseparable. I guess we had just been through something so terrible together, that we were the only ones who understood. When I said she had changed, really she has. I wasn't making that up. She's actually much happier now than she ever was at school. This week is difficult because it's the anniversary, but otherwise, she really is the person I always thought she was deep down."

"Who is that exactly?"

"She's funny. Her sense of humor is very dry and witty. She makes people happy now, which is quite a turn around. It was hard for her to come here so soon after the accident. I guess it's easy to understand why. Quinn was always worried about what other people think about her; her parents were very judgmental and that always seemed to boil down to appearances. She was worried about making new friends because of the chair, but she is open about what happened and everyone sort of forgets about it, well not forgets, but it just disappears into the background after a while. She treats people differently too. It's not about appearances or her own gain anymore. She feels better about life when she makes someone smile or laugh. It's pretty awesome to be around."

"I didn't think I would ever hear anyone say that about Quinn Fabray."

Rachel blushed now. "I have to tell you something else about her, well about both of us really," she paused aware that Shelby might be offended and think neither of them should be around her daughter afterwards, but Rachel could never hide the truth. "We are sort of involved now."

"Involved?"

"With each other. I mean we're in a relationship with each other."

Shelby was stunned for the second time that evening. "Oh!"

"I know it's probably a bit of a shock bearing in mind how much we hurt each other in the past, but I couldn't let you go any longer without knowing."

"Thanks for telling me, Rachel. How long have you been an item?"

"Since Thanksgiving. We were sort of confronted by Finn who had seen us sort of dancing around each other, but afraid to admit how we felt. Once it was out of the bag, we just sort of tried it out to see if it was real and it turned out that it was."

"I'm happy for you, so long as you are both happy with each other," Shelby smiled. She was surprised, but only because both girls had always purported to be heterosexual in the past. Shelby had been around show business long enough to be comfortable around gay people. "Can I ask you about Quinn's injury though?"

"What about it?"

"There's nothing that can be done for her?"

Rachel shook her head but not in a sad way. "No, she's had lots of therapy but her injury is pretty much complete. She doesn't really have any chance of recovering more movement and sensation as things are at the moment. Maybe in the future something will come up, but she doesn't live expecting it. Actually she's going to do some amazing things. She sort of avoided identifying herself as disabled to begin with but now she says that if no one will give her a job as an actress, she'll become a director or producer so she can cast herself or someone else with a disability to change people's attitudes. It's quite a turnaround from the selfish person she used to be. I suppose that's the difference that loving parents make. Her father was a bully and her mother was an alcoholic; both obsessed with being judged purely on the success of raising a perfect child. What chance do you stand of being normal when you are born into that?"

"And what about you? You're not worried about being in a relationship with someone who is disabled?"

"Not at all. I find her inspiring to be around. She won't admit it, but she is so full of courage now that she doesn't care about her image anymore. And like I said, after a while the chair just fades into the background. It's always there, but I don't feel sad about it anymore and I don't pity Quinn. I wish she hadn't had to go through so much pain and suffering but she makes me very happy and nothing means more to me than her happiness. Like right now, she's getting to spend time with Beth and whatever pain she feels tomorrow about the accident will be mitigated by the fact that she saw Beth today." Rachel looked her own birth mother in the eye, because their stories were so similar. "We don't talk about her much because I know it hurts Quinn to think about being separated from Beth, but when we do, I know that it's the only regret she carries with her. Everything else in the past she has forgiven herself for, but not Beth. I don't think she will be able to do that until Beth is old enough to know and understand what happened and can forgive her for letting her go."

Shelby remained quiet for a few moments. "I understand that if nothing else."

Rachel smiled at the taller woman. "I know you do."

"Do you forgive me?"

"Of course I do. I missed not having a Mom when I was little, but I wouldn't change any of my childhood now that I know what you did and I completely understand why. I'm glad we met though and I even understand myself a bit better because of that. I just hope that Beth gets that chance too. She will have questions about Quinn when she gets older and there will be things about herself that she doesn't understand because they don't come from you. If you let Quinn be a part of Beth's life when both of you are ready of course, I know it will help with that."

Shelby nodded. She looked at her watch. It was getting late and already past Beth's bedtime. "We should go."

"Of course," Rachel let Shelby go ahead of her.

Quinn had the little girl on her lap now and was stroking the curls at the back of her neck. Rachel thought they looked so cute together. She approached the pair and told Quinn that Shelby was now aware of their relationship. The blonde girl's eyes immediately went to Shelby but they were met with a smile rather than the disapproval she feared.

"I don't know when I'll get to see her again, so I just wanted to thank you for staying a while," Quinn's eyes glassed over and a fragile looking smile spread across her face. "This has made my day. Actually make that my year."

"She still loves to hear your voice," Shelby replied. "She doesn't always sit well with strangers, so I think that's what it must be; she recognizes your voice from when you carried her. She probably finds it soothing."

Quinn smiled. She had no right to ask Shelby to bring her again another time. She would have to wait until Shelby could forgive her before she could ask. "Thanks for bringing her and listening to me. I really do want to prove myself to you and to her and I swear I will never betray your trust again or try to take her from you. I can't believe you trusted me enough to leave us alone for a little while."

"Quinn, stop. Don't keep punishing yourself for what you did. We're all capable of juvenile behavior at times, especially when we aren't thinking rationally." Rachel didn't like to hear her berate herself.

"Don't defend me over this Rach, you didn't hear the things I said to Shelby."

"Rachel's right, Quinn. You said some pretty horrible things to her in the past and she obviously forgave you, so how about I do the same and we can start again. You're right in that so far you haven't given me reason to trust that you changed, but Rachel is pathologically unable to lie, so I believe you have changed because she says so. I never wanted to exclude you from Beth's life but you were pretty toxic so I couldn't have you around her then. Things have obviously changed and so I'm prepared to let you back into her life, both of you actually. It would be good for Beth to have a big sister to look up to." Shelby paused because she didn't want to be mean when Quinn's generosity had given her a daughter, but she wanted to make it clear where she stood. "I have some conditions though."

"Anything, Shelby. I will literally do anything you ask."

"Everyone deserves a second chance. So you get yours, but mess this up and you won't see her again until she chooses to find you."

"I understand," Quinn agreed readily. She wouldn't mess this up again.

"Second, you leave it to me to decide when it's the right time to tell her who you really are."

"Is that it, only two?"

"I do have one more but I don't want this to sound like I don't trust you to look after Beth. It's just that she won't understand about your ... " Shelby searched for the right word, "injury. I don't think it would be a good idea to have her on your own, without someone else around until she's a little older just in case she runs off. She has a habit of doing that. I would just like to play it by ear until I know she's old enough to understand and behave appropriately."

Quinn looked down at the little girl and knew she wouldn't want anything bad to happen to her. She knew that Shelby was probably right. Quinn could easily get stranded, especially when she wasn't in her chair. She might not be able to chase the girl down if she slipped away when her back was turned. "I agree, the last thing I would want is for her to get hurt. The fact you would even consider letting me be alone with her at some time in the future is the best news I have had in a long time. I can't believe how generous you are being about this."

Rachel was a little heartbroken. It had never occurred to her that Quinn wouldn't be able to look after a child on her own. It was the recognition of this in turn which made her realize she had subconsciously been planning for their future together.

Quinn kissed the top of Beth's head. "Time to go Baby Bear. Thank you for letting me read your book."

The youngster turned and climbed around to face the blonde teenager. "Kiss, Kin," she stood up on Quinn's thighs and reached around the teenager's neck, unable to say Quinn's name properly, but presenting herself for a kiss.

Shelby looked pained at seeing Beth standing on Quinn's legs, wondering if that was good for someone whose legs were paralyzed, but registered that Quinn showed no sign of discomfort. "Is it okay for Beth to be putting weight on Quinn's thighs like that?" She whispered to Rachel.

Rachel put a hand on her mother's arm to reassure her. "It's fine, she's not fragile and she can't feel there anyway."

"You're so ... matter of fact about it." Shelby was still a little awkward when talking about Quinn's disability, which was to be expected; most people were to begin with.

"Might I suggest you come for lunch one Sunday with Santana and Kurt as well. We have a little pact to share a meal once a month while ever we're in New York. It might be easier to relax more with the others around and I know Santana is very fond of you; she would love to spend some time catching up." Rachel knew that seeing Quinn and San's constant teasing of each other would also loosen Shelby up; it had that effect on everyone.

Shelby liked that idea, much better than the more concentrated experience of her intense daughter and the mother of her adoptive child. "Do you have a date?"

"I believe the next one is two weekends from this coming Sunday." Rachel was thrilled that Shelby was willing to be part of their lives again.


	20. Chapter 20

Disclaimer: Glee still belongs to Fox, not me

Chapter 20

Rachel was busy cooking all the vegetables and nut roast for herself while Kurt basted the turkey. Quinn could cook but their kitchen was virtually impossible for her if there was more than one other person, so she sorted out a selection of music instead and Santana set the table.

The buzzer rang and Quinn looked around expecting one of the others to get it, they usually beat her to the punch, but they were all occupied and avoiding eye contact. She smiled nervously, understanding exactly what was going on. "I guess I'll go then," she mumbled. Quinn had made an effort to look smart, not that she normally looked anything approaching scruffy, but she had been dressing more casual since her accident and other than in the warmest weather, her legs didn't get much of an outing in public. Kurt had helped her out with something nice. She wore charcoal leggings under a pale grey knitted dress that had a dark band around the waist to emphasize her narrow waist (according to Kurt this was good) and a pair of grey Ugg boots. They looked better with a dress than the DMs (according to Kurt) she had been devoted to all winter and she had to admit, they were much easier to get on her uncooperative feet, but she also thought they made her legs look skinnier than usual as well. Her hair was lifted back from her face by a baby blue headband and she had a string of pearls around her neck. Kurt had actually used the term 'delicious' when she rolled out of Rachel's room earlier, causing her to blush.

She reached up for the catch and opened the door. Shelby stood behind the stroller bearing her daughter.

"Hey Baby Bear, high five." Quinn held out her hand and felt the small chubby fingers meet her own.

"Kin!" The now familiar pronunciation greeted her and she was rewarded with a big smile.

"Hi," she smiled nervously at the tall brunette. "Come on in."

"Thanks. Something smells good and you look stunning," she commented on Quinn's appearance. "That dress looks amazing on you."

"Thanks." She blushed a little at the genuine praise and was even more surprised when Shelby leaned in to give her a gentle hug. "Kurt helped pick it out. He's our fashionista," she paused to turn her chair. "Guys, they're here. Come say hello." Quinn shouted the roommates.

Santana bounced over. "Ms C!" The brunettes shared a hug. "Good to see you again."

"You're not my student anymore, Santana. Call me Shelby please? And you look great too."

"Can I get your coats?" Quinn asked while waiting for the chefs to make their way in.

Santana huffed. "Let me, you can't even reach the coat hooks anyway, shorty."

"I was going to put them on the bed, actually!" Quinn returned.

"I see some things don't change," Shelby commented with a raised eyebrow.

"Hey Squirt," Santana waved at Beth.

"Don't call her Squirt," Quinn rolled her eyes.

"Why not, she likes it; look." Proven right, Beth gave the Latina a toothy grin.

"Tana!"

"She remembered from two weeks ago! Awesome! Don't fret about the sparring, Shelby. We love each other really." San pushed Quinn's shoulder playfully. "Oh and she made us swear on the Holy Bible and the Tora that we wouldn't let on about Q's status, so all is good."

Shelby smiled realizing that the friends weren't really fighting.

"Can I get Beth out of her stroller?" Quinn looked at Shelby for permission. "I promise I won't drop her."

"She's been watching YouTube clips on how to do it all week." Santana gave the game away.

"Aargh! The pierce of Lopez's blade stuck firmly between my shoulders blades," Quinn acted as though she really had been stabbed in the back momentarily.

"Funny, Fabray. You know you should really think about acting as a career."

"Really? You think?" Santana earned herself the fearsome raised eyebrow.

She retaliated by grabbing Quinn and tickling her ribs.

"Okay, mercy. Please stop!" Quinn giggled much to Beth's delight.

"Go ahead, Quinn." Shelby nodded.

They were interrupted by the arrival of Kurt and Rachel. The former air kissed Shelby on both cheeks as was his style and Rachel settled for a big hug.

"Just ignore the juveniles, Ms Corcoran. The adults are here now!" Kurt pushed his hair back into place even though it had barely moved.

"It's Shelby, please. Thank you for inviting us."

As the greetings were made, Quinn reached forward and opened the buckle on Beth's seatbelt. "Okay, Baby Bear. How would you like to come for a ride on a choo choo train?"

Beth reached her arms out to be picked up, but Quinn knew she wouldn't be able to lift the toddler in the conventional way. Santana had been right about her research. There were lots of paraplegic mothers who had posted clips online to learn from and she had practiced with one of Rachel's Teddy bears.

Quinn set her brakes so she wouldn't roll backwards and grabbed the frame of her chair at the front to brace herself with her left arm and then pulled Beth over into her lap with the right hooked around the little girl's ribs, turning her around as she moved so that Beth was facing everyone else.

Everyone else just watched on with admiration at the seamless move.

"Impressive," Shelby gave her a smile.

"Thanks. I practiced with Rachel's biggest Teddy. Oh and we got a bunch of those socket protector things so Beth can't get an electric shock if she touches them."

"That's really thoughtful."

"It was Rachel's idea. We just did the low ones where she can reach."

Santana took Shelby's coat from her and Beth's from Quinn who had removed it so they could be hung up.

"Let's have a drink while the turkey finishes cooking, it's a few minutes behind." Rachel was the supreme hostess. "We have white wine, beer, soda or fruit juice."

"I'm not driving so I'll have a glass of wine."

"Me either, I'll have wine too," Quinn replied to her girlfriend.

"You're always driving!" Santana snorted at her joke.

"You can talk. You're always driving ... everyone crazy!" Quinn responded with her own comeback.

"Good one, have you been saving that one up?"

Kurt raised his eyes. "As fascinating as your witty banter is, enough now, or Santana will descend into crip jokes next and we'll all be offended."

"Kin, read." Beth interrupted their reverie.

Quinn looked at Shelby.

"We went to the library to get some more. She got a copy of 'Little Red Riding Hood' but she wanted to wait to read it with you."

Quinn slid Beth down from her lap so the toddler could retrieve her book from the net slung under the seat of her stroller.

"She loves to read, but especially seems to like it with you." Shelby gave Quinn a smile.

"We'll I love reading too, so that's fine with me."

Kurt interjected wistfully, "You have the best reading voice, Quinn. It's like listening to velvety chocolate. I was always jealous in English that you got picked to read aloud all the time, but then when you started speaking, I just forgot about that and enjoyed it."

"Stop embarrassing me," she blushed.

Beth returned with her book and placed it on Quinn's knees, then put her arms up in the traditional manner to get picked up. Quinn put the book down on the coffee table for a moment and spun Beth around in front of her knees. "Stand on here," Quinn pointed to the footrest and Beth followed her instructions. "Climb up for me." Quinn sat back and was able to use both hands to pull Beth under her arms. Bet clambered up one knee at a time and then Quinn spun her around to sit in her lap where they could now comfortably read. Holding Beth tightly with one arm, she was able to reach the book without leaning forwards. Quinn puffed a sigh of relief from her lips that she had succeeded with no fuss. She could do this.

Santana wandered back over having snuck a glance at what Quinn had done and just gave her shoulders a squeeze. It was what her friends did when they were proud of her but without wanting to make a fuss and say it out loud. San crouched beside Quinn's chair and listened as her friend read the lines on each page, but also asked questions to Beth about the pictures and what she could see. She picked out colors and asked the little girl what they were, making the experience of reading so much more than just listening to words. She left after a minute or two to help with drinks and serving food.

"How are we going to seat Beth at the table? She asked Shelby. There was a chair for the toddler but not a proper high chair, however Shelby had a small folding child seat tucked under the stroller. Santana went to sort it out. There was already a space cleared for Quinn to park her chair at the table, so she arranged the child seat next to it, leaving the chair on the opposite side of Beth for Shelby.

Kurt brought out the turkey while Rachel served vegetables and Santana poured wine. Shelby stood in the kitchen trying not to get in the way, half watching Quinn and half concentrating on answering Rachel's many questions about her and Beth's life in general.

The friends were obviously close as they made thoughtful and occasional thoughtless comments, particularly Santana who constantly teased the rest. She joked about carving the turkey instead of Kurt as she was 'the token man of the house' to which Kurt pouted until she relented and handed him the knife.

Santana invited Shelby to sit in the allocated place and called Quinn over. The blonde girl put the book aside and rolled over with Beth still on her lap, pretending to be a train. Beth giggled in delight as Quinn halted the chair abruptly, throwing them both forwards a little but not so hard either fell out. Beth was helped to hop over to the chair next to her mother and sat down. Quinn locked her brakes and then turned to fasten the toddler into the seat. She held onto the side of Beth's chair.

"Shelby, can you help push her closer to the table. I can manage this side but not the whole thing."

The two of them slid the chair forwards so that Beth was fairly squashed in between the chair and the table. Clearly used to this method of eating with grownups, she was happy enough.

The food was distributed round and a quiet hum of conversation kept up while they ate. With such a lot of catching up to be done, there were no awkward quiet moments to fill and Beth being the center of attention always gave them something to talk about.

Beth had already learned everyone's names, but she was only two and a half, so struggled with some of the pronunciations. She called Shelby Momma, couldn't cope with the Q so Quinn was pronounced as Kin, Santana lost the San, Rachel was Rachie and Kurt was impossible, the hard K sound was too hard for her and so he became Turt. This was made worse because Santana then Christened him Turtle, then Uncle Turtle seemed to pop out, which Beth found amusing and it stuck. In truth, he didn't mind, he knew what Santana was doing, making something that could have been difficult seem just funny instead. She did that with Quinn all the time to make other people feel more relaxed around their friend.

"So I hear you are in a show at Easter?" Shelby asked Quinn.

"Yeah, just my theatre group. We're doing 'Much Ado About Nothing'.

"And she's playing Beatrice," Rachel couldn't allow Quinn to be modest.

"Really? That's amazing."

"I hope I can do the role justice," Quinn blushed. "I did try out for Hero as well, but apparently my wit won me the lead."

"And being the most talented actress," Rachel pointed out.

"You're biased," Santana interrupted. "She's nowhere near as much of a drama queen as you."

"That may well be true," Rachel acquiesced, "but I am allowed to be biased where Quinn is concerned; she is my girlfriend after all."

"We'll have to come and watch; you'll reserve us some tickets?" Shelby was excited for the younger woman.

"Of course, though I don't think Beth will have much of a clue what's going on."

"Yeah but she'll be going to plenty of shows throughout her life so we might as well start her on the Shakespeare early," Shelby laughed, she wanted her daughter to enjoy the arts.

"I confess to being a bit nervous about the whole thing. We just did a review last semester and I only played a small part. This whole attention thing is harder than I thought it would be."

"You wouldn't be so nervous if it wasn't for the chair and no one else even cares, so why do you?" Kurt was such a straight shooter.

"I don't care, but there will be paying members of the public this time, instead of just classmates and friends; they might care. I feel a bit exposed by that. I know I will be fine once I get out there, but I'm glad mid-terms are out of the way so I don't have that to worry about them as well. Talk about something else, I'm getting stressed at the thought of it."

"You never know where it might lead, lots of actors and actresses get a break from scouts at student productions," Shelby knew the score where Broadway was concerned.


	21. Chapter 21

Disclaimer: Still not owning Glee

Chapter 21

Lunch over and 'Little Red Riding Hood' finished, Beth played with Santana who was sitting on the rug in the living room. The pair were currently engaged in a tickle fight of mammoth proportions.

Beth kept saying over and over, "Tana stop!" but giggling so hard that Santana just did it again. Kurt went to do the dishes and Rachel sat and talked to Shelby about music for the most part whilst Quinn sat in her chair and rocked backwards and forwards watching the toddler and her friend. Eventually fed up of not being involved, Quinn decided to risk embarrassment and pulled her chair forwards a little to the edge of the rug.

"You getting down with us?" Santana asked. It was an invite to get help if she needed it, but being Santana it was disguised.

"Yep," Quinn huffed as she lifted her feet off the footrest and set the brakes. She pushed her legs further away from the chair and then levered her hips to the front of the seat so she was perched on the edge. She put her hands on the frame of the chair and pushed her bottom off the seat and lowered herself using her arms and shoulders to control the descent. It only took a couple of seconds to lower herself and then turn to remove the brakes and roll the chair back out of the way.

Quinn stretched her legs out in front of her to begin with, but then crossed them and was now in the dubious position of having to scoot around on her backside using her arms to lift herself around. But now she was at least on the same level as Beth and could play with her better. Beth had a small bag of toys and started emptying them out. There were a couple of soft toys and a doll as well as a toy phone and some costume jewelry. She gave the phone to Santana and then put a long necklace of beads around Quinn's neck.

"Uncle Turtle," Beth said to the Latina, handing her the phone.

She laughed and started shouting down the phone to Kurt who was in the kitchen.

"Pretty," Beth said to Quinn adding another necklace. Santana got a bracelet of the same beads next and then Rachel shortly afterwards.

"What songs does Beth like?" Rachel asked her mother.

"Well, you may want to educate her about show tunes one day because at the moment she seems to like anything by the Muppets, which gets a lot of airtime in pre-school, plus Michael Jackson, you know things like 'ABC' or 'Black or White' I think it's because it has words in that she recognizes, you know colors and stuff. She seems to like anything upbeat."

Rachel went to the stereo and put on her Michael Jackson playlist. 'ABC' was actually the first song on there so she played the tunes in order. They were all singing along in no time and the afternoon just vanished.

Shelby had actually really enjoyed herself for the first time in the company of her daughter. Rachel was much less intense and needy than on the previous occasions they had met. She also found herself admiring the mother of her adoptive daughter more and more as time passed. She saw a much more intelligent and well-rounded human being than previously.

Beth had a wonderful time, with Quinn and Santana especially, both of whom had a natural affinity for children. Kurt and Rachel were both more reserved, but as only children that was understandable. As she looked at her watch and realized that it was five o'clock, Shelby watched Quinn, now lying on her back draped in costume jewelry, arms outstretched above her chest and Beth in her hands doing an impression of an aircraft. Quinn might not be able to lift Beth from her stroller without losing her balance, but with her back on the floor, she was strong as anything. She kept bending her arms so that Beth's head lowered and she could kiss her, then pushing her back up to fly around some more.

Santana sat beside them just watching and being ready to jump in if Quinn's arms tired, which of course they didn't because they were like steel these days, so mostly she just laughed at them and tickled Beth's bare feet, her shoes and socks having been abandoned some time ago.

"Guys, I think we are going to have to make a move." Shelby was torn because Beth was having such a lovely time, but she needed to get home and sort out things for the week ahead.

"Okay, San can you take her from me?" Quinn released the toddler to her friend who deposited Beth on the rug.

"Shoes and socks, Beth." Santana sat the little girl down in the space between her legs and started to redress her playmate. "Did you have fun with Aunty Tana?"

The curly head bobbed up and down.

Quinn pushed up onto her elbows and then sat upright. She was some way from her chair now and looked around to see just how far, but needn't have worried.

Beth now with shoes back on went to the back of Quinn's chair and pushed it, somewhat clumsily forwards. She ran it into the coffee table, but Santana jumped up and straightened it out. It was a bizarre little moment ending in Beth saying 'Kin, 'troller."

Quinn and Santana just laughed at it.

"She caught on quick," the darker girl smiled and turned to the toddler. "Good girl, Beth."

"Thanks, San. I got it now." Quinn scooted back against the frame and crossed her legs, then pushed up on the frame to get back in. It was an easy move she did all the time at the pool, so she was in quickly and seated properly. But then found herself bemused again as Beth had snuck around the side and now tried to lift her foot up for her. Shaking her head, Quinn pulled under her knee so that she had the weight of her leg, whilst Beth placed her foot down. They did the other one the same way. "How did she know to do that?" Quinn looked up at Shelby who shrugged.

"I haven't said anything to her. I was going to wait until she could understand a bit better or asked me herself."

"Kid's obviously got brains," Santana announced softly shaking her head. "She worked it out for herself, even if she doesn't know why." Standing, Santana went to get coats for their guests.

Rachel stood and collected Kurt from the kitchen to say goodbye, San was preoccupied putting Beth's coat on so Quinn took her opportunity to speak to Shelby alone.

"Shelby, can I ask you a favor? I was wondering if we could meet up one day. I have something I want to talk to you about."

Shelby looked at the blonde girl. "What's the matter?"

"Nothing. I would just rather do it in private with the two of us. It's nothing sinister, I promise, in fact it's the very opposite. I just don't want an audience for it. I finish classes on Wednesday at eleven and thought maybe I could get a taxi over to the East Side and meet you for lunch. I only need half an hour or so, if you can get away from work for a little while."

"I get an hour at twelve if that's any good."

"Perfect. If you let me have the address, I'll meet you outside at twelve."

They exchanged details and cell numbers.

Quinn looked up at the older woman. "I just wanted to say thanks for today too. I'm so happy right now, you wouldn't believe it. This is the best day I've had since she was born." Quinn didn't realize that a tear had formed until she blinked and it started rolling down her face. "She's amazing and you are the reason. I am so glad you wanted her."

"Thank you for letting me have her; she is like a precious gift and the most important thing in the world to me." Shelby wasn't an overly emotional person, but she stepped forwards and gave Quinn a long hug. She stood up and stroked the blonde hair beneath her hands. "Everything is going to work out fine for all of us, you know that right." Quinn didn't reply to her, but she felt the head nod beneath her hands. Shelby felt that Quinn herself could do with a little more mothering. She knelt and looked Quinn in the eyes. "Thank you for today, I know it's hard for you to say goodbye to her. I'll see you on Wednesday and it won't be too long until you see her again."

Quinn escaped the Upper campus as quickly as possible and made her way out of the east gate onto Amsterdam Avenue. It took a few minutes to hail a cab but one stopped and pulled over with the back door by a low curb so she could get in.

It took twenty minutes to skirt the northern edge of Central Park down to 5th Avenue, but the taxi driver was savvy enough to get off there quickly because it was thick with traffic. He dodged down 102nd Street past Mount Sinai Hospital where she went occasionally to see a physical therapist at the rehab center. Eventually he pulled up outside the address Shelby had given her. The driver helped her with her chair and she tipped him a little extra as he was nice about it.

She didn't wait outside the pre-school as she was thirty minutes early, but went for a roll down the block to find somewhere suitable for lunch. It was always a bit embarrassing to turn up somewhere and find she couldn't actually get in the place. She found a couple of suitable places within a five minute walk, so headed back to Shelby's workplace.

She waited outside as agreed. Shelby found her, back to the wall, resting on the back wheels alone. The front of the wheelchair was tipped up so she could warm her face, daydreaming in the sunshine.

"Hi."

"Oh hey," Quinn shrugged her shoulders from where they were resting on the wall and the front wheels dropped to the ground.

"Is that safe?"

"Probably not," Quinn grinned at the older woman. "Thanks for this, it means a lot."

"Well I'm very curious about why you wanted to meet in private. It all sounds mysterious."

"It's not, trust me. Do you have a favorite lunch spot?"

"There is a small Italian café round the corner if that suits you?" Shelby pointed the way.

"I saw it earlier. I had some time to kill so I went for a walk around the block. It's nice round this part of the city."

"I get a mix of people bringing their kids though. Lots of theatrical types; I still have a lot of contacts in the business, plus health care workers from the hospital and professionals from the big companies around the area."

"I go to Mt Sinai rehab every once in a while."

"I thought Rachel said you were through with rehab when I dropped in on you the other week," Shelby was curious.

"I am, but I go see a physical therapist now and again, just to keep tabs on my condition and make sure I'm looking after myself properly."

"She said that it was a pretty serious injury."

"It's almost complete, which means not much chance that I'll ever recover. Even if they come up with new treatments, it's not likely to help me."

"Sorry, I shouldn't really pry into your health."

"Don't be. I don't mind talking about it you know. I tend to live with no regrets now and I find it helps people treat me normally if they understand what happened."

"I noticed."

"Santana." Quinn rolled her eyes.

Shelby nodded.

Quinn laughed. "She does it deliberately. She wouldn't admit it if you asked her but she cares about her friends a massive amount and pretends to be all hard just 'cause she's from Lima Heights originally, but really she's a total softy. She takes it personally if anyone upsets me, even inadvertently, so she tries her best to stave it off by calling me names and teasing. I give her some back. We have a laugh about it and everyone stops being so sensitive. It's funny that we're the ones to help other people feel better about themselves, when it's me stuck in the chair. I thought everyone would feel sorry for me, but I feel sorry for them instead."

"When Rachel said you had changed, she didn't do you justice, you know? I don't think I have seen anyone become quite the polar opposite in such a short space of time."

They arrived at the café and went inside to find a table. They ordered food and drink and then as they waited for it to come, Quinn pulled her backpack from the rear of her chair and took out an envelope.

"The reason I wanted to talk to you is inside this envelope, but I wanted to explain first. It's to do with the accident. Because neither Rachel or I were to blame, we made a claim against the driver and the trucking company for our injuries. They were both at fault. Rachel got paid out pretty quickly as her injuries were less complicated and she was given a substantial settlement for her medical bills and the pain and suffering she went through. It isn't enough to live on for the rest of her life, but it means she doesn't have to worry about student loans and tuition fees as a result."

"I didn't realize, she didn't mention it."

"She doesn't like to think about it too much. It upsets her that I came out of it so much worse. They call it survivor's guilt. It's a form of PTSD I guess. Anyway my situation was more complicated. I was in hospital much longer, my medical bills were astronomical and I will have ongoing expenses for the rest of my life as well as other things like adaptive housing and possibly not getting proper work and the pain and suffering thing, so LeRoy helped to get the insurance settlement sorted for me. It took a while but he was pretty confident I wouldn't have to go to court."

"Why was he so sure?"

"He said there was no way the companies would want me in front of the judge."

"Why?"

"These aren't my words I have you know. LeRoy said they wouldn't want and I quote, a beautiful, young, talented, intelligent, former cheerleader sat in a wheelchair in court because they would lose their shirts. Oh I forgot innocent as well."

"He has a point," Shelby smiled.

"I know. He used it to good effect. Anyway, we heard on Thanksgiving that they settled for a sickening amount that still doesn't seem real to me, but let's just say that even after the legal and medical bills were cleared and my Mom reluctantly let me pay her back the cost of adapting our house, the amount left over is considerable. I need some for the cost of managing my disability and accommodation and that is set aside. Hiram sorted it all out so that each pot of money is invested for a specific purpose so that they grow at the right amount and will last. The money that is mine to do with as I please is the compensation for the pain and suffering. I figure I will use some of it for travelling because I still want to see more of the world, but I also have a responsibility in Beth. I know Puck is as much to blame for what happened, but I need to know that I am fulfilling my responsibilities for bringing her into the world, so I want to give you this." Quinn slid the envelope across the table.

"It's a trust fund. You don't need to do anything except maybe put that in a fireproof box and it absolutely has no strings attached. It's in Beth's name and only she can touch it when she's eighteen. I am never going to hold it over your head or hers. I will never even tell her that it's from me, that is entirely up to you if you choose, but I wanted to give it to you now because it means that when she's old enough to consider what she wants to do, maybe college or similar, you have an open choice. If she wants she can go to Harvard, Yale or Stanford, even Oxford or Cambridge can be hers. It means you don't have to make a compromise on her education. It's not a gift or a bargaining chip; it's a responsibility."

"Quinn, I don't know what to say."

"Don't say anything, just take it. And if you need anything else for her, you just have to ask. I know you will always take care of her, but if there is anything really important and she can't live without it, promise me you'll ask. I don't want her to be spoilt, but I wouldn't want hardship for her either. I was totally spoilt as a child and look where it got me. I was allowed whatever I wanted so long as my father thought it made us look like the perfect family, but I didn't get love when I needed it. My friend Sam has had the opposite, years of poverty and constantly changing schools because his parents had to keep moving around for work. He has love but such a disrupted education that he is struggling academically. I don't want either of those extremes for her."

"Thank you. This is exceptionally generous in the circumstances. I know that you love her a great deal. I won't tell her about this until she is older, but I think she should know maybe when she starts high school that this is waiting for her. I also think that she should know it's from you and that it was given out of love."

"Then the debt would be mine, because I really do love her. I wish I had been older and wiser before she came along and that I would have been in a position to care for her myself, but who am I kidding? Look at me. I would have been a terrible mother at sixteen with my parents as role models. Besides, the accident has changed everything. I was pretty dependent for months afterwards and my mother had a hard enough time looking after me let alone a small child as well."

"You know that things change and you will make a great mother in the future. Take care of yourself and use some of that money to invest in a family when the time is right. Look at me, I never thought I would get a second chance and thanks to you, I have."

"I know that now. I am pretty good at taking care of myself now and I would love to have another chance at being a parent when the time is right. I would love that to be with Rachel as well. Are you really okay with us being together or are you disappointed?"

"Honestly, I was just surprised, not disappointed. It wouldn't have occurred to me that the two of you would ever get on, especially as you seemed to be fighting over the same boy for years, let alone get together as a couple." Shelby smiled.

"It is the very definition of irony I think." Quinn grinned. "But we care deeply for one another and I promise you that I will look after her for as long as she will let me."

"I know you will, Quinn."


	22. Chapter 22

A/N Thanks to everyone who has been kind enough to leave feedback, including those who haven't enjoyed recent chapters. I would say that if you don't like it, it's helpful to know why, otherwise what's the point in just saying you don't like it?

To those who have offered advice and ideas, I am especially grateful, but curiously most of the suggestions are already written in, they just haven't appeared yet. One or two suggestions were particularly good though and they will be included. If anyone else wants to see a particular scene written, let me know and I will put it in if it fits well with the story. I haven't entirely decided how long I will keep going for, I guess until it either reaches a natural conclusion or I run out of ideas. I am also just watching the start of season 5 so that might help me out a little as well.

I am trying not to post so often that I am unable to provide regular updates. So much of the story so far was already written and I don't want to leave it ages before I post the next chapter so expect more of a drip feed instead of a deluge from now on as I am rapidly getting closer to the last of the chapters I already had complete before I started posting.

Anyway - enough rambling, on with the story!

Disclaimer: blah blah, woof woof - I don't own Glee and I'm not getting paid for this.

Chapter 22

Later that evening, Quinn arrived back at her dorm room dog tired. She had just had a swim meet and her arms were pretty wrecked. Rachel was chattering away behind her as they got to the door. On such occasions, Quinn was more than happy to take a grateful push up the ramp and have the door held for her.

"Are you going to stay over or go back to your place?" Quinn asked as she opened her door and let Rach in. The diminutive singer dropped Quinn's kit bag, that she had insisted on carrying back, on the floor and shrugged.

"I should go back really, but I don't want to."

"Don't feel obligated to stay if you have things to do."

"I don't feel obligated, I want to stay."

Quinn huffed a little as she emptied her kit bag. She was really tired and a little irritated that she hadn't swum a new PB as she hoped she might. The last few weeks had been full of emotion and distractions.

"What's the matter?" Rachel moved to sit on the bed so they could be eye-to-eye.

"Nothing important." Quinn shrugged.

There were still times when she went off to a dark place, hiding her true feelings. The difference with Quinn now was that she didn't take it out on anyone else as she had in the past, she just swallowed it and became a bit uncommunicative.

Rachel didn't push, she just took one of Quinn's hands in her own and gently rubbed her thumb across her palm. Rachel's beautifully kept nails and skin was a bit of a contrast to Quinn's. Now she used her hands for everything, her skin was hardened in places. Rachel's thumb ran over the callouses that had formed at the base of each finger from pushing the wheels on her chair. Quinn no longer wore gloves to protect the skin, it was pointless; they often didn't last more than a week before holes appeared. It didn't matter now, the callouses stopped blisters forming and she only resorted to gloves when it rained, because wet hands meant she couldn't actually grip the rims to slow herself and there had been some interesting near misses going down a ramp, or when it was bitterly cold to keep her hands warm. Similarly, the nail polish she had insisted on wearing still after the accident had disappeared for the most part because she chipped it so often it was pointless; she only bothered if there was a special occasion now.

"Okay, I'll tell you what's going on," Quinn gave Rachel a hesitant smile. I'm worried about my part in 'Much Ado'."

"Why, because I saw your rehearsal last week and I thought it was brilliant. Your dry wit is perfect and the facial expressions are so well timed."

"Yes but I wasn't anticipating getting such a big part and now that I have, I'm worried about how well it's going to go down."

"Why don't you actually voice what's bothering you," Rachel tried to tease out the insecurity.

Quinn huffed. "Because I don't want to be a moaner about it."

Rachel rolled her eyes. "It's not moaning. You're not complaining, you are voicing concerns. It's not the same thing at all."

"It feels like I'm moaning and I shouldn't be. Other people wanted that part and I shouldn't complain that I got it, because if I hadn't, you can bet I would have complained even more." She allowed herself a small smile. Truth be told, the last thing she had expected was to be given the lead, even if it was only a student project. "What if I am no good, or not very credible?"

"At last, we get to the truth. You are still worrying about what other people will think about the chair."

Quinn's head dropped. "How can I not worry about it? It's kind of obvious and can't be hidden, so…." She shrugged.

Rachel was deep in thought for a moment or two. "Why do you think you got the part?"

"I don't know. One of the seniors is directing and he said it was a good character match. Apparently, I came across as understanding the role rather than just remembering lines. He said that I was able to get Beatrice's wit across."

"And how long did it take you to get to know your classmates back in September and convince them that the chair is not important?"

"Not long I guess," she wondered where Rachel was going with this.

"So then it's entirely feasible that you were chosen because you are a really good actress and that after a short time no one takes much notice of the chair. Can you give the audience some credit for being able to see past it as well? It's not being done in Elizabethan costume either, a modern setting allows you to have more, what did you call it, credibility."

"I guess. Did you really think the rehearsal was okay? There's only like four weeks to opening night, so I'm beginning to freak."

"What did you tell me about the Winter Showcase? I was fretting because freshmen don't usually get a chance to perform."

"I told you that you aren't usual, so there was nothing to fret about." Quinn sighed.

"The same applies to you. What is unusual about you now is also one of the things that makes you unforgettable. There are plenty of pretty actresses out there and some of them can even sing, though they won't make me melt into a puddle the way you do," Rachel smiled coyly. "And your speaking voice is dreamy, but now you have this other thing that makes everyone pay attention and singles you out from the rest. Even if it's not how you saw your life turning out in the past, this is an opportunity to make a statement and you should embrace it. There must be lots of people out there who would love an opportunity to do something like this and they never get the chance because of what they look like and somehow you have managed to get around that and win people over. Why can't you see that the audience will just as likely be won over as well?"

Rachel reached forwards and pulled Quinn closer so their knees were touching.

The blonde met her gaze and saw only truth from Rachel as always. "This is why I love you, you know. No matter what else goes on in my crazy distorted view of the world, I know that when you tell me something, it is absolutely how things really are. Thanks." Quinn leaned forward until their lips met and they were drawn into a breathtaking kiss.

Rachel shuffled forwards onto Quinn's knees so they didn't have to lean awkwardly anymore. "I know I should go back to my place, but I'm staying tonight. Can I borrow something to wear for my dance class in the morning?"

Quinn raised an eyebrow. "We might have to take a pair of scissors to anything of mine or it will be too long."

Rachel punched her gently in the shoulder. "You are in no position to make fun of my height these days, Quinn Fabray."

"I know, I was kind of being serious, my pants are all pretty long, even if they fit you round the hips. I might have some cropped yoga pants, but they'll probably look ridiculous on you." Quinn grinned. "Carmen's too tall and Mel's too wide to lend you anything either. Can't you just get Kurt to bring something in with him?"

"I didn't think about that." Rachel took her phone out and began texting Kurt. "All sorted, he's going to meet me off the bus."

"So where were we?" Quinn grinned, wrapping her arms around the petite brunette.

"Here, I think," Rachel leaned in for yet another long, tender kiss on full lips.

Quinn lay in on her side in her small bed with Rachel's head tucked beneath her own and the deep breathing indicating the smaller girl was fast asleep. They had enjoyed a little contact but nothing heavy, Quinn just wanted to hold her. Her arm lay across Rachel's ribs and although she couldn't feel her legs, she knew they were tucked behind Rachel's. The first time they had slept together, as opposed to _slept_ together had been a bit odd. Quinn was used to propping herself with pillows rather than a person, but Rachel had tucked inside her and allowed Quinn to just relax onto the compact little body. It had been nice to have the warmth of someone else radiating into her belly. They had found themselves instantly at ease, which until then hadn't occurred to either of them.

Rachel snuffled slightly and wriggled around which she did often, but stayed within the sort of cocoon formed by Quinn around her. It was odd, but Quinn felt sort of protective of her little superstar in the making when they were together like this.

As the morning came, Rachel yawned and stretched, forgetting briefly that they were in Quinn's bed, not hers. The movement was just enough to tip Quinn onto her back, but fortunately not out of the bed altogether, which had happened on one occasion. The taller girl just didn't realize when her lower body started to go and by the time she knew she was going down, it was too late to prevent the rest of her from falling. She had a nicely bruised butt cheek for three days after that for which Rachel had apologized endlessly, only to have Quinn quirk an eyebrow every single time and reply "never felt a thing!"

Quinn just laid back and let Rachel peel herself off the bed first. The brunette ran into the bathroom to pee urgently. The taller girl flexed and stretched her arms, satisfied that the fatigue from her swimming had dissipated overnight and she felt fine. Pushing up on her hands, she sat back against the wall and yawned. She had slept well and was looking forward to her classes that day. Quinn had always been good at learning and away from the confines of the high school curriculum, she was engaged in some seriously good work at present. It was a far cry from Lima, Ohio. She had been a little concerned that at least educationally, an undergrad program at Yale would be better than Columbia, but now she was there, it seemed like it was meant to be.

They both showered and dressed, then went into the kitchen to get breakfast. There were other students in there despite it being early. Carmen was up and in her pajamas eating toast, but her roommate was nowhere to be seen. There was another freshman in there called Julia, who was in running gear, whom Rachel briefly remembered from a party, but hadn't spoken to much before.

"Morning," Carmen spoke with a croaky voice that suggested she had been up late.

"Hi," Quinn gave her a high five as she rolled past and went to the fridge. "Late night?"

"We partied 'til three, but I gotta lecture this morning. Mel's out of it."

Rachel smiled at her and gave her a wave. "You look like you could use a little more sleep."

"Thanks, I feel worse than I look." Carmen ate another mouthful of toast. "Haven't seen the two of you much this last few weeks?" She raised her eyebrows, well aware of their relationship.

"Well we have been staying over at mine a little more regularly than here, but for no particular reason." Rachel supplied.

"Apart from the bigger bed!" Quinn replied dryly with a cheeky half-smile.

Julia laughed and almost spat out a mouthful of orange juice, alerting Quinn to the fact that she may have shared a little too much.

"Shit, Quinn. TMI."

"Sorry, Joolz. Didn't mean to make you choke. You remember Rachel?"

She nodded, clearing her throat and waved back to the shorter girl. "I do, party last semester."

Rachel smiled. "Sorry we've not been around much."

"How are rehearsals going for the play, Quinn?"

Quinn groaned at Carmen's question. "Okay, just me having a bad attack of self-doubt. What were they thinking putting a freshman in a wheelchair, as lead female and what was I thinking letting them?"

Carmen chuckled. "Serves you right for being pretty and talented."

"See that's exactly what I said," Rachel folded her arms indignantly and staring at Quinn.

"Sometimes you are really irritating, even when you are right," the blonde looked at her.

"Yes, but that's why I'm lovable. Admit it, you love it when I am forthright and honest." Rachel tried to look sweet and innocent.

"You see what I have to put up with," Quinn threw a box of granola at Rachel. "Here, little miss vegan. Eat your oats."

Rachel caught the box neatly and set it down so she could look for a couple of bowls while Quinn brought milk over. They sat and ate breakfast quietly after that and talked to the other two girls.

The weather was still chilly but improving as Quinn flew down the ramp and waited at the bottom for Rachel to catch her up. "Have a good day. Will I see you later?" Rachel asked.

"I have to study tonight. Want to go out tomorrow though?"

"Where do you fancy?"

"I'll ask around, see where everyone else is going. I'm guessing San's working but Kurt might want to come, will you ask him?"

"Sure," Rachel leaned in to give Quinn a kiss, bold as you like in the middle of the sidewalk. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Text me," Quinn replied and spun off in the opposite direction.

Rachel watched her roll away and felt a little sting of loneliness that she was gone already.

The following afternoon, Quinn was in rehearsals again, as she was every Friday. Her leading man, a senior called Marcus was sat beside her in the front row of the auditorium. She had abandoned her chair and had her feet up, legs crossed, resting on the seat of the wheelchair in front of her. Marcus's feet were similarly propped on one of the rear wheels of her chair and the two were perfectly comfortable as they read through lines with each other. They both laughed occasionally, sometimes even before a line was spoken because they often knew what was coming next and the anticipation got too much.

Rachel sneaked into the back and watched the interplay between Quinn and Marcus as they danced around each other verbally, just as the play called for. His Benedick was quick and sure of himself, full of bravado. Her Beatrice was clever and constantly playing off his comments with the derisory wit that was so important to two of Shakespeare's funniest and clever characters.

Rachel eventually felt a little guilty for watching without alerting them to her presence and so she walked down to the front and cleared her throat.

"Hey, how's it going?"

Quinn turned her head and looked up. Marcus dropped his feet and sat straighter as though he had been caught doing something he shouldn't.

"Good, we were just running through lines for the last scene. We're about to run it with everyone if you want to watch and give us your critical feedback." Quinn shuffled her hips back and dropped her legs down. "Sit for a minute, the rest are in the rehearsal room next door, but it was so noisy, we escaped in here." She neatly pulled her chair closer and shifted into it without even putting the brakes on. "I'm just going to the little girl's room. Back in five." Quinn leaned across and gave Rachel a quick kiss before shoving up the slope to the doors at the back.

"How are you coping with the banter? It seems to be going well from what I could see."

Marcus nodded. "Quinn's awesome, especially for a freshman. Was she a good actress in school? She said the two of you were at the same high school."

"She didn't really do much acting as such, but she was always a great performer." Rachel's answer was a bit cryptic, but she didn't know how much Marcus knew about Quinn's past or how much she wanted him to know.

"Not sure where she gets it from then, but she's really good. Plus, you know, she has like the sexiest voice ever."

Rachel laughed. "That's very true. Have you heard her sing yet?"

"Don't get me going, I was in the review show last semester, she had every man in here drooling. I mean, that was before we knew that the two of you were…. you know…" he ran out of words.

Rachel smiled. "I know, she kind of has that effect on everyone."

The rest of the cast started to filter in and Marcus jumped up on stage and waited for Quinn to return which she did a couple of minutes later, but not through the auditorium, rather she came from the backstage area where she could access it.

The scene was brilliant and the wording flawless. Quinn was in her element as she finally relented to the charms of Marcus as Benedick. Rachel laughed out loud quite a few times, but was also moved as Hero was finally united with her man as well. The only issue seemed to be that Quinn got a little lost to the audience at times as people moved around her on stage. The director must have realized this as well, because he kept stopping some of the movement and pausing cast members so that they could play with the staging positions. After about three tries, the director seemed happier with this and they ran through one final time before calling it a day.

He jumped up to talk to Quinn briefly and Rachel saw some heads nodding. The cast broke apart and Quinn rolled up to the front of the stage. Whenever she was unsure of herself, Quinn had a habit of chewing the inside of her lip. "What did you think?"

Rachel stood and approached with a big grin. "_Really_ good," she reflected on why she thought that. "The lighting needs work, but the dialogue was awesome and timing pretty much perfect in the last run."

"Hang on a minute," Quinn spun and shouted after the senior who was directing. "Juan!" The tall Hispanic student turned and moved back towards her.

"Yeah?"

"Come talk to my girlfriend," she nodded. "Rach, tell him about the lighting. You're better with this techie stuff than me."

Rachel was rarely self-conscious but she hadn't meant to interfere so started with an apology. "Sorry, I am not an expert..."

"Oh please," Quinn interrupted and rolled her eyes. "Just tell him!"

"Okay, well since you asked. I was watching you stopping some of the cast moving in front of Quinn when she delivers her lines, because, well, she is shorter than everyone else in her chair and it detracts from the dramatic poise if there is just a voice being heard. I wondered if it would help to have the stage darker in general and then throw a spot on whoever is speaking, because that would add to the drama of the piece and it would mean Quinn doesn't get lost amongst the rest of the cast on stage. It's a busy scene and it was quite hard to track where her voice was coming from sometimes. You don't want to make the audience have to work hard looking around for the actor, it's a distraction, especially with Shakespeare because just understanding the dialogue can be difficult."

Juan considered the idea. "Let's give it a try. I need to see where the spots are at the moment." He went backstage briefly and several spot lights came on a moment later. He looked around the stage and picked three that he liked. Flicking through the script, he scribbled some notes here and there. "We need to run this with just you first, Quinn. If we have a read through and then have you move from one spot to another in between, it might be better than constantly pausing everyone else. We can choreograph around you then." He turned to Rachel. "That was a great idea. We have dress rehearsal next weekend, fancy watching it through with me and giving me some feedback? I haven't directed anyone in a wheelchair before so it's a bit of a learning curve for us." He turned back to the blonde freshman and gave Quinn a squeeze on the shoulder then. "Thanks, you're being very patient with us."

Quinn just shrugged. "It's all new to me too."

"Great work, see you in the bar later?" He nodded at Rachel as well and went out backstage.

"Ready to go?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah, but I can't be bothered to go all the way around. I'm going to bounce down the steps if you will lift my chair down?"

Rachel hadn't seen this before, and looked a little concerned. "Bounce?"

Quinn rolled her eyes. "Not literally. There's only you here, so it's not embarrassing." She rolled to the side, near the steps and put on the brakes. Quinn slipped easily to the wooden boards of the stage and dropped her legs down the side of the steps. There were only five and she just needed to lower herself down the top three to sit level with the seat of her chair. She dropped her legs nonchalantly off the next step down and then, weight on hands lowered her hips down. After she cleared the three steps, she waited for Rachel to lift her chair down and roll it close as possible. Without even bothering to secure the brakes, she slipped from the step to the seat of her chair in a single fluid motion, pivoting her hips as she did so.

"Is that a new trick?" Rachel asked.

"I've done it before, and I don't mind you seeing it, but it causes a bit of a fuss so I don't like doing it in front of other people so much. I mean I would if it was an emergency, but otherwise I'd rather not have people see me like a fish out of water."

It was an interesting comment, but also quite observant.

"Is that how you feel when you're not in your chair?"

Quinn started to roll up towards the exit with Rachel beside her. "I guess," she nodded. "I sort of feel stranded and I don't like it when I can't see it or if it's too far away from me."

Rachel nodded thoughtfully. "It's funny how your opinion changes about something over time. I know you must have hated it at first."

"Yeah, I did. But I'm lucky though because I have seen other people out and about in wheelchairs since we moved here and most of them suck compared to mine. Made me appreciate it all the more."

"I have seen that as well. I'm so relieved that Dad was able to help you with the insurance."

"I was thinking about that you know. I want to do something this summer, travel a bit. Now I'm more comfortable with it. Would you like to go somewhere together? I was thinking about asking Santana and Kurt maybe as well because it might be easier for you to share the burden between you if we have issues. I suspect travelling with me could be more difficult than usual. If you would just rather it was the two of us I don't mind either. I know you spend a lot of time with them so you might want a break.

"I don't mind either of them tagging along if you want. To be honest, Kurt and I don't see that much of Santana, especially during the week and she only gets Sunday off at the weekend. I say that but a day with her is like a week with anyone else. With San you always get all of her, if you know what I mean."

Quinn gave a wry smile. "You mean unlike me, where you never get everything?"

Rachel smiled. "With San you get all of her and it all comes out of her mouth, I suppose a bit like me, but with you there's still always a restraint in your words, but never your eyes. I don't know if you are aware, but we always knew at school when you were telling the truth or hiding something and over the years, I suppose I learned to read them better. Now I don't need you to say everything that you are feeling, because I just look at you and I know."

"I'm sorry I'm not as open with my thoughts as the rest of you. I guess it's just how I learned to behave when I was younger and I don't really know how else to be."

Rachel stopped her and held out a hand. She took hold of Quinn's and looked at her. "You are who you are and I think only you doubt your self-worth, Quinn."

"Apart from my parents, you mean."

And that was the seat of all her problems, still after all she had lived through. The lack of understanding at a particularly vulnerable time in her life and it had screwed her up.

"You dad is an ass!"

"Rachel!" Quinn was a little shocked, even if she agreed with the sentiment; Rachel rarely cursed.

"Everyone knows it. I can't believe he hasn't seen you since the accident. What parent wouldn't go to see his daughter if she was critically injured in the hospital, even after everything else. At least your Mom has finally woken up to her responsibilities."

"It's not the same as the relationship with your dads though is it? They have encouraged you to be yourself and only that since the day they had you."

"That still doesn't change the fact that you are amazing and I love you more than anything or anyone in the World."

"But why? I am not the best at anything Rach. Honestly, you and I know that even at school there was always someone better than me at pretty much everything, never mind in comparison to the rest of the planet." Quinn was confused again. She had struggled pretty much her whole life to understand her value as a human being.

"Pffff." Rachel made an obvious sound of disagreement.

"Okay, so what was I actually better at than anyone else? And don't say having babies, that's not actually a talent."

Rachel was lost in thought for a moment and that was all that Quinn needed to list the things that she wasn't the best at. "You are a better singer, so were all the girls really, bar Sugar, but honestly the kids from the deaf school were more in tune so that doesn't count."

"Quinn! You can't say that."

"Of course I can, I'm a crip." She shrugged. "So Santana was easily a better cheerleader, Brit's a better dancer, same goes for you. I don't play the guitar, the drums or the piano. I wasn't very successful at celibacy and after what happened last year to the both of us, my relationship with God has been on shaky ground. So how am I amazing? Really, because everyone keeps telling me, but I just don't see it. I thought I had nailed life because I managed to improve my appearance but that's not actually an achievement worth anything is it? The only thing I can think of that I am good at is faking it and that doesn't make me worthy of your adoration."

Rachel looked around her and just decided she didn't care who saw them. She sat down in Quinn's lap. "Out of everyone in our school, you probably had the most to lose from day one and if you want to look at the world that way, over the course of three years, you lost most of the things that seemed important. You lost your place on the Cheerio's three times, you had to suffer the indignity of being pregnant at school, you made some mistakes of your own creation that's true, but that didn't change the fact that each time those things happened you made it back to the top. Each and every time, Quinn. Most of us fall apart when something terrible happened, but you always managed to get it together and keep on top." Rachel placed her arms around her girlfriend's neck. "Look at my reaction to getting tonsillitis, I was hysterical over a stupid sore throat. You nearly died and yet here you are about to star in a play, putting everything out there for people to judge you even though it scares you. You get in the pool and swim against able-bodied competitors, knowing that you probably can't win and yet you still make yourself do it, when everyone else would just give up. The reason that your friends are in awe is not because of your beautiful face, though it's very easy to love that face," she gave her a kiss on the cheek, "it's because you can't be stopped. It's just not possible to prevent Quinn Fabray from being amazing. Today, you bounced down those stairs, even though you admitted to me that being out of your chair makes you feel uncomfortable. But you did it anyway. I've seen you do that so many times. You did it a few weeks ago when Shelby came to lunch with Beth. You do it every time you go swimming. It's not that you don't care what people think and do those things, it's that when you are afraid of something, you just go ahead and do it anyway. You swallow fear, literally. The rest of us find that much harder to do than you. We're mortal and you're Superwoman." Rachel shrugged.

Quinn just laughed at her. It was one of the longest rambling monologues she had heard Rachel give, but was just so very her. "I'm not Superwoman," Quinn rolled her eyes. After a few moments thought she added "I might be Batgirl though!" She winked at the brunette.

Rachel looked at Quinn's face and noticed that her eyes were smiling. She shook her head. "I would love to travel with you, but I absolutely insist on paying my way. I had planned to work for the most part, but that would allow me to save some money up. Do you know where you would like to go?"

"Not too far for the first trip I suppose, I need to find some confidence initially. Warm and sunny would be nice, but with plenty to do and see. I don't want to just lie on a beach all the time. Besides sand and wheels don't mix well." She grinned.

"Maybe you should research places that are considered wheelchair friendly for a vacation and see what turns up."

"Good idea, but I don't want to feel like a senior citizen either and play it too safe. I want a bit of adventure with a safety net for the first trip. Let me know if you have any ideas. Ask San and Kurt what they think maybe."

Rachel nodded and stood up finally. "Why Batgirl and not Superwoman? You are blonde and Batgirl was definitely a redhead I seem to remember."

Quinn shook her head. "Batgirl was just smart, no superpowers. I think that's a much more fitting comparison. Besides, she's a crip now too."

Rachel looked at her bemused.

"It's true. She got shot by the Joker and is a paraplegic. She is one of my people!"

Rachel rolled her eyes at that one. "Can I remind you that you only have one friend who is disabled. Please note my use of the politically correct terminology here as well. Even handicapable is better than crip. Santana is a bad influence sometimes. Why don't you have more disabled friends by the way? I thought you might want to talk to other people who have experienced what you have. Are you worried about belonging to a societal group who are considered outside the mainstream?"

"Please," Quinn huffed. "I joined Glee Club didn't I?"

"Why then?"

"I don't honestly know. I kind of raced through rehab so I could get back to school and I was younger than everyone else, the rest were all older guys. I suppose I might have spent more time with my mentor if I hadn't come to college. Plus I had all of you and Artie was great at helping me cope so I guess I just didn't take the time." Quinn eyed Rachel. "Do you think I'm avoiding it deliberately?"

"Not at all, I just wondered."

"I don't think I am, but maybe I do see myself as being a bit superior still. I mean, I look normal right? Apart from the wheelchair, you wouldn't know that I was disabled at first glance." She chewed her lip again. "Do you think I am sort of pretending that there's nothing wrong with me? I am kind of being a bit gung-ho about everything. Stop me if I tell you I'm going to climb Everest, please. Maybe that's why I haven't found it hard to make new, able-bodied friends, because of the way I look." She was the one rambling now and although she was being sincere, Rachel found it cute that HBIC Quinn would never have allowed the vulnerable self-doubt to show like she was just then.

"Come on," Rachel held her hand out to her girlfriend and gave a tug on her arm to start her rolling along Broadway. Quinn hooked on to Rachel, but didn't let go as the brunette expected. Instead she kept her hand where it was. Surprisingly it was no effort to keep the chair rolling between Quinn pushing the opposite wheel with one hand and Rachel balancing it out with her momentum. "It's a good job neither you nor the chair weighs much, I'm not very big." Rachel pretended it was hard work, but the action of rolling along hand in hand felt completely natural and something they hadn't done before.

"Your my little pocket rocket," Quinn grinned at her. "You know why I don't like anyone pushing me?"

"I always assumed it was to do with wanting to be independent," Rachel responded.

"It is, sort of. Even when my arms and shoulders ache, I still hate it. Partly because I like being in control, but also because it's almost impossible to carry on a conversation with whoever is pushing unless I shout. This I could get to like though, it's just how everybody else walks when they're in love." Rachel felt Quinn squeeze her hand.

In The Heights, their favorite bar, later that evening, Kurt arrived with Michael in tow. He was currently torn between forgiving Blaine and allowing him back in his bed, or sealing the deal with Michael, so to speak. They had dated plenty, but Kurt was wary of being hurt again. He was also having a hard time over the recent news that his father had prostate cancer and was reluctant to enjoy himself too much because it made him feel guilty. They preferred the college student haunts. They were generally cheaper and had more camaraderie than some of the trendier clubs in the city.

That particular night, was karaoke night and as such, with all the theatricality of New York, was jam packed. Quinn didn't mind, but it meant she often got bumped into, especially later on when people had drunk more and coordinated their feet less. There were some occasions at that particular bar, when she would agree to sit in a booth and allow the door staff to stick her chair in the cloakroom out of the way, but not if Rachel was going to drag her to do karaoke, so they had a central table with regular chairs dotted around, more dragged over as the evening wore on and other acquaintances joined them. As had become normal, a number of Rachel and Kurt's friends from NYADA turned up as well as some of the Columbia crowd that Quinn knew.

Kurt was first to go up and look at the menu of songs and decided he and Michael would do a Lady GaGa number together. Quinn accused him of being a little predictable and when he asked for a more radical suggestion, she raised an eyebrow with a reply of "Bruce Springsteen, just for a challenge. I dare you."

Needless to say Kurt went with GaGa and 'Born This Way'. It was a bit of a personal anthem for him after all.

"What are you going to choose?" He handed the list to Rachel, who passed it off to Quinn.

"You choose," the brunette replied with a little smile.

"No way!" Kurt was stunned.

"I think I might faint," Quinn placed a shocked look on her face. "I actually get to choose?" Rachel nodded a little embarrassed that her expertise usually overran most things Quinn suggested. "Definitely no show tunes then," she warned Rachel who made a slight pout of protest. "Let's see, nothing by Barbra Streisand or Liza Minelli. What about Whitney?"

Rachel's face lit up. "How about 'So Emotional?"

"I thought it was my choice," Quinn protested and watched as Rachel's face went all apologetic.

"Of course, sorry."

Quinn looked at her and pointed one out. "What about this?"

Rachel looked at where Quinn's finger pointed and then put her hands together and clapped with a big smile. "Perfect!"

"What did you choose?" Kurt was desperate to know.

"Wait and see," Quinn winked at Rachel.

Kurt was so intrigued, he insisted the girls go first. Rachel went up straight away while Quinn caused carnage trying to get around the chairs dotted all over the place. Eventually they got to the staging area, which was only the height of a large step but with no ramp, a couple of guys lifted Quinn up in her chair. The regular crowd recognized the girls and there were some loud cheers as they began their song.

"Saving All My Love" Kurt knew instantly and told Michael. "They are so gonna have to improvise some of the words if they're singing it to each other!"

"Do you know, ninety percent of the men in this room are green with envy and yet horny as hell with those two up there!"

"Looking around, I'm going to say more like ninety percent of the men and women!" Kurt laughed.

"I still think it's such a shame what happened to Quinn," Michael commented.

Kurt nodded thoughtfully. "You mean her accident?"

"Yeah. She told me when we started in the fall, well actually she told everyone. She's kinda kick-ass."

"Trust me, you have no idea how much less kick-ass she is now that when we started high school. And I don't mean that literally, because obviously she can't kick now, I just mean she's changed a lot."

"I gathered. She told me her nickname once, I forget what it was but it caught me by surprise."

Kurt smiled at him. "HBIC, Hottest Bitch In Cheer!"

"That's right, I remember now. Weird to think of her as bitchy."

"Like I said, you have no idea," Kurt's attention was grabbed as the girls started their song, alternating between them every couple of lines. "You should check out videos on YouTube of her cheering though. She was awesome."

"I will," he replied, turning back to face their friends.


	23. Chapter 23

A/N: Thanks for the feedback again, especially the supportive messages. Not sure what to make of one who said this was the worst fanfic they had ever read. I've read plenty and not being too immodest, but at least I can spell, so how this is the worst I'll never know. Not that this will put me off - I am nothing if not stubborn!

Disclaimer: I do not own Glee (still)

Chapter 23

The following week, Michael sat beside Quinn in class. He hadn't seen her since the weekend, so hadn't had a chance to speak to her about what he had seen. Kurt's suggestion had been a bit of a revelation. It was always the way that when you watched something on YouTube, there were plenty of suggestions for other videos you might like. He had watched Quinn cheerleading in the National Championships as a freshman and sophomore, there were a couple of other videos from what would have been her junior and senior year, but she wasn't in either so then he had followed the trail of links to New Directions performances, most were from their competitions, but then there were some from their weekly classes with Mr Schue. He hadn't seen her star in much, apart from one with a blonde guy where she sang the lead. She had seemed to prefer the background, but that didn't seem to fit with what he knew about her now.

There had been a number of things which she hadn't been in at all and then there was the last video of Quinn performing while she could still walk and he noticed the dedication to her from Kurt who had uploaded the clip. It was strange to see her dancing on her feet through most of them. There were just a couple of clips of her performing in her wheelchair afterwards, one with another guy in a wheelchair and the other when they won at Nationals in Chicago, where she stole the show.

They went to get coffee after class and she thought he was being a little quieter than usual.

"Hey, I forgot to ask how things went with Kurt on Friday night?"

He shrugged. "I don't really know where I stand to be honest. I have tried being direct with him, but I think he's commitment-shy."

Quinn nodded. "He was in a long relationship that didn't end well."

"Blaine," he muttered. "The curse of my life."

Quinn snickered. "A little melodramatic me thinks."

"Says you with the Shakespeare!"

"I'm living the role my good man," she grinned at him. "What's with the quiet today, normally you talk my head off."

He chuckled. "I'm usually good with small-talk, but actually I didn't really know what to say to you about something I saw and how it affected me."

"That sounds ominous."

"No, or maybe, I'm not sure really. I was talking to Kurt on Friday in the bar when you and Rach were singing. I sort of saw you needing a lift onto the little stage and I just sort of commented that it was a shame about your accident."

Quinn had a feeling the conversation was about to get a little emotional. "Thanks for the sentiment I guess, but you know I don't really like sympathy about it."

"I know, I wasn't getting all weepy or anything, it was a bit of a throwaway comment, but he said something about you having changed a lot, for the better by the way. You're not mad we were talking about you are you?"

She shook her head. "I'm sure there are more interesting topics though."

"We weren't exchanging secrets or anything, because we both love you, but I let him know you had told me about how you used to be and your nickname and he said something about watching YouTube to see you cheerleading."

She groaned. "You didn't?"

"I sort of did," he screwed his face up a little embarrassed. "You were really great if that's any consolation."

"I was another person."

"I suppose, but then there were links to videos of your Glee club and I sort of watched those as well. You're all really good, like amazing. I saw Santana sing and couldn't believe how good she is."

"Much better than me," she nodded.

"No, I wouldn't say so, but she was sort of typically Santana. I was just surprised because I have seen you, Rach and Kurt sing but not her. You were really good as well, but just not up front much, not before your accident I guess anyway. You seemed to be in the background most of the time. I was just a bit puzzled as to why really, because you seem much less in the background now. I know that doesn't even make sense by the way."

She laughed at him. "I suppose I was a bit, especially at first. Would you believe me if I said I only joined Glee because I thought Rachel was trying to steal my boyfriend and wanted to keep an eye on them both. Oh, and not forgetting that the cheerleading coach was paranoid about the Glee club stealing funds from the Cheerios so she wanted us to spy on them."

"No way!"

"Yeah, Rachel did sort of steal my boyfriend too. Though technically not until after we broke up, which was all my fault but I would really rather not talk about that. I guess I wasn't really that into it at first. Then they all kind of grew on me and I started to enjoy it more to the point that it was more fun than cheering."

"So how come you and Rachel are so close now if you were sort of enemies back in school?"

Quinn shrugged. "I didn't know anything about being a good human being, Mike. I was a mess and it took me a long time to realize why I was such a bitch. I had a tough time and I fooled everyone because of the way I look. The truth will out eventually and it was Rachel and a couple of others who set me straight and I am grateful for that. The accident changed a lot as well. Rachel was in that car with me and it brought us closer together afterwards. She was really the only one, apart from Artie, who really got it."

"Which one is Artie again?"

"You watched the videos so you must have seen the kid in the chair, sort of square-looking, glasses."

"Oh yeah, there was one of you both performing I'm Still Standing," he rolled his eyes.

Quinn laughed at the memory. "Yeah, he was injured in a car crash when he was eight I think, so he got it as well. What was it you wanted to actually tell me, or are we just making small-talk?" Quinn had lost her train of thought completely.

"I was just a bit puzzled I suppose at how much things had changed for you. I mean, you told us about the accident so I guess I understood that you used to be able to walk, but to actually see it was different. It made me quite emotional."

"You really are totally gay, you know that?"

"You're totally not politically correct," he feigned disgust.

"I'm into girls and in a wheelchair, that makes me more of a minority than you, so I can pretty much get away with saying anything. I was only telling Rach this the other day." She shrugged. Becoming a little more serious she continued. "I still remember doing stuff from before. I remember walking, running and dancing but I have forgotten what it feels like. That's probably a good thing because when I could remember, it hurt a lot to not be able to do them anymore. I guess it's easier now I have forgotten. This is my new normal."

Michael nodded thoughtfully. "I wouldn't have expected to go away to college and find a friend in someone who was in a wheelchair, but it's been really good to get to know you and stuff. I've learned a lot just from hanging out with you."

"Plus you wouldn't have met Kurt if you weren't on my course," she reminded him.

"Do you want me to call Shelby about coming to watch the play?" Rachel called Quinn in the middle of the week.

"I guess, do you have the dates?"

"You already wrote them down for me. Santana said to tell you she can't make any of them, she has to work all those evenings."

"Bummer."

"She's gutted, though not actually admitting it to anyone."

"Maybe she can come to the dress rehearsal instead, I mean if she wants to see it. We are doing the whole show, just without the audience."

"I'll ask. Do you think Shelby will really want to bring Beth, she's a bit young to understand any of it and its pretty late."

"I'm pretty sure she was just joking about that."

"I'll let you know how many tickets we need later then. Kurt can make most of the nights it's on, so we'll just fit around Shelby."

"Just send me a text in the morning, I'm whacked out. Swam a new PB today in the fifty free."

"Really?"

"Yeah, fifty one seconds."

"Wow, two seconds under."

"I know. Feeling pretty pleased with myself."

"You deserve it after all the hard work," Rachel was really proud of her.

"Thanks, I'm missing you though this week."

"I know, but I have to get this assignment finished so I can spend the weekend with you."

"I know. I'm looking forward to spring break now."

"Me too. Get some rest and I'll text you tomorrow. I love you."

"Love you too." Quinn's eyes were about to close, so she ended the call and let herself drift off to sleep.

"Hi Rachel," Shelby answered her cell when her daughter called a few minutes later.

"Hello, Shelby. How are you?"

"Tired but good. This working single mother business is hard."

"I can imagine. I wondered if you still wanted to come and watch Quinn's play. It starts in less than two weeks and we should reserve tickets soon because they are only doing six shows and it will probably sell out quite quickly."

"Absolutely, though I think bringing Beth wouldn't be such a good idea. We tried the cinema last week and that wasn't good. We had to leave about forty minutes in because she couldn't sit still that long and that was for a Disney cartoon."

Rachel chuckled. "I think there is probably a blonde ex-cheerleader who might have been just as restless at her age that I know quite well."

"I think they both only sit still when reading a good book," Shelby noted.

Rachel wondered about solving two issues in one though. Quinn had to know that the play was just too adult for her daughter to watch but would also be disappointed at not seeing her again. "I wonder if I might make a suggestion though. Santana cannot attend the play due to her work schedule and so she and I are going on Saturday to watch the dress rehearsal. Perhaps it might be nice if we took Beth along to that instead. There won't be an audience to disrupt, Quinn would get to see her and you can have a few hours to yourself. Santana loves to play with Beth so I am sure if she gets a bit restless we can entertain her.

"That sounds like a bit of an imposition on you guys, but I confess, I haven't had a Saturday to myself for a long time and I would love to go to the salon. If you don't mind, I think it's a great idea. One of my neighbors and I often take turns to babysit for each other, but that would mean I could impose on her one less time."

"Quinn will be thrilled. Do you have a preferred day of the week to come and watch the play yourself?"

"Thursdays are the best for me, my neighbor is always in then to watch Beth."

"Okay then I'll ask Quinn to get us tickets. I assume you will be happy to sit with Kurt and I?"

"Of course. I might ask one of my friends to come along as well if you don't mind. She's a huge Shakespeare fan but also in the business and it might be an opportunity for some of the performers to impress."

"Just text me in the morning if you want an extra."

"How much are the seats?"

"Only ten dollars for performer's family and friends."

"Then just go ahead and get the extra one anyway. Shall I bring Beth to yours on Saturday, or meet you at the theater?"

"Actually, we are meeting at Quinn's dorm, Broadway Hall. That would be the best place as it's only five minutes' walk to the theater from there."

"Sounds like a good idea, and she can have some time with Beth before you go. I know she will appreciate that."

Rachel and her mother talked a little while longer and then said they're farewells before a very satisfied Rachel went back to her textbook for a couple of hours.

Saturday began early for Rachel and Santana. The Latina was somewhat grumpy having gotten in at two in the morning after work and Rachel's perpetual perkiness drove her a little nuts.

"I really need coffee and I mean good coffee. The place next to Quinn's dorm is best. I think I'm going to need to stop in there before I can cope with your level of excitement this morning." Santana grumbled as they exited the subway station at the University and started walking back down Broadway.

Shelby had arrived there some time before Quinn's friends. She had buzzed the number Rachel had sent and Quinn released the door for her. Surprisingly, Shelby found the blonde waiting for her in the hallway as she came in the building.

"You found it okay then?"

"I had a little difficulty working out which door I was supposed to come through, Rachel told me to go the ramp entrance as it was closest to your room rather than the main door."

"It's easier with the stroller," Quinn pointed the way and offered a hand for Beth to high five. "Hey, Baby Bear," she greeted her daughter with the pet name she had given her just a few weeks before. Shelby paused to give her a hug as well. Rachel and Santana are running a little late."

"That's not like Rachel," Shelby raised an eyebrow, leaning over and releasing Beth's seatbelt. "Go ahead," she indicated for Quinn to take her out. "I'll leave the stroller out here."

"She texted me to say that Santana was late in from work last night and was in need of additional caffeine," she replied. "They'll be here soon though." Beth was instantly on Quinn's lap. "Can I get you anything while we wait?" Quinn pointed for Shelby to follow her and held the door open for her.

"I'm fine thanks, we had breakfast before we left." Shelby glanced around the room. It was personalized in typical student style, some posters, photos stuck around the mirror, but Quinn was also exceptionally neat and tidy. There was nothing on the floor apart from furniture and only her desk seemed to have books and paper scattered over it, and even then, they were in orderly piles. "Your room is a lot tidier than mine was in college."

Quinn grinned. "I get more space than most so no excuse not to keep it tidy. It's also easier for me to get around if I don't leave mess on the floor."

"Of course. Beth is great at picking things up but even so, she can leave things in random places sometimes."

"It's only natural. She's two!" Quinn remembered something then. "Oh that reminds me," she pushed her chair over to the desk and lifted some books out of the way. "I got something for Beth if that's okay," she turned to check that Shelby didn't mind. "It's just a coloring book. I thought if she gets bored today, she'll have something to do."

"It's fine, Quinn, but I did put a few things in the stroller for her anyway."

"I figured you would, but I just wanted to get her something." She turned back to Beth. "Here you go, Baby B. This is for you." She presented Beth with the coloring book.

Beth's face broke into a big smile as she recognized what it was. "Goldilock!" she pointed her little chubby finger at the picture on the cover.

"Yeah, and look inside. There are lots of pictures to color in, see here's Cinderella as well." Quinn handed her a box of crayons and opened it for Beth to use. The little girl took a yellow one and went straight to work on Cinderella's hair.

"Thank you for getting that. She loves drawing and coloring." Shelby looked at her watch. "I can stick around if you want until Rachel and Santana get here, but I'm happy to leave you with her if you don't mind." The older woman surprised herself with that decision. Something about it just felt right.

Quinn looked around with a quizzical expression. "Why would I mind? I'm just surprised that you would trust me after what I did last year and you know…" she pointed at her chair.

"A lot has changed in a year and as for 'you know', I don't see how it's a problem." Shelby moved closer and crouched to give Beth a kiss goodbye. "Momma's going to go get a haircut, sweetie. You be a good girl for Quinn, okay?"

Beth nodded.

"You have my cell if you need anything or there is a problem. I'll text Rachel to let her know when I am on my way back and I can pick her up from here or the theater, whichever."

"Okay, enjoy yourself. We'll take good care of her." Quinn gave Shelby a thankful smile. "Wave bye bye to Momma, Baby B."

Beth waved at her mother as she went out the door.

Shelby bumped into Rachel and Santana as they arrived at the front of the building and Shelby walked down the ramp.

"Hey girls," she waved and then went to give them both a squeeze.

"Hi, are you leaving already?" Rachel asked.

"Yeah, Beth's inside with Quinn. They are having a little quality time with a coloring book."

"That was totally my idea," Santana waved her coffee cup around.

"Have you woken up yet?" Shelby asked the taller girl. "Quinn said you hadn't had much sleep."

"I'm all good now I gots my coffee. I'm going to head in, see you in a few Rach." Santana pretty much ran up the slope and gave Rachel a couple of minutes with her mother.

"I'm surprised you left before we got here."

Shelby eyed her daughter. "I am a bit as well, but I can't deny there's a bond between them and despite her injury, Quinn is more than capable of looking after Beth. I wanted to show her that I trust her now."

"Thank you. That means so much. I know a lot of the time it doesn't get to her, you know, being a paraplegic, but she still lacks a sense of self-worth. The bad days are few and far between now thank goodness, but she still has her moments and I know it's this sort of thing which stops her feeling sorry for herself."

Shelby nodded. "She's very lucky to have you and other good friends who have stood by her."

"We're lucky to have her as well," Rachel commented. "She brings light into people's lives. She brings it into mine."

Shelby smiled knowingly. "I have left some food for Beth in the bottom of the stroller and there's a bag of toys in there as well. She'll ask for something to eat when she's hungry. There is a change bag as well."

"We'll be fine. Santana is going to be made to deal with the diapers for getting up in a bad mood."

"I'll let you tell her that!"

"I already have!" Rachel and Shelby laughed.

Santana rapped on the door to Quinn's room. She heard Quinn talking to Beth on the other side.

"Shall we go and see who's at the door?" There was the sound of wheels rolling closer and the door opened.

"Tana!" Beth's face lit up.

"Hey, Squirt."

Quinn rolled her eyes as her gregarious friend lifted the toddler from her lap and swung her up into a cuddle. Quinn backed up and let them in.

"I was hoping to see you in your costume. I'd love to see everyone's face with you wheeling down the road in an Elizabethan dress."

"You have perked up, obviously."

"Had _a lot_ of coffee!"

"Where's mine?"

"It's bad for you."

"Really, San? Who are you my mother?"

"No, I care more about your welfare than she does and I was reading this book that Rach got from the library and it said cr … paraplegics should avoid coffee."

"Give me strength," Quinn looked skyward.

"That's my plan," Santana grinned at her. "Drink this instead," she held out a bottle of vitamin water. "You need to be kind to your voice today."

"What book have you been reading?"

"Can't remember what it's called, really medical sounding. Rach got a bunch from the library, I told you."

"What was it about?"

"Just stuff about spinal cord injuries and so I thought I would give it a read as well."

"Why did she do that?"

"Dunno, ask her. It was alright actually. I'm glad I read it 'cause I feel like I understand more about it now."

"Like what?"

"Like why you need to avoid too much caffeine and booze. Why you don't need to eat as much now, which I was worried about because your legs got all skinny and then it said that was natural because your muscles don't get used so they like shrink and sh…" Santana caught herself before saying shit in front of Beth. "And why you have to get all the creases out of your clothes, all that sort of stuff that can affect your health."

"But I already know all this stuff, I don't see why you and Rach need to read up on it."

"Chill, Q. Most people would be glad their friends are trying to understand them better."

"You're not trying to understand me though are you? My accident doesn't define me and it's not going to ruin my life. How about we stick to the previous method of just asking me things?"

"Because we feel awkward about it sometimes. It's not easy to get you sometimes, you're not the most vocal when it comes to telling us about problems and we just wanted to know what to watch out for so we can support you. It's not a crime to care about someone you know."

Quinn huffed. She had felt really great that Shelby trusted her alone with Beth, even if it was for just a few minutes, but now she felt a bit like a child again, with Rachel and Santana acting like they were her parents.

Rachel arrived shortly after to find Quinn with a bit of a scowl and Santana looking a little like she had run over the neighbor's cat.

"What did you do?" She asked the taller girl.

"I swear I didn't do anything." Santana concentrated on entertaining Beth while Rachel approached her girlfriend for a kiss.

"What's with the face?" Rachel asked.

"I am acting like a child because I think I am being treated a bit like one."

"Did she use the 'C' word again?"

"Don't blame San, it's you as well."

Rachel looked bemused. "What have done?"

"Santana told me all about your research project into spinal cord injuries." Quinn looked irritated.

Rachel turned to Santana, who in turn shrugged a little helplessly, not really understanding why it was such a big deal.

Turning back to her girlfriend, Rachel asked her why she was upset with them.

"I feel like you should just ask me stuff about my disability, not go behind my back to find things out."

"Is that what you think this was?" Rachel didn't understand why Quinn was upset, but indulged her anyway.

"Well, why else would you take out library books about it?"

"Did it occur to you to that we might just want to understand things better so we don't make life difficult for you or get ourselves in an awkward situation where we offend you or anyone else for that matter because we were uneducated?"

"No, I guess not. It's just hard; you feel a bit violated when more control is taken away from you."

"How are we taking control away from you?" Rachel sighed a little. "Do you know how uncomfortable we feel asking you for information sometimes. You are never the most forthcoming person and it's easy to overlook your disability because you seem so okay about it now and you don't complain. But that's also doing you a disservice, because it is something that we should consider. It's part of your life and we love you, so it's also part of our lives as well."

Quinn's heart melted a little after Rachel's little speech. Hell Santana's heart skipped a beat as well.

"Am I really that difficult to talk to?" Quinn looked from one to the other.

Rachel shook her head. "No, in fact talking to you is easy these days. It's just that you keep problems to yourself sometimes and then they spill over and get out of control. I borrowed the book because I wanted to know how paraplegia affects people over time. I wanted to understand how to be supportive without treating you like a child. My intention was exactly the opposite of what you felt we were doing. I don't want you to feel as though I am trying to mother you. You're my girlfriend and that's what I want us to have, a partnership. In order to do that relationship justice, I just felt that there were gaps in my knowledge that needed to be filled without the need to make you feel awkward, when I know it must feel that way sometimes."

"Santana said you read a bunch of books about it," Quinn was less upset now.

"Four actually, but two were personal accounts and one was a novel. I read those to see if you might like them. Sometimes we can find other people's achievements inspiring."

Quinn looked down, a bit ashamed that she had overreacted. "Sorry if I went off the deep end. Guess I got the wrong end of the stick."

Santana came over and dropped Beth back in her lap. "No worries, Q. I literally would have murdered someone by now if I had been in your position."

Quinn kissed the top of Beth's head. "This wasn't the start to the day I had anticipated. I'm really sorry Rach." She squeezed her lover's hand and felt it grip her back.

"Forget it. Shall we get going or you are going to be late for your rehearsal."

"Sure, ready to go Baby Bear?"

Beth nodded. Quinn held the toddler's arms while she slid to the footrest on the wheelchair and then onto the floor. Santana took Beth's hand and escorted her to the stroller parked outside. Rachel looked at her girlfriend who stared back briefly with a guilty expression. She just couldn't resist the urge to lean over and give her a kiss, if for no other reason than reassuring her that everything was alright. Their lips met and they held each other briefly.

Pulling away moments later, Quinn nodded at the door. "Come on, let's roll."

They made their way along the street a couple of blocks to the theater and went in the public entrance instead of going up onto campus first. Quinn went ahead and showed them to the auditorium and then vanished off to get into costume.

Rachel sat and talked to Santana and they both played with Beth for a while, then Juan appeared with copious notes and a script which distracted the shorter brunette. Meanwhile, backstage Quinn had a couple of other female cast members help her into the dress. It was plain white, fitted around her breasts, but simple in design and flowed down over her hips to just below her knees. She wore simple gold sandals on her feet and then went off to get her hair and make-up done at the mirror. Her hair was collar length and given ringlets for the part, which suited her, and a light covering of foundation and blusher with a touch of dark pink lip gloss was all she needed.

As she rolled out to the warm up area, appreciative glances came her way. She had been well wrapped up in winter clothes for much of the time the others had known her and now she dressed for summer, her look feminine and willowy, the boys at least gave her longing looks and wishing she were straight.

Quinn could feel it as well. The nerves were palpable, three of the most important people in her world were on the other side of the curtain and she was praying everything would go well. Marcus approached and gave her a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek as he always did. He was dressed in a soldier's uniform.

"Ready milady?" He held out an arm for her to hook onto.

"As I'll ever be," she replied with an enigmatic smile.

They heard the music which started the performance go up and took their places on stage. The backstage lights went off, leaving Quinn and the other characters in the opening scene alone as the curtain rose and Leonato's first words began as the stage lights went on.

Beth chattered a little to Santana who watched the play studiously, even though Shakespeare wasn't one of her favorite authors. It was light hearted, which surprised her and Quinn's delivery as always was superb. It was definitely the voice. Every line, much of it witty, some of it dripping with sarcasm, was perfectly timed and toned. Quinn had forgotten who was watching for the most part and just immersed herself in the performance.

Beth looked up and watched, but clearly didn't understand any of it. She smiled whenever Quinn came on stage and pointed out "Kin" to Santana, who nodded and grinned at the little girl who sat on her lap for the most part, coloring her book and playing with a doll.

Rachel and Juan sat under a lamp towards the back of the stalls, checking through the lighting and staging plan. Rachel made a few thoughtful observations, but for the most part, she thought it was really well staged and lit. The acting was exceptionally good and the theater group's reputation for putting on a good show was certainly only going to be enhanced by what she had seen and that was without her biased opinion of Quinn.

Rachel hadn't known Quinn was that good. Simply, she was amazing. Her confidence, which often seemed to desert her real self, never wavered as Beatrice. Her comic timing was brilliant and there was no doubt that Quinn and Marcus were the glue that held the show together.

As they delivered the final scene, Rachel was thrilled with the way the dramatic lighting helped to pick out the lovers of the piece as they delivered their lines. Thinking back to her last role in a major production, West Side Story, Rachel felt guilty that she hadn't encouraged Quinn to take on a main part; she would have smashed it and let everyone else see just how good she was. But Quinn at that time had been in another place entirely and wasn't the same person she saw in front of her taking a bow to the tiny audience.

Santana was on her feet, with Beth up on her shoulder and waving arms in the air cheering wildly. Beth was half-cheering and half-laughing at the Latin girl. Rachel and Juan both applauded and walked to the front where Quinn blushed at the reaction of her friends. There were high-fives all round amongst the cast after they broke formation and excited chatter for the opening night four days away. Quinn finished the brief celebration and rolled right up to the front of the stage, where Santana was waiting for her.

"Awesome, Q." Santana dropped Beth down from her shoulders and found the toddler wanted to go to Quinn, so she stood her on the edge of the stage so she could climb up into the blonde's lap.

"Baby Bear, did you like my play?"

Beth was just happy to be with Quinn and so she giggled as Quinn tickled her ribs and blew a raspberry on her forehead.

"Kin, silly."

"I know, I like being silly with you though."

Quinn handed her back to her Latin friend and went to get changed. On the way back, Quinn shouted from the stage that she was ready and would meet them by the exit.

"So how was it overall?" Quinn rolled out to get a hug from her girlfriend.

"You were incredible. I loved it. I could watch it over and over again."

"Good because you are going to have to on Thursday."

Santana wanted to add her thought. "I didn't expect to understand it so easily, Shakespeare is normally a bit confusing, but it was really light-hearted for the most part and I loved it. Very funny. Kudos!" She held out a fist and they bumped them together in celebration.

"I am so relieved I cannot tell you. This has given me sleepless night before now."

"If I enjoyed it, everyone else is going to love it, Q."

The happy little group decided to take a walk for a while and headed straight over the cross-walk outside the theater and down 116th St to Riverside Park. Quinn immediately sent Shelby a text message to let her know where they were going in case she arrived back at the theater or her dorm room and they were nowhere to be found. She got a quick reply back to let her know it was fine and she had met a friend for lunch so would take her time.

"Shelby said it was fine," she let the other two know.

"North or south?" Rachel asked.

"South," Quinn replied. She knew the park better than either of her friends. "We can wander down past the tennis courts to the playground. I think some of my classmates said they were having a game today actually."

Sure enough as they approached the courts, the sound of racket on ball could be heard. There were several of her fellow students out playing and getting ready for the tennis season ahead. They sat on a bench for a while watching the games, but Beth was soon disinterested, so they set off walking again. They passed a skate park and Beth was much more interested in the teenagers who were up and down the ramps and quarter pipes on BMX bikes, inline skates and skateboards. A little further down there was a soccer game going on and finally they reached the playground.

Santana immediately took Beth over to the baby climbing frame and held onto her as she picked her way up a few bars, but the other things there were a little too big for her. There was a small roundabout though and Santana held Beth on while Quinn spun them around slowly. Beth was pretty happy, then got dizzy and wanted to get off. Once she had recovered a little, she grinned and said, "again!" The three of them laughed as the same thing happened again. Rachel meanwhile just watched and enjoyed the normality of it all, taking out her phone and snapping some pictures. The first person she messaged the best one to was Shelby, then Quinn and Santana, and finally she sent it to Puck.

Beth toddled around quite happily for a while, generally being chased by Santana, who Quinn thought would probably make an amazing parent. In her head, she decided that if ever she had another child, her own or adopted, she would ask Santana to be Godparent. Eventually Beth made her way back to Quinn who sat next to the bench that Rachel was perched on. Fortunately she had the brakes on her chair because Beth went behind and grabbed the horizontal bar at the back of her wheelchair and tried to push it while shouting 'troller'.

Quinn laughed again. She didn't know how to explain to Beth what it was, but Santana had other ideas. She grabbed Beth and brought her from behind the chair.

"Okay, Squirt." Santana pointed at Beth's stroller. "This is your stroller," Santana held the little girl's attention. "Say stroller."

"Troller!"

Santana rolled her eyes and then pointed at Quinn's chair. "This is a wheelchair, can you say wheelchair?"

What came from Beth's mouth was not entirely correct but phonologically similar. "Eeechair!" Beth was really trying but 'w' sounds were hard for toddlers.

"That's right. This is Beth's stroller," San pointed out once more "and this is Quinn's wheelchair."

"Kin, eeechair."

"Good girl," San looked pleased with herself. She had no idea if Beth understood the difference, but at least they had established the correct name. "What's that over there?" She pointed out an ice cream van parked at the edge of the playground.

"I-cream," Beth had no difficulty with that one.

"Come on, Squirt. Let's get some ice cream."

Beth clapped she was so happy. Rachel and Quinn looked quite pleased at the suggestion as well.

Shelby looked down at her phone as she walked north along Broadway. She had received a number of picture messages from her daughter throughout the early afternoon and another had just come through. She had sent her one of Quinn in costume on stage, then there was quite a long gap before the next one had Quinn pushing Beth on a roundabout and Santana looking a little green trying to hold the toddler on. Another one had followed shortly after of Santana swinging Beth upside down from her ankles and Beth laughing her head off. The last one that had just arrived was instantly made into Shelby's wallpaper on her phone. It was a picture of Rachel and Quinn either side of Beth and all three with a blob of ice cream on their noses. She assumed Santana took the picture on Rachel's phone. It was such a lovely picture of the three of them, Shelby actually felt her heartstrings tug. A final text came through from Quinn to say they had arrived back at her dorm room and they would be waiting for her when she got back.

Shelby was only about twenty minutes behind them when she arrived at the door and buzzed to be let in. Rachel actually came to meet her and took her up to the kitchen rather than Quinn's room. Beth was sat on Quinn's lap having a drink of juice while Quinn had tea and Santana had takeaway coffee.

"Hey, Babygirl." Shelby greeted her adopted daughter and scooped her up from Quinn's lap as Beth put her arms out.

"Momma!"

"Have you been a good girl?"

The curly blonde head bobbed up and down as Shelby glanced at the others for confirmation.

"Absolute angel," Santana confirmed. "We had a great time didn't we, Squirt? Nice haircut too," the Latina nodded.

Beth giggled. "Tana!" She wriggled in her mother's arms a sure sign that she wanted to get down, so Shelby dropped her down to the floor.

"We had a great time," Quinn confirmed. "She was really well-behaved during the rehearsal and just sat and colored in her book, then we went over to the park and had some fun at the playground."

"I saw the pictures, Rachel has been sending them to me all afternoon." Shelby laughed. "I love the one with the ice cream."

"You don't mind that we gave Beth ice cream do you. We figured not because she knew what it was straight away and pointed out what she wanted."

"Of course not. What's childhood without ice cream?"

"Or adulthood for that matter," Rachel commented.

Beth was listening to the conversation and was stood next to Quinn with her hand on Quinn's knee, which was just the right height for her to rest her arm on. Shelby moved around and pulled out the chair which was next to where Beth stood.

Having learned a new word, Beth was keen to share it with Shelby. "Momma, Kin eeechair," she pointed correctly at her birth mother who gave her hair a ruffle.

"Well-remembered Baby B," Quinn smiled. "Santana decided to go all politically correct this afternoon and taught her how to say it, but I think 'w's are as hard as 's's, and 'l's are virtually impossible if you are two and a half."

Shelby gave Beth a clap. "Clever girl."

"Did you have a nice day as well?" Quinn asked Shelby.

"I did. It was nice not to have to rush around for once on a Saturday. I shared a nice lunch with my friend, Monica who is going to come and watch the play with me on Thursday and I decided to tell her all about you guys, because she asked where Beth was."

"Only the good things I hope?" Quinn asked and Shelby smiled back reassuringly.

"Only the good stuff!"


	24. Chapter 24

A/N: So here goes the big performance.

Thanks again for the feedback, much appreciated:)

Disclaimer: Glee does not belong to me

Chapter 24

Opening night was a success, though they had all been a little nervous, including a certain brunette in the audience who was praying no one, but especially Quinn, would forget their lines with an almost full house. Quinn didn't forget hers, though she had to prompt the guy playing Leonato a couple of times.

Rachel was back again the second night with Kurt, Shelby and her friend Monica, whose son went to the pre-school. Monica worked as an agent for a number of theater performers and was delighted to be meeting Rachel.

After a drink at the bar, they took their seats and waited for the opening act to begin.

"I hope it goes well," Kurt was sitting with his fingers crossed and tapping his foot nervously on the floor.

"I think they'll be fine, they were nervous yesterday but it went well. The second night is always better." Rachel had every confidence.

"I read the review online in the student newspaper and it seems to have been well received," Shelby gave Kurt a reassuring smiled.

"They got a standing ovation," Rachel nodded.

Monica was optimistic about the production. Student plays were often good at introducing new performers and there were fewer egos surrounding them. Shelby had told her about Quinn, but had kept it to a minimum and the agent was intrigued as to why Shelby hadn't been as forthcoming about her as she had about Rachel.

"I love this play, it really does have some of Shakespeare's best characters." She looked through the program and saw the headshot of the leading cast. "Quinn is very pretty, has she done any modeling?"

Rachel looked at her quizzically. "Modeling?"

"Well, yes. She must have thought about it surely? She's very attractive."

The penny dropped. Shelby hadn't told Monica about Quinn's disability. She was just looking at her face.

"Err, not really. She was pretty focused on other things in high school." Rachel looked at Shelby who just gave her an enigmatic smile. Shelby obviously didn't want Monica to know ahead of the play.

The lights went down and the introductions were made. Rachel had a small grin across her lips and she wished she had been able to tell Quinn about Monica. She was so distracted by the agent being oblivious that she wasn't actually watching as the characters in the opening scene walked across the stage. Leonato, Hero and Beatrice strolled across to meet the messenger and Rachel stole a glance across at Monica as the older woman realized Quinn was a paraplegic. She almost laughed out loud as the other woman's jaw went slack and she glanced down at the program to check if it was right.

"You are sneaky, Shelby. You could have told me." Rachel heard Monica whisper to her friend.

"It was funnier watching your face as you realized."

"Now I know why Rachel was so surprised when I mentioned about her modeling. I'm so embarrassed."

"Don't be, Quinn will think it's funny."

"You can't tell her."

"Why not? Honestly, she'll think it's a hoot."

Quinn thought it was very funny when met up with them in the bar later. "Shelby, that was a bit mean."

"I just didn't want her to have any pre-conceived ideas about anything." The tall brunette had a wry smile across her face. "You could have had them use a full picture in the brochure if you wanted to broadcast it."

Quinn shrugged. "I guess. Do you think I should have?" she wondered momentarily.

Monica had gotten over her embarrassment pretty quickly and was now more thoughtful. "No I think Shelby's right. If I had known, I would have come with the pre-conceived idea that maybe it was a bit of a publicity stunt or even just the other students being charitable, but after the initial surprise, I was just thinking about your performance."

Quinn sort of gulped and decided to just ask her what she thought. "And how was it?" She scrunched her face up in preparation for some criticism.

"Well, for a student production I thought it was one of the best one's I've seen. The staging wasn't the best, but the performances were smooth and seemed very natural, so you have obviously worked hard in rehearsal. For you individually, I would say you sound amazing. Your voice, and by that I mean the tone, diction and projection, is really very good for someone with such limited experience. When you weren't moving around, I also found your performance quite captivating, you do hold everyone's attention, and I don't just mean because you are in a wheelchair either, your understanding of the humor and comic timing were fantastic, you get it and that is clear to anyone who understands Shakespeare."

"I sense a but," Quinn mumbled.

Monica didn't want to upset the girl, but already had a sense that she preferred someone giving it to her straight. "Not a but, how about we just call it feedback?"

"Feedback I can handle."

"You need to think about the times you are moving around. Maybe it's the director who should have understood this better, but if you speak and …" she fished for the correct term, "… roll, I guess, your voice tends to drift and carries less weight as a result. Does that make sense? I don't mean that you should just be sitting still though. You need some practice at speaking and moving at the same time and yet staying connected to the audience when you do."

"I guess. It's hard because I don't really know what I'm doing and to be honest, neither does Juan, our director. He said himself we were just sort of figuring things out as we go."

"I think you just need to avoid whizzing around the stage so much," Kurt interjected. "It's like me running from side to side, you go too quick, but I loved the last scene with the lights."

"Rachel's idea," Quinn nodded and gave her a smile.

"I hadn't even noticed about the moving around thing last night, I was sort of concentrating on everyone getting their lines right," Rachel added her comments. "But the last scene did work well and if you think about it, that's probably because when you move, the stage is dark and then you pause when the spot goes on to deliver the lines."

Quinn nodded. "That's really helpful. Thanks for giving me some useful feedback. I think everyone else would just pat me on the head and say well done, isn't she brave!" she grinned. "So you think I should just slow down as I deliver the lines?"

"That would be a good start and I just want to say again, considering you haven't really done a great deal of acting, you're a natural." Monica announced.

Kurt raised an eyebrow. "Drama queen!"

"Takes one to know one," Quinn fired back at him. "So essentially, you all liked it, but we need a bit of polish?"

"I would say that's a little harsh," Shelby tilted her head slightly. "It was an enjoyable evening and I thought the acting was great. To be honest, I've paid a lot more to see much worse, so you should be really pleased. I doubt the audience will be asking for their money back."

"That's a relief. I enjoyed it more tonight than last night where it was nerve racking and everyone was a bit tense, so we were just relieved to get our lines out." Quinn was pleased with the response. She hadn't expected they would get such good feedback; reviews were often slating and so far they hadn't had that from anyone. "I'm going to see if we can't make some changes before we go on tomorrow. Rach, can you help me tonight when we get in?"

"No, we are going to sleep or you will make yourself ill with exhaustion. Practice tomorrow instead."

Quinn grumbled, but acquiesced. "Yes, Mom."

There was a brief pause in conversation whilst Quinn's friends from her dorm invaded the bar en mass.

"Oh my God, Quinn. You were awesome," Mel was gushing as she approached their table.

Turning to look over her shoulder with a grin, Quinn raised an eyebrow. "If you pat me on the head now I'm leaving," Mel laughed and the blonde found her friend's arms wrapped around her, which made her fall into laughter herself.

"We totally videoed the whole thing on Joolz' phone and we're gonna post it to YouTube, that is if you don't mind?" Carmen announced.

"Why would I care? There's like a bazillion clips of me anyway, according to Michael." She turned to look at Kurt who pretended there was a bit of fluff on his trousers requiring his complete concentration.

"Whilst I might have directed him to have a look at your old Cheerleading videos, I did not encourage him to trawl through looking for every reference of your past life."

"You were the one responsible for posting most of those Glee Club videos."

"Rachel made me!" He defended himself against the Quinn's glare, which was still scary enough to put fear in his belly.

"Wait a minute," Julia chimed in. "There are videos? Of you guys singing, dancing and cheerleading?"

Quinn groaned.

Rachel couldn't resist. "There are lots of videos of us performing some of our most notable performances…" she was about to start telling them all about them when Quinn put a hand on her knee.

"Rach," a look passed from the sparkling hazel to rich chocolate eyes. It was rather endearing and protective of Quinn who had been helping her girlfriend with her habit of talking too much, particularly about herself. Rachel didn't need anything other than the look to understand that if any of them were interested, they could look for themselves.

Shelby noticed and thought it was about the cutest thing she had ever seen. "We are going to make a move, guys. It was lovely to see you all and thanks for the invite. Let us know next time you are appearing, I'd love to come and watch again."

Rachel jumped up. "I'll come to the door with you."

Monica gave Quinn a quick hug and congratulations before Shelby gave her kiss on the cheek and promised to be in touch soon. They left with Rachel for the main entrance.

"Who are they?" Carmen asked, noticing the age gap was probably too great for them to be college friends.

"The tall one is Rachel's birth mother, Shelby."

"Wow. Heavy, they do look really alike now you mention it," Carmen was thoughtful. "So she was adopted?"

Quinn was a little concerned that she could be skating on thin ice. "Yeah, as a baby. She was a Sophomore before they met for the first time." She caught Kurt's eye and wondered if she should say more. He gave her a nervous smile as if to say it's okay to tell them.

"Does she know you're an item? She seemed pretty affectionate towards you."

"Yeah, she knows." Quinn looked back at Kurt again for reassurance.

"Just tell them, they're friends, aaarrgh." He got frustrated with Quinn sometimes because she was so hard to convince that people wouldn't hate her for just being herself, warts and all.

"Ladies, you will have to forgive our Miss Fabray here. Her parents scarred her as a child and now she finds it virtually impossible to tell people anything personal about her past life. She thinks that you will dislike her for a mistake she made a couple of years ago and so she hasn't been able to bring herself to tell you." Kurt stood and then unashamedly stepped over to Quinn and sat on her lap, wrapping his arms around her and giving her a hug.

The other girls looked a little surprised, but it was Quinn who was struck dumb by Kurt's revealing all. She had a few tears running down her cheek and tried to collect herself, but in truth she wanted to be honest with the people she liked and he had just given her an opportunity.

"When I was a Sophomore, I went to a party and started talking to one of the football players from school. He was really charming and a bit of a bad boy. He got me really drunk on wine coolers. We ended up making out and the next thing I knew … " she took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. "I was pregnant."

"No way!" Carmen looked blown away.

Quinn felt her cheeks flush. "I was completely messed up because I already had a boyfriend and a bunch of messy stuff happened that meant I was in no position to keep the baby after she was born. It just so happened that Shelby was around at the time and when I was in the hospital she came and spoke to me saying that she regretted giving Rachel up for adoption but she had no means of bringing up a child alone when she was younger and felt she was doing what was best for her. Rachel was adopted by a gay couple and her dad's adore her. They did such an awesome job. I felt that I was too young and didn't have my parents on side – my Dad kicked me out when he found out I was pregnant, so when Shelby asked if she could have a second chance at being a parent and adopt Beth, I let her. I figured that she would make a great Mom."

"Oh my God, Quinn. How are you even sane?" Mel was horrified.

"I wasn't for a while after. I pretended I was though, even to myself, for about a year and then things started to come crashing down."

"What happened?"

Quinn felt Kurt's grip tighten around her.

"I sort of went into meltdown. Quit everything, skipped classes, took up with some terrible acquaintances, abandoned my real friends and decided I wanted Beth back. I did some terrible things but eventually Rachel realized what I was doing and saved me from myself. She let me know that it was better for Beth to have someone stable as a parent and I was far from that. I hadn't done much in my life before that was unselfish. I thought I had blown it with Shelby though, she left town and I didn't think I would see Beth again."

"So how come you're both okay with each other now?"

Quinn looked down at where Kurt's hand was holding hers and she gave a sad smile. "I changed a lot and then the accident happened." She went quiet for a moment. "Rachel was in the accident as well, you know. She doesn't say much about it because she still feels guilty that she made a complete recovery and I didn't."

The others looked at each other and as she scanned their faces, she saw surprise and sadness but no one seemed to be disgusted at her for what she had done.

"We never even told Shelby, she and Rachel aren't really that close. They get on, but I guess Shelby knows that she can never really be a mother to her, she's more like a big sister I guess. In the chaos that followed the accident, Shelby got left out of the loop and then Santana met her by chance one afternoon in Central Park with Beth and the schemer that she is, invited her over to Rachel's that evening."

Kurt started laughing at the memory of Rachel's plans going up in smoke.

Quinn started smiling. "So Shelby rocks up and finds Rachel there, explains what happened with San and then I roll out of the bedroom and come face to face with her. I see Beth and freak, Shelby sees the wheelchair and freaks, Rachel is the only rational one there and she's panicking because her plans for a nice quiet evening for the two of us have just been interrupted. Shelby has no idea what happened to us and walks in without warning the evening before the one year anniversary of the accident, so I am already a bit of a basket case. You couldn't make this shit up!" She paused briefly. "Rach gets Shelby to stay awhile and then tries to get me to come out and speak to her as I was having a meltdown and eventually we end up having a complete heart-to-heart, telling her everything that had happened. The upshot was that I got to see Beth and we formed an amicable relationship. Since then she's warmed to me I think, realizing that I don't want to try and steal my daughter back has helped."

She and Kurt giggled a little, because they knew the whole story about that. "Shit, Quinn. Your life is a freaking soap opera."

"You made me tell them!"

"But don't you feel better now?"

Quinn nodded. She actually did feel better now that everything was out there. She looked at the other three girls. "Do you want to see a picture of her?" She took out her phone and showed her the photos she had saved from the previous weekend.

"Oh God, she's gorgeous and totally looks like you, but with curly hair," Carmen noted.

Kurt raised an eyebrow. "If you knew the father, you would know what a blessing that is. Oww!" He winced as Quinn dug her elbow in his ribs.

"Puck's a good guy. He's not my type, but he's not the jerk he used to be when he got me pregnant."

"I guess." Kurt agreed with her on that score.

Quinn turned to look at the others. "Sorry I didn't say anything before. I'm not very comfortable talking about it to be honest."

"It's fine, we get it." Carmen looked at her. "Did you think that we would run a mile if we found out?"

"No, not really. I figured the chair is enough to put most people off and you guys didn't seem to mind that too much. I suppose I just don't really like the idea that I screwed up."

"But you didn't really screw up, I mean you did the right thing and she's the cutest thing ever. I bet she makes Shelby really happy and that's an amazing thing to give to someone else."

"I love you guys, you know that right?" Quinn was pretty emotional about their reaction.

"We know," Julia was looking at the pictures now. "Oh my God, Santana has her strung up by the ankles."

"Beth loves her. She just kind of throws her around all over the place and Beth just giggles the whole time."

"How come she's not here tonight?" Julia wondered. Santana was really protective of Quinn and she was surprised not to see her for the play.

"She has to work. She can't make any of the performances, but she came to the dress rehearsal so she's seen it."

"That's such a shame. She works a lot."

Quinn noticed the comments and wondered if Julia liked Santana more than she had let on. They had met a number of times, usually when Santana slept over and they had breakfast together the following morning.

"She's trying not to eat into her college fund before next year."

"Where is she going to go?"

"Not sure yet, she applied here and NYU. I always thought she would go west coast, but she surprised me." Quinn turned to Kurt. "Any chance you could sit on someone else for a while, people are staring and my legs have gone to sleep."

He turned to look at her deadpan, rolled his eyes and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "You are incorrigible," he said and then they both started laughing.

Meanwhile Rachel was outside with her mother and Monica.

"Thanks for coming, Quinn really appreciated it."

"I wasn't lying when I said I really enjoyed it."

"I know, but …" she shrugged. "I guess we are still getting to know each other properly and it's great to know we have your support."

"Always," Shelby squeezed her arm. "And I'm looking forward to your Summer Showcase. Quinn said you were performing next month."

"Yes and I think I am going to try some auditions as well. You know there are plans for Funny Girl return to Broadway and I would love to just try out for it even though I wouldn't stand a chance of getting in."

"I heard and you should definitely try. You are amazing, Rachel. And so is Quinn."

"I agree," Monica interjected. "It's not going to be easy for her to get parts in this town, but she definitely has something special."

"Thank you for saying that. We keep trying to convince her, but she is afraid no one will give her a chance once they see the chair." Rachel just wanted everyone to see beyond it the way she did.

Shelby gave her daughter a hug. "Don't worry about her. I think she's much stronger than any of realize."

Rachel nodded thoughtfully. "Why did you leave her alone with Beth last week? I remember you saying that you weren't comfortable with that when you first found out about the accident."

"I don't honestly know. I guess it's the cumulative factor. She seems to just be able to figure out a way to do everything and I wasn't expecting that when I first saw her in the chair. I thought that she would need help with lots of things, but then I saw her lift Beth and had her climb into her lap and then even get in and out of the chair on her own. I guess I realized that I had been wrong in my assumptions."

"I just wondered," Rachel sighed. "I'm glad you did though. It pretty much meant the world to her. She probably didn't say it but then this is Quinn; she doesn't always say much about her feelings." Rachel chuckled.

"I know, but I get the feeling that she has grown a lot as a human being. I can't help thinking about how awful that accident must have been, but she really is someone to admire now and maybe that's as a result of what happened to the both of you."

Rachel nodded. "Thanks, Shelby. Perhaps you and Beth could come over for Sunday lunch again before we go on Spring Break?"

"Let me know when and we'll be there."

"I will. And nice to meet you Monica, thanks for coming."

"Thanks for the invite. It was refreshing to meet the both of you and Kurt. You can always count on some constructive feedback if you need it. Let Shelby know the next time any of you perform and I'll make it if I can."

Shelby hailed a cab and gave Rachel a quick hug before disappearing into the back of it with Monica.

Wandering back inside, Rachel returned to see Kurt sliding from Quinn's lap and going to the bar giggling as he went. "What did I miss?"

Quinn looked round to see her girlfriend approaching. "I just kicked Kurt out of your seat."

"So I see."

"He was just comforting me in your absence," Quinn assured her. "He kind of persuaded me to tell Mel, Carmen and Joolz about Beth."

Rachel was stunned. Quinn rarely wanted to talk about Beth, so this was a turn up. She saw Julia hand Quinn her phone back.

"I was just showing them the photos from the park last week."

Rachel didn't really know what to say. "I'm glad, but also a bit surprised."

"I hope you don't mind, but they asked about Shelby so I explained and I guess it didn't make much sense to leave Beth out of the story."

"Why would I mind?" Rachel never minded being open with the truth.

Quinn shrugged.

"Are you okay now that everything is out in the open?" Rachel put her arms around her from behind and placed her chin on Quinn's shoulder.

"Yeah, I think so."

Rachel stayed where she was but looked up at the others. "Are you guys okay? I mean, it's a bit of a shocker isn't it?"

Mel just nodded.

Carmen grinned. "I can't believe you used to be straight."

Quinn and Rachel laughed at that. "If only you knew," Quinn's eyes watered as she laughed. "Would it shock you if I said me and Rach spent two years of high school fighting over the same boy?"

"No freaking way!"

"Yeah and worse still, Rach was supposed to marry him the day we got in the car accident."

"My brain is going to explode," Julia was just confused by the whole thing. "What happened to him?"

"He joined the Army after we broke off the engagement. It would never have worked."

"I don't know about being in a play, Quinn. Someone should write one about your life. I feel ridiculously boring in comparison." Mel sighed.

Rachel, Kurt and Quinn left a short while later and made their way out onto Broadway.

"Shall we get a cab back or the bus?" Kurt knew Quinn must be tired and a little emotionally spent and wanted to make life as easy as possible for her.

Rachel was about to insist on the taxi, but Quinn surprised them both. "Can we just walk a bit, I want some fresh air for a while."

They both nodded and walked either side of her. After a while, Rachel held out her hand for Quinn to hold. Kurt watched and thought it was beyond cute. He never would have guessed after the last three years of high school that the three of them would be such good friends now. He and Rachel had butted against each other for quite a time and they both wanted what Quinn had, Finn. It all seemed utterly ridiculous and juvenile. Now here they all were, the best of friends and doing the things they had dreamed of. He was a little lost in thought when he felt a nudge on his hip. Looking down he saw Quinn holding out her other hand for him to hold. He took it, feeling how rough her hands were in comparison to his own. He felt a little sad because he knew why.

_He remembered a while ago holding her hand and feeling the same thing only he didn't understand why she would let them get that way deliberately and offered to help her out with a hard skin remover and some moisturizer. She had just laughed at him. 'You're such a dork sometimes. If I scrub off the hard skin, I'll end up with blisters all over my hands' she shrugged. He suggested gloves, but she laughed at him again. 'Don't you think I tried that. I wear them out in like two weeks, at twenty dollars a pair, that's a small fortune over a lifetime. I think I'll just leave them alone.'_

Between the two able-bodied friends, Quinn was towed along Broadway for a while. She already had a bag with fresh clothes on the back of her chair, so they went straight past her dorm and continued south for an hour. Eventually they reached Columbus Circle and Rachel decided her feet had had enough. They paused to rest for a few minutes on a bench while Rachel eased off her shoe and rubbed her feet.

"You really should wear sensible shoes," Quinn commented.

"I thought she already did," Kurt quipped, only to receive a pout from the brunette and a guttural laugh from Quinn.

She put her shoe back on and stood. "It's late and I need to go to sleep. Ready?" She looked at Quinn.

The blonde nodded and rolled forwards to the line of cabs along the south edge of central park. "Ready."


	25. Chapter 25

Disclaimer: As usual, I am not owning Glee

Chapter 25

"Hey," Quinn tangled Rachel's hair in her fingers. The sun was already up and Quinn still had classes that day.

"Morning," Rachel mumbled. "What time is it?"

"I don't know, but I don't think the alarm has gone off. Give me a second." Quinn out of her chair always needed that extra bit of time to do anything, even roll over and check the alarm. She was on her side facing the middle of the bed and the alarm was behind her on the bedside table. She pushed down with her right elbow to force her body over onto her back and then because her legs were now tangled – she knew from experience, even if she couldn't feel them – she pushed up into a sitting position and pulled back the sheets. Her legs were pretzelled and so she pulled them apart and straightened them. Finally she was able to turn to look at the clock. "Six-thirty."

Rachel groaned, initially out of irritation at the time and then a different noise escaped her as Quinn leaned over and kissed her neck.

"I wish we didn't have to get out of bed today," Rachel grumbled.

"Well why don't we hang onto that idea tomorrow. I don't have to be anywhere, do you?"

Rachel shook her head. "We need groceries at some point, but I can go on my way back this afternoon."

"What time are you done?" Quinn had an idea forming and she had already spoken to Kurt about plans for the evening. Typically the night Santana wasn't working that week was the night Quinn wasn't performing either. They had been disappointed and Quinn wanted to cheer her up. She also wanted to do something special for her three closest friends and as luck would have it, all three were going to be in that evening. Rachel had already suggested they watch a movie together and it went down well after their busy few weeks in the run up to Spring Break.

"I'll be back here around six I guess. Are you still going to come over?"

Quinn nodded. "I might be here before you, but I'll just let myself in if that's okay."

"It's why we gave you a key."

Quinn smiled. "Shall we get take away?"

"I guess. I doubt anyone will be in the mood for cooking today."

Quinn knew exactly what she was going to do. Santana would be in at six as well and Kurt was getting a haircut so wouldn't be in until a little after that. Her idea was definitely going to work.

At two that afternoon, Quinn took a cab from Morningside Heights to the nearest Whole Foods and picked up everything she needed. She had one of the store assistants help her outside with the bags; she had double her usual two bag limit. Outside, the taxi she had ordered was waiting and the assistant put the bags in the trunk for her. She broke her chair down and pulled the frame in the back while the driver put the wheels in the front next to him. The process was reversed at Rachel's apartment, with Quinn getting herself sorted in the chair and offering the driver a little extra to help her to the elevator inside with the bags. He followed her in and she gave him five dollars extra over the fare. She had the plan all worked out. Once in the elevator she punched the button for the third floor and rode up. At the top, she pushed the door hold button and shoved two of the four bags out of the doors. She then pushed the door hold button again, and the other two bags were pushed out. Finally she held the doors back from closing on her as she exited herself. Going to the apartment door, she opened it and then ferried the bags two at a time into the apartment and then from the apartment door to the kitchen. Glancing at her watch it was now four o'clock. It had taken two hours, but that wasn't so bad considering she had done the whole thing on her own.

Santana arrived in first that evening. As she opened the door, she was met with the waft of something that smelled amazing and she assumed Kurt was back early, but she didn't see him in the kitchen, instead she saw Quinn trying to turn the fan on using a wooden spoon to flick the switch at the rear of the worktop. The Latina walked over and raised an eyebrow.

"You're cooking?"

"I can cook," Quinn said. "I just don't get much chance."

"It smells good," Santana was hungry. "What are we having?"

"Tex-Mex, sort of."

"Sort of?"

"Well the spicy rice I actually learned from Mercedes' Mom so I think it's not so much Tex-Mex but it goes well together."

"Please tell me it's something with meat," Santana implored.

"Relax, I made vegan chili for Rach but the rest of us will be having beef."

"Awesome, can I help?"

"Sure, can you get the fan for me, I can't reach."

Santana reached across and flipped the switch that was giving Quinn such trouble. "Now what?"

"Chop some salad?"

"Cool," Santana got to work with the salad which was sat in the strainer having been washed. "Do you need me to get bowls and things from the cupboard?"

"Please, I forgot about that when I started. We need a salad bowl and dishes." Quinn donned oven gloves and dropped the door down so she could reach in and check the pots of chili being warmed. As she lifted the lid, the smell was amazing.

"That's really good. I didn't know you could cook, especially this. I feel a little homesick for my Mom's cooking now."

Quinn had made the accompanying dips to go with the nachos that were prepared but not cooked just yet. San helped herself to some of the grated cheese.

"Hey, no stealing." She tapped the other girl on the wrist and received a pout in return.

"So how come you snuck in here to cook for me?"

"It's not just for you," Quinn grinned. "It's for the three of you but I intend to say something before we eat to explain."

Rachel announced her presence a few moments later and looked at the general chaos going on in the kitchen as she wandered in to see her two friends.

"Q's cooking," Santana shrugged as if to say 'I don't know why so don't ask me'."

"I can see. What's brought this on?"

"Well you guys always end up feeding me when I come over and it's so tight in here that there isn't really room for me to help out ordinarily so I thought I would take advantage of you all being in later than me to cook this evening as I had the time alone to sort everything out."

"What are you making?" Rachel was curious.

"It's a surprise, but don't worry. I don't intend to compromise your principles."

"I'll just go choose something to listen to then," she left and went to the stereo where her iPod was plugged in already. She chose a playlist and put it on, then went to her room to change. She could hear the music, but also the conversation in the kitchen. Quinn was bossing San around which was amusing because no one else would ever get away with it, perhaps Brittany, only she wasn't really the bossy type. They were discussing drinks; Quinn wanted red wine and San wanted beer. Rachel smiled to herself.

Padding out into the living room, she stretched out on the sofa and closed her eyes briefly, allowing the music to soak into her. The gentle teasing that was going on in the kitchen was always entertaining.

"Do you want the salad dressing on?"

"No just let everyone put their own on," Quinn had a wooden chopping board on her lap and was about to lift the casserole dishes out of the oven.

"Hold on. You're not going to put those in your lap," San stopped Quinn before she could pick it up.

"Why?"

"It might spill and burn you."

"I can manage," Quinn's pride bristled.

"I know you can, but …" San puffed out a breath of air. "It just doesn't look very safe. This floor's not exactly smooth."

"There's a lid on for a reason," Quinn's eyebrow quirked in annoyance.

"Please indulge me and let me get them out." San could see the steam escaping and she had seen her friend spill things on occasion because she couldn't move and hold onto something at the same time. She only had to turn slightly with the dishes, but even so, she didn't want to spend the evening in the ER with Quinn being treated for burns.

"Look, I know you're all hard and shit, but you can't move and hold onto that at the same time."

Quinn rolled her eyes. "Here," she pulled off the oven mitts and handed them over.

Santana took them and quickly got to work removing the dishes from the oven. "Thanks," she said after placing them down on the table mats.

"What are you thanking me for?"

"For letting me help." Santana bit her lip. "I know it's not easy and I know it must annoy you." She lifted the oven door closed and threw the mitts on the worktop. "I just had visions of you spinning around and the pot tipping. I've seen you spend way too much time in a hospital Q and I don't want to be going back with you again anytime soon."

"Is that your way of saying you care about me?" Quinn was still a little put out.

"Dios mio, who else would have put up with all your crazy-ass shit when we were in school?"

Rachel had overheard the whole thing and was actually laughing. "Guys, I can't take anymore. Pack it in will you? You're both bickering like an old married couple and no offence San, but that's my job."

Kurt arrived back at just the right time to interrupt them. Santana guessed that Quinn could handle everything from there on so she went to explain that dinner was nearly ready and he should freshen up before they started eating.

Rachel looked at Quinn's face. She was a little unreadable at that moment, stuck between Santana's having stepped on her independence and revealing that she cared a lot. Quinn shrugged and removed the nachos from the microwave, placing them on her lap and rolling to the table.

Rachel took the red wine, her fathers' like to send a case every once in a while, that was already open and poured a glass for Quinn and herself. "Are you angry or just frustrated?"

"The latter."

"That's understandable."

"You didn't interfere, I noticed."

"Not my place. You didn't fight her too hard."

"She's probably right. Last thing I need is adding burn scars on top of everything else." She sighed. "I'm fine. I just wanted to do it all by myself. It was important to me."

"You did do all this by yourself. Someone taking a pot from the oven for you doesn't detract from everything else." Rachel bent forwards and gave her a kiss on the lips and then felt Quinn tug her sweater, an indication that she wanted the brunette to sit in her lap.

Rachel dropped down and they pulled each other into a tight embrace. "I love you so much. You must be tired out this week and yet you still went to all this effort when we could have just ordered pizza or something."

"I wanted to do this for the three of you. And I love you more than anything, just in case you might be in any doubt about that."

Santana was a little wary re-entering the kitchen. "Safe to return?"

"Why wouldn't it be? I put all the sharp knives in the dishwasher!"

"Funny, Q. Very funny. Can I get some wine?"

"I thought you wanted beer."

"Changed my mind," the Latina shrugged. She poured the remaining wine into two more glasses and set them down on the table where she and Kurt were sitting.

Kurt's hair was shorter than he usually wore it, but still styled without a single hair out of place. He took his seat and waited for Rachel to move from Quinn's lap to the table. Quinn removed the apron which had been protecting her clothes and rolled over to the empty space where a chair used to live, but that had been removed some time ago and not put back.

Kurt looked up from admiring his hair in the back of a spoon. "So, Miss Fabray. Are you going to let us in on the secret?"

"There's no secret, Kurt." She paused and cleared her throat. "I wanted us all to share a meal together, and not a take-away either. It's just something I wanted to do for you all to say thanks. I can't imagine having gone to Yale now, not on my own so soon after I was paralyzed and I have just had an amazing time here. The three of you have been so supportive and encouraged me to push myself, especially emotionally and I just felt the need to do something nice to let you know that I really do appreciate it. I feel like I can be much more honest with people now and I don't think that would have been possible without the three of you. So I would like to propose a toast." She shifted her body weight forwards and had to put her left hand on the frame of the chair as she lifted her wine glass in the right and reached out towards the center of the table. "To my best friends, I love you all and thanks for pulling me in the right direction over the last few years. Cheers."

"Cheers!" The other three were moved as they all took a sip of wine after the toast.

"This was a lovely idea," Kurt said. "I hope you know that you don't owe us anything though. You have always been worth the effort, Quinn, even if you didn't always believe that."

Quinn gave him a wry smile and nodded. "Thanks Kurt. And San, I'm sorry if I made you feel bad earlier. You were probably right."

"No sweat, Q. I got your back, always."

"I know and I appreciate that more than you know." She shook her head a little and then grinned. "Let's eat."

"What are we having?" Rachel was curious.

"Well, we have salad and fresh bread."

"You made bread?"

"I did, one of the few things I remember doing with Mom when I was younger. We also have nacho's and the cheese is vegan so you can eat it Rach, followed by chili. The carnivores have beef and Rach has five beans instead, but it's good so feel free to eat what she doesn't want; there's plenty."

They all tucked in. Santana was ecstatic at the home baked bread and there were no complaints from the Latina about the vegan cheese either, which was amusing as she usually made fun of Rachel's diet.

Having eaten their fill, leftovers were stashed by Kurt and Santana who also stacked the dishwasher and left it to run whilst Quinn and Rachel made themselves comfy on the sofa in the living room. The intention was to watch a movie, but Rachel was content to just have the music playing and talking. They had opened a second bottle of wine and it sat half empty already on the coffee table. Quinn had lifted herself out of her chair and onto the sofa and was now lying with her head on the arm and her legs draped across Rachel's lap. Her glass of wine sat on the floor, where her right arm could drop from her stomach where it lay to pick it up with ease.

Rachel absentmindedly massaged Quinn's feet and lower legs. Quinn watched Rachel's blank expression and thought it was cute, she was humming and completely lost in the music. No one else invested themselves so much in the music as Rachel did. The brunette's right hand rested on Quinn's left knee and the other had started out holding the blonde's foot, rolling her ankle one way and then the other. She had pressed her hand against the sole of Quinn's foot to stretch her Achilles tendon and was now working her way up the calf, kneading the soft skin beneath her fingers. All of this whilst having her eyes closed and swaying her shoulders and head to the music. After a few minutes Santana and Kurt wandered in and sat down, he dropped onto the other end of the sofa and San draped herself over the armchair sideways, her feet dangling in mid-air. They were both quiet because Quinn had put a finger to her lips and pointed at Rachel's dreamy state. The three of them watched as Rachel even lifted Quinn's uncooperative right leg across the left and started massaging that.

"Owww! What was that for?" Rachel protested as a cushion was thrown at her head by Santana.

"Please stop the humming. It's driving me nuts and just get a room will you."

Quinn looked round at her friend and quirked an eyebrow. "Jealous much? Just because you haven't been getting any lately, don't take it out on us."

"How do you know I haven't been getting it on of late?" the Latina pouted.

"Because you can't keep anything a secret, hello, Brittany!"

Quinn took a cushion to the head shortly after.

"Stop picking on me, at least I'm not messing anyone around, unlike Kurt," Santana nodded.

"Why are you bringing me into this? And I'm not messing anyone around." He was a little too defensive in his tone.

"You kind of are, though, Kurt." Quinn still hadn't had a chance to talk to him about Michael. "I know you were hurt by Blaine, but you should make your mind up and either forgive him and accept him back into your life or move on. It's not like you don't have other options."

"It's not that easy. Blaine kind of broke my heart and I don't really know if I can trust him again. I still have feelings for him, but if I can't trust him to be faithful, surely those feelings alone aren't enough to make a relationship work."

"I don't really have a great record where being faithful is concerned," Quinn admitted. "But I don't think that I was ever really in love before now. I couldn't imagine ever cheating on Rachel and I guess that's what you have to ask yourself. If Blaine truly loved you like you love him, would he have cheated?"

"I can understand the temptation. I sort of flirted with Chandler last year and I think I broke his trust then."

"Please, sending text messages and spending the night together aren't the same thing," Santana interjected.

"Even if nothing happened?" Kurt asked. "He swore they didn't have sex and I think I believe him."

"San's right, Kurt. Even if they didn't do the dirty, he still allowed someone else to tempt him into spending the night and that's a long way from flirting." Rachel liked Blaine, but just didn't think he was as mature as he sometimes made himself out to be. "Maybe you need to try other relationships out before you decide anything."

"I guess we aren't officially back together or anything, but it still feels like I am cheating on him when I have been on a date and I feel guilty about stringing Michael along because I know how he feels about me."

"If you didn't still have feelings about Blaine, do you think you and Mike might be a couple?" Quinn asked. "Because, he's not going to continue waiting around forever."

"Has he said that to you?"

"Not in so many words, but I get the feeling that he is well aware of your history with Blaine and he could just decide that it's not worth the hassle of spending time with you, if you still want to be with someone else. It's a bit unfair to keep him dangling like this."

"We always have a really great time and I know we have a lot in common. It feels really easy to spend time with him and in comparison, each time I get together with Blaine, we end up at each other's throats arguing about who is to blame. Maybe I should just tell Blaine that I can't see him anymore, but then he's just going to give me those puppy dog eyes and cry on me and my heart will melt all over again. I'm so confused."

"Then at least be honest with Mike and tell him. It's up to him then if he wants to walk away. And if that's what he decides, you have to let him go because it's unfair to pull him back if you don't really like him enough to break up completely with Blaine."

"You're right, I know you're right. God, I can't believe that I am taking relationship advice from the Queen of Broken Hearts."

Quinn laughed. "That's okay; I can't believe I'm giving it." A soft chuckle broke out amongst the four of them. "So listen, I had an idea and I want to run it by you all."

The others all looked at her expectantly.

"I was thinking about throwing a party for everyone back in Lima at the start of the summer vacation. I kind of wanted to get all of the Glee Club back together to say thanks to them and Mr Schue. Plus you know I kind of wanted to do something to thank all our families for putting up with the teenage tantrums that we put them through. We all had our fair share of dramas, me more than most…"

"That's the truth," Santana laughed out loud.

"So what do you think? I got in touch with Figgins and he said I could hire out the school gym and we could decorate it, kind of like at prom. It would be great to just have everyone important to us in the one place together and have a blast, sing some songs, dance the night away."

"I think it's a great idea," Rachel replied. "I for one would be happy to have everyone for old time's sake. I miss Tina and Brittany. Sorry San, but I do miss her a lot."

"I know. It's fine, I miss her a lot too."

Quinn turned and looked San in the eye. She could see her friend's eyes glisten slightly even if the tears didn't fall.

"I wonder if Finn might be home anytime soon." Kurt worried about him all the time. "I miss him more than anything else about Lima except my Dad."

Rachel shook her head. "I think he said his tour would be at least nine months. That would mean he wouldn't be back until the end of August at the earliest."

"Maybe we could try one of those satellite link-up things with him. I think they can Skype." Quinn was thoughtful and knew Artie would be the best one to ask. "Anyway, now that I know you are all in favor of it, I'll go ahead and make the arrangements. We just need to try and gather everyone in Lima at the same time. Then I was wondering if you two would like to go away for a while with me and Rach, you know, like a vacation, but sort of adventure type thing?"

Santana had been saving money and planned to stop working for a while before she started college in the fall. "Count me in, I am so over with working in the bar and I can't wait for summer. What about you Kurt?"

"It's really kind of you to ask, Quinn, but I think I should really spend time with my Dad. I know he's been given good news about his treatment, but I still don't want to take him for granted, so I think I will have to decline."

"It's fine Kurt, we understand," Quinn reached over Rachel's lap and their hands met for a gentle squeeze. "I thought that's what you might say, but we would have loved for you to come along."

"Maybe I might be able to join you for a few days somewhere, depending on your plans. Where are you going to go?"

"I was thinking about seeing the Grand Canyon and Monument Valley because they are so iconic and I really want to shake off my repressive childhood, so where better than Vegas and LA or San Francisco. I want to see the Hollywood sign and go for one of those cheesy tours of Beverly Hills. I know it's really embarrassing, but I kind of want to go on a road trip. We all grew in this small town in the middle of Ohio and I just feel like I've never really seen anything of my own country."

"It sounds magical, Quinn." Rachel sighed and kissed Quinn's hand. "Thank you for inviting us."

The following morning, Quinn had to leave early again. She had swimming practice and two buses to catch. Every time she thought about the buses, a little voice in her head wanted to just get a cab, the money was just sitting there and that's what it was for, to make her life easier. But an easy life wasn't what she was destined for, she knew that now. Her life was never easy growing up and since the accident, her fate was sealed. But in acceptance of herself came the understanding that she was okay with that. It didn't matter that taking a bus was a pain and that sometimes she had to wait a little extra time because the ramp wasn't working on the first one. It didn't matter that it took her longer to get somewhere or to get in and then especially out of her wet swim gear, because Lycra and paraplegia weren't a good combo. It didn't matter that her legs didn't kick in the water, that in fact they just bobbed around and that her turns were painfully slow at the end of every lap, none of it mattered because she was still going somewhere and she was still swimming. If that wasn't a metaphor for life, she didn't know what was. So she tried not to wake Rachel who was still half asleep with her hair fanned out across the pillow and slid effortlessly into her chair. She got her bag and rooted around for her swimsuit. She had it almost to her hips when Rachel's eyes popped open and searched for Quinn. Chocolate and hazel eyes met each other.

"Don't look at me like that," Quinn begged. "I am already running late and I don't need your 'please come back to bed' eyes on me as a distraction. Go back to sleep."

Rachel didn't speak and Quinn couldn't dress without looking at where her lower body was. She glanced away and continued to tug the skintight material over her hips and up to her bare breasts. She swore she heard a groan and looked up. Rachel's eyes were exactly where they had been.

"I asked you to stop looking at me like that," Quinn tried to be cross but couldn't keep a straight face.

Rachel didn't reply but she did roll off the bed and walk towards her. Quinn continued to pull the straps over her shoulders. "Hopefully I can still make the next bus, but there isn't another for half an hour on a weekend, so you can't keep looking at me."

"Take a taxi," Rachel replied. "Or better yet, don't go, come back to bed."

"I can't miss any more. I missed the last three already for rehearsals. I'll get dropped."

"So what? You don't swim to compete against anyone else. You do it to compete against yourself and why would they drop you, you inspire the rest of the team."

Quinn blushed. "I do not."

"Do," Rachel countered. "I talk to them when I come to watch you swim. They can't believe how hard you try to catch them and they can't imagine how hard it is to swim when half your body doesn't work. You make them work harder. They see you and realize there are no excuses."

"Exactly why I need to be on that bus. No excuses."

"You need breakfast."

"I can't eat before swimming, I never do."

"Quinn, just stop for a while okay."

Confusion just fluttered across Quinn's face, she didn't get what Rachel meant. "Stop here you mean?"

"No. I mean just stop for a while. Be still."

"I don't understand," Quinn ran a hand under the strap of her swimsuit and then pushed up on the chair wheels to reseat her hips in the correct place.

Rachel sighed. Quinn was only ever still when she slept or was reading. It was a fact that when she was awake, she was always moving, even unconsciously. Even if she was sitting in her chair, she was never sitting still. She was always fidgeting. Sometimes it was just adjusting the position of her legs, which she did a lot, and it didn't really make sense because physically she couldn't feel them so it wasn't to make herself more comfortable. It was unconscious and Rachel guessed she didn't even realize she was doing it. Other times it was rocking back and forth just an inch or so, flicking her thumbs against the tires on the back wheel and then rolling them back again. If she was waiting for anything, she would tip onto the back wheels and lean her head against a wall and so the same thing. Lying in bed or on the sofa, she would play with a pillow or cushion to keep her fingers from resting. If they were together, she would draw circles on the palm of Rachel's hand or tease her hair, stroke her arm. It had taken a while to notice at first, it was always just small gestures or movements, nothing exaggerated, nothing that was attention seeking. Once Rachel had noticed, she hadn't been able to stop looking for the moments when Quinn was just still.

"You are never still. Do you even know that about yourself? Apart from when you are asleep and I mean deep asleep, the only time you are still is when you are reading. The rest of the time, you are constantly fidgeting."

Quinn shook her head and was about to deny it, when Rachel put a hand on hers. She had been about to slip it under her knee and adjust her leg.

"Stop."

The blonde girl stared at Rachel's hand on her own and just looked at it.

Rachel sat back on the bed, but kept her hand where it was. With her free hand, she pulled at the frame of the chair and tugged it around so they were sat opposite each other. She then placed that hand on Quinn's other one. "Why do you do that all the time?"

Quinn looked a little startled.

"Why do you constantly move your legs around and keep adjusting them. It doesn't seem to make much sense."

"Do I do it that often?"

"Constantly. I mean, not when you are doing something else, but if you don't have something else to occupy your hands, they seem to just gravitate to your legs and …" Rachel shrugged. "I don't get why you can't be still."

"Does it make you uncomfortable to see it? I mean, I don't do it deliberately but I guess it kind of makes it obvious that they're useless and it probably makes people uncomfortable." Quinn was rambling. "I don't even realize I'm doing it."

"Then why do you think you do it? Why is it so hard to be still?"

She shrugged. "I'm not even sure. Is it that bad? Does everyone notice?"

Rachel replied with the same shrug. "It's worse when you are nervous, but even when you aren't it's still there. I noticed when you first came back to school and you constantly used to look down to see where your feet were, almost like you had to keep checking to see that they were still in the same place. And I think I forgot after a while because there were bigger things happening. I think the next time I noticed it was when Shelby came over unannounced that time and I watched as you spoke to her. The whole time you told her about the accident, you had your hands under your knees and kept lifting them and nudging them around."

Quinn realized what Rachel meant. She did do that a lot. "It's to stop myself feeling trapped I guess." Quinn's eyes looked up, she couldn't look at Rachel just at that moment. "I think it goes back to when I was in the hospital and I couldn't move. It was so frustrating. I know you probably felt the same when you woke up as well. Just lying in that bed, I felt like I was trapped. I couldn't even move my head," her voice cracked a little.

"It wasn't so bad for me. They let me sit up straight away, even though my legs felt funny."

"I never really asked you what it was like," Quinn allowed her eyes to meet Rachel's. "I mean, you asked me what it was like, but I just realized I never asked you. I asked how you were when you first came to see me, but you never spoke to me about what it was like to wake up afterwards."

"I haven't told anyone." Rachel's gaze fell to her lap. "I was just so worried about you that I didn't think I had any right to complain about how I was feeling and the doctor reassured everyone that I would be fine, so I didn't feel the need to share it."

"You never talk about it to anyone. I sort of do because people ask me about the chair, so it forces me to discuss it, but outwardly, your injuries healed and so it doesn't come up as a topic of conversation for you."

"I .." Rachel looked like she wanted to say something but didn't know how.

"You were hurt Rachel. I know you think that because you got better and I didn't that it means my suffering was worse, but it wasn't. I was the one who got all the attention and all the help and within weeks everyone just assumed that you were okay, but the fact that you still can't talk openly about it means that you're not, are you?"

A slow shake of the head followed Quinn's question. "I was selfish."

"How were you selfish?"

"When I woke up, I did ask about you straight away, but you were still unconscious and I wasn't allowed to see you. I was lying in the bed thinking that I had lost everything. I couldn't move my legs and Finn looked at me like I was broken so I thought there was no way he would stick around if I was in a wheelchair and there was no way I would get to come to New York and get a chance at fulfilling my dreams. I was shattered. I kept crying and praying that something would happen to give me back what I thought I lost and then about two days later the pins and needles started and I realized that the doctors were right and I was going to be okay. When I saw you, I felt so guilty that I had thought about praying for myself instead of you. It's why I never spoke about it after that. I felt ashamed. Especially because I should never have agreed to get married. I should have listened to you when we were in the bathroom and you got your offer from Yale. You said then that we were too young and this magical life was waiting for me in New York and Finn wasn't destined to be part of that life. If I had listened to you …"

"Don't!" Quinn put her finger over Rachel's lips. She closed her eyes briefly trying to quell the uneasiness in her gut. "Don't say 'if only'."

"But…"

"No!" Quinn was forceful. "You don't get to take the blame. If I had told you earlier how I felt about you, everything might be different. If I hadn't suggested coming to the wedding, everything would be different. If you hadn't insisted on being there for me after the accident, I would have continued to push you away. If it hadn't been for the accident, I would have walked away from Lima at the end of the year without telling you anything about the way I felt. That accident, which could have cost us so much more, let us get closer until we finally realized how we both felt about each other. I think it kind of saved me and allowed me to find myself. You should never feel guilty that you prayed to be whole again. I prayed for myself. It didn't work, but I still prayed even when I knew in my heart that it was pointless. Each time I saw you in rehab, I was so happy for you, but I was gutted for me. I wasn't getting any better, I was just getting stronger and more capable. You were recovering and I was envious. That was one of the reasons I found it hard to spend time with you after you were released from the hospital. But you must understand that I never wanted us to switch places. I never once thought it should be you instead of me in the chair," Quinn stared into Rachel's eyes to convince her that it was the truth.

"I know, but there were times when I wished it had been me and not you. I mean if it had to be one of us. I would have changed places in a heartbeat if I could, even if it meant I lost everything I wanted. I felt like my stubbornness and refusal to listen to reason landed you in that chair and you so didn't deserve it after everything else that happened."

"We don't always get what we deserve, Rach. I thought I didn't deserve you for a long time," a small smile crept across Quinn's face. "Sometimes I still think I don't deserve you."

"But you do." Rachel's earnest features made Quinn's smile spread even further.

"I know that now, but back in school I didn't. I felt pretty worthless for a long time and that was before the accident. Now I know different. I get that I am a worthwhile human being now and despite my skinny useless pins, I also know that you think I am still beautiful and if you think that, I can accept it as well. I can look at myself in the mirror now and not be appalled at how imperfect I look. I can accept the imperfections as just part of who I am."

"You are beautiful though. I mean that empirically. I have never looked at another face the way I look at yours, it will always be breathtaking."

Quinn ducked her head and for the first time since they had started talking, Rachel finally released Quinn's hands. They didn't move. Quinn just left them where they were.

Rachel placed a finger under Quinn's chin. "I don't know about you, but I feel better for that. How about some breakfast?"

Quinn gave her the smile she had been after. "I guess skipping practice won't kill me."

"How about we go swimming together? We haven't been together since last summer. Let's just go later today for fun, not for your PB or whatever."

"Okay, I'd like that." Quinn was thoughtful for a moment. "You know ages ago you made me promise to stop you when you start talking too much?" Rachel nodded. "Do you think you could do the same for me if am fidgeting too much? Just if you think I am making people uncomfortable."

"I will, I promise. It wasn't other people's comfort I was worried about though. It was yours."

"I guess it's just my version of pacing or tapping my foot."

"Do you want to know what you used to do?"

Quinn nodded.

"You used to sit with your legs crossed, left over right, with your elbow on your knee, chin in hand and you would swing your left foot backwards and forwards absentmindedly. I used to watch you in the choir room during Glee Club. When you were standing at the lockers or something, you would have your weight on your right foot and tap your left just behind it."

"I did?"

Rachel nodded. "I noticed things like that."

"I guess I have forgotten the things I used to do. It's pretty funny really when you think about it. We have all these silly little habits that we don't realize."

Rachel placed her hands under Quinn's right knee and lifted her leg onto her lap. It was heavier than it looked. Quinn's legs had always been slender but toned through the three and a half years Rachel had known her before the accident. Even when she had been pregnant, Quinn's figure had remained trim. Now the legs were very thin, the worst of the atrophy had already taken place; her regular swimming had maintained some muscle, but not much. Even so, Rachel thought they were still beautiful. She couldn't look at them as imperfect, like Quinn did. To her they were still warm and soft and part of Quinn's identity.

Quinn looked at Rachel a little oddly, wondering what she was doing.

Rachel cradled Quinn's foot in her hands and raised it to her lips, planting a soft kiss on top of it. Dropping it back into her lap Rachel looked into her girlfriend's face and saw a slightly perplexed grin.

"What was that about?"

"I just wanted you to know that whilst you might think of yourself as imperfect; you said as much a few moments ago, I don't think that way about you or your legs. I know you can't feel them but I can and to me they feel amazing. I love your legs, just as much as the rest of you." She gave Quinn a lopsided grin.

The blonde just sighed. "You're adorable, Rachel Berry."

Over the following days Quinn's remaining performances in the play went off with barely a hitch and on the closing night, they celebrated late into the night. It was also the last day of college before the holidays, so there was even better reason to stay up late and celebrate. They had lunch out with Shelby and Beth the next day and day after that saw the four friends take the train to Lima and see their families for the break.

After the short holiday, it was back to normal college routine for the remaining couple of months. Santana was still waiting to hear about her applications hoping she might get early admission, but nothing had come through yet. She had made lots of applications and so far was unconvinced that she was going to get what she wanted. She knew NYADA wasn't for her, she was no Rachel Berry and musical theatre just didn't do it for her. She had applied to Columbia, but thought it was a bit too Ivy League. Tisch had a recorded music program but only at Masters level. She wanted to sing and dance, but lacked classical training which ruled out Juilliard. She could have looked at the universities with great sports programs and tried for another cheerleading scholarship, but she had hated how restrictive and exhausting it was. She had thrown in some applications to a few less well known places and particularly liked the look of the Fine Arts program at the New School, where she could major in theater or contemporary music and minor in something cool like photography. She actually had her fingers crossed about that one. Pace was another possible, but dominated by acting. It was all so confusing. She really just wanted to be back in Glee Club most of the time and was a bit jealous that her three friends were really happy with their choices.

Rachel spent a lot of time thinking about her songs she would be performing for the Summer Showcase at NYADA. She wanted to do something upbeat and of course her specialty, a power ballad. In the end, she decided that a recent favorite would get another outing, but she refused to share it with Quinn, for a whole host of very good reasons. The other song would be something by Celine Dion, but which one to choose? In the end she decided upon an old favorite.

Quinn also had a review show and wanted to sing for Rachel, so she decided upon her song and just to throw Rach off the scent she spent a lot of time humming one or two of her own favorites, chuckling to herself that Rachel would never guess she had chosen a Celine Dion song too. With the swim season over she had much more time to think about new things she wanted to try out and did a little research into local theater groups.


	26. Chapter 26

A/N: Thanks for feedback as always. It's really nice to have people suggesting ideas too, so feel free to continue.

Anyway, on with the story.

Disclaimer: I do not own Glee

Chapter 26 – **Content warning – Rated M for mild sexual content - so if it offends you don't read it!**

"Hello," the voice on the other end of the phone had a strange accent that Quinn couldn't quite place from just one word.

"Oh, hi. Can I speak to Helen Brown please?"

"Speaking," the voice replied.

Definitely English, Quinn thought or maybe Australian. "Hi, my name is Quinn. I emailed you a couple of days ago and you asked me to phone."

"Nice to speak to you in person. Thanks for getting in touch. How can I help?"

"I was wondering about joining your group if possible, I know it's probably a little late in the season, but I only just found out about it."

"We are already in rehearsal for our next show, but I am sure we can find something for you to be involved in, even if it's nothing major this time around. We rehearse on Saturdays at the moment. Are you free then?"

"Yeah, I am."

"Good. If you can make it around ten, that would be great. We start earlier but it will give me time to get everyone going and then we can chat. You have the details of where to go from the website I take it?"

"Yeah, thanks. Is it okay if I bring a friend? I'm not really familiar with that part of the city, not that I need a babysitter, but she'd love to come anyway."

"No problem," Helen replied.

The call ended shortly after.

Saturday morning came around. Quinn, accompanied by Rachel, travelled on the bus to a high school in the Bronx. They were both a little nervous, aware of the reputation, but found they were a little mistaken. The area seemed safe, even if it was clearly a working class one.

Quinn rolled up a shallow ramp at the entrance to what looked like a brand new school as she had been directed, while Rachel went up the steps alongside and into the building. There was an employee in the entrance who directed them to the auditorium, where voices could clearly be heard.

A little nervously, Quinn pushed open the door and was met by a large performance space opening out in front of her. She could see a few people on stage and some more down the front, a number of whom were in wheelchairs.

She rolled forwards and down the gentle slope to the bottom much faster than Rachel could walk. A few heads looked her way as her wheels made a slight whirring sound when they went quickly.

A woman in her forties peering over some notes turned to look in the direction of everyone else's attention and gave her a warm smile and a wave. "Hi, are you Quinn?"

Quinn nodded. "Yes, are you Helen" she rolled forwards and turned to face who she presumed was Helen. With a grin, she nervously held out her hand to shake. "Nice to meet you."

"Oh good, fresh blood!"

Quinn turned to see a guy in a power wheelchair up on the stage grinning at her. She blushed furiously and Rachel laughed at her embarrassment.

Helen turned and gave him a look that made his face fall and he quickly apologized. "Don't be offended, he's just joking." Helen placed a hand on Quinn's arm. "Forgive me a minute I just need to sort something out then I'm all yours."

She gave a series of instructions before turning back to Quinn and Rachel who was now stood beside her.

"This is Rachel, my girlfriend." Quinn introduced the brunette who immediately held out a hand to Helen.

"Nice to meet you both." She turned her attention to the blonde. "As you can see, plans for our next show are fairly advanced, but some of the group are playing more than one role, so we should be able to fit you in."

"I wouldn't want to disrupt anything. I could maybe just understudy if you like. I really don't mind."

"We can maybe work that in as well," Helen looked over to Rachel. "Are you here to cheer Quinn on or are you interested in joining us as well?"

Rachel looked a little surprised. "I just came in support really, but I would be happy to help out with anything."

"Rachel's at NYADA, she's a musical theater geek."

"I am not a geek," Rachel huffed slightly, "I am just enthusiastic."

Helen looked bemused at the couple's gentle teasing.

"Quinn is a rehabilitated former jockess, so she doesn't fully understand the artistic merits of the creative mind," Rachel decided to fight dirty.

"Former jockess?" It was the first time Quinn had heard herself referred to as that.

"Well cheerleading is an athletic pursuit is it not?" Rachel seemed insistent.

Quinn groaned slightly. "Just because I called you a geek, did you have to bring that up?"

Helen watched the two with a grin now. They probably didn't even realize how funny they were. "Well, that's quite an introduction. So Quinn, cheerleading?"

The blonde rolled her eyes. "It was back in high school, I haven't been a cheerleader in a little while," she glanced down at her chair without thinking.

Noticing the slight change, Helen raised her brow as if seeking an explanation without actually wanting to make her feel like she was being quizzed.

"I'm a freshman at Columbia and I am going to major in theater. I recently got a big part in a play and I think it went well but I got some really helpful feedback from an acquaintance about my performance and I could use some help. Because I am the only one in the group in a chair, no one really knows how to help and I don't have a huge experience acting yet, or even being in the chair so I looked around to see if there were any local theater groups featuring disabled performers and I found you guys." Quinn shrugged.

"I see, so when you say you don't have much acting experience?"

"I was in Glee Club for three years in high school and not to brag but we were pretty good."

"National Champions actually," Rachel added.

"And as Rachel grassed me up I was a cheerleader as well."

"Let me guess," Helen said, "National Champions?"

Quinn ducked her head a little embarrassed and nodded. "I wish Rachel hadn't brought that up."

"What part did you just play?"

"Beatrice in Much Ado About Nothing."

"Wow, pretty hardcore for a first big role," Helen looked impressed.

"She was amazing," Rachel said gazing at her lover.

"And you said you lacked experience with the chair as well?" Helen fished again for a little more info.

"I, or rather, we were in a car accident last February. We both got pretty banged up, but I guess I came of worst physically. I suffered a spinal cord injury which left me a paraplegic."

Helen didn't say anything immediately, she just nodded. Quinn didn't need her to say anything really, she looked as though she had been through something similar herself. "Look I could use something to drink, now these guys are on task, let's go and have a little chat in the kitchen." She nodded across the other side of the stage and the younger women followed behind.

Making their way through a door into the backstage area, Helen led them down a hallway with dressing rooms marked on one side and eventually at the end was a small kitchen.

Helen went to the coffee machine, where a large pot of coffee was already brewed. "Do you indulge?" Helen asked in her clipped English accent.

"Yeah, sure." Quinn and Rachel both nodded.

A few moments later Rachel pulled away a couple of chairs to leave room for Helen and Quinn to pull under the small café table. Helen didn't even need to move to shift the coffee pot from the machine to the table, she simply lifted it down and swung it across. They all helped themselves to the black nectar.

"Have you been running the group long?" Rachel asked.

"About eight or nine years I think. We just moved here though from a church up the road. I work at the school and I persuaded the principal to let us use it. We are just a community group and we run on a pretty tight budget so she was happy to help us out."

"So you're a teacher here?"

Helen nodded. "I teach drama mostly and a little English Lit."

"Cool," Quinn nodded. "We both have a lot of respect for teachers."

"Thanks." Helen returned to Quinn. "So tell me about your performance and how we can help."

"Well, Rachel's Mom had a friend who is an agent and she thought I did pretty well, but she said that when I move around on stage something happens to my voice. How did she put it Rach?"

"I think she said you lose connection with the audience a little because you move too quickly sometimes and your voice tends to drift as a result."

"That happens quite a lot," Helen agreed. "It's just a timing issue, not even that difficult to solve. You just need to remember when to deliver a line and adjust your movement accordingly."

"One of my friends said the same thing, he likened my performance to him saying his lines whilst sprinting across the stage." Quinn gave a wry smile. "I understand, but I thought that working with other people in chairs might help me learn to perform better next time. Plus, as Rachel pointed out a few weeks ago, I guess I only have one disabled friend back home in Ohio. I feel a little uneducated still about a community that I should belong to. So I suppose I would like to get to know other people who are in a similar position to me as well."

"It's part of why we formed the group in the first place. We don't exclude able-bodied people, but primarily we are here to give opportunities to those with a disability."

"Did you start the group because you have a disability yourself?"

"That was how I became involved, but I didn't actually start it. It was a community project initially and I was approached as a drama teacher who just happened to be in a chair as well. I started out acting, but took up teaching because it was a regular income. I thought I would go back to performing but actually I really enjoyed the job. I was already teaching for a few years before I was injured skiing."

"Sorry to hear that," Quinn said.

"Don't be, I'm not. I think I'm happier now than I was before. Not that it didn't mess me up for a while. It took me three or four years to get on top of life again. You seem to be coping remarkably well considering it's still relatively new. How long did you say?"

"Last February, so fourteen months."

"So you started university in September?" Quinn nodded. "Gosh, just a few months after. And how has it been?"

"Great to be honest. I was accepted at Yale, but I went to take a tour to check out how accessible it was, I found it really hard going. I switched to Columbia and it's been really easy to manage physically. I suppose I am still finding things out but it gets easier each day."

"I think you're amazing," Rachel placed a hand over Quinn's.

"You're biased," Quinn smiled.

"Okay, well I hadn't counted on you being quite so young after our conversation on the phone, so I might have to re-think what I was going to suggest. How about we go out and I introduce you both. Then we'll see where we can fit you in."

"Sounds good."

"I must just warn you, both of you really. I know you said you hadn't spent much time with other disabled people. Just so you know, being politically correct isn't a strong point of most group members. This being a bit new to you, it might be a bit of a shock."

Quinn just grinned. "I don't mind. You should meet my friend Santana."

"Is she the one who is disabled?"

"No, she's just the rudest person ever. She calls me a crip, like actually to my face and everything."

"To be fair, you do actually use that term occasionally yourself, Quinn."

"Why do you have to be so honest all the time, even when I'm trying to impress people?"

They went backstage, where Helen called a cast meeting to introduce them to the other group members. There were around twenty altogether and from a variety of social backgrounds and ages. It was definitely an eclectic mix of people. There were about eight or nine in wheelchairs, but Quinn guessed the reasons for the wheelchair varied. There were some she suspected had a similar injury to her, but others who clearly had other causes.

"Okay guys, I just wanted to introduce two new group members. Say hi to Quinn and Rachel." There was a ripple of greetings from the assembled group before Helen continued. "Perhaps you would like to introduce yourselves?"

The teenagers looked at each other and Rachel indicated Quinn should go first.

"Hi, I'm Quinn. I'm nineteen and a freshman at Columbia majoring in theater. I'm a little new to all this so forgive me if I seem a bit naïve. I was injured in a car accident last year and I am still figuring things out for myself." She looked up at Rachel for her to start speaking.

"I'm Rachel and also nineteen and a freshman at NYADA. I am studying musical theater and dance. Quinn and I were at school together in Ohio and I was also in the accident that she got hurt in, but I was exceptionally fortunate and recovered from my injuries. I want to support Quinn and educate myself where possible, so that's why I came along."

"Thanks both of you. I am sure everyone will introduce themselves as they get a chance. Because a number of you are doubling up characters, it seems sensible to make life easier by giving some of the parts to Quinn and Rachel."

Quinn heard someone say "Thank God!" and looked up to see who it was. She smiled at a woman with bobbed fair hair who looked to be around thirty years old and was also in a wheelchair.

"Jennifer, I was thinking the same thing." Helen laughed. Turning to Quinn, she explained. "Jennifer has the lead but was doubling up a secondary character which required three difficult costume changes." Turning back to the other woman, she announced Quinn would take the minor role. "It makes sense to have her understudy you instead of me doing it as well, I have enough on my hands already and the two characters are never in the same scene so it works well." Helen turned to Rachel next. "I'd like you to play several roles which don't have much to say but are important and again, it avoids some of the more difficult costume changes, plus you can understudy the role of Dr Evans as I was also doing that."

"Sounds good to me," Rachel grinned.

"Alright, Act One, Scene Four is up first today. Everyone to their places. Quinn and Rachel you are in the scene after so I need you to do a quick read through together and then you can take over. Don't worry about remembering lines for today, you can use scripts."

Everyone started moving and those required for the scene got ready. Quinn rolled out to go backstage with Rachel following. They moved into the rehearsal room out back and received a few welcome introductions. They were met with genuine warmth from everyone, including the guy from earlier who had shouted out from the stage.

"Sorry about earlier," he grinned as he steered himself towards the blonde. "I'm Eric."

Quinn could see that he didn't have full use of his arms and hands. He offered a hand, but as he couldn't really shake hands, Quinn just raised hers and gave him a fist bump. "Nice to meet you," she replied. "I think."

He grinned again. "I couldn't resist. We don't have that many younger members and I already have to put up with my Mom at home so I can do without any more middle-aged people."

She laughed at him, realizing that he probably wasn't much older than her. Nodding, she conceded his comment had been well-timed for comedic value, if a little insensitive. "I guess we should get to work if we have to be in the next scene." She waved her script for emphasis.

"I'll let you get on," he turned his chair and zipped further away to work on his own part with another guy, this one able-bodied who was stood waiting slightly impatiently for him to return.

Quinn turned back to Rachel. "He's not as bad as I thought after earlier."

Rachel smiled. "You can't blame him for noticing you when enter a room. You've always been able to capture the crowd."

"Yeah, but I'm only interested in capturing you," Quinn grabbed her hand and squeezed it. "We better get going."

They turned their attention to the scene they needed to act out shortly.

As they finished up just after one that afternoon, Quinn and Rachel said their goodbye's and made for the exit. They passed Helen who was still looking through notes. "See you next week girls." She nodded, then thoughtfully called them back.

"Anything wrong?" Quinn asked. She thought they had done quite well considering they had gone in cold without even seeing the script.

"Not at all, you two are quick learners. I was wondering something and you might be able to help."

Rachel looked especially thrilled at the idea of being able to do more. "We would love to if we can."

"I was wondering if you had any classmates who might like to help us out for this show in particular. We lack able-bodied males in case you hadn't noticed." Helen shrugged. "I don't suppose you would know any who might be willing to turn up. They aren't major parts, but it would really help us out a lot."

"We know a few, but I can't promise they will come. Our friend Kurt might be able to join us. I'm not sure what type of role you want to fill, but I should warn you that he's the very opposite of butch."

Quinn shook her head at Rachel's description of Kurt.

"We'll be grateful for anything you can do to help on this."

"How many parts do you need filled?"

"Two, but the only able-bodied males we have are both in the same scene so they can't do it. It saves one of the ladies having to man up."

"We'll put the word out and see what we can come up with." Quinn was amused by Helen's phrase. "See you next week."

They left moments later and headed back to Quinn's dorm so she could collect some things to take to Rachel's for the remainder of the weekend. As they went out the door, Rachel followed Quinn down the ramp and when they got to the bottom, they saw Eric just getting into a large minivan via a ramp out the side door. They shouted goodbye to him and he gave them a wave.

Heading down the road for the bus stop, Rachel was thoughtful. She stuck out a hand for Quinn, who slid hers into the smaller one. Rachel didn't speak for a while, which was an uncommon experience, so the blonde knew something was going through her girlfriend's mind.

"Penny for them?"

Rachel looked down beside her and watched Quinn's other hand flick the wheel of her chair effortlessly. Her glance returned to the slightly quizzical expression she wore. "I'm just very grateful at the moment."

"What for?"

The brunette looked down briefly and then returned her gaze to the hazel eyes questioning her. "I was just thinking about Eric. It must be very hard to have so little use of his body and I was just thinking how lucky we were in comparison. That could have been us so easily, so at this moment, I'm very grateful."

Quinn's grip on Rachel's hand tightened a little in acknowledgement. "I thought that earlier as well. I know everyone was feeling bad for us after the accident, but seeing someone who's life is so much harder than mine always makes me think that I got off lightly in the end."

"I wouldn't say you got off lightly Quinn. That would be doing you an injustice after how hard you have worked. But you're right in that either one of us could have ended up being stuck in Lima, still living with our parents because we didn't have a choice about the future. I'm so glad you were able to start college straight away and I'm really proud of you for getting through the first year. I know we didn't really talk much about the anniversary because we were both pretty upset, but how do you feel about it now?"

"Like it's just something I had to get through. I feel more grown up I suppose. I was always in a bit of a rush to grow up but for all the wrong reasons and then suddenly I was _forced_ to grow up. It was just a surreal experience and I look at how much my life has changed but with no regrets, Rach. If I learned anything from all of this, it's that I like who I am now, even if I can't walk or run or jump. I'd rather be the person I am now and be physically limited than who I was before and be able to walk. I don't know if it's some kind of karmic trade-off, but I am happier now than I have been for so many years. A lot of that has to do with you as well."

"Really?"

"Of course, I can't you tell how much more content I am with everything."

"I wasn't aware that I had much to do with that. I thought it was more to do with you having regained your independence and making a great start to your time here."

"None of it would have mattered if you hadn't forgiven me for the way I used to treat you. I would never have been happy with myself without that. You are a very forgiving person and I think I'm not sure how our lives crossed over, but I'm thrilled they did."

"Wow, that was quite some speech for you."

"Thanks."

"If it's karmic force you are looking for, Mr Schue is the one to thank."

"I guess. He was such a good Glee coach."

"No, I meant that he was responsible for both of us being in Glee. I was going to leave unless he found a male lead and so he heard Finn singing in the shower in the boys locker room and planted pot in his locker to bribe him into joining. If Finn hadn't been forced to join, you never would have either." Rachel shrugged.

Quinn was speechless. "Really? I would never have thought Mr Schue was even capable of that level of deceit; I wouldn't have put it past Sue Sylvester, but Mr Schue?"

"I know. Finn told me after graduation."

"So we owe him an even bigger debt than I thought."

"I guess we do," Rachel nodded and leaned in for a kiss.

"The bus is here," Quinn nodded towards the approaching vehicle as Rachel released her lips.

They rode the bus back to Morningside Heights and went into Quinn's room. She emptied out some things from her backpack from the night before and re-packed some clean clothes. "I really need to do some laundry," Quinn noted the overflowing basket. "Do you mind staying a while until this lot goes through the machines?"

"Of course not. We can stay here tonight if you want, so long as we are at mine first thing tomorrow to see Shelby and Beth."

"I'd rather go to yours if that's okay. I'll just go and get these in the machine and I'll be back. Do you want to make some tea?"

Rachel nodded and made her way to the kitchen, while Quinn carried the basket on her knees down to the laundry room. She found Julia stood ironing in there.

"Hey Quinn."

"Hi. How are you?"

"Good, you?"

"Great thanks. Rach and I just got back from the Bronx. We joined a community theater group."

"Sounds right up your street, but the Bronx?"

"Yeah it was good, not even slightly scary."

"Is this the group you were talking about before, the one for disabled people?"

"It's a mixture of able-bodied and disabled people actually, so it's good because they made Rachel feel welcome as well."

"I guess it would be nice for you to spend time with other people who get what it's like. I mean, we all love you and stuff, but we know we don't really understand what it's like."

"I guess. Does it sound a little crazy to say that I am not as comfortable around other disabled people as I probably should be?"

Julia shrugged. "A bit," she looked at Quinn who was actually wrestling with a sheet to get it in the machine, which was a top loader and just a little high for Quinn to reach comfortably. "Do you need a hand?"

"Your legs might prove more useful, but yes please," she chuckled. "I should have sent Rach down and she could do this while I get the tea."

Julia tipped the basket of clothes into the machine and Quinn tossed in the detergent capsule after and set it running.

"Let me know if you need a hand to take it out later, I'll be in all evening."

"Not going out tonight?"

"No I'm trying to keep a lid on my spending and I was out last night."

"We're just going to head back to Rach's after my laundry is done. Her Mom is coming over tomorrow so it saves me having to use the bus on a Sunday."

"So will you get to see your daughter as well?"

"Yeah. I can't wait to spend some more time with her."

"We haven't really had a chance to talk to you much about it since you told us. I can't imagine how hard it must have been, especially when your folks kicked you out. I thought you got on well with your Mom though."

"I do now, she kicked my Dad out for having an affair, which is ironic because he kicked me out for being immoral. Go figure."

"Do you ever see him?"

"Nope, not since the day he threw me out."

"So does he even know about your accident?"

"Yeah, Mom told him. He never even came to visit me when I was in the ICU. But it's fine. He's a jerk and I don't care about him anymore."

"What sort of man does that to his child. I can't even begin to imagine."

"I don't care if I never see him again. If he ever comes near me, Santana has threatened to hurt him and to be honest I wouldn't mind seeing her have a go."

"She's so cool and a great friend I bet."

"The best kind, not that she'll admit to caring much."

"She's very funny. She says things to you that we would never dare say."

"I know, but that's why I love her. Talking of Santana, I always get the feeling and forgive me if I'm making completely the wrong assumption, because truthfully my gaydar is nowhere near as good as hers, that you might be interested?" Quinn screwed up her face as if to protect herself in case she had misread the situation.

Julia actually blushed. "I didn't ever really dare say anything. I mean, I thought that she might be, you know, but I wasn't a hundred percent sure because she doesn't say much about herself that way. I haven't even really come out or anything either, I am a bit unsure I guess, but she definitely catches my attention whenever I have seen her around."

"I wasn't sure about you either. I sort of got a vibe, but I didn't really want to make you feel awkward in front of anyone else."

"You and Rachel are the only girls I know who are openly in a relationship and I sort of wanted to talk to you about it, but I hardly ever see you on your own."

"Look I'll be honest. Neither Rach or I really know much about being gay either. We weren't sure about ourselves in the beginning and I am a little hesitant still to call myself that. I guess we are, and we're open about it, but I don't necessarily think of that as being part of my identity the way some people do. Kurt is definitely GAY, but he's always known and accepted it about himself. I guess Rach and I are just in love with each other and the fact that we are of the same gender is almost irrelevant."

"I don't ever look at a guy and think of him as sexy, I see girls that way instead. I think that definitely means I am gay, but I don't really know what to do about it."

"Maybe you should talk to Santana about it, she's a little more educated about it I guess. Plus she had a hard time accepting it too, so maybe she can help you."

"I'd like that, if you think she wouldn't mind."

"Cool. I'll talk to her tonight. Actually, why don't you just come over to Rach's. You can always sleep on the pull out bed in the living room and then you can stay for lunch tomorrow with us."

"Don't worry about me, I wouldn't want to intrude on your family time."

"It's not an intrusion, honestly. We all just help out with making lunch and getting things ready. It's no big deal to include one extra. Come on, you'll enjoy it and all it will cost you is the bus fare."

"Don't you want to check it's alright first?"

"Will that make you feel better about accepting?"

Julia nodded, her light brown ponytail bobbing up and down.

Quinn took out her phone and dialed Santana. "Hey, Satan what's up?"

Julia watched as Quinn's face broke into a smile at something her friend said.

"I am with Julia and she was going to spend the evening ironing, so I invited her to come back with me and Rachel and stay over for lunch tomorrow, but she's being difficult and insisting I obtain permission first. She's worried about being a nuisance!" Quinn paused briefly and then chuckled before handing her phone to Julia. "She wants to talk to you."

"Err, hi Santana," Julia heard Quinn's Latin friend reply.

The Latina's voice came through. "So Q seems to think you would be turning down her offer on the grounds that we'll consider you a pain in caboose," Santana commented.

"I wouldn't want to be in the way," Julia was being polite.

"Joolz, seriously. Tonight we will probably have takeaway pizza and watch a movie and tomorrow I am going to chase around the apartment after the rug rat, so it's nothing special that you'd be interfering with. You're a friend and friends are always welcome here, especially if you have any culinary talents, because to be honest, Quinn can barely fit in the kitchen with more than one other person in here and Rachel's cooking, well let's just say it's limited."

"I can help with roast dinners if that's any use?"

Quinn smiled having heard Santana's comments before that.

"Then you're hired. Get your butt over here with Q tonight, we have Domino's on speed dial."

Julia agreed and handed the phone back to Quinn who spoke to her friend again. "Thanks San, see you later."

Quinn left Julia finishing up in the laundry and made her way back to her room where Rachel was waiting with tea. She told her all about Julia and Rachel agreed it was a great idea.

"You know with a houseful of people tomorrow we aren't going to get a lot of time to ourselves this weekend?" Rachel had a sneaky grin on her face.

"Rachel Berry, are you suggesting that our extra-curricular activities may have to be curtailed because of a house guest?"

"Well you wouldn't want anyone to overhear would you?"

Quinn raised a brow. "You're the screamer."

Rachel looked at her with mock outrage and threw a pillow at the blonde.

Quinn's eyes widened. "Just remember later on, you started this." Quinn rolled towards the brunette sat on her bed and firmly pushed her shoulders back, knocking Rachel down onto the mattress. The blonde slipped from her chair to the bed and lay beside her girlfriend, rolling onto her side and leaning into Rachel's arms. The petite diva pulled Quinn further into her until she was pretty much pinned to the bed. They started kissing, tongues and saliva gradually merging as the pair couldn't get enough of each other. Half an hour later, they were both naked, panting with gasps as they played with each other's erogenous parts. Rachel was subjecting Quinn's breasts and ribs to constant feather-light strokes which drove the blonde crazy. Quinn's left hand was buried in Rachel's silken hair at the nape of her neck whilst the other was buried in her slit. They were sat facing each other, Quinn's legs draped over the top of Rachel's which were wrapped around the blonde's hips. Leaving Quinn's breasts alone for a moment, Rachel could feel herself beginning to near the edge. She reached around Quinn's back to pull her closer. Her fingers found themselves brushing over the ten inch scar running down the small of her lover's back. A hiss escaped from Quinn's lips at the touch. She couldn't actually feel some of it, because Rachel's hand was teasing the hypersensitive area, as well as above and below the line where sensation ended. It drove her nuts, but she loved that Rachel didn't mind the imperfection, in fact she always took time to caress it, just so Quinn knew this.

Rachel knew she would probably go first, it was so much easier for her. It always took a little more time for Quinn's body to respond, but she loved it when it happened. Seeing Quinn orgasm was about the best feeling Rachel ever had in her life. Knowing that the former cheerleader didn't have sensation in half her body had made her so sad the first time they tried to make love. Rachel had so much desire that she came quickly, but Quinn hadn't and it took some time to get her there. She had patiently talked Rachel through everything that made her feel good and although it had made the experience feel a little bit like a lesson, eventually the brunette had seen how Quinn's body responded to her touch. All the places that normally resulted in the hitch of a breath and a cry of pleasure had moved north because of her injury, and although it didn't feel like it had before, the pleasure center of her brain had fired and the warmth that spread from her breasts out to the rest of her body was electric. Rachel knew all the little tricks now, tweaking Quinn's nipples, stroking her breasts, sprinkling light tickles down her sides and across her ribs and most of all, teasing the inch of skin joining the area she could still feel and that which was now numb.

Rachel didn't hold back from touching the parts of Quinn's body that no longer had any sensation though as well and it was easy to see why. She loved to trail kisses from the blonde's feet right up the inside of her thigh, the closer she got to Quinn's abdomen where sensation began again, the noisier her breath became, anticipating when she would finally feel what was happening was part of the pleasure. Rachel always used her fingers inside Quinn's folds, she didn't care that Quinn couldn't feel it, she knew her lover could see it and that made her all kinds of happy. The blonde had explained how being able to see what was happening helped her brain to sense it and remember what it used to feel like and soon enough Quinn held her breath and cried out as the ivory skin across her chest and neck flushed red.

They held each other for a while after allowing the heat to gently dissipate. Both had a sheen of sweat across their brow from the exertion. Quinn glanced across at her clock and realized they had lost over an hour of time. "Rach, honey?"

"Hmm," the brunette's dreamy reply drifted up from where she was curled happily on Quinn's chest.

"I can't move until you do and I need to take a shower now you've disheveled me."

"What? It's not my fault you're too horny."

"It's all your fault, I told you that earlier."

Rachel pouted and rolled away, allowing Quinn to raise her body back into a sitting position. Once she had her balance, Quinn reached over and took Rachel's arm. "Thank you. I love you so much."

Rachel's pout melted and was replaced by a huge smile. "I love you too."

"Shower time," Quinn muttered, shoving her legs off the side of the bed. Pulling the cushion from her chair, she dropped it on the bed and slipped across into the seat.

Rachel saw the naked form adjust herself in the chair and turn slowly towards the bathroom. "Wait a minute," she called.

Quinn's upper body turned so she could look at Rachel with a questioning glance.

"I want to take a shower with you," the brunette looked hopeful but then saw Quinn's face drop slightly. "I just thought, you know that it's what people do and we've never tired it and I would really like it if we did, but if you don't feel comfortable doing that I don't mind. I wouldn't want to make you unhappy."

Quinn sighed. She could sense Rachel's disappointment and realized it was her facial expression that had caused it. "I wouldn't be unhappy, it's just, I don't know. Showering for me is a bit awkward, physically I mean. It's not going to be like you think, all romantic and stuff."

Rachel stood and walked around the bed. "I just want to be near you a little longer. I know what you have to do, but you've never let me see. Being with you means doing things a little differently, but that's fine. I don't care if you have to shower sitting down. You don't have to protect me from the things which are different."

"I'm not protecting you, I just don't think it's going to be what you expect showering together to be."

"But you are trying to persuade me now that I wouldn't want to be part of that experience."

Quinn sighed. Rachel was always so persistent and to be honest she didn't have much resistance where her girlfriend was concerned. "Don't say I didn't warn you." Quinn rolled into the bathroom and went to the shower area. The room was essentially a large wet room with a shower fitted to one wall. There was a bench seat which folded down under the shower head for Quinn, but which Rachel normally folded back up so she could stand under the running water. Quinn followed her normal routine, shifting to the bench and then pushing her chair back as far as she could. She draped a towel over the seat of her wheelchair to prevent the back getting wet once she was done. She then pulled across the curtain, though now Rachel was beside her. The screened off area was plenty big enough for the both of them because it was designed so that someone could assist if necessary, even though in Quinn's case it wasn't.

Quinn reached up and took down the shower head and turned on the water. It was freezing cold initially so she aimed it at the tiled floor. The water sprayed Quinn's feet but of course she didn't know just how cold it was, whereas when the water hit Rachel's lower body, she screamed a little. Quinn just laughed and squirted the water even higher which made Rachel literally jump back out of the way.

"Oh my gosh, oh my gosh." A shiver broke out across Rachel's body and Quinn saw the goose bumps spread over Rachel's legs. "That's freezing, you monster!"

Quinn put her hand under the water and checked the dial. "Silly me, I forgot to turn the temperature up enough."

Rachel rolled her eyes. "You did that deliberately," she moaned.

"I swear, I had no idea," Quinn quickly upped the dial to warm the water. "Sorry, but it was pretty funny. You should have seen your face." The water was warm now and Quinn reached up to put the shower head back in the cradle. "Put it up higher so you can get under and warm up." With Quinn seated, she couldn't reach high enough, even though Rachel wasn't very tall. "I must remember to get you to move it back when we're done or I'll never be able to reach it." Quinn chuckled as Rachel moved closer and the warm water cascaded down from her head and shoulders.

Rachel let the water run and soak through her hair. Quinn reached for the shower gel and held it out to Rachel and squirted some in her hand. It smelled like strawberries. Rachel sniffed at her palm. "It smells like you," she grinned, dropping down onto her haunches. Rachel rubbed her hands together creating pink lather and then began to massage it into one of Quinn's legs. She gently ran her hands all over the slender calf and then lifted her thigh to continue further up.

Quinn watched on, gripping the bench as Rachel lifted her leg to maintain balance. Once she had finished the first leg, Rachel started with the other, holding her hand out again for more gel. It was pretty arousing to see Rachel's small hands massage, knead and caress her lifeless legs.

Rachel knew exactly what she was doing. She was making herself horny as hell and giving the blonde a clear indication that showering sitting down was every bit as erotic as showering standing up. Rachel had finished and knew where she wanted to go next but instead she found Quinn scooting back a little further and getting some gel lathered in her own hands. This time it was the brunette's legs in for some caressing as Quinn indicated for Rachel to place her foot on the bench between Quinn's knees. The seated girl started to rub the suds into the lightly tanned skin. Quinn adored Rachel's legs ever since she had seen them in knee high socks and a plaid mini skirt in sophomore year at McKinley. When she had finished with Rachel's legs, she made the short girl sit with her back to Quinn on the bench and the blonde washed her back, before mercilessly attacking her boobs from behind. Rachel eventually turned the tables on her lover and peeled away from her. Rachel then made Quinn sit forwards so she could slip in behind her and wash her back, followed by shampooing her hair. Quinn was a little worried she didn't have much room to sit on, but Rachel curled her legs around Quinn's to keep her from slipping forwards. At one point, Quinn could smell the shampoo and felt Rachel's fingers run through her scalp. She tipped her head back onto the brunette's shoulder and closed her eyes.

"I'm really sorry neither of us thought about doing this before."

"I thought about it a few times actually."

"Why didn't you say anything?" Quinn tried to turn but as she did, she felt Rachel catch hold of her.

"Careful, you almost twisted out from under me." Rachel allowed Quinn to adjust her hips a bit. "I didn't say anything before because I didn't know if you would let me in." She saw the blonde head nod. "I know that some things are hard for you to let people see, even me and I didn't want you to think I was trying to intrude or embarrass you."

"I would never think that about you. I know you are naturally inquisitive, Rach. But I do trust you with the private stuff, well most of it."

Rachel made sure Quinn wasn't going to fall before climbing back out from behind her and then she sat on the floor between Quinn's legs which dangled from the bench. The blonde understood. She shampooed Rachel's hair next and took her time massaging the long dark hair. When she was done, Rachel stood and took the shower head down so they could rinse off completely. She ran the water over Quinn's short cropped hair and in turn over her own. When they were done, she adjusted shower back to Quinn's height and turned off the water.

The curtain was pulled back and Rachel stepped out to pick up a towel from the rack before handing it to Quinn. They both dried off and then Quinn pulled her chair back and slid into the seat. She glanced back at Rachel who was wrapping a smaller towel around her hair in a turban. "I love you for things like this, you get that right?"

Rachel nodded and a broad grin stretched across her face.


	27. Chapter 27

A/N: So this chapter is a bit cute and fluffy, but i don't care, author's prerogative

Thanks for those of you who sent supportive messages and have made my story one of your favorites - much appreciated!

Disclaimer: Glee does not belong to me

Chapter 27

The bus ride to Rachel's was an interesting experience for Julia. She had spent time with Quinn before, but usually just in the dorm or the local bar and coffee shop. The only time she had seen the blonde out of her chair was at a swim meet or relaxing on her bed. Quinn had been allowed to board the bus first and the driver welcomed her on board. The ramp was not exactly shallow, but Quinn shoved her way on easily without help. She swiped her pass on the reader and went to the allocated spaces. The driver must have recognized her because Quinn told her she could sort out the seat on her own and the driver just nodded. Rachel followed her and as always didn't interfere unless asked. She just watched on as Quinn tipped up the bench seat at the front to make room for her chair. The restraints for the wheelchair were just left lying on the floor unused, but Quinn applied the brakes to the wheels, which she didn't often do. Rachel sat in the seat directly behind where Quinn was parked as the first seat was now blocked by the wheelchair. Julia took the seat beside Rachel and they waited for the rest of the passengers to board. It was a bit odd to have a conversation with Quinn now because she had her back to them, but the blonde didn't seem to mind, occasionally turning round and giving them a little wave.

Rachel didn't seem to think much of the situation and chatted about their upcoming performances and whether Julia might be able to go and watch.

Julia was keen to hear Rachel, apart from karaoke, she hadn't heard her perform but had listened to Quinn enthuse about her voice. "Quinn's always telling us about how amazing your voice is so I'd love to come and see you perform."

"I would normally say she is biased, but I confess that I am blessed where my voice is concerned." Rachel's lack of modesty was normal for those who had heard her, but Julia almost laughed at the brunette's apparent arrogance because it was so completely contradictory to everything else about her.

"It's a bit annoying that Quinn is so far away, especially when the bus is busy. You must get annoyed when you go places together."

"We're used to it now I guess. I used to say the same thing, but she just shrugs it off and says that at least she can get on and go somewhere."

"I suppose. It would be easier if one of us had a car."

"Quinn has a car, but she didn't want to bring it because parking is so difficult."

"She drives?" Julia sounded surprised, but then thought about it and realized that if Quinn could swim, driving must be pretty easy in comparison.

"Yes, though it took her a while to pluck up the courage to drive again after the crash."

"That's understandable. I don't know if I would have been able to if it had been me. What about you?"

"I don't drive," Rachel replied. "I wish sometimes that I had learned because I could have helped more when she was stuck without transport to get to and from school on her own. Santana was a brick and helped her out most days with that though."

It's weird to think that it was only just a little while ago that she could still walk. I guess because I have never seen her on her feet, I don't know any different, but it must still be strange for you guys who knew her before."

"I don't really think about it too much now, though I did at first. It was all I could think about for quite a while. I know this might sound a little odd, but she is actually much more together and happier now than she was before. I think that helped everyone who knew her get over what happened."

They drove for another fifteen minutes then had to change buses before eventually arriving near Rachel's. They made their way to the apartment building and up in the elevator. Santana was waiting for them when they finally arrived. Unusually for the Latina she gave everyone an immediate hug and went to get them all a drink. Kurt arrived back with shopping bags of food for their lunch the next day shortly after.

Rachel showed Julia around the apartment while Quinn went to chat to Santana and Kurt in the kitchen.

"Thanks for persuading her to come over. She was a bit lonely."

"How come she's not out with everyone else?" Kurt asked.

"She says she's watching the pennies," Quinn replied. "She's not much for partying though. Bit of a health nut."

"I figured, she's always just about to go running whenever I see her at yours," Santana commented.

"She brought her kit with her for the morning," Quinn raised an eyebrow as if to drop a hint to her friend.

Santana looked over and met Quinn's gaze. "What?"

"She likes you," Quinn whispered conspiratorially. Looking over her shoulder, she added. "She's nervous about telling you though, so I thought I would assist the process."

"She's cute and I already clocked she was sort of interested. Every time I say something to her she blushes slightly and can't quite meet my gaze. But then again, who wouldn't be into me when I'm all kinds of awesome?"

Quinn groaned but a smile on her face. "Will you talk to her? But please don't embarrass her either, she's confused about coming out and I figured you would understand that more than me or Rach."

Santana nodded. "I can do that."

"Why don't you talk to her now, tell Rachel I want to ask her something and find out what pizza she likes."

Santana jumped down from where she had been sitting on the countertop and wandered around until she found Rachel and Julia looking over the extensive DVD collection trying to decide what to watch.

"What pizza do you like?" San asked Julia. "Quinn's about to order."

"I eat anything, except Hawaiian. Pineapple on a pizza is just wrong!"

"I doubt you would want to eat what Rach gets, no meat, no cheese, a glorified vegetable sandwich!"

Rachel glared at her friend for teasing her. "Leave me alone, I like what I like."

"So Joolz, any preference? Meat, veggies, weird shit like fish? Any kind of clue here would be good."

"I like barbecue chicken," she finally admitted.

"Okay. Rach go tell Q what she said and whatever you want but I swear if you get anything with artichokes again I will never speak to you as long as you live." Santana's hand flew out dismissively for emphasis.

"Artichokes, really?" Julia looked a little stunned.

"I swear to God, it's beyond wrong."

Rachel huffed and stomped off to talk to Quinn as Santana's face finally cracked into a huge grin. She put her arm conspiratorially through Julia's and led her to the sofa.

"I am a straightforward kind of girl, so I'm just gonna say it like it is. Q and I had a chat earlier. She told me what the two of you were discussing. You wanna talk about it?"

Julia looked pensive and unsure. "What did she tell you?"

"You're a little confused about your sexuality and you are attracted to girls rather than boys, but you haven't really done anything about it."

She sighed and looked at her hands. "I have felt that way for quite a while, but I didn't really have a chance to talk to Quinn on her own about it until today. There are always people around and she spends a lot of time here so we don't see that much of her in the dorm now. When I did, she said she was no expert and maybe I should talk to you because you had a hard time admitting how you felt and it was tough."

"What's stopping you from saying anything?"

"I don't know, honestly. It's not how anyone will react, I mean no one reacted badly when Quinn told us about her and Rachel. I suppose I'm just not sure myself about how I feel. I didn't really understand why I was never really interested in boys before now. I would get asked out but I always turned them down. I didn't think about how I felt about girls until recently. When Quinn told us, I guess I started to wonder and I've been wondering for a while if that's what I wanted and I think it is."

"I noticed you checking me out," Santana gave her a gentle smile. "I didn't say anything because I didn't know if it was conscious or not."

"I'm sorry, I wasn't even sure about your sexuality until Quinn told me today. I hope you aren't offended."

"Why would I be? Firstly, I am awesome, so why wouldn't you check me out and secondly, you're cute, so it's kind of flattering."

Santana elbowed her in the ribs and smiled so her dimples showed as Julia blushed.

"So, do you want to go out sometime or are you going to stay in the closet?"

"I would really like that, but only if you want to. You're not doing this because Quinn asked you to take me out are you?"

"I would do a lot of things for Q, but I don't do pity dates. I just said you were cute didn't I?"

Julia blushed again. "I would love to."

"Cool, we'll be all traditional and do dinner and a movie, how's that?"

"Excellent."

The following morning Julia woke early having set her phone alarm, only to find Rachel and Quinn were already up. The bigger surprise was Santana who was less of a morning person.

"I was just going to go for a run," Julia explained to Rachel, though her intention was obvious from her sportswear. "Do you want to come with me?"

Rachel enjoyed a workout in the morning and was missing her cross-trainer so she agreed. Santana was wearing her PJs still as she padded out to see what was happening. Quinn emerged from the bedroom shortly after.

"Why don't you go, San?"

"Why don't you go instead?" the Latina replied. "Running was more your kind of thing, I just did it to keep Coach Sue off my back."

Julia looked a little ashen at Santana's comment and wondered if she had maybe crossed the line.

Quinn was just laughing at her though.

"I'd love to go, but I'd just slow you down. Joolz is quick. You're not worried she'll beat you are you, San?"

"Enough of the sparring. I am much slower than Santana so I don't mind jogging at your pace Quinn if you want to go out, I know you are probably missing your swimming workouts at the moment. Santana, make your mind up whether you are too chicken to keep up with Julia or not so we can get moving and not hold her up any longer."

Quinn laughed again and even Julia had a smile now.

"Shut up Berry! When did you grow a pair and since when have I ever backed down from a challenge?"

"I love you, Rach," Quinn stated simply. "I'm not going to go running with you guys, thanks for the offer, but San's face was a picture."

"Hey, Fabray. If I agree to go, you go too."

"Seriously, I already said there's no way I'm quick enough. I know my chair's pretty amazing but it's not made for marathons."

"We should totally get you one of those racing wheelchairs, I bet you would be awesome at that with those guns of yours now."

Quinn rolled her eyes. "Just get out of here and I'll make breakfast for when you get back."

Rachel and Santana both went to get changed while Quinn went into the bathroom. She emerged to find Rachel waiting outside for her.

"Are you sure you won't come with us?"

"Don't be silly. You go and enjoy it. I know I can roll faster than most people walk, but running is much faster and there's all the crosswalks to worry about. It's not very practical. This is one of those spur of the moment things that just isn't going to work for me. You don't have to feel guilty because I can't join in."

"I do though. I don't like you being left out just because its impractical."

"Rachel Berry. I love you, but sometimes you drive me crazy. I am fine here making breakfast. I will do my stretches while you are gone and I'll be going for a swim tomorrow before school starts, so stop stressing and go run."

Santana gave her a look from across the room that made her want to cry a little, but she waved them out the door and headed into the bedroom to do her own workout.

As the three girls ran, it was obvious that Rachel was working hard, Santana was working less hard and Julia was hardly sweating. San had to hand it to her, she was a great runner. They chatted as they ran, though to be fair Rachel was struggling to speak she was so out of breath.

Rachel gave up trying to converse, so she started thinking instead. Quinn would have loved to be out with them, blowing off steam as she always put it and she was missing the swim team training she had become used to. It was a little soul-destroying for Rachel to see Quinn desperate to be able to join in but knowing that it was virtually impossible without planning ahead. She also thought about other things too. The summer road trip was going to mean a lot of driving, a burden which Santana and Quinn would be bearing because Rachel had never learned to drive. It wasn't fair to allow the two of them to shoulder the burden alone. Rachel formulated a plan, but she might need a little help to carry out one bit of it.

They arrived back and Rachel immediately went in search of Quinn. She found her in the kitchen filling the coffee machine. "How was it?" Quinn smirked on seeing Rachel's beaming red face and the sweat stains on her T-shirt.

"I am dying."

"I think that's a gross exaggeration if ever I heard one."

"I wish you had come with us," Rachel leaned over and gave her a kiss.

"Eww. You are really gross. Get in the shower and I'll make you something to eat. How about oatmeal with maple syrup?"

"Sounds good," she ran off.

"Hey Q, what's for breakfast?" Santana shouted out looking less messy than her girlfriend but still showing she'd had a workout.

"What do you want?"

Santana looked at Julia who was definitely less exhausted. "Any requests? Don't mention bacon to Q though, she's trying to give it up."

Julia laughed. "I eat anything, but I am partial to some fruit and OJ if you have any."

Quinn looked in the fruit bowl and wrinkled her nose in disappointment. A banana and an apple is about it. Nothing exotic I'm afraid."

"Do you have any frozen fruit? I noticed you have a blender and I can make awesome smoothies."

Quinn hunted in the freezer compartment. "We have raspberries and blueberries, which must be down to Rachel because I know you didn't buy them San."

Santana snorted.

"That's cool, I heard mention of maple syrup too?" Julia was looking inspired. Quinn nodded and threw the ingredients on the counter. Julia quickly found her way around to the blender and loaded it up with juice and tossed in the banana and whizzed it into oblivion. Quinn kept handing her things each time she put in a request.

"I don't suppose you have any yogurt?"

"Rachel probably has some of that natural stuff without any flavor whatsoever," Santana commented. She opened the fridge and fished around for some. "Will this do?" She handed over a tub of vegan-friendly soy yogurt.

"Perfect," Julia took it and poured most of it in. "Just need the maple syrup now." Quinn again handed it over and watched as the previously yellow mush, turned purple, now went pink. Julia looked pretty satisfied and asked for glasses and straws. Santana collected them from the cabinet and sat them down so each could be filled with a share of the thick, pink gelatinous liquid.

Santana was desperate for a shower and yelled out to Rachel to hurry up while Quinn went back to preparing oatmeal and coffee. Rachel and Santana switched places leaving Julia and Quinn to chat.

"So I take it you and San had a little talk yesterday?"

Julia nodded and blushed a little. "We're going to go out."

Quinn's eyebrow raised. "Good," she smirked. "That's what I was hoping for."

"How did you know? That I liked her I mean."

"It was mostly just how you made little compliments about her to me and your trademark blush whenever she spoke to you."

"Really, that much of a giveaway?"

"I know she has been looking at you appreciatively too." Quinn had seen Santana check out Julia's ass in the dorm kitchen when she had leaned into the fridge one time. "You'll like being with her. She is unique and frankly completely immodest but exceptionally loyal and quick-witted."

"I already like her a lot. Just the way she pretends to be rude to you guys, but really she loves you both to bits. It's very funny and also endearing."

"Mmm." Quinn nodded. "It's just hard to get her to admit it."

Finally Santana and Julia switched places before they were all ready for breakfast. They sat at the table and chatted about where they had been for their run and teased each other. Quinn felt quite pleased that she had brought them all together. Mostly she hoped Santana would hit it off with Julia, because she got the impression that she was going to find herself consoling Michael about Kurt if her Glee club friend's constant exchange of texts with Blaine the previous night was anything to go by. She didn't fancy consoling another friend.

Santana was the first to try the smoothie and a look of heaven passed across her face. "Why is this so good? Surely anything that tastes like this has to be bad for you."

"I don't think so," Julia assured her. "A bit of sugar maybe, but at least it's natural not refined."

"God, it's good. I can't believe that anything with Rachel's vegan yogurt tastes this good," Quinn muttered.

"You know I could be offended. I eat a well-balanced diet and am very healthy, which is more than I can say for Santana when it comes to food choices. How come I always get abused because of it?"

Quinn felt a little guilty. Truth be told, she didn't actually mind some of it, though the yogurt always seemed a bit odd tasting until now. "Sorry Rach, we got a little carried away. I can eat some of it and not notice, so I promise not to make fun of your food from now on."

"Whipped!" Santana coughed into her hand.

"Actually, I think Rachel has a point." Julia nodded. "If more people ate vegan in this country, we wouldn't have so many obese people." Santana looked surprised. "Don't look so shocked. Lots of people have no idea what rubbish they put inside themselves."

"Sorry Rach," Santana held her hands up in surrender. "If what we just ate was vegan, I have been a bit harsh on it."

"Thank you for apologizing Santana. I will call in a favor later as penance."

"I didn't say I was willing to do more than apologize." But everyone knew that Santana would do whatever Rachel asked her to because they were connected now.

Quinn let Shelby and Beth in. As usual, they were met with a glorious smell of roasting meat and vegetables. A quick introduction was made for Julia, who immediately waved at Beth and shook hands with Shelby. Quinn left the others to manage the food and scooped Beth out of the stroller instead.

Shelby went to see Rachel, whilst Santana hearing Beth and Quinn giggling, arrived a moment later. "Squirt!"

"Tana!"

Julia looked amused at the odd 'family' gathering. It was all a bit confusing because Rachel looked so much like Shelby and Beth looked so much like Quinn. Rachel and Beth were sort of sisters and Rach and Quinn were a couple. Somewhere in amongst that was Santana who was a spiritual sister to her school mates and kind of an aunt to Beth. It was a bit strange to say the least.

Beth jumped up and down on Quinn's lap in excitement so Quinn dropped her down to the floor and for a while Santana and Beth chased around the room, literally. Quinn sat in the middle of them laughing for the most part as Beth played hide and seek by crawling under her chair and running to her for protection when San threatened to tickle her until she cried with laughing.

After lunch it was quieter with more adult conversation and Beth sat on the floor playing with her favorite toys. Everyone got beads this time; she brought extra. Kurt was actually thrilled to be dressed up and did a catwalk model impression which made Beth laugh a lot. Quinn dropped onto the floor again to join in and watched as Beth moved her chair out of the way, saying repeatedly, 'Kin, eeeechair!' and ramming it into Santana's shins for good measure on the way.

The two blondes then sat and read a book with Beth nestled between Quinn's crossed legs as she sat against the coffee table for support so she could have her hands free to turn the pages.

"Hey, Q. Looks like some sticky fingers messed up the back of your chair. I'll just go wipe it down in the kitchen."

"Okay, thanks." Quinn turned her attention away from Santana just as her friend had hoped and back to Beth.

The Latina quickly whisked it away to the kitchen to carry out Rachel's secret plan. Without her knowledge, Santana measured every bit of the frame and made note of them in her phone, along with a number of photos of it. She then did give it a little wipe over to make the excuse seem genuine before rolling it back out and parking it next to the sofa.

"All done," she nodded at her blonde friend.

"Thanks, San."

Rachel snuck in for a quick photo of the two of them just as Beth turned to look up at Quinn's face. She managed to capture the expression on both; Beth's expression was one of happiness and Quinn's was of contentment. She held the phone for Quinn to see and got a huge smile as reward.

"Send it to me, I want that as my wallpaper." She took the phone from Rachel and showed it to Beth. Pointing at herself, Quinn asked "who's this?"

"Kin," the little blonde child replied with a cheesy grin, poking the screen with her chubby finger.

"And who's this?"

"Beth," she laughed and then covered her face with her hands.

"Clever girl, Baby B."

The rest looked on at the natural bond Quinn and her child shared with happy grins of their own. None of them had envied Quinn when she fell pregnant, in fact it was just the opposite, they had seen her at her lowest after her father had thrown her out. Now though, they watched their friend as she held Beth's hands to clap them together after Beth answered a question correctly. The little girl's willingness to let Quinn hold her and sit still was pretty awesome because the rest of them usually weren't given the same privilege.

By late afternoon Shelby announced it was time for her and Beth to be on their way. She had enjoyed the afternoon as always now that she was a regular visitor and had established a rapport with the youngsters. It was easy to forget that they were still so young now that they had left school. The changes in all of them had been marked and they were easy to talk to away from the pressure cooker of high school and the hormones that had been floating around.

"Beth, honey. Time to go home baby."

Beth shook her head, happy where she was.

"Come on Baby B, time to go." Quinn's smooth voice encouraged her to make a move. "I need to get back in my wheelchair, do you want to get it for me?"

Beth took the bait and stood up as Santana guided the chair from the side of the sofa forwards a little to meet Beth halfway. The toddler pushed from behind with Santana steering so she didn't bump into anything. With the chair right behind her, Quinn turned herself around slightly so her back was against the frame and flicked on the brakes so it didn't slip away from her when she lifted herself back in. It took a few moments to lever her trunk into the seat and adjust her hips a little. She once again found Beth lifting her foot up onto the bar, somewhat clumsily, so Quinn reached forwards and tucked her legs in a little neater, but thanked the youngster for helping and insisted on a high five.

Shelby turned to the group and thanked them for a wonderful lunch as always. "Quinn, are you staying here or heading back to your dorm this evening?"

Quinn looked over at Julia. "Do you need to get back today?"

Julia nodded, though a little reluctantly. "I should really go back and get my things organized. Plus I have some studying to do before tomorrow anyway."

Quinn turned back to the older woman. "I guess we'll be heading back soon enough."

"Can I give you a ride back then? I have the car today."

"If you don't mind, that would be great. The buses don't run so often on a Sunday." She looked at Rachel who appeared a little glum that her girlfriend was leaving so soon. "I need the bathroom first though. Can you wait ten minutes?"

"Of course, take your time." Shelby gave her a reassuring smile and just set about picking up Beth's clutter from the rug along with Rachel.

Pulling up outside the residence hall, Quinn waited for Julia and Shelby to gather the bits of her chair from the back of the car. She was sat in the front passenger seat and explained how to put it together to them. Shelby released Beth from the car seat so she could give Quinn a kiss and a cuddle goodbye. Beth clambered over to the front of the car with a little help and stood in Quinn's lap for a few moments.

"Bye bye, Baby B. See you soon. Be a good girl."

Two small arms went around Quinn's neck and a sloppy kiss was planted on her cheek. Quinn ruffled the blonde curls and gave her daughter a big squeeze.

"Bye Kin," the toddler said before Shelby lifted her back out and Julia slipped the wheelchair alongside the car door for her friend to slide into. A few minutes later, Quinn waved Shelby and Beth off from the curb.


	28. Chapter 28

A/N: I had some good suggestions for future chapters, so thanks to those who mentioned them. Not that i was running out of ideas necessarily, but i want to keep people interested. Anyway, here's Rachel's performance that so many were wanting to read about. hope you like it. a bit sentimental, but what is life without a little sentiment anyway?

Disclaimer: i do not own Glee

Chapter 28

Back at the apartment, Rachel, Kurt and Santana sat in front of Rachel's pink laptop looking at pictures on the internet.

"There seem to be a lot of different types. Which do you think she would be better off with?"

Kurt was out of his depth. He didn't do sweating, so the idea of a wheelchair for racing was beyond him. "I think we need some expert advice. I don't think it would be a good idea to go ahead and order something and then it be completely the wrong thing."

Santana looked at the photos. "Why don't we ask her physical therapist for a recommendation?"

Rachel was a little nervous about making the call, but dialed anyway. "Hello, can I speak to Paula please?"

"Speaking," a New York accent replied.

"Hi. My name is Rachel Berry. I'm a friend of Quinn Fabray." Rachel was careful to avoid mentioning the full extent of her relationship.

"Hi. How can I help?" Is Quinn okay?"

"She's fine thanks. I need some advice because my friends and I want to get her some equipment but we aren't sure what would be best. I also want it to be a surprise for her so that's why I'm calling without her knowing."

"Okay, what do you need?"

"Well I suppose I should explain the context. A group of us went out jogging the other day and we invited her to join us but she wouldn't go, even though I know she would have enjoyed it. She said that her regular wheelchair wouldn't be fast enough and she would just slow us down, even though I would have been more than happy to go slowly. You probably know how competitive she is and she is missing the swim training at the moment because the season ended so we were wondering about getting her some type of racing chair, but we aren't sure what would be best in the circumstances."

"I see, well there are a lot of choices, but they are usually custom made to fit properly. You can just buy off the shelf, but they aren't always a good fit, especially for someone like Quinn."

"What do you mean?"

"Just that the off the shelf variety were probably made with a man in mind. She's pretty narrow around the hips and even the smaller sized ones could still be too big. They are also a little difficult to use for street training if that's what you were thinking. Most people who train seriously use the track or rollers."

"Oh," Rachel's bubble burst. "We just wanted to make her feel included."

"It's a really nice idea, but they aren't very maneuverable round bends or up and down curbs. They are made to go fast in a straight line."

"I see," Rachel's shoulders slumped.

She was sat in a coffee shop with Kurt, who gave her a serious look and mouthed something to her, but she was lost in thought.

Paula heard the disappointment even if she couldn't see Rachel's face. "I might have a better solution though."

"Really?" Rachel's mood lifted instantly.

"A handbike is easier to steer and probably better suited to use on the streets. It would have gears as well so she can adjust the speed to suit whoever is running alongside. The only problem might be storing it, they take up a bit of space, unless you get the type that attaches to a regular wheelchair."

"Can I come and talk to you about them? I feel like I don't really understand enough yet."

"Sure, I can make some time to see you this week."

Rachel's meeting went well and part one of her plan went into action. Part two followed later in the week and she spent a good bit of time avoiding Quinn for fear she might give the game away.

Quinn had exams to revise for and a performance to rehearse for so she didn't really notice Rachel's avoidance tactics. She also had research to do for their trip in the summer and a party back in Lima to plan. With all that going on, there wasn't much down time.

Rachel's showcase was the first of the summer events they had planned and Quinn got front row seats for everyone to see it, courtesy of her disability. Kurt was also performing so Santana and Shelby sat either side of her and Beth spent time sitting in each of their laps throughout the performances. Carmen, Mel, Julia and Michael were also there as well.

Kurt performed 'Music of the Night' from Phantom of the Opera and as he came on stage he had to stifle a giggle as he saw Beth and heard her shout out "Uncle Turtle!" He had no idea how she recognized him with the mask. Kurt's voice was as perfect as always and he received a huge round of applause from the audience.

Rachel was the final performer of the evening and as she came out wearing a black, knee length dress with tiny gold stars over the skirt. Beth called out "Rachie" and pointed. She was stood on Quinn's legs at the time and there were a few whispers of how cute the little girl was from immediately behind. Quinn turned and grinned at them appreciatively.

As the lights dimmed, the music started and then a spotlight appeared on Rachel and her voice lifted into the air.

For all those times you stood by me

For all the truth that you made me see

For all the joy you brought to my life

For all the wrong that you made right

For every dream you made come true

For all the love I found in you

I'll be forever thankful baby

You're the one who held me up

Never let me fall

You're the one who saw me through it all

You were my strength when I was weak

You were my voice when I couldn't speak

You were my eyes when I couldn't see

You saw the best there was in me

Lifted me up when I couldn't reach

You gave me faith 'coz you believed

I'm everything I am

Because you loved me

You gave me wings and made me fly

You touched my hand I could touch the sky

I lost my faith, you gave it back to me

You said no star was out of reach

You stood by me and I stood tall

I had your love I had it all

I'm grateful for each day you gave me

Maybe I don't know that much

But I know this much is true

I was blessed because I was loved by you

You were my strength when I was weak

You were my voice when I couldn't speak

You were my eyes when I couldn't see

You saw the best there was in me

Lifted me up when I couldn't reach

You gave me faith 'coz you believed

I'm everything I am

Because you loved me

You were always there for me

The tender wind that carried me

A light in the dark shining your love into my life

You've been my inspiration

Through the lies you were the truth

My world is a better place because of you

You were my strength when I was weak

You were my voice when I couldn't speak

You were my eyes when I couldn't see

You saw the best there was in me

Lifted me up when I couldn't reach

You gave me faith 'coz you believed

I'm everything I am

Because you loved me

I'm everything I am

Because you loved me

Rachel saw her adopted sister with Quinn and gave them a small wave. "Ladies and gentlemen, before I sing my second song, I would like to say a few words. The last time I sang this number was in February last year. That day I chose to sing it to the wrong person and then a few hours later I was almost killed in a car accident with the one I should have been singing it to. This evening I get to sing it for the right person."

Quinn finally realized why Rachel had refused to tell her what she was singing and held her breath until the words started.

We could just go home right now

Or maybe we could stick around

For just one more drink, oh yeah

Get another bottle out

Let's shoot the breeze

Sit back down

For just one more drink, oh yeah

Here's to us

Here's to love

All the times

That we messed up

Here's to you

Fill the glass

Cause the last few days

Have gone too fast

So let give 'em hell

Wish everybody well

Here's to us

Here's to us

Stuck it out this far together

Put our dreams through the shredder

Let's toast 'cause things got better

And everything could change like that

And all these years go by so fast

But nothing lasts forever

Here's to us

Here's to love

All the times

That we messed up

Here's to you

Fill the glass

Cause the last few nights

Have gone to fast

If they give you hell

Tell em to forget themselves

Here's to us

Here's to us

Here's to all that we kissed

And to all that we missed

To the biggest mistakes

That we just wouldn't trade

To us breaking up

Without us breaking down

To whatever's come our way

Here's to us

Here's to love

All the times

That we messed up

Here's to you

Fill the glass

Cause the last few days

Have gone too fast

So let's give em hell

Wish everybody well

Here's to us

Here's to love

All the times

That we messed up

Here's to you

Fill the glass

Cause the last few nights

Have gone too fast

If they give you hell

Tell em forget themselves

Here's to us

Oh here's to us

Here's to us

Here's to love

Wish everybody well

Here's to us

Here's to love

Here's to us

Here's to us

The cheers that followed raised the roof and Rachel took a little bow in thanks for the standing ovation, but immediately sought out the blonde on the front row. She was the only person in the audience still sat down, not that Rachel was in the slightest bit bothered by that. Quinn had tears running down her face, though had a huge smile and Santana's arm was wrapped around her shoulders.

Rachel was still surrounded by applause, but as she met Quinn's gaze, she couldn't resist but to move towards her.

Quinn looked at Santana and Shelby. "Guys, help me out here. I need you to get me onto my feet."

"What the f…," Santana looked at her stupefied and only just stopped herself cursing in front of Beth in time.

"I'm serious, help me," she pleaded.

Santana looked at Shelby, who looked at Quinn for some instruction. Meanwhile Rachel figured something was going on, but wasn't sure what. She watched as some sort of discussion broke out between the three women and Beth was handed over to Carmen. Quinn pushed her feet from the footrest to the floor and fiddled with them until they were straight. She gave a quick nod to Santana, who just grabbed the back of Quinn's jeans and hoisted her, sort of onto her feet. Quinn's knees were buckled and she grabbed Shelby and Santana round the shoulders. Realizing there wasn't much holding her upright, Santana placed her leg in front of Quinn's knee to brace it and as it seemed to work, Shelby shuffled hers in place as well. It wasn't pretty, but it was sort of effective. There wasn't a spare working hand anywhere to clap for Rachel, but at least Quinn had managed the standing part of the ovation.

"Oh my gosh!" Rachel squealed as she realized what was happening. "What on earth are you doing you crazy woman!"

She ran forwards and reached around Quinn, whose face was showing the strain because she was literally clinging on for dear life to keep her body upright. Rachel took her weight a little as well so that Quinn could now remove an arm from around Shelby's shoulder and place it around her girlfriend instead. Santana pulled even harder as Quinn's weight sagged a little.

The audience were wondering what was happening but as recognition spread that the person Rachel had sung to was in fact the girl in the wheelchair, the applause which had died down began again for the impromptu drama being played out in front of them.

Carmen Tibideaux was amongst those who showed shock initially, but then a slow smile spread across her face as she recognized the motivation behind the performance. She had been impressed by the passion Rachel Berry had shown when she had auditioned for her, but her performance that evening had been another level again.

"You are insane, Quinn Fabray. You're going to hurt yourself."

"I don't care, I love you so much right now that I couldn't sit there and watch while everyone else is standing for you."

"They were both for you, you know. Both those songs were for you."

"I know and as much as I would love to stand here for a bit longer to celebrate that with you, I think I'm about to collapse. Guys, can you drop me back down." Quinn took a huge gasp of breath as Santana just grabbed around her middle and hauled her back in the chair.

Quinn wasn't the only one who was exhausted. San's face was bright red from the effort of holding her upright for the minute or so she had been standing.

"A little more warning next time you want to do that Q, okay?"

The blonde wiped the hair that had fallen in her eyes back. "I think I'll save it for the standing frame next time, San."

Shelby looked bewildered for the most part, but felt strangely light. She watched as Rachel reached for Quinn's hands and squeezed them before stepping back onto the stage and giving another bow and a wave to the audience before running off backstage.

Quinn slowly settled herself back into the chair and dragged her feet in afterwards. She was well aware she had just made a spectacle of herself and probably embarrassed her friends, but she actually didn't care. She found it hard to do spur of the moment things these days and it felt amazing to do something completely ridiculous.

With the show over and the house lights back on, Quinn had Beth in her lap again and was chatting to her while they waited for Rachel to change. There were others still milling around the stage.

"Quinn, that was a crazy stunt you just pulled," Mel shook her head laughing. "You should have seen everyone's faces when they realized what was going on. You know how to cause a scene."

Quinn blushed. "I don't know what came over me."

"Lust mostly," Santana deadpanned.

"San!" Quinn pushed her slightly for lowering the tone of the conversation in front of Beth.

Shelby was chuckling. "It was pretty funny, though I was a bit worried when you let go of me to grab onto Rachel. I thought you were going to crumple to the floor."

"She nearly did, I'll have bruises on my shoulder tomorrow as a result," San huffed.

"Let me see," Quinn looked a little worried. San ducked her shoulder forwards and pulled back her collar to reveal a red mark. "Oops!"

"S'alright, Q. I'll live. It was worth it to see Rach's face."

The others all laughed at that. "Speak of the devil," Carmen nodded across the stage where Rachel half walked and half ran towards them. She hugged each in turn, but saved Quinn for last, the blonde girl handing Beth off to Shelby before Rachel dropped into her lap instead and they shared a massive hug and a chaste kiss.

"I cannot believe what you did earlier. You are completely insane at times, but I love you so much for it." Rachel spoke into her ear.

"I can't believe it either, but it was pretty funny by all accounts, especially the look on your face."

"Ms Berry," Rachel sort of froze and turned at the unmistakable sound of Carmen Tibideaux's voice called out.

"Madam Tibideaux?" She squeaked nervously and jumped to her feet.

"Congratulations on a fine performance this evening."

"Thank you," Rachel breathed deeply with relief. She was still a little scared of the older woman.

"I must say you seemed to convey an extraordinary amount of emotion in what were inspired song choices."

"That's really very kind of you to say. Madam Tibideaux, can I introduce you to my mother, Shelby Corcoran."

Shelby held out her hand and the two shook firmly. "Pleased to meet you."

"Likewise, but I seem to recall your name from somewhere. Were you a performer as well?"

Shelby smiled and nodded, "Way back."

"Well you can be very proud of your daughter, she has an excellent voice."

"Madam Tibideaux, this is Quinn, my girlfriend."

Quinn blushed a little.

"Ah, the muse perhaps?" The older woman smiled.

"I doubt that, but thanks I guess," Quinn raised her eyebrow and held out a hand.

"Can I take it that your little stunt earlier was not exactly planned?"

A small ripple of chuckles rippled around the group. Quinn ducked her head. "Planned? No not really, in fact the word impromptu springs to mind."

"Impossible more like," San huffed again.

"Santana!" Rachel hissed.

Carmen Tibideaux gave the young blonde a smile. "It was very nice to meet you all, thank you for coming to the show. Ms Berry, I would like to see you in my office on Monday morning."

"Of course, Madam Tibideaux. Thank you."

"Don't thank me; you don't know what I want to talk to you about yet."

Monday morning saw Rachel entering NYADA's main building and immediately seeking out Carmen Tibideaux. The older woman peered over her glasses and pointed to a seat in front of her desk.

"Good morning Madam Tibideaux."

"Good morning," the gravelly voice replied. A moment of silence enveloped the room.

"Have I don't something wrong or offended you in any way, Ma'am? I can be somewhat annoying at times and I am not always aware of when I grate on people's nerves. In fact most of my friends tell me I talk too much, especially when I'm nervous and I confess that even though we speak fairly regularly, you do still make me nervous."

Carmen frowned and leaned back in her chair. The girl really did talk too much and she was annoying, but also quite brilliant, more so than she wanted to tell her just yet, in case she should decide to just leave NYADA without completing her degree.

"Ms Berry, you are not in trouble and you have not offended me."

"Oh good. I was worried that you might be a little annoyed after what happened at the end of the showcase, you know with Quinn. She just got a little carried away with the emotion of it and …" Rachel's voice just drifted off as she realized Carmen didn't have a problem with that, being that she was smiling at her.

"Rachel," it was the first time she had referred to the girl by her given name. "I do not have an issue with your girlfriend's reaction to your performance. Actually it was very sweet."

"I just wondered because not everyone is supportive of same sex relationships and I wondered perhaps if I had gone too far with what I said. I won't do it again, I promise."

"I have no issue with your relationship and it wasn't even what I was going to talk to you about, but as you brought it up, I was," she searched for the right term, "intrigued."

"By what?"

"Your little speech and then obviously what happened after you sang. Whatever it was that sparked the performance was certainly something that resonated in your voice and the way you performed."

Rachel sighed. She hadn't spoken to anyone at NYADA about what had happened to her the year before and she realized Quinn was right in that it wasn't healthy to avoid the subject entirely. "I was engaged to a boy in high school and I sang it for him in the regionals competition. We were supposed to get married after the competition that day. I wasn't lying when I said I was almost killed in a car accident. Quinn and I were on our way to the courthouse, we had to go back to her house on the way to get her bridesmaids dress. You see, she wasn't very supportive of the wedding, thinking we were too young and immature, which if course we were but we weren't mature enough to realize it." Rachel laughed at the irony of her own words. "Quinn got given back her spot on the cheerleading team that afternoon by the coach who had thrown her off the team for something, I forget what now. That made Quinn change her mind because she was happy and she thought I should be happy. It was a bit messy." Rachel scrunched up her nose as she thought about how complicated the whole thing sounded. Her face darkened a little as she prepared to say the next words. "On the way to the courthouse we approached an intersection and a truck failed to stop because the brakes failed and it smashed into the side of the car. Quinn got the worst of it, but we were both seriously injured."

Rachel looked up to find a sympathetic expression on the other woman's face.

"Anyway, we survived and I recovered within a few weeks. Quinn did as well, but as you saw on Friday, she was left paralyzed from an injury to her spinal cord. The accident changed everything for me. I suppose it made me grow up almost overnight and I realized that I had been rash to think my future lay wrapped up in a boy. We grew apart over the next few months as I recovered. Quinn and I just sort of grew closer from our shared experience and before I could fully grasp what was happening, my relationship with the boy ended and I came to New York. Quinn and I finally realized we were more than just friends over Thanksgiving and we've been together since then. I wanted to let her know how I felt about her."

"It was certainly emotional," Carmen responded.

"She sort of brings out the best in me."

"I agree, but I think you are at your best on stage and I wanted to mention the performance because if you can channel that emotion the next time you perform, you have a shot at this," Carmen slid a sheet of paper across the desk for Rachel.

The petite brunette took it and looked over the details. She sighed heavily. This was going to be a discussion she needed to have with Quinn.

"Hey," Rachel gave Quinn a sheepish smile as the blonde opened her door to let her in. Rachel leaned in for a kiss.

"Hey yourself. I wasn't expecting you today, so I kind of ate already, sorry."

Rachel followed her into the room. "Don't worry, I have work to do but I needed to come and talk to you about something."

Quinn stopped and turned, sensing something was off with Rachel. "What's matter?"

Rachel moved over to sit on the bed and waved Quinn over to her. "I went to see Carmen Tibideaux today."

"Ohhhh." Quinn blushed. "Did my little stunt get you in trouble?"

"No, not at all. She was just sort of curious about the whole thing."

Quinn raised an eyebrow. "What did you tell her?"

"Just what happened to us, not too much detail, but I gave her the bare bones."

"Good, I'm glad you talked to her about it. I'm glad when you talk to anyone about it to be honest. I know you find it hard."

Rachel took out the paper she had stashed in her purse. "She actually wanted to tell me about this," she held it out to Quinn who took it and opened it up.

Quinn's eyes flicked across the page and her face broke into a smile, but as she read further the smile faded. Rachel hadn't wanted to see that, but it was kind of inevitable. She watched as Quinn folded it back up and handed it back to her. She watched as Quinn took a deep breath and forced the smile back on her face.

"I don't mind, honestly. I mean I will be disappointed to spend the summer without you, but you can't pass up on a chance to do this. This is Funny Girl, you were born to play Fanny."

"But what about our plans? I don't want to you to miss out either."

"They're just plans Rach, we can go another year. I hadn't booked anything yet."

"But it's not like I have a realistic chance of getting it, so maybe we can still go."

Quinn actually snorted. Like actually snorted. "Please, you'll be like it says in the letter, rehearsing all summer for the opening. I'll get to spend the summer in Lima with Mom, so it won't be so bad. Just promise me you'll come to the party and I can live with it."

Rachel's face fell. "Why?"

"Why come to the party?"

"No why spend all summer in Lima?"

"Well I kind of live there," Quinn replied as if the question was ridiculous. "Where else am I going to go, I love Santana but travelling without you would just feel wrong."

"No I mean why not stay here?"

"Because they don't let you stay in the holidays," Quinn was a little confused.

"I don't mean here in the dorm, I mean here with me. Why don't you just move in with us anyway?"

Quinn shrugged. "I just thought it would be easier to continue to live here next year."

"But we spend more of our time together at my place than we do here and the buses aren't so bad now that you're used to them, so move in straight away and we can have the summer together if I get the part and if I don't, maybe we can still do some travelling."

"Maybe, but the buses are a pain. I thought that I might bring the car next year to make life easier. I figured I could leave it at yours because there's parking. Are you sure about moving in? I mean, living together is a big step. Are you ready for that? What about Kurt and Santana as well, you better ask them too."

"They love you almost as much as I do and we have plenty of space, the place is practically a barn. Plus I'll ask the landlord about a few changes to make things better, I know the bathroom isn't as accessible as it could be."

Quinn nodded. "It makes it easier to know that even if we don't get to travel this summer, at least we still get to spend time together. I can help you learn your lines."

"What will you do if I get it? I don't want you to be bored."

"I won't be. I have an idea and I can go swimming every day, get the groceries in, do some cooking with everyone else out of the way."

Rachel grinned. "Do you have work to do this evening?"

"A little, but nothing massively important. Why do you ask?"

"Well, I was wondering if there was any point in delaying your moving in. We could just pack everything up and get a cab over to mine."

"Rach, I think you have had too much sun or something. I'll need time to get everything sorted and besides, I have classes tomorrow."

"Come on, it's still early. It won't take long to pack your things up." Rachel had a needy pout on her face.

"I tell you what, how about I pack some things to leave at yours for now and then I can pack up later in the week and bring everything over at the weekend. I still have things I need to do here this week."

"Okay, that sounds like a good idea." Rachel grinned. "I can't wait for us to be together all the time."

Quinn returned the smile. There was a hint of disappointment that her plans for travelling had suffered a little blow, but Rachel's happiness outweighed that by miles. Despite having lived in the city for nine months, there were still lots of things she hadn't done or seen and so Quinn decided that if a vacation wasn't possible, a staycation was on the cards and she would get planning for that eventuality. Let's face it, the chances of Rachel Berry not getting that part were smaller than her chances of jumping up out of her wheelchair and dancing a jig anytime soon.


	29. Chapter 29

A/N: So approaching the landmark thirty chapters and getting a little close to running out of chapters that are already written. Thanks for the awesome feedback and please keep the suggestions coming in, though I have to say, Santana and Brittany are not going to be getting back together in this story - sorry to disappoint all those Brittana fans out there, i empathise but my version of events has given the characters a more mature approach to life as they grow up and i always feel as though Santana and Brittany's relationship was quite immature. i think Santana needs someone who is her equal in terms of intellect and also be prepared to challenge her when she is out of line. Not that i am painting Brittany in a bad light here at all, she has her own kind of genius.

Some minor spoilers for season 5 in here but not many as we only had 3 episodes.

Disclaimer: Fox owns Glee, not me!

Chapter 29

Quinn's final rehearsal for the theater group's summer review show went well. Rachel had been banned from all of them this time and the anticipation on the brunette's part was palpable. Santana had managed to switch shifts with one of the other performers so she could come with Julia and some of her friends from Lima had turned up to watch, including Artie, who was there to scope out the city before he came to college in Brooklyn the following fall. Quinn had been open mouthed to find that Kitty was in tow with Artie and that they were officially a couple now. Blaine was also in town, his misdemeanor finally forgiven, sealing his status once more as Kurt's boyfriend. Brit and Sam were also there, finally accepted by Santana. The biggest surprise though was that Mercedes and Puck also arrived the day before much to Quinn's delight and she gave Rachel a mean stare for not letting on that they would be there. Puck's face was a picture the following evening as they all met up before the performance in Quinn's now rather empty dorm room and Shelby arrived with Beth. The reunion could have been somewhat embarrassing but Puck was so taken with the little girl that thankfully for Shelby, he paid her very little attention.

The theatre group had several individual performances from the talented students, including monologues, comedy sketches, singing and dancing. They also had two group performances, one being a rendition of Queen's classic anthem, _We Will Rock You_, which opened the show and Fun's _We Are Young_ to end it. Both were choreographed and with the blonde better able to control her chair, as well as some advice from Artie to the choreographer, Quinn's dance moves were now pretty fluent and certainly confident in comparison to the last time she had danced on stage.

When Quinn's individual performance was announced, there was a massive cheer from her friends in the crowd, both old and new as the crowd from her dorm had turned up as well as many of her class mates. As the cheer went up, Quinn rolled out across the darkened stage to take up her place at the mike. She wore a simple, figure-hugging, short white dress which flattered her hugely.

She spoke only five simple words before the music started and she sang the Celine Dion number she had been working on for ages.

"This is for you, Rach."

_I figured it out_

_ I was high and low and everything in between_

_ I was wicked and wild, baby, you know what I mean_

_ Till there was you, yeah, you_

_ Something went wrong_

_ I made a deal with the devil for an empty I.O.U._

_ Been to hell and back, but an angel was looking through_

_ It was you, yeah, you_

_ It's all because of you_

_ You are the reason_

_ You are the reason I wake up every day_

_ And sleep through the night_

_ You are the reason, the reason_

_ In the middle of the night_

_ I'm going down 'cause I adore you_

_ I want to floor you_

_ I'm giving it up_

_ No more running around spinning my wheel_

At this point, Quinn couldn't resist the urge to entertain and tilted her chair onto the left wheels to balance for a couple of seconds so she could flick the right, making it spin in the air momentarily. She heard the laughing from the audience as she bounced back down again.

_You came out of my dream and made it real_

_ I know what I feel_

_ It's you_

_ It's all because of you_

_ You are the reason_

_ You are the reason I wake up every day_

_ And sleep through the night_

_ You are the reason, the reason_

_ In the middle of the night_

_ I'm going down 'cause I want you_

_ I want to touch you_

_ I want to floor you_

_ You are the reason, baby_

_ You are the reason_

_ You are the reason I wake up every day_

_ And sleep through the night_

_ You are the reason, the reason_

As she finished there was another roar from the audience and she saw her friends on their feet cheering and clapping for her. She met chocolate brown eyes and took a deep breath to settle herself and enjoy the moment; the smile which spread across her face could have lit up the whole of New York City.

"Oh my God! You were awesome," squeals of delight met the blonde girl as she met her friends outside the theater after the performance was over.

Quinn enjoyed the praise because it was genuine. She thanked everyone for coming and supporting them. Rachel touched her forehead to Quinn's and they shared a quick kiss, before inviting everyone back to the dorm for a celebration. The group walked the short distance back down Broadway to the place Quinn had called home for the past nine months. She was about to spend her last few hours there before finally moving out. It had been quite a journey. When she had first arrived, she had done so still full of doubt about herself. She had wondered if she would ever feel normal again or if anyone would want to know her. She had wondered if she would be judged on past mistakes and had worried about revealing details about her life before. She had doubted her ability to get up on stage and perform and she had sunk into the mindset that she was unworthy of love.

She was allowed to speed up the ramp ahead of everyone else and at the top insisted on holding the door open for everyone of her friends to pass through. She had a quirky look from Kurt. "This is to pay everyone back for all the times they held the door for me this year," she explained as he leaned and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

Kurt spoke quietly into her ear. "Santana's right you know, when she leans in thinking no one else can hear and says you're awesome."

People were spread everywhere on Quinn's floor, in the hallway, kitchen and common room. She was hoping to chat to Artie, but wherever he went, it seemed Kitty was in tow and Quinn was dubious about the girl still. She waited patiently for Sam to finish telling her all about Brit's interview at MIT and then went in search of her paraplegic friend.

Passing Santana in the hallway she asked if she knew his whereabouts.

"Last I saw he was in your room with his hand up the plastic Cheerio's skirt."

Quinn shuddered at the thought but continued on to try and find him. She peered into her room and saw Rachel and Julia sitting on her bed talking to Puck, who was sat on the floor against the wall, beer in hand as always.

"Anyone know where Artie is?"

"I think he might have gone outside for some fresh air," Julia replied.

Quinn went to the door, opened it partway and peered out. She saw Artie sitting alone at the bottom of the ramp. "Hey," she called out to him. He looked up and gave her a wave. Pushing through the door, she rolled down the ramp and gave him a high five.

"Hi Quinn."

The blonde turned and found Kitty sat down on the sidewalk with her back to the ramp in such a way that Quinn hadn't been able to see her from the door.

"Hi, Kitty. I didn't realize you were down there, sorry."

"No problem. We were just getting a bit claustrophobic inside."

"I loved your performance Quinn and kudos on the dancing by the way, very smooth." Artie's big smile broke out from the peaceful expression he had been wearing moments before.

Quinn gave him a warm smile. "Thanks in no small part to you."

"I remember your first moments in the chair," he looked down for a second and then met her gaze expecting to see tears or sadness but there was no sign of either, she just nodded. "You've come a long way in a short time."

"Thanks, coming from you that means a lot. You must be excited about college. It's going to be great having you so close by."

"I confess to being a little nervous about it. I was even making excuses not to go at one point."

"It's okay, I set him straight," Kitty piped up. "I grassed on him to his Mom."

Quinn turned and looked at the girl she had wanted to punch earlier in the year and looked at the expression on her face. In the school of thought that it takes one to know one, Quinn got the feeling that perhaps something had changed in the sophomore's attitude.

"What happened?" The former Cheerio asked the current one.

"Arthur told us he wasn't going to go because his Mom was too overprotective, but that didn't fit with how he has always spoken about his parents and how supportive they have been to him sending him to a regular high school and everything, so I thought something was off and I accompanied him home one day after school to confront him with his Mom."

"I fessed up that it was me having doubts not my Mom." Artie blushed a little.

"What did your Mom say?"

"She was understanding but also encouraged me to be independent. Kitty also reminded me that I had no excuses because you had managed to leave home having spent much less time in a chair."

Quinn titled her head towards Kitty. "You told him that?"

Kitty was the one who blushed now. "I might be younger that everyone else in Glee but I'm not stupid. Your little talk back in the fall hit home. I wasn't lying when I said I admired you. Coach Sylvester always talks about you and how most of us will never be anywhere near as good as you. She pretty much worships you so if you tell me something, I'm going to listen. I thought I had to be a manipulative bitch to get by but you assured me that there was a better way. I decided I should start by being a better friend and you were right about how tolerant Glee Club members were. Arthur was sweet to me even after I was awful to Marley and he told me more about you and the things you went through but how you changed and made amends. I decided I needed to emulate you and be inspiring rather than spiteful."

"We got together a few weeks ago," Artie gazed at his girlfriend, who stood and moved over to sit on his lap so they could share a hug.

"And everyone in school knows about it now?" Quinn asked, surprised that someone like Kitty would agree to that. She knew what was expected of the cheerleaders.

"I was reluctant at first because I wasn't sure about how he felt and how I felt about him. Once I realized how much I liked Arthur, I was happy to have everyone else know."

"Any fallout?"

"Some, from the other cheerleaders. The odd bitchy comment, but I kind of expected that. High school is pretty immature and everyone is afraid of what someone else thinks about them. I just decided I didn't care anymore."

"Good for you," Quinn nodded thoughtfully. "I'm glad you listened to me, but you shouldn't do that because you admire the person saying it, you should listen because it's the right thing to do. You know what, I got so many second chances in life that I figure you deserve one as well, so how about we start over Kitty?"

The other blonde nodded. "I'd like that," she replied with a genuine smile, taking Quinn's outstretched hand and shaking it.

"Enjoy watching the lights, I'm off to find my woman." Quinn spun her chair but then looked around at the younger couple. "I'm happy for the both of you."

Julia was awake early the next morning and kicked Santana out of her bed so they could go for a run. "Come on, move or we won't have time to go before we have to help Quinn move into yours.

"Urgh, why do you have to be so habitual on the weekends? One lie-in won't kill you." Santana groaned as Julia hit her with a pillow. "I guess that's a no to the lie-in then?"

"Get up."

Santana reluctantly rolled out of bed and got ready to run. She didn't mind it once they set off, it was more the idea of it she disliked. Quinn had always been the disciplinarian about training, not allowing any of them to slack off, no surprise there, so she had been less regimented about her training since the accident. Now she was getting back into the habit, it was surprisingly easy to keep pace.

They ran towards Riverside Park and though Julia was probably taking it a little easy, Santana wasn't struggling to keep up as she had just a few weeks earlier. They ran for almost an hour before returning to the dorm and bumped into Quinn and Rachel in the hallway. They were piling up bags and boxes outside. Rachel had asked Shelby to help out with her car and a taxi would take care of the rest.

"We'll take a quick shower and be right with you," Julia mentioned as they passed by.

"You can use my shower to save time if you want San, we're pretty much done. We'll wait in the kitchen and make coffee."

"Thanks," Santana headed to get her towel from Julia's room and then trailed back to Quinn's moments later. She actually liked showering in Quinn's room, it had tons of space. She was in and out in no time and dressed quickly so she could help load up the car.

Coffee was thrown down quickly and Santana offered to go in the car with Shelby as it was pretty much loaded to the brim. Quinn and Rachel went in the taxi with Beth and two wheelchairs. At the other end Kurt and Blaine were instantly on hand to trek up to the apartment with everything.

Once Quinn's belongings had been squared away, they sat down for brunch, which Blaine had organized, before Shelby left with Beth, who was going to a birthday party later that afternoon. Quinn got down to organizing her things, leaving the rest to get on with their Saturday. As Santana went to get her laundry, Kurt handed over her mail.

Santana scanned through the three items which were of no interest and got to the last two. One was stamped Columbia University and the other was from The New School. She tore open the first.

"I got in," she muttered. "I got in!" She yelled the second time as if she hadn't believed it the first.

The rest of them gathered to watch as she opened the second letter. She grinned, revealing it was also good news. "I can't believe I have to choose now. I totally didn't expect to get an offer from Columbia." They mobbed her with congratulations and hugs.

"So which one?" Quinn had her own opinion but didn't want to color the internal argument she suspected Santana was having with herself. Both were good schools and both had courses that she liked, but which would win out?

"I think I like Columbia and it's such a good school that it seems a little crazy to turn it down but I think I like the course better at the New School."

"What are you going to study? Blaine was curious.

"I think I am going to do the Fine Arts degree in drama and photography. If I can't make a career in front of the camera I have a back-up plan behind the camera."

The school year drew to a close shortly a couple of weeks later and Rachel went for her first audition for Funny Girl. She found out she was by far the youngest and least experienced of those in the dressing room,though none looked older than their mid-twenties, as she waited to be called. Most of the others were at least studying for their master's degree rather than being first year undergraduates. She didn't let it bother her though and followed the advice offered by avoiding a song from the show itself. She felt it went well, but the director didn't look too convinced as she left the stage and she wondered if as she had thought a hundred times before this moment that she was simply too young for them to see past that and look at her talent alone.

She put it behind her as Quinn's party plans resulted in travelling back to Lima for her and her friends. They all met the day before in the Lima Bean for coffee to catch up on the latest news. Every member of the Glee club was there with the exception of Finn, who was still overseas. It was nice for them all to catch up before the party the following evening.

Artie had done an excellent job of hooking up a giant screen in the gymnasium and it started out being used to project photos of all her friends through high school and some since then as well. As the pictures scrolled round to background music, Quinn declared herself happy to Artie. The decorations had been courtesy of Brittany, Sam and Blaine aided by the Mr Berry's. Judy had organized the food and Rachel had been in touch with everyone about singing their favorite Glee songs throughout the evening so Mr Schue could prep the band.

There was a steady stream of guests arriving throughout the hour before it was due to start, most came early to talk to Quinn and to see if they could help. The band was warming up and the current and former Glee students were warming up in the choir room. Quinn popped in briefly to see them and shared hugs all round. Everyone's extended families had been invited and they were keen to go out and perform songs that most had never actually sung before an audience.

Quinn rolled back out towards the gym, but she saw a light shining out into the hallway from Sue Sylvester's office. She cruised down towards the light and tapped on the door.

"Come!"

"Hey coach," she pushed past the door. "Working late?"

"Just finishing up my journal for the year." The tall blonde woman stood and moved around the desk towering over her former head cheerleader. "You're a sight for sore eyes." She leaned forwards and wrapped her arms around Quinn. Sue pulled a chair over and sat beside her.

"Thanks," Quinn gave her a smile. "How are things around here?"

"Well you know high school students don't change, they are still just as reprehensible and hormonal as ever. Don't even get me started on Will Schuester converting my best Cheerio into a sappy, love-struck mess who insists she is in love with Rollerboy and follows around after him everywhere!"

Quinn smiled again. "Kitty?"

Sue rolled her eyes a huffed.

"Funny, she's grown on me," the former prodigy replied.

"You've changed, Q."

"For the better?"

Sue eyed her but didn't respond. "I heard on the grapevine that you and the mother of mini-Babs have patched things up."

"We have. She's been great and I get to see Beth regularly. How's your little girl?" Quinn was extra careful to keep a sympathetic tone from creeping into her voice?"

"Delightful, though I am not sure motherhood has changed me any. I'm still a cantankerous bully around here."

"Yeah, I know. Becky Jackson sends me messages on Facebook telling me how awful you are." Quinn gave Sue the raised eyebrow that told her former mentor she knew exactly how awful she had been lately. "I was surprised to see you back after the incident with the gun."

"Well, Becky couldn't keep quiet about it and told Figgins so I was reinstated. Again."

Quinn chuckled. "You have more than nine lives, Coach."

"You could well be right," she nodded. "I hear things have gone well for you in the Big Apple. Word gets back, mostly courtesy of Wheels. I know you and he have bonded."

"You're so diplomatic. But yeah I had a good year."

"I was thinking about something and I'm not sure how much you have thought about this, but I asked Roz 'Helmet Hair' Washington, about this swimming thing you have going and she thought you might have a shot at the Paralympics."

"What?"

Sue nodded. "I got hold of your times and checked. You have almost reached the qualifying time for fifty freestyle. That's if I got the classification thing right, I wasn't too certain about all of that so just guessed."

"How did you get hold of that information?" Quinn was surprised and then not surprised. This was Sue Sylvester after all. "My coach hasn't said anything about it to me, but I guess I was a bit preoccupied at the end of the season to even think about it."

"Your big starring role was also a success, I gather?"

"It was considering how inexperienced I am at all this."

"I told you, you are destined to go far, Kiddo."

Quinn smiled again. She used to live in fear of entering this office most of the time.

"Thanks. I couldn't have done it without your help. It was your discipline which gave me the skills to train successfully and I've put it to good practice this year. I'll talk to my coach about the times and see what she says. You are coming to the party right?"

"Wouldn't miss it for the world, Q."


	30. Chapter 30

A/N: Chapter 30 is finally up - sorry i was away for a few days and couldn't update. Hope you are still enjoying it. I have another few chapters finished as well, though i am struggling with chapter 34, not really flowing like most of the others. Anyway, hope you enjoy this one. As always, feedback and ideas are always welcome.

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee

Chapter 30

"Where have you been?" Rachel was curious as she found Quinn out in the hallway, staring into space.

Quinn shook off her thoughts. "I was just talking to Sue, she was in her office and I saw the light on. I came out a moment ago and was thinking about the amount of time I spent here. It feels like ages ago and its only a year. So much has changed and yet it still looks the same." Quinn looked up to see a slightly perplexed Rachel looking at her. "Come on, let's get the party going. Is everyone important here yet?"

"Pretty much."

"Let's go then," Quinn held out a hand and Rachel tugged her along the smooth floor towards the gymnasium.

They entered and as others in the room noticed, they congregated around the young couple to say hello, share a hug and admire their appearance. Quinn wore a short silver dress and her hair had grown out a little, so it was swept up at the sides and was fastened with a barrette. Rachel had on a pale pink dress that same to just above her knees and showed off her shapely legs, elongated by the heels she sported. They both looked lovely according to everyone who approached.

Quinn looked over and saw Santana's parents chatting to Rachel's dads and Shelby. Judy was with Burt and Carole Hummel and Artie's parents. Quinn gave Rachel's hand a squeeze. "I'm just going to speak to Mom a second."

"I'll be with my Dad's."

Quinn left her for a moment or two and rolled gracefully up to her mother, who hadn't seen her since she had changed. Judy had her back to Quinn so she didn't see her daughter at first.

"Judy, I think you might want to turn around about now," Burt nodded over her shoulder.

She followed Burt's gaze and then her eyes dropped as she realized she was looking at head height rather than wheelchair height. As she saw her daughter, Judy placed a hand on her heart and she had to take a deep breath to stop herself crying.

"Oh Quinnie," she breathed. "You look amazing sweetheart."

Quinn blushed. "Mom!" They hugged and secretly she was loving that her mother thought she looked beautiful. It had been quite a while since her Mom had looked at her with quite so much pride. "Where's Frannie?"

"She's running a little late, you know the children," she shrugged as if that was explanation enough. "She's going to faint when she sees you."

"She's not lying, gorgeous," Burt leaned in and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

Quinn paused momentarily, not sure how Carole would react, but she found herself gripped in a hug before she could think about it. As they parted Quinn found the courage to do something she should have done a long time ago.

"Mrs Hudson-Hummel, I have never really apologized to you for lying about Finn being Beth's father. I told him, but I never had the courage to come and say it to you, especially after you were so kind to me when my father kicked me out. I am truly sorry for that. I can only say I was really scared to tell the truth even though that's a really lousy excuse."

"It's a long time ago Quinn. Water under the bridge." Carole gave her a soft smile. "You look beautiful by the way."

"Thanks. I get a bit self-conscious with my legs on show, but Kurt makes me get them out every once in a while." She rolled her eyes.

"That's my boy," Burt laughed.

"He's looking forward to spending time with you this summer I know," Quinn didn't broadcast Burt's illness but wanted him to know she was thinking about him.

"Thanks, Quinn. I had good news from the doctor a few weeks ago, so we are going to go on a little family vacation for a few days to celebrate."

"I'm glad to hear it. Kurt's been worried but I think he is more relieved than stressed now."

"Thanks for helping take care of him, we both appreciate how great you guys have been at keeping him sane."

"I'm not sure sane is a word I would associate with Kurt, but we've tried to reassure him and it seems to have helped. I'm just glad you're doing so well."

"I think we should say the same about you. We were worried about you last year, but you seem to have bounced back real well."

Quinn nodded and then felt an arm snake around her shoulders. "Hey Q," Santana came to drag her away. "My Mom and Pop want to see you and Mr Schue says to let you know everyone is here and the satellite is up, whatever that means."

"Excuse me a moment," Quinn said and rolled off with Santana dragging her away.

"What was that about a satellite?" Burt asked Judy, but got only a shrug in response.

Quinn moved from group to group. She was conscious of Rachel avoiding Carole, understandably but hoped the two might be able to have a conversation at some point. Everyone else seemed to be getting along fine. The newer kids in Glee performed a set of four songs for everyone and the eating and drinking got underway. The dance floor hadn't really warmed up yet as people were happy to stand and chat to each other to catch up on news from each of the families.

Quinn spied her niece and nephew running across the dance floor, followed closely by her sister calling them back, but little kids and dance floors are like magnets. She rolled over and gave her sister and Robert a big squeeze.

"So where is Beth? She's here right?"

Quinn nodded. "Come on, I'll introduce you." Quinn glanced around and found Santana swinging the blonde toddler around whilst Shelby watched on, laughing as always at the physicality displayed by the Hispanic girl towards her daughter. "Where's Mom?" She looked around and found Judy talking to Mercedes' Mom. "Go get her will you, I think she's avoiding out of guilt again." Quinn gave her sister a sad smile.

Frannie went over and spoke quietly to her mother, who nodded her head and followed Quinn.

The former cheerleader was talking to Shelby and the brunette looked over to where Quinn was pointing out her mother and elder sister. Shelby smiled and they walked towards each other.

"Mom, Frannie. I'd like you to meet Rachel's mother. Shelby this is my sister, Frannie and my Mom, Judy." The three looked slightly uncomfortable, but smiled pleasantly. "San, stop it, you'll make her sick!" Quinn called over to her best friend. Santana looked up and realized what was going down and brought the toddler over and dropped her unceremoniously in Quinn's lap.

"Sorry, she likes it and I get carried away. Total cheerleader in the making, Shelby," Santana shrugged.

Quinn heard her Mom gasp as she looked at the toddler sat in her daughter's lap. Beth looked up and came over all shy. She stood and buried her head in Quinn's neck.

"Are you going to say hello, Baby Bear?"

The curly head shook.

"She's not usually shy," Shelby muttered. "Just the opposite," she gave Judy a sympathetic glance.

"She's so like you, Quinn." Frannie thought Quinn had exaggerated the likeness, but she hadn't.

"Thank God she doesn't look like Puck!" Judy laughed at her younger daughter's injection of humor.

"She is beautiful," Judy nodded with a smile. "She reminds me of you at that age."

"So long as she doesn't act like me at fifteen, we'll be okay."

"Quinn, don't beat yourself up," Shelby reached over and gave her shoulder a reassuring rub. "You have no cause to do that."

Judy agreed. "Shelby is right, Quinnie. No one should be embarrassed about bringing this little bundle into the world. You know I wish I had done things differently when we found out and we can't go back and change it, but we can all move forwards instead and stop punishing ourselves."

"Well said, Mom," Frannie nodded.

Quinn gently rubbed Beth's back and encouraged her to turn round but she was pretending to be shy as toddlers often do. "Shelby, can you take her, I need to do something. Beth, go to Momma." She peeled the youngster off her and handed her over. Turning back to her Mom, Quinn held out her arms and they held each other for quite a while. She didn't cry but Judy did.

"I'll make you a deal, I'll stop beating myself up if you do too. I love you Mom and I'm proud of you for a lot of things, but especially being brave enough to kick him out of the house." She didn't even use the term father anymore, because she had to admit that he longer fit the description.

"I'll definitely try harder to do that. I'm so, so proud of you though. And Beth is beautiful, just like my daughter. I have been watching her since she came in; it was impossible to ignore who she was." Judy had whispered the last bit. "I just didn't dare intrude until you invited me to meet them."

They finally released each other and Frannie gave her a squeeze shortly after. Beth had finally turned around because Quinn seemed to be the center of attention. Santana had noted what was going on, but having drifted away slightly to yell at someone for something, just because she could, she drifted back sensing the atmosphere around her friend had gotten a little overwrought.

"Obviously it's 'hug Quinn' night so I'll join in just to be a good sport, it's not like I enjoy it or anything. Jeez woman, I've never met anyone who gets quite so many hugs, you think you would tire of it." Santana didn't just hug her, she actually grabbed her and dragged her upwards for a few moments, so Quinn was literally clinging onto her shoulders briefly.

"Seriously, San!" She muttered as the brunette dropped her back in the chair, pretending to put out, but secretly loving the mood was given an instant lift.

Everyone turned around as Beth giggled, pointed and said "Tana, silly!"

"Oh, now you want everyone to pay attention, Squirt." San reached in and tickled her ribs and pulled a funny face to make Beth laugh and the shyness was gone. Turning back to Quinn, Santana looked down and asked a question. "Aren't you supposed to be making some sort of speech yet? Look at the time."

Quinn pulled out her phone to check and realized it was time. "I need to find Artie, see you all later." She moved off quickly to find him, unsurprisingly, attached to Kitty. They both went off to organize the next part of the evening.

"Ladies and gentlemen," Quinn announced into the microphone. "If I could have everyone's attention for a few moments." She waited until everyone gathered closer to the stage. She smiled at the most important people in her life who seemed to push their way through to the front, except for Rachel who was over to one side on her own.

"Before I say anything emotional and forget, I have some thanks to make. Firstly to my Mom, the Mr Berry's, Mr Schuester, Artie, Brit, Blaine and Sam for getting everything ready for this evening. Also thanks to everyone who sent me photos for the screen; gotta love Facebook." She pointed up to the screen as a ripple of applause went round for those who had helped to put the event together. "I also want to thank a few other people, but I'll get to that in a moment. I hope you are all enjoying the evening. I decided that I really wanted to have a party for everyone back in the fall. Last year was such a dramatic one for all sort of reasons, but I suppose my brush with death ended up being so much of a distraction, that we never really had a chance to throw a big Glee party with everyone who was involved, so this is to redress the balance. We had graduation, but not everyone finished school at the same time, so we weren't all together. I also had some good news, I know you are probably aware of it, because it was in the local paper, but the settlement I received put an end to the worry of the accident and having moved on, I wanted to give everyone the thank you they deserved for helping me get through last year. For that we need one more person here tonight. Recent events would not have happened without his interference and although we can't physically get him here, we have been able to get in touch and set this up. Artie, time to do your technical genius thing," she motioned to the screen above and the photos vanished to reveal a familiar face. Courtesy of Skype, Finn's cheerful face appeared on screen.

The cheer that went up was huge as everyone in the room realized he could see them. Carole was happy crying almost instantly and Burt had his arm wrapped around her.

"Hey Finn," Quinn waved into the camera. "Everybody say Hi to our very own hero."

"Hi Quinn," he grinned back. "Hi everybody," Finn waved into his camera.

After a few minutes of trying to get the emotion to dissolve slightly, Quinn carried on her speech. "So now Finn is here, I get to thank him for his intervention where I didn't have the courage, and let Rachel know how I felt about her. I also get to thank LeRoy Berry for his help in ensuring I got a fair settlement after my accident. There are going to be a lot of thank you's," she apologized.

"I have here this evening the most important people and I am going to start with the Glee club. For an outrageous bunch of misfits that I used to hate, all I can say is they won me over because they are simply the bravest people I have ever met. Each of them took abuse from other students at this school and yet they never let it stop them from doing what they love and my respect for every member of this club is absolute. You all saved me from the depths of despair twice, once when I was pregnant and then last year after the accident and I know I have said thanks to you individually but not so much publically, so there you have it. I shouldn't single people out, but Rachel, Santana and Kurt continue to be my support team. They have been with me every metaphorical step of the way since we went to New York and of course, what would I have done without Artie who has taught me so much about living life in a wheelchair, note the emphasis on the word living," she laughed and blew Artie a kiss.

An enormous round of applause went up for those mentioned, who caught everyone's attention and pats on the back were received from those nearby.

"I cannot thank Mr Schue enough for bringing us all together and guiding us to success despite our own attempts to divert that sometimes. I also need to say a massive thanks to all our parents, long-suffering and much angst aside, we couldn't have achieved anything without you."

"Finally, I get to say that we are leaving the camera set up so you can talk to Finn and I hope you enjoy the rest of the evening. I might even dance later if you ask me nicely, though you might have to fight Rachel off first. Thanks again and have a great time."

Santana, Mercedes, Tina and Brittany came up to sing immediately after the speech and filled the dance floor with Raise Your Glass which pretty much set the tone for the rest of the night.

Later that evening, Rachel was sitting in Quinn's lap and the pair were talking to Santana. The band were taking a break and Santana was sat on the edge of the stage with her feet dangling off the edge. They were soon joined by Kurt and Blaine who had been the last to talk to Finn before he had to sign off and go on duty. Kurt slipped his arm through Santana's and sat beside her.

Quinn smiled and wrapped her arms around Rachel who turned and looked at her. "What just went through your mind?"

"I'm just in a really good place right now. Everyone had a good time because of me and I love that. I don't think that's ever happened to me before, I mean I don't think I ever did anything like that before and it feels good."

Rachel nodded. "I get it. You have developed a knack for making people happy."

"Yeah, Q. You're like all inspiring and shit now. Who would have thought that after Babygate?" Santana couldn't resist a little teasing.

Quinn rolled her eyes and sighed. "Seriously, why do I put up with you again? You're going to have to keep reminding me."

"Because I make you keep it real," she fake punched Quinn in the arm and then pretended it hurt. "Seriously, feel that," she nodded at Kurt who looked distastefully at Santana but Blaine gave Quinn's arm a squeeze.

"Oh my gosh, your arms are like rock, Quinn."

"What do you expect?" She shrugged and looked a little bemused. "Actually I wanted to ask you something," she addressed everyone. "I think I kind of want to go out to where the crash happened. I feel ready for it now where I couldn't do it before. Do you think any of you would be willing to go with me? I think I might need some moral support."

Rachel stiffened at the mention of it and Quinn knew it would be hard on her.

"You don't have to come with me if it's too hard," she whispered to her girlfriend.

Santana put her hand on Quinn's shoulder. "I'll go with you, but you better bring a big box of Kleenex because I think I'll probably go soft on you."

"I'll go too," Kurt said.

"Are you sure, I mean after what happened to your Mom. I wasn't sure if it was even right to ask."

"No I want to. I never had the chance with my Mom, so maybe it's a bit for her too." He felt Blaine's arm go round his shoulder.

Rachel sat quietly, thinking about it. "I don't want to go," she paused. "But I think maybe I should. If you can do it, I suppose I can as well."

"Are you sure?"

Rachel nodded. She felt vulnerable but wanted to be strong for Quinn. "Yeah, I'll go."

Judy drove because Quinn didn't know if she could hold it together long enough and feared she might just turn around and go back home. They picked up Santana, who sat beside Frannie in the back. At Rachel's they formed a convoy with LeRoy driving Rachel, Hiram, Kurt and Blaine.

The road looked the same to Quinn as they sped along. The only thing different was the time of year. It had still been cold in February, the last time she had been there. She remembered what she had been going to do, be Rachel's bridesmaid. It seemed ridiculous in the extreme that she had ever gone along with that, but she had been afraid to reveal who and what she was so instead of facing the truth, she had hidden and lied. She really wasn't the same person anymore.

Rachel sat between Kurt and Blaine in the back of the car. She would rather have been holding onto Quinn at the moment they turned onto the road, but swallowed the fear. Both the boys had their arms through hers and Kurt rubbed circles on the back of her hand to distract her. Rachel had been hiding from the emotion she felt about the accident and knew she was going to be a mess for a while after. She was sort of glad that she had a couple more days to get over it.

Pulling up near the intersection, everyone got out of the car. Quinn had a few moments to try and calm herself as she waited for Santana to push her chair round from the trunk. Slipping across into it, she felt a huge knot in her throat and could only squeak her thanks to her friend. She began pushing the wheels, but felt the chair move forwards on its own. Turning, she found Santana pushing without saying anything.

For once, Quinn didn't care. Her arms were like spaghetti at that moment anyway.

The group moved slowly towards the spot where it happened. Quinn was trying to work out in her head where it was, but she didn't really remember much so she was relying on Rachel to tell her. Rachel for her part was struggling already and her bottom lip was trembling. Kurt had hold of her hand and walked beside the diminutive brunette.

None of them were feeling brave or confident. Even though both girls had recovered, it was easy to go back to the hours immediately following and re-live the fear of not knowing whether they would live or die. The fact that either of them could have perished at that roadside was real and at the forefront of their minds.

Rachel pointed towards the center of the intersection and they all stopped. Traffic eased past them; it was pretty quiet as it had been that day.

Turning to look for Quinn, Rachel's face was suddenly falling and tears ran over her cheeks. San steered Quinn over quickly and they both buried their faces in each other's neck. It wasn't pretty to watch them both fall apart and the rest of the small group failed to keep tabs on their emotions either. Frannie and Judy collapsed into each other and LeRoy held onto Hiram who had his arm around his husband. Santana stood rooted to the spot, her hands clenched into fists so tightly that the knuckles turned white. Her inner soft spot was on show for all to see as the tears coursed down her face. She found Kurt beside her, handing her a tissue. She took it, looked at it for a moment and then grabbed him and hung on as if her life depended on it.

Blaine had tears in his eyes and shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other. He knew the girls less than everyone else and wondered why he was there for about the tenth time, but Kurt had wanted him to come and he would be seeing a lot of them for the next few years, so maybe it was better to be there so he understood why they were all so close.

Quinn was calmer and although Rachel was still sobbing on her, she realized she still didn't know what happened. "This is where we got hit?"

Rachel just nodded.

"Where did the truck come from?"

Rachel lifted her head and pointed up the small hill to their left. "It came this way, through the stop sign," she indicated the signpost on the other side of the road from where they were gathered. "We were driving along this way, don't you remember?"

"I remember driving but I still can't picture what happened." Quinn shook her head. "Where did we end up?"

Rachel turned and looked across the road. "We got hit here as we were halfway across and then I think we rolled across to here and ended up down there, in the ditch."

Quinn followed Rachel's directions. Everyone else was listening now as well. Hiram's face was ashen as he saw the distance Quinn's small car had been catapulted. "That's got to be fifty or sixty yards," he removed his glasses and wiped the tears from his eyes.

Judy walked to where Rachel pointed. "You finished up over here?" She looked down at the drainage ditch which was about eight feet deep.

Rachel pulled Quinn over to the edge. "The car was pointing up on the other side. I suppose we were lucky it finished back on the wheels instead of upside down."

"Were you still conscious while we were trapped in the car?"

"I think so … maybe some of the time. I remember looking over at you a lot and I remember praying that we would get out alive. I kept thinking that maybe the car might blow up and we'd be burned to death. The truck driver must have called the paramedics I think. I don't really know for sure though. I don't even know how long it was before they came, then they checked us both over and gave me painkillers, after that it's not too clear and I can't really remember too much else until I woke up in the hospital. I don't even know if they took you out before me."

"Thanks for telling me. I've wondered about it for so long. Now at least I can picture what happened in my head even if I don't really remember it."

They hugged again only this time without crying, just the occasional sniff. Judy came over and put her arms around them both and kissed the top of each of their heads, as she released them, the others each came and did the same. Everyone just wanted to make some sort of physical contact with the girls to just let them know how much they appreciated their survival.

They didn't spend much longer on the roadside, instead they got back in the cars and went to Breadstix for some lunch and to talk more.


	31. Chapter 31

A/N: Had some really great feedback - i'm guessing if you read this far, you must like it or you would have given up long before now. Hope this chapter goes down well. It's a little introspective. Enjoy and let me know what you think.

Disclaimer: Still not mine, just borrowed for my entertainment (and hopefully everyone else reading!)

Chapter 31

Quinn was sat on the sofa reading with her nephew when Rachel texted her.

_CALL ME WHEN U GET TIME_

"What's up?" Quinn spoke into the phone when Rachel picked up.

"Just wondered what you were doing today. My Dads were wondering if you wanted to come over for Sunday lunch."

"I'd love to but Frannie and the kids are heading home later today so we're having a family lunch today. You can come here if you want, we can always make room for one more, especially as you won't be eating all the meat." Quinn chuckled.

"What time are they leaving?"

"After we eat."

"Okay. I think I'll eat with my Dads and then I'll come over to see Frannie before she goes."

"Is everything okay?"

"Yes, of course. What makes you think otherwise?"

"Nothing, just checking." Quinn wondered if Rachel was telling the truth, but didn't want to talk about it on the phone. Maybe it was just the emotion of yesterday lingering. "I'll see you later."

Quinn was interrupted a little later by a surprise. Artie was in the hallway.

"Hey," he waved. "I'm not interrupting am I?"

"No," Quinn scooted her nephew off her knees and slid into her chair. "Let's go to my room, I want to ask you something actually."

His head turned to the side as it often did when his brain was working. "What's matter?"

"Maybe nothing," she shrugged as she lifted her feet into place and rolled towards her room. Artie trailed after her and closed the door behind him. "How did you get here?" Quinn realized he was on his own. "Did your Dad drop you off?"

A big grin spread across his face, his beautifully straight teeth gleamed at her. "No one brought me, I brought myself."

Quinn's eyebrow quirked. "It's quite a long way."

"I didn't walk, or roll, whatever. I drove!" His hands clasped above his head in a victory salute.

"Oh my gosh! Artie that's awesome. You never even said you were learning." She rolled forward and gave him a high five.

"Well, I figured if you could do it, so could I. Besides, how else am I going to take Kitty out this summer? She's too young to drive still."

She shook her head. "Good ulterior motive."

"So what did you want to ask me?"

Quinn sighed. "I think I am being a bit irrational, but I might be having a crisis of confidence."

He looked bemused. She had seemed so self-assured. So much so of late that it had caught him out. She told him about the theater group and what Coach Sylvester had told her about the swimming and he had realized that Quinn had moved on massively from the previous summer when her injury had been so new and the doubt in her ability to cope had been obvious. He could even see it in her body, her arms and shoulders had filled out massively.

"I'm worried about Rachel."

"Is she alright?"

"I don't mean it like that, I mean I am worried about our relationship."

"Quinn, this seems a little left-field after everything I've seen of the two of you together."

"I know, but I'm worried about this Funny Girl thing. She doesn't think she has a chance and I'm pretty sure she does. Look at her, she's perfect for it and if she does, then she'll probably win awards, because, she's Rachel Berry for God's sake."

"Why is that a bad thing?"

"It's not, it's amazing and everything she wants, but when she becomes a big star and let's face it, she is going to be a big star, where does that leave me? I get the feeling that I am going to hold her back and then I'll become what I accused Finn of being; a burden, an anchor from the past, weighing her down."

"It's not the same thing," he reassured her. "Don't get me wrong, Finn is one of my best friends but their relationship was never on solid footing. You two are great together."

"But the way I see it, she's going to get in with all these celebrity types and she won't want me around then. She'll have people throwing themselves at her and meanwhile, I'll be sat on the sidelines, watching her." Quinn's gaze fell away; she couldn't look Artie in the eye at that moment.

"Do you still think that you are worthless?"

"No, I don't. But I don't know that I am cut out for the same lifestyle as Rach. Let's face it Artie, I am doing a good job of pretending I have a shot at becoming an actress, but in reality it's hard enough to get a break when you are able bodied. I don't want to sound miserable about the future, because I'm not, but I am wary about it and the settlement aside, I don't want to be a failed actress, I would rather be successful at something else where being in a chair won't hold me back. I'm just not sure that will be what Rachel expects of me." She finally looked up again. "I'm rambling I know. Spending too much time with Rachel Berry does that to you." She let out a frustrated puff of air. "Do you have doubts as well still?"

He looked sad for a moment. "Yes, of course. But everyone has doubts and I am sure that's not exclusive to us."

She bit chewed the inside of her lip for a moment. "Be honest, can you see me trailing after her up some red carpet at an awards ceremony?"

He smiled. "Honestly? I see it the other way around. I think you could be every bit as successful. You have a lot of people on your side from what I've seen and you have a way of getting people to listen to you. That's always been there, but you just didn't use it well to begin with. You have to believe that."

"Really?"

He nodded. "Besides, when I am a famous director, I'll cast you in all my films." He waved his hand dismissively.

She laughed at him. "Come on, heart-to-heart over. Show me your car."

"I will, but you have to have this conversation with Rachel as soon as you can. Promise you'll talk to her?"

"Okay, I promise."

Rachel sat on the edge of Quinn's bed. The blonde had insisted they talk and in truth Rachel felt a little something akin to nerves. Something was bothering Quinn and had been since the day before. Rachel had intended for them to spend the evening together and even stay over, but Quinn had wanted some time to herself. She had thought her girlfriend might need some time to get over the visit to the accident site, but now she wasn't so sure.

Frannie, Robert and the kids had just been waved off and Judy was going to spend the afternoon with a friend so they had some privacy. Quinn got them both a glass of water and rolled back into her room with the glasses wedged between her knees, careful to avoid bumping into anything and spilling any. She held Rachel's drink out for her.

"I could have got these," the brunette commented, recognizing it was a little awkward for Quinn to carry drinks.

"Why? I managed without spilling any."

"Sorry, I wasn't suggesting you couldn't do it, just that it would have … never mind," Rachel pasted on a smile. "I wanted to ask you if you want me to come with you tomorrow to your doctor's appointment. I heard your Mom say she was working."

Quinn shrugged. "I don't mind you being there if you have nothing better to do." She took a mouthful of water. A funny feeling was creeping into her. She hadn't behaved like this in a while and she didn't like it, but somehow couldn't stop herself.

"Quinn? What's wrong? You were a bit off on the phone earlier and now you are being dismissive and frankly there's something in your voice that I haven't heard since …." Rachel stopped mid-sentence.

"Before. That's what you were going to say. I haven't spoken to you like that since before the accident. When I was still a first class bitch."

Rachel's face fell and her nose wrinkled at the thought of the old Quinn back when they were Sophomores. "Sorry, I'm just confused. What's happened since yesterday. When we parted, you were fine and now something is clearly annoying you and I can't think what I've done wrong."

"Don't keep apologizing. Who says you have done anything?"

"Well I have a habit of annoying people and you in particular in the past so I automatically assumed I must have inadvertently done something."

"You haven't done anything. I just had a little time to think yesterday evening and I have been having a little meltdown since then. Artie came over this morning and I talked to him and he said I had to speak to you about it. I'm just worried that you aren't going to like what I say."

"Oh my God, please tell me you aren't breaking up with me. Quinn I swear I don't know what's wrong but please don't …"

"Rach, stop!" Quinn puffed air from her lips. "I'm not breaking up with you, I just needed to tell you what I was feeling. God, you're hard work sometimes. I am trying to be more open with how I feel so just be patient, I don't find this easy."

Rachel placed a hand on her heart and took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, I just panicked for a moment. Please carry on."

"I don't know why, but yesterday evening I was thinking about going back to New York with you on Tuesday and that you will probably be getting a call-back from the producer of Funny Girl over the next couple of days. That made me realize that it's all coming true, everything that you wanted is going to happen, I know you don't think so, but I know so. I got an attack of nerves that you would probably get awards, I can see it now, for best newcomer in a Broadway show or something like that and then your career will take off, whereas I will be stuck auditioning for scraps."

"No, it won't be like that, honestly. I believe in you every bit as much as you believe in me." Rachel reached out and took Quinn's hand in hers.

"You'll have celebrity magazines after you for interviews and I was worried that I would turn into Finn and just hold you back. I know you told me before that you didn't care, but that was when it was still a dream and now it's going to be a reality. Why would you want to drag me along to some fancy awards show when you could have someone perfect dripping from your arm instead?"

Rachel's head jerked upwards and her eyes narrowed. She shook her head slowly. "I won't listen to this anymore. We are nineteen, Quinn. Both of us have our whole lives ahead of us and as far as I am concerned that life will be beside you, not pushing you from behind or dragging you from in front, I want to be next to you."

"But .. "

"No buts. If I make it big and get to walk up a red carpet at some awards ceremony, I'll have you next to me and I'll be the proudest person there because of it, not in spite of it. You say that I could have someone perfect, well wouldn't Santana fit that bill?"

"I guess," Quinn looked bemused.

"Would Finn?"

"That I'm not so sure about."

"But Finn can walk and he's nice, same for Santana, though who would have thought I would be saying that after our history and of course there's Brody who is always chasing around after me at NYADA, plus a few others."

"What's your point?"

"I chose you. I still choose you. I chose you over other people who are attractive, nice and can walk. Even if by some quirk of fate, I get to star in Funny Girl, and if I do a great job and win an award, I'm not going to change into someone else."

"How do you know that though? How can you be so certain?"

"Because I have been certain of who I am since I was five."

And there it was. All Quinn needed to know. Rachel was just what she said she was. She had always been who she said she was and nothing anyone had ever done or said to her had ever changed that. If Rachel said something, it was because it was the truth as she knew it.

Quinn sighed and her shoulders slumped. "Are you mad at me?"

"Of course not. I understand what it feels like to be insecure in a relationship. Do you think I'm the only person interested in you? Because I'm not you know. I know for a fact that there are quite a few of your classmates who look at you with what I can only describe as yearning. I spoke to Marcus when the two of you were rehearsing one evening and he told me how half the guys the theater group had to take cold showers after you sang in the review show last fall. You don't get the monopoly on insecurity just because of your disability."

"I don't really fancy any of them anyway," Quinn tried to look serious for a moment and then struggled to keep the corner of her mouth from turning up.

Rachel slapped her gently on the arm. "Quinn Fabray!"

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for getting all riled up over nothing and spoiling your afternoon as well. I guess it was just all that stuff yesterday, reliving it again and dredging up the negative emotions. It made me a little melancholy and then I started thinking, or over-thinking and …"

"You really have spent too much time with me," Rachel laughed. "I love you, every bit of you and if you can't see that, it's not your legs you need to worry about it's your eyesight."

It was Quinn's turn to laugh now. "Maybe I need new contacts," she shrugged.

A few minutes later, Quinn lay on her side, propped up on her elbow and facing Rachel who was stretched out on the bed; the wheelchair sat empty beside them.

"I know you said you chose me, but why? I need to hear you tell me again, just to beat off my demonic insecurity."

Rachel stroked a few strands of blonde hair behind Quinn's ear. "I chose you because you're beautiful. You are witty and intelligent and I find that very attractive. You are strong in so many ways; the list is a long one. Your voice is dreamy and I love to just hear you talking, it makes me all tingly inside."

"Tingly?"

"Tingly!" Rachel's eyes widened.

"Oh."

"And don't take this the wrong way, because honestly I would give anything for you not to have been hurt, but there is something indescribably brilliant about you that just wasn't obvious before your injury. I don't know if it's just that you were put to the test and not found wanting or how much you work for what you want and I hadn't ever really noticed it before, which I should have; you got accepted to Yale after all. Maybe it's the way you bounced back and seem unstoppable even though I know you are scared sometimes. Maybe its just that you really are unique; there's no one else like you."

"What did you just say, because I was still fixed on the fact that my voice makes you tingly," Quinn's eyebrows rose mischievously.

Rachel smiled. "The now famous wit, I see."

"Thank you for saying all that. I know I keep having these moments where I just lose my confidence from time to time. I don't have a bullet-proof sense of self the same way you do. But one thing I want you to know is that if it had been you that was stuck in the chair and I'd come out okay, I would still feel the same about you. I wouldn't have run off. I really mean that. I would still have loved you the same as I did before. Just in case you had ever wondered about that."

A tear ran from Rachel's eye and she quickly swiped at it because she wasn't sad and she didn't want Quinn to think that. "Thank you, that means a lot."

"I'm glad it was me though, if I had to be one of us. I would hate myself if it had been you."

"Oh Quinn, no." Rachel placed a finger on her girlfriend's lips. "Don't say things like that. Why would you hate yourself? It was an accident, we've been over this so many times. Accidents happen. I was thinking yesterday how lucky we were when I saw where it happened. It was playing over and over in my head and there was nothing that we did wrong, nothing that we could have done to prevent it. If it had been me, I would just hope that I could have carried on the way you have. It's been a privilege to see you grow this year and I love you so very much."

Rachel glanced at her finger, which was still pressing against Quinn's soft pink lips and realized it was wet. Tears had run down the side of Quinn's nose and dripped onto her finger.

"So much for promising to cry less," Quinn sniffed but with a smile on her face.

"Are you okay now?"

Quinn nodded. "You?"

Rachel nodded. "Will you let me come with you tomorrow?"

"Please, if you don't mind."

Rachel shook her head. "Why would I mind? I love you more than anything."

"Not more than I love you."

"I so do," Rachel laughed.

"Do not," Quinn replied.

They carried on with that for quite some time.

"Dr Myers will see you now," the nurse held the door for Quinn to go through and Rachel followed.

The doctor left her seat and came around the desk to shake hands with them both. "How are you, Quinn?"

"Good, thanks. How are you?"

"I'm just fine."

"This is Rachel, my girlfriend," Quinn nodded.

"Pull up a chair, Rachel. I see you brought your own as usual," she grinned at Quinn.

"That's a good one, doc." The blonde gave the doctor a cheeky grin. "Do you use that on all your paralyzed patients."

"Oh no, only the special ones. So anything I need to know about before we do some routine checks?"

"I don't think so. I wanted to talk to you about my meds, but that can wait."

"Okay, let's just go through the usuals first. What are we at now?" The doctor seemed to be asking herself as she checked the notes in front of her. "Sixteen months post-injury, so how about pain? Manageable or a problem?"

"Manageable, occasionally I have to resort to the stronger meds, but usually I can cope with just regular over-the-counter stuff."

"Are you routinely using painkillers or occasionally?"

"Occasionally. It's worse in the cold weather."

Dr Myers wrote some notes as she went. "Where is the pain when you get it?"

"Just around the injury site," Quinn was thoughtful. "I haven't had anything bad for quite a while though, I would say February was the last time I had to dose up for several days."

Rachel listened but didn't interfere.

"How much exercise are you getting?"

"I started swimming seriously in the fall and was going four times a week to training, plus competing once or twice a week, but the season ended in April so I have just being going occasionally since then. I intend to do more during the summer though."

"Okay, bladder next. Any signs of infection or bloody urine?"

"None at all," Quinn replied with a sigh of relief. "Thank goodness."

"You seem to be lucky there. How many times a day are you catheterizing?"

"Usually five, occasionally six if I have extra to drink."

"Alcohol consumption?"

A small grin appeared. "Occasionally I drink a glass of wine or an odd beer at home, strictly monitored. I honestly don't over-indulge. Both my parents have alcohol issues, I'm not going there."

"Glad to hear it. Bowels?"

"Every other day."

"Are you needing to use suppositories or managing without?"

"I have occasionally but normally it hasn't been necessary; I usually manage to manually evacuate." Quinn blushed at Rachel overhearing that.

"Any skin breakdowns?"

Quinn shook her head. "I check myself pretty thoroughly. I have had the odd occasion where my skin on my butt has been a bit red at the end of the day, but it seems to be fine the next morning."

"We might think about changing your seating. How has your appetite been?"

"Normal, I would say. I mean normal since the accident, I don't eat as much as I used to when I was cheerleading."

"That's not especially anything to worry about, but we'll weigh you and see if you're getting what you need. Any changes in sensation or function that you're noticed?"

"Not really. I can do more, but I think it's just strength that I've gained as well as figuring out how to do things for myself."

"That's what I would have expected. Let's get you on the table and take a look." Dr Myers pointed to the area behind the screen.

Quinn rolled over to the table. Rachel didn't know whether to stay or follow, but when she looked over at the blonde girl, she saw her motion with her head to tag along.

"Do you need help or can you manage? Let me just lower it to the same height as your chair." She pressed the controls until they were level and Quinn slid over. "I don't need you to undress completely but can you remove your jeans and shoes, please?"

Quinn unfastened her jeans and wriggled them down as far as her shins, then shoved her shoes off so she could pull them off the rest of the way. Rachel helpfully took the jeans and folded them, before placing them and the shoes neatly on the seat of the wheelchair.

"Okay. Can you lie back for me? I'll check sensation first. You know the drill, just a yes or no."

The doctor took her little hammer and then unscrewed the end of it to remove a pin. She pressed it gently on the soles of Quinn's feet in several places. "Anything?"

"Nope," Quinn shook her head.

The doctor carried on with the test all the way up Quinn's leg as far as her hips until finally Quinn nodded. "Yes."

"Blunt or sharp?"

"Sharp."

"Here?" the doctor moved a little lower towards the numbness.

"Blunt."

"Here?" she moved a little lower again.

"Nothing."

The doctor nodded briefly. "No real change there. Let's have a look at the back, can you roll over for me please?"

Quinn pushed herself into a sitting position and reached forwards to place her right leg over the left so she could roll to the side and not get her legs tangled. She flipped over, but her legs were still a little crooked. Rachel moved them straight, knowing Quinn wouldn't be able to now she was lying on her stomach.

The doctor continued the tests along the back of Quinn's legs but the same results came back again, no change.

"I'm just going to check the scar from your surgery Quinn, if that's okay."

"No problem," the blonde replied.

Rachel was used to seeing it, but the doctor didn't hold back from digging her fingers into the tissue. It had faded from the angry red line of a year ago to pale pink now, but it was still something that would cause some people to take a sharp intake of breath on seeing it. Rachel had the first time she had seen it. Still, it was like everything else that had been the aftermath of the accident. Eventually, you just got used to it.

"That's healed nicely. Have you been massaging it?"

Quinn shook her head. "It's hard to reach."

"Try a vitamin E cream on it. It seems to help with scars."

"I can do that if needed," Rachel chipped in.

The doctor finally examined the skin on the back of Quinn's thighs and nodded that everything was fine.

"Okay, let's have you get dressed again and then I'll get the nurse to take you to get weighed. I'll see you shortly back in here."

Rachel handed over the jeans and shoes after Quinn had rolled herself back over again. It only took a few minutes to dress and as they emerged from behind the privacy screen, the nurse was waiting.

Rachel wondered how they were going to weigh Quinn bearing in mind she couldn't just stand on scales like everyone else. Arriving outside another room, they were shown in and Quinn was asked to transfer onto a contraption with a white seat. The nurse placed her feet onto the rest beneath and then went to the back. She read off Quinn's weight and recorded it and then waited to ensure the blonde could get back into her wheelchair safely before they went back into the doctor's office.

"So let's have a look. One hundred and eight pounds. That's a little light, but considering your age and the loss of muscle mass in your legs, I'm not unhappy with that. You need to be careful to avoid dropping anymore weight though Quinn."

"I'm worried about gaining weight, actually paranoid is more accurate. I used to be chubby when I was younger."

"I don't think you need to worry about that right now. I'm going to recommend a new cushion for you. The one you have is okay but I think you could be better off with one which has a gel layer in it. If you phone the insurance company, they should be okay with it as you haven't had a replacement before now." Dr Myers wrote out the details for her and handed over the prescription. "I am happy with your chair for now if you are."

"I think so. It's pretty easy to get around in now."

"Just remember that new technologies are produced all the time, so keep an eye out for new ones which may suit you better in the future."

"I will," Quinn gave her a grateful smile. "Can I ask you about meds now?"

"Of course."

"I would like to review them all really, but especially the blood pressure ones, they affect my appetite. I also don't like the muscle relaxants I have for spasms, they make me a little tired for about an hour after I take them."

The doctor nodded and had a think for a moment or two. "How often are you able to stand?"

Quinn looked down. "Not often, the frame is here but I haven't been, so…" the sentence went unfinished.

"I know you are active so I'm going to suggest you have a reduced dose and that you need to have regular check-ups with a nurse for your condition to be monitored. If it's under control, we'll see about reducing some more, but honestly, don't get the idea in your head that you'll definitely get off them all. That's unlikely."

"What about the others?"

"You are aware that if you come off them, you are likely to have more spasms which can be uncomfortable and there is increased risk of your bladder letting go without warning."

Quinn sighed. "Can we do the same thing and reduce the dose to try it. I'm not going to be in classes for a while so it should be easier to manage. I don't really get them too often, just occasionally when I sit still for too long."

"Where are you going to be for the duration?"

"New York."

"Which medical center do you use?"

"Campus medical center usually for anything regular but I go to see my physical therapist at Mount Sinai."

"Where is the closest hospital?"

"Probably St Luke's, it's like right over the road from campus."

The doctor quickly drew up the internet and found it. She peered over her wire-rimmed glasses at the screen and then turned back to Quinn. "St Luke's belongs to Mount Sinai, I'm guessing your insurance is already cleared for there, so I think we'll give them a call and get you to visit for a check-up next week and I'll send them some notes and instructions. I'm a long way away if anything happens so I want someone supervising this. I'm not trying to get rid of you, but if you feel like you would rather have your condition monitored by someone in New York, I can arrange a transfer."

"Yeah but I would miss your jokes, doc," Quinn shrugged and then broke into a smile.

The middle-aged woman chuckled.

"I still visit pretty much every holiday so it's easy for the scheduled visits to come here, but I'm happy for someone at St Luke's to keep tabs on me. I'm not going to risk my health, but I'd love to have fewer meds every day."

"I understand and given your age and health, if we can get you off them now we will. I need you to be careful and let everyone you spend a lot of time with know what's going on, in case there are changes that you don't notice."

"Rachel and I have just moved in together, so she can keep an eye on me and we have two other roommates as well."

"We'll be vigilant in checking Quinn's health doesn't deteriorate," Rachel added and gave her arm a squeeze.

"You need to watch out for blood pressure issues, so fainting or even just feeling faint, nausea, vomiting, etc. These would require a visit to the nearest medical center. We'll also send you away with some large absorbent pads. It would be advisable to have one on the bed just in case your bladder has a spasm during the night. You might want to consider wearing protection during the day in the short term until we find out what happens. This is going to be a bit experimental Quinn, so prepare yourself for occasional accidents."

Quinn's face flushed a little with embarrassment. "I understand. I suppose it's better to prepare for it than have something happen when I'm out in public."

"Good," the doctor seemed happy with the arrangement. "I will get in touch with St Luke's, I am sure they will have a general practitioners office. Leave it with me and we'll sort it out."

Quinn made her way to the driver's side of the car and slid in. Rachel waited for the blonde to get her legs out of the frame and pop the trunk so she could stow the chair. A minute later, she dropped into the passenger seat.

"You were quiet in there," Quinn observed.

"I didn't want to interfere. I just wanted to be there for you."

"Are you going to be okay with this, because if not, I can forget it and just keep taking meds, or even stay here for a while until things are under control."

"Don't be silly. We'll manage and get through it. I just want what's best for you in the long run and if that means a few weeks of doctor's visits and changing the bed sheets more often, I can cope. You have to promise me not to hide things though. I know you and if you don't feel well, you'll have to let us know."

"I will, honestly. The last thing I want is getting rushed to the ER anytime soon."

Quinn started the car and set off. They had agreed to meet up with their friends for a final visit before heading back to the city the following day.

"I'm glad we have the whole day tomorrow. It's going to be a long drive. Do you think we should stop somewhere on the way and split the journey over two days. The last thing I want is to fall asleep behind the wheel and crash again."

Rachel grinned. "I doubt that will happen, because you don't have to drive the whole way."

"But Santana's meeting up with Joolz so she isn't coming back with us and Kurt's staying here."

"I have a surprise for you," Rachel blushed. "I passed my test last week."

"What?" Quinn glanced over for the briefest moment and then turned back to the road. "I didn't even know you had taken lessons."

"I've been having them for a while now. It was after you planned the road trip. I didn't want you and San to have to do all the driving, it wouldn't have been fair."

"Rachel Berry being sneaky, I never would have thought it possible," Quinn's face broke into a grin. "Congratulations, babe. Guess I better call the insurance company when we get back."

"You just called me babe." Rachel had a big smile. "You never called me anything like that before. I mean I only just got used to you calling me Rachel."

"It just popped out," Quinn shrugged. "I could go back to man-hands if you like?" Quinn's eyebrows rose questioningly.

"I kind of like it, but it means I'm going to have to find a term of endearment for you now as well."

"Now I'm worried," Quinn allowed a scared look to pass across her face, though obviously joking.

Arriving at the Lima Bean, Quinn pulled into the only empty handicapped parking space outside. "Artie's here already," she nodded to the car in the next space. "That's his new ride."

"Kurt's using Finn's truck, I saw it back there."

They got sorted and went inside to find most of their friends already there. Ordering drinks took Rachel a few minutes and Quinn had been happy to let her sort them out, choosing to go straight to talk to everyone else. She greeted them all and then fielded questions about why they were late.

"I had a doctor's appointment at the hospital," she replied nonchalantly.

"Are you okay?" Kurt asked, momentarily concerned.

"I'm all good. It was just a routine check-up. Actually I am doing really well so the doc is going to try help me get off some of my meds, or at least reduce how much I have to take. So when you get back to New York, you, San and Rach will all be part of 'Operation Quinnwatch'. I have to have babysitters." She had a self-depracating note in her voice.

"Don't forget Blaine, too. He's got a dorm room but I'm guessing he will stay with us before school starts.

"The apartment is going to be a bit full."

"Especially now San is together with Julia as well."

"Rachel is going to insist on a rota. I fully expect her to be stood outside the bathroom each morning with a stopwatch timing us all."

"What was that about a rota?" Rachel placed Quinn's raspberry tea down on the table. She looked from Quinn to Kurt and back again, but neither responded with words, instead they looked at each other and laughed apologetically.

"Busted!" Quinn admitted to Kurt, fiddling with the mug of tea while Rachel scowled at her in mock offence.


	32. Chapter 32

A/N: Here's the next chapter. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Glee does not belong to me, i'm just borrowing it!

Chapter 32

The drive back to New York had been largely uneventful, once they had actually gotten underway. Quinn didn't really want to take the standing frame with her, but it did come apart and they had room in the car with the back seats folded flat and Rachel hadn't let her find any reasonable excuses to leave it behind.

They had shared the driving, swapping over every hour or so. It had gone quickly, singing along to music and just talking about the things they wanted to do over the holidays. Rachel suggested lots of typical touristy things they hadn't gotten around to yet, feeling guilty about spoiling the plans for travelling further afield.

"We should definitely go on the Circle Line, I have wanted to do that for ages," she enthused. "The boat gets quite close to the Statue of Liberty I think."

Quinn nodded. "I'd like to see more of the museums too. I've only been to MoMA so far and Santana complained virtually the whole way round that she was bored."

Rachel laughed. "She has been such a good friend to both of us, I think we can forgive her that."

"You're right. I hope she's happy. She will never admit it, but I think Brit left her a bit heartbroken."

"More than a bit," Rachel sighed, "but she seems to get on well with Julia. I like her, she'll keep San in check and that's good because with Brit she was more like a parent at times and I think this relationship might be more equal."

"I hope so. You don't think I forced them together do you?"

"No I think they just might have needed a little gentle prod, but that's all. You did a good thing for Julia too, she seems more outgoing now, where she was a bit reserved before. It feels a bit strange to think that a year ago Finn and I were just breaking up and I never would have thought I could love someone more, and yet I do, so I think there's hope for San, don't you?"

Quinn nodded thoughtfully. "There were times this year that I thought she would never really be happy again, but maybe she can be now. She seemed okay with Brit and Sam, though honestly I can't see them lasting the distance with Brit away at college."

"I really miss seeing her every day," Rachel mused.

"Me too. I still think its weird seeing her out of her Cheerios uniform. It's just how I picture her in my head."

Back at the apartment, Quinn made dinner from the groceries they had brought along while Rachel brought their luggage up. It took quite a while to get the various bits of the standing frame from the car to the elevator and then from the elevator to the apartment, with Quinn largely unable to move any of it. The bits were abandoned for the duration of eating dinner and a little while after. Quinn kept looking at it from the sofa where they sat comfortably until she couldn't put it off any longer.

"Come on let's get it together or my conscience is going to keep eating away at me."

Rachel smiled. "It can wait until tomorrow if you don't want to do it now."

"No, let's do it now and then I can get in tomorrow morning first thing. I'll have breakfast in it. I'll have to take it easy initially, I haven't used it in quite a while. Maybe just twenty or thirty minutes." She slipped from the sofa into her chair and rolled over. "Where shall we put it?"

"Wherever you want. I don't mind."

"Maybe we should have it in the bedroom out of the way."

"Why does it need to be out of the way? I thought you found it boring and claustrophobic."

"I do," she shrugged, "but it's not really going to add to the décor out here is it? It would be on display when we have visitors."

Rachel shook her head. "If it annoys you to be stuck on your own like you were at home, it should be out here, where we can all talk to you and be sociable. Surely it won't be so annoying for you then. And none of our visitors would care because everyone we know loves you. If someone really important comes around, like the President or something, we'll get Kurt to design some sort of fancy cover," Rachel started giggling at her own wit and when she found it too infectious, Quinn joined in.

They assembled it in the dining area, near the table but out of the way a little to appease Quinn. She would be able to eat there and chat to everyone, without feeling she was either on display or in everyone's way.

"Are you going to try today or not?" Rachel asked as they finished.

Quinn bit her lip and scrunched up her face. "I suppose I should, but what are we going to do?"

"We have some lines to learn for the East Bronx Theater production."

"Okay," Quinn agreed. "I'll get sorted, you get the script. Do you want some water?"

"Sure, let's hit the hard stuff," the brunette smiled.

The days passed quietly for the pair as they got used to living together full time. It was nice to have the apartment to themselves and they grew into a comfortable routine. Quinn had been to St Luke's for a health check and to follow her doctors plan. She had been given a long list of daily checks and instructions and they had prepared for the weekend when she would start on half doses of the meds she wanted to be clear of. She also spent an hour in the morning and an hour in the afternoon standing as well as an hour of laps in the university pool.

Rachel had their landlord round to check he was okay with some additions to the bathroom. Quinn had coped with some inconvenience in the apartment when she was just sleeping over but it wasn't the ideal set-up she had been used to in her dorm and living there full time was going to be a challenge without some changes. He had no problem with handrails being fitted to the wall over the bath and toilet and even offered to put them up if the girls ordered them. The shower needed a folding seat fastening to the wall, which was an easy purchase, but still meant Quinn found it a little awkward because the shower head was fixed above. Quinn explained how a plumber could attach a second handheld shower to the existing plumbing and that she would happily pay for it. The landlord was happy so long as the plumbers were reputable and the work was guaranteed. After some assurances, they agreed the work and a follow-up visit. Rachel was relieved that he was so accommodating for Quinn's sake. They all liked the apartment and didn't want to move elsewhere. The final addition was an evacuation chair in case there was a fire and the elevator couldn't be used, which had to be placed near the fire escape stairs. Quinn had no idea how she would get out if she was on her own, because she would need someone else to help her, but then that was true for any building she was in. They did a little rearranging of kitchen cabinets, making one of them Quinn's own with two or three of everything so she would need help or get stranded for the odd glass or bowl, even if she was on her own. It was a sensible idea that didn't disrupt anyone else's life. For emergencies she ordered a couple of long-handled grabbers, which she could use to lift down anything too high to reach from her seated position. Rachel liked it as well, because the back of the highest shelf in the cabinets was out of her reach without stepladders too.

The weekend finally arrived and it would only be another three days until Santana returned, by which time Quinn wanted to have her new drug regimen sorted so that her friend didn't spend every minute following her around to make sure she was okay. Quinn decided that the easiest thing to wear would be shorts in case she had to change and besides, it was hot. She woke early on Saturday morning and went to the bathroom first. She started her routine and finished with brushing her teeth before taking her limited dose of medication. She didn't feel any different but then she guessed there was always a residual amount in her system anyway.

Making her way back into the bedroom she found Rachel sitting up in bed watching her. "You're up early."

"I was awake and anxious to get on with it."

"I'm going to take a shower in a minute." Rachel waited until Quinn had gathered her clothes together and dropped them on the bed before transferring over to dress. Before she started, Rachel leaned over and gave her a tender kiss. She nipped at Quinn's bottom lip before leaving quietly without a fuss.

Quinn removed her PJs and dressed her top half before taking out the packet of absorbent underwear. She hadn't had to use these since she had first been injured. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment. "Come on, Fabray. It's just until you get this under control," she said the words out loud but they were only meant for herself. Opening out what was in effect a diaper on the mattress, she shifted her hips over and fastened it up. She could feel her cheeks burning even though no one would be seeing it. She sat back up and pulled on the baggy shorts that she hoped would hide it. The doctor she had spoken to at St Luke's had told her to be careful with her feet and make sure she kept them covered while she was in her chair. If she suffered from strong spasms, her feet could easily get bashed and end up with broken bones. She had a pair of running shoes ready and slipped them on after a pair of socks. Finally dressed, she pushed her legs off the bed and slid into her chair, ready to go eat breakfast once Rachel was finished in the shower.

She made coffee while Rachel was dressing and listened to the news. Rachel was singing to herself and it brought a smile to Quinn's face; she was singing Don't Rain on My Parade and the blonde wondered if it was prophetic in some way. She set the mugs down on the table and waited until Rachel eventually walked out of their bedroom.

Rachel took over the rest of the breakfast preparations while Quinn hoisted herself in the frame until she was standing. Feeling slightly self-conscious, she tugged at the shorts to make sure they were covering her properly. Rachel placed a mug down on the tray and filled it with coffee, then brought over a bowl of granola.

"Do you feel tall again?" she asked.

Quinn waved her closer. She couldn't really lean over when strapped into the frame. "I like being able to do this," she pulled Rachel in for a quick kiss.

Rachel pulled back slightly. "I guess now that I have you where I want you, I can abuse the power." She pulled in closer again and this time they exchanged a real kiss which lasted a few minutes. "How do you feel?"

"Pretty good, especially after that," Quinn replied, but then seeing Rachel actually meant it, "I feel fine, same as normal so far."

Rachel glanced down at Quinn's legs briefly, checking that she was following instructions about footwear. "Good, eat up then." The brunette dropped into the nearest dining chair and chatted over breakfast. When they were done, Quinn started to lower herself back down.

"That was thirty minutes," she puffed as she dropped back into her chair.

"Do you want to go out today? I wondered if you would like to go to the park or something; it's beautiful out."

"I would love to but I think I better stay here today, just in case."

Over the next few days Quinn found not much had changed. She hadn't had any 'accidents' and she hadn't felt unwell in any way, so when she next visited the doctor, he was happy to reduce the medication further again. She was now down to a quarter dose. Although her blood pressure remained okay, the spasms were another matter.

They had started through the night and kept Quinn awake even though she was tired. Although she couldn't feel her legs moving directly, she could sense it in her upper body and it was a little distressing as she couldn't really do much to stop them. She also found that they affected her during the day, though she was able to massage them out sometimes.

Santana arrived back after spending time with Julia at Niagara Falls. As she came back into the apartment, she noticed the subtle changes that had arrived with Quinn moving in. The blonde was on the sofa reading whilst Rachel had gone out for groceries.

"Hey," Quinn looked up. "How was your trip?"

Santana played it cool. "Good," she placed her hands on her hips having thrown her bag down. "How's married life with you and Barbara Junior."

Quinn frowned her disapproval at Santana's name-calling.

"Sorry, I keep forgetting I have to be nice to her. I had a good time okay, it was pretty awesome actually. The two of you should totally check it out, it's all like wheelchair friendly and shit."

"You're so thoughtful, San. What would I do without you?"

"Chill, Blondie." Santana went to the sofa and gave her friend a hug, dropping beside her. "How's the withdrawal going?"

"So-so. The first few days were good all-round and my blood pressure is rock steady despite only having a really low dosage now, but the muscle relaxants aren't proving so easy to get rid of."

"What's the problem?"

"Just really bad spasms in my legs, mostly through the night, so I'm not getting too much sleep and therefore neither is Rach. I actually considered sleeping in your room a couple of times just so I didn't keep waking her up, but she wouldn't have it."

"Is it getting any easier?"

"I'll give it until I go back to the doctor in a couple of days, but the spasms aren't reducing any."

"That sucks a little, but at least you don't have to take such a high dose."

Quinn changed the subject eager to talk about something other than her injury. "So how's it with Joolz?"

Santana smiled and she had a mischievous glint in her eye that had been missing in a while. "A little shy, but cute with it. I'm kind of enjoying leading her astray. She's worried about telling her parents though, so we're still not allowed to be official yet."

"How do you feel about that?"

"No big deal. I wouldn't want to have what happened to me happen to her, so for now it's cool. I hope she can find a way to be completely open soon, but it's up to her."

"When is she coming back?"

"Couple of weeks I think." Santana sighed. "If we're not going away now, which it looks like we're not, I need to find some work for the duration. I have a lead on a waitressing job. What about you?"

"I'm going to start some serious exercise and I might look into volunteering for a non-profit or something. I don't need to earn, but I don't want to get bored, so once I get the meds under control, I'm going to find something useful to do."

"I see the standing frame made it here. Have you used it today?"

"I've been in twice a day, every day." Quinn replied with a roll of the eyes. "Between you and Rach I can see I won't be getting away with much."

"No excuses, right?"

"Nope," Quinn grinned. "I'm going to make lunch for us, Rach should be back soon." She placed her book on the arm of the sofa and prepared to transfer back into her chair. She slid across from one seat to the other and pushed down on the back wheels to lift her hips into place, but as she did so, her right leg began to shake and straightened itself out. "Dammit," she grabbed her thigh and started to knead the tightening muscle.

Santana watched with a pained expression. Quinn had warned her, but still it looked like it must hurt. "Are you okay?"

"It's just annoying," came the reply through gritted teeth. "Not to mention a bit embarrassing. You should see your face."

"It's a little uncomfortable to watch, I'm not gonna lie."

"It's not for me, I can't even feel it, but I know it looks weird."

"Why does it happen?"

"Random nerve signals I guess. I mean unconscious ones. It's not like I'm trying to move, it just happens and I don't have any control over them." Eventually it subsided and Quinn's knee finally bent so her leg fell limp again and she lifted it into position properly. There was still a residual bit of movement and her foot bounced up and down on the rest for a while after. Quinn sighed and tucked her hair behind her ears. "It's been like that for four days now," she placed a hand on her knee to hold it still until the vibration stopped.

"Do you need me to do anything? I can help you stretch or something."

Quinn shook her head. "We already tried that and it doesn't seem to make much difference."

Santana accepted the answer and tried to ignore the repeated movements which caused her best friend some distress even if it wasn't painful.

Rachel arrived back in time for lunch with several bags from the grocery store to find Santana and Quinn in the kitchen preparing sandwiches. The brunettes greeted each other and Rachel set about putting away the food.

"I'm just going to the bathroom to wash up," Quinn announced.

She left and Santana brought everything to the table while she was gone.

"Everything alright?" Rachel asked a thoughtful Santana.

"I guess. Is Q okay? I mean all this messing around with the meds," she nodded towards the bathroom.

"Apart from the muscle spasms, she has been fine and the doctor is satisfied that she isn't having any health issues from it."

"It looks pretty bad when the spasms kick in though. Are you sure it's not doing any harm?"

"It looks worse than it is apparently. Did she have a bout of them while I was out?"

"It completely freaked me out to see her leg just kinda fly out on it's own."

"I suppose we've gotten used to her legs not moving so to see them moving of their own accord is admittedly very strange. I had a similar experience to you when it first happened."

Santana made a motion to stop talking as Quinn rolled back into the room. "I know you're talking about me, so don't pretend you aren't." Quinn's famous eyebrow told them she wasn't going to believe a denial.

"It wasn't anything derisory or insensitive," Rachel replied softly. "Santana just wanted some reassurance that the experiment with the medication was progressing without any serious repercussions."

"So in other words, does she need to freak after seeing my leg dance around for a couple of minutes?"

"Hey, Q come on," her friend was about to protest.

"It's alright, I'm not pissed at you, just a bit annoyed that it isn't working as well as I had hoped. Ironic huh? I spent a long time hoping my legs would move again after the accident and now they do, I can't wait for them to stop. Never mind, let's eat," she nodded at the food laid out.

During the course of the afternoon, Santana had shown them the photos from Niagara Falls and caught them up to speed with everything that had happened over the days she had been away with Julia. Similarly the pair had reciprocated with news of what had been happening in their lives, which in truth wasn't much. They had essentially taken advantage of having little to do for several days. After the exchange of gossip was over they settled in front of the TV to watch something mindless for a change and chatted some more. An hour or so later Rachel's phone started buzzing.

She looked at the screen but didn't recognize the number. "Hello, this is Rachel Berry," came the rather formal greeting reserved for those she didn't know very well. "Oh! Thank you for calling."

Quinn looked up at the slight surprise evident in the brunette's voice. She reached over and distracted Santana from the TV she was still watching even though she had turned down the volume. Nodding in Rachel's direction, they pair now watched her intently.

Rachel's face was suddenly looking very excited. "Really? I mean I can't believe it, especially when you didn't call for so many days," she responded to the male voice, which neither of the other two could hear clearly; the phone was pressed tightly to Rachel's ear. "Of course, I understand completely; you must have had so many auditions for the show." There was another pause. "Next Monday, of course I can make that. Thank you so much once again. Yes of course, goodbye."

Rachel stared at her phone for a second and then at the Quinn and San, and then she screamed.

"Oh my God! Oh my God!"

Quinn knew what it was even before Santana asked. She wasn't one for screaming out loud or even shouting too much, she had generally been a more controlled person, hence her 'Ice Queen' nickname at McKinley, but this amount of excitement was too much to be reserved.

"What was that?" San looked over.

"Oh my God!" Rachel uttered again.

"Was that …" San still wasn't getting any sense out of the short one.

"That was a call-back for Funny Girl," Quinn stated. "Tell me that was a call-back."

Rachel's face was elated. "It was," she launched herself at Quinn who ended up pinned to the sofa under her girlfriend as they embraced, which sparked yet another spasm in Quinn's legs. "I didn't think I was going to get one after nearly two weeks. I got a call-back." She was incredulous but also felt the movement from underneath her and it caught her off-guard for a moment.

Rachel felt herself bodily lifted from the sofa and then realized it was Santana who had dragged her up to give her a hug. Quinn took the opportunity to right herself and then shift into her chair. "This situation calls for champagne," she puffed a little from the effort of moving and trying to get her legs to stay still.

"Where are we going to get some? No one's going to sell us any at our age."

Quinn rolled her eyes. "Please, I brought two bottles back with me from Lima. Your Dad gave them to me. One to open when you get your call-back and the other when they give you the part."

Quinn sighed but agreed with the doctor's analysis of the situation as she sat in his office the following morning. She had just explained the moment where the straw had broken the camel's back, which wasn't a very sensitive comment to make about a paraplegic, but as she said it about herself, it was okay. That moment had been reached the night before when in the small hours Quinn had woken to a yelp of pain from Rachel. At some point the diminutive brunette had snuggled up to her lover and they had been laid close to one another when Quinn's legs chose this moment to thrash around in a particularly strong spasm and one of her feet had kicked into Rachel's calf, leaving a big red mark, which had turned bluish by the next morning. The top of Quinn's foot also sported a similar-looking bruise the next morning. Although Rachel had laughed it off, Quinn was tired of the disturbed sleep, feeling worse as a result of withdrawing the medication that she had when she was on the full dose. The doctor had immediately upped the muscle relaxants to half dose again and things had settled within an hour. After a final check of her blood pressure, the doctor finally let her go home. Although it wasn't what she had been hoping for, the blonde accepted that it had been on the cards for several days and at least it was countered by the good news that she came off the blood pressure meds altogether and had no signs of any problems at all over the following days.

Rachel's call-back hadn't been quite as exciting as she had hoped. She had been asked to sing again, this time a song from the show, which hadn't been an issue as she knew them all off-by-heart. She had then been asked to run lines with the male lead who had been chosen in the time since her first audition. He had been a little stand-offish with her and seemed unimpressed as they had run through it. Rachel had left shortly afterwards, the director and actor remaining behind to discuss the matter.

With Rachel occupied that day, Quinn set about doing some hardcore research. She pulled herself up into the standing frame shortly after Rachel had left that morning and booted up her laptop. She needed something to keep busy, convinced that Rachel would get the part and have rehearsals all summer.

Reelabilities Film Festival caught her eye, but that wasn't going to be happening until next March, though she wondered if maybe Artie might be interested in doing something together now he was going to be so close. Quinn fired off an email enquiry about getting involved, but was more interested in doing something with kids. She looked into all sorts of non-profit organizations but couldn't quite find what she was looking for. Sighing, she eventually gave up for the day and decided to go for a swim instead.

Once inside the familiar Dodge Hall building at Columbia, Quinn made her way up to the sports facilities and found the changing rooms. It was quieter than during the school year, but there were still people around, mostly university staff. She went to her regular changing room and shifted from her chair to a bench so she could strip her top layer off. Quinn liked to speed up the process by changing into her one-piece at home first and then all she had to do at the pool was take off the clothes she had on top. Balancing carefully on the smooth wooden surface, she lifted first one foot and then the other to remove her running shoes and white ankle socks, then carefully dropped her bare feet back down to the floor so she could wriggle out of the blue shorts she wore on her increasingly tanned legs. It was strange to see her previously pale legs looking a little healthier. The tan was a bit strange though, deeper on the front of her legs and feet than on the back, but she was much less worried about this than she would have been in the past. Her knees were especially brown, but only to mid-thigh where the shorts she had been wearing a lot lately had ended. Her grey Columbia Lions T-shirt was easily tossed aside. Moving back from the bench to her chair, now minus the cushion, which she didn't want to get wet, but lined with her swim team towel instead, Quinn dug under her seat to the small bag hung below. From inside she took out her locker key, swim cap and goggles, dropping them in her lap and gathering her clothes to stow until afterwards. After dropping everything in her low locker, she turned the key and pinned it to the corner of the towel.

Once poolside, Quinn glanced around to see who was on duty. She recognized one of the two lifeguards as a junior from the swim team and gave her a wave.

"Hey Quinn, how's your summer so far?" The junior, Annabelle asked.

"Good, but quiet. Thanks for asking. Are you working all summer?"

"Just until August, then I get a few weeks off before the next semester starts. I thought you might be going back home for the holidays."

"I did for a short while, but Rachel is up for a part in a show so we came back."

"Sounds exciting, wish her luck for me," the guard dropped down from the elevated seat. "You want me to move your chair back out of the way until you're done?" she asked, knowing Quinn wouldn't need help to get in.

"Thanks, I'll shout when I'm done, that's if you'll still be on duty."

"I have another couple of hours yet before my next break," Annabelle replied. "Let me know if you need a hand."

"Have you seen the rubber mat I put down over the edge? It wasn't where it usually is over on the side. I haven't been for a few weeks."

"Let me look in the storeroom." Annabelle wandered a few feet away to the storeroom and unlocked it. Disappearing inside briefly, she came back out with the blue rubber mat. "Here you go, where do you want it?"

"Over by the steps so I can use the handrail," Quinn nodded and led the way. Annabelle dropped the mat and draped it over the edge of the pool next to the rail so the blonde could pull herself down from her chair and move to sit on the edge; the mat protected her legs from bumping against the hard tile. "Thanks, I'm good from here." Quinn adjusted her legs and then tipped forwards so her hands pushed into the water, her head and shoulders following, but then the weight of her legs and torso meant the rest fell in clumsily.

Annabelle watched Quinn duck under and then bob back up immediately. She started to walk back to her seat and climbed up the steps so she could clearly see the pool. She wasn't so much worried about Quinn as fascinated by how she was able to go so quickly without being able to kick. Annabelle was pretty swift and in breaststroke she could easily do two laps to every one Quinn swam, but in front crawl it was a different matter and the blonde newcomer could challenge most of the other girls even if she couldn't beat them. They were all envious of the effortless arm action Quinn had developed and in the end, she only lost out because she couldn't kick off the wall in the turns.

Quinn had her elbows on the edge of the pool to prop herself up briefly in order to adjust her goggles and then she spun around and started swimming. Annabelle could see how as soon as Quinn started to pull through the water, her legs fell together and left her body stretched out in a streamlined shape. As with most of the girls on the swim team, Annabelle was full of admiration for her paraplegic teammate.

Quinn was pretty relaxed, just finding a nice comfortable pace. She had found swimming easy from the first time she got in the pool after the accident and just started there, but now it was more than just something to keep herself fit like it had been originally; it was something she was great at like she had been great at cheer. She got exactly the same buzz from competing even though she rarely won as she had before. Quinn was nothing if not competitive.

The pool was pretty quiet mid-morning so Annabelle didn't need to concentrate as much as when it was really busy, but there were a few kids taking lessons from one of the coaches on the other side so she had to keep checking everyone, but eventually her relief came and took over so she could take a bathroom break.

"Everything good so far?" The guy asked.

"Yeah, the kids are a little noisy over there but otherwise its quiet. Check out my teammate though. That's Quinn, she was a freshman this last year. She's in a wheelchair; her legs are paralyzed, but she is amazing."

"Awesome." The guy swapped places so Annabelle could take her break.

Quinn stopped for a break herself, holding onto the handrail briefly. Her goggles had gotten a little water inside so she propped herself on her elbows again and flipped them up to clear them. She was breathing heavily, but not gasping as she fixed them back on again and switched to backstroke for a while. She was less efficient on her back because her legs weren't as streamlined and tended to bob around a little more, her lower legs in particular tended to drop down so she was dragging a greater surface area through the water. It was good exercise though because it increased the resistance she had to pull against. After thirty more laps, Quinn could feel her arms and shoulders beginning to burn.

At the next turn, she simply sculled back to give her shoulders a rest before the last sixteen lengths of gentle front crawl to cool down. Glancing at the clock on her last length, she spotted Annabelle walking alongside the pool in her red shorts and white T-shirt, with blue flip-flops on her feet. She had been swimming for about seventy minutes now and was feeling pretty tired. At the end she put her elbows down and rested for a minute to get her breath back. Annabelle had kept pace down the pool and was stood waiting for her by the steps.

"You must be pretty whacked out by now, Quinn."

"Wasted. My shoulders are burning."

Annabelle knew Quinn sometimes took help getting out of the pool after a heavy session or a race so she offered to help, finding her colleague had also jumped down to assist if needed. The wheelchair was already waiting for Quinn just behind them.

"Need a hand to get out?"

Quinn nodded. "Just give me a minute to … get myself together."

Annabelle turned to the other lifeguard. "Do you know what to do?"

He shook his head.

"We just grab a hand each and lift her up backwards until she's sitting on the edge. That's usually all the help she needs."

Quinn kept one hand firmly on the side of the pool, but turned her back to the edge and held up the other for Annabelle to grab. Once she knew she had one hand secured, she released the other from the edge and held it up for the guy to grab next. Annabelle counted them in to the lift and Quinn felt her arms tense as she was lifted a little, just enough so that her legs folded once her hips were over the lip and she was sat comfortably next to the rail. Folding her legs up, Quinn was now sat cross-legged on the mat and felt the frame of her chair arrive right behind her courtesy of her teammate.

"Thanks for the help," she turned to give Annabelle a grin. "Thank your colleague for me as well. I don't know him, what's his name," she nodded at the lanky young man now sat in the elevated chair.

"Brett I think, he's new."

"He's cute," Quinn gave Annabelle a look that said she should be interested.

"Shut up, he's in high school. I think he's like seventeen or something."

"He could be your toyboy," she winked. Quinn knew Annabelle had broken up with one of the guys on the dive team recently.

Annabelle rolled her eyes. "I'm happy being single right now," she grinned a slightly lopsided smile. "He is cute though, you're right about that."

They both laughed, but trying not to attract attention from the teenager who was looking down on them from across the other side of the pool.

Quinn took the towel from her chair and dried her hands properly and avoided touching anything wet until she pushed herself back up into her chair. It wasn't the usual smooth action she had developed, but rather jerky from the ache in her shoulders. "I am going to pay for going out so hard for the first time in weeks," she grumbled. "Rachel had better be in the mood to give my shoulders a rub down later."

"Are you going to be okay getting home? I assume you have moved out of the dorm, have you got far to go?"

"No, I brought my car back from Ohio so I'm parked out on the street. I'll be fine after a little rest, honestly."

"That's good. Will you be back tomorrow? I'm on mornings and afternoons all this week if you are. Maybe we can get lunch one day and catch up, I haven't seen you much since the end of the season."

"That sounds great, maybe Wednesday? I'll have a rest day tomorrow. I suspect I might have an attack of the DOMS after today!"

The students shared another giggle and a hug before Quinn rolled back out to the changing rooms to start her lengthy routine of getting undressed and in the shower without any loss of dignity; it was still a little difficult if she was honest with herself, not that she would have complained. At least now, after well over a year of practice, she could sit comfortably on the bench to undress without having to prop herself up on her hands. Her core muscles had benefitted massively from the swimming and her regular home exercises, on top of just daily activities like getting into and out of her chair. The result was marked over the first few months when she either had help or fell over.

After the shower, she went back into the locker area and dressed. The day ahead of her stretched out with nothing much to do and for the first time in ages, Rachel hadn't been around to fill that space. Most of her friends were out of the city or working long hours in minimum wage jobs for the duration. She wondered about spending time doing something enjoyable like going shopping but in truth it wasn't nearly so much fun shopping on your own as it was with friends.

Quinn took out her phone and scrolled through the list of names, wondering if any of them were around and at a loose end that afternoon. She checked the time; just before noon. She got near the bottom of the list and a name popped out. Shelby wasn't too far away and would be on lunch break soon. She fired off a quick text message and finished dressing.

A few minutes later she got a reply from the older woman.

_Hi Quinn, free for lunch, join us. Having picnic in park. Meet at daycare asap._

Quinn replied immediately._ Shall I stop for extra food?_

Shelby returned with another instant response. _Getting carry out from Italian, what do u want?_

_I eat anything._

Quinn hurriedly ran a brush through her hair and didn't stop to dry it, she dumped the wet gear straight into her kit bag, not even bothering to rinse it out and zoomed out the door and down the elevator. She was thankful that it deposited her straight out on college walk so she could get to her car in a couple of minutes.

It was fifteen minutes before she could get across town to meet Shelby and Beth. As she started to unload her chair, the toddler ran straight to her with Shelby immediately following out the door of the daycare.

Quinn dropped a wheel and grabbed the toddler for a kiss. "Hey little B." They shared a little moment, but Shelby lifted her daughter out again so Quinn could extricate herself from the vehicle. "Sorry I'm late, traffic wasn't so bad, but it still took a while."

"There's no rush. Perk of being the boss." Shelby nodded back towards the daycare. "I was surprised to get your message."

"I was over at the pool and realized I was bored without Rachel around so I just took a chance on you being around for lunch."

"Where's Rachel today? Is she working?"

Quinn's face broke into a huge grin. "She got a call-back for Funny Girl!" Her excitement was hard to conceal.

"No way! Why didn't she call me?" Shelby was a little surprised after she and her other daughter had become much closer even if they didn't share every intimate detail of their lives.

"I don't think it's sunk in yet and she still doesn't really think she has a chance so she hasn't said anything to anyone. Santana and I just happened to be there when she got the call."

Shelby was thrilled by the news. She held up a wheel for Quinn to attach to the frame and then watched as the blonde swung her hips into it. She noticed the shorts and T-shirt and realized she had never seen Quinn look so informal, pink hair phase aside.

Quinn looked at her legs and it suddenly occurred to her that she hadn't intended going out anywhere. "I didn't think I would be meeting up with anyone so I didn't think to bring any decent clothes, sorry."

"What is there to apologize for?"

"Well, I usually wear something less … revealing?" She looked at Shelby, but saw the well-dressed woman shrug.

"I don't care, we're having an afternoon in the park in summer, what's wrong with what you have on?"

"Nothing I guess," Quinn shrugged, adjusting her clothes as she made herself comfortable in the chair. "No stroller today?" She asked the brunette.

"No, we are going to walk today. We need to head to the Italian to pick up our food and then we can head over to the park."

Beth was excited at the mention of the park and she tugged at Shelby's hand to drag her there.

"Slow down Beth, we need to get lunch first. Come on," she directed Beth along the sidewalk and Quinn rolled beside.

"Do you want a ride, Beth?" she asked the tiny blonde who nodded in reply, her curls bouncing around as she did.

Shelby lifted her up and dropped her on Quinn's knees and she stayed there until they reached the restaurant. Shelby disappeared inside briefly and then came straight back out with a carrier bag and they continued on for five minutes until they reached the park gates.

They found the picnic tables, but noticing Shelby had a rolled up travel rug strapped to her shoulder, Quinn suggested they sit on the grass so Beth could play. The older woman looked a little surprised. "I just thought it would be easier at the table," she shrugged.

"Easier isn't always better," Quinn smiled.

They spread the rug out and allowed Quinn to drop to the ground before taking the food out. The three of them sat and ate the spread of sandwiches and chips in the sun. Quinn sat cross-legged with Beth in her lap, handing her half-sandwiches that Shelby cut up for the small fingers to manage. Beth seemed as comfortable as always with Quinn and for the blonde teenager, this was enough. She realized that she didn't need to be Beth's mom like she had in the past. Her own childhood had been far from ideal. She thought back to something Sam had once said to her, before her accident. He said she had 'rich white girl problems' but he had no idea what her life was like. She might have had parents who were relatively wealthy, but she hadn't really been given unconditional love and honestly, how could she have ever been a good mother to Beth without even knowing what that was. Shelby had been right to yell at her and throw her out of her apartment. Even this picnic was a way of showing her what that meant. Letting her be a part of Beth's life was for Beth, not Shelby or herself.

"Cat got your tongue?" Shelby asked her as she soaked up the warmth of the sun on her face, realizing the other girl hadn't said much so far.

"I was just thinking about something. It's not important."

"Important enough to distract you from this rather excellent food," Shelby called her out.

Quinn chuckled. "Okay I was thinking about how nice this is and that it's just enough. This is all I need from life right now."

Shelby turned to face her this time and raised an eyebrow, expecting more of an explanation.

"I was thinking about the time you kicked me out of your apartment and told me that I didn't understand what it meant to be a parent; that it was putting the child's needs above your own and that's what I thought I was trying to do, but I didn't really understand, not fully. I do now though, it's letting me be a part of Beth's life even when you didn't really trust me to begin with. You did that for her, not for me or even for yourself. I get it now, finally, and I never would have known if it wasn't for all the other things that have happened to me. So I was just thinking that I would have been a terrible parent if I didn't understand how that worked; I thought that Beth was mine because I gave birth to her, like she was a possession. I really hope I have grown up a lot lately because that alone tells you what a wreck of a human being I was. Teenagers really are selfish. I thought I had everything and really I had nothing. Now I have this so I have enough." She turned to meet Shelby's glassy gaze. "Tell me you're not going to cry."

"I'm not going to cry, but I think I might want to," Shelby squeezed the words out and blinked a couple of times. "It was hard to see you that first time at Rachel's and not want to just disappear, but I felt bad for running out on Rachel so many times and she begged me to stay, so against my instincts I did. I still don't know why. But then I saw Beth go to you and I realized that she needed to spend time with you, even if I didn't like that very much."

"And now," Quinn squinted into the sun, not quite certain of the other woman's emotions about her still.

"Beth really enjoys spending time with you and even though she is too young to fully understand what love is, I think she will grow to love you. I don't think I could deprive her of that. As for me, I've learned to look past your immaturity and see someone worthwhile emerge. I don't really know what you call our bizarre relationship, but I feel like you and Rachel are now a part of Beth's family and by default, mine as well. I haven't really had one until now though so you have to forgive me for not really knowing what to do with that."

"Me either, my normal family turned out to be not so normal after all. Normal is overrated, so I kind of like our new non-standard family thing."

"Me too," they settled into a moment of quiet contemplation.

"Can I ask you a favor?"

Shelby nodded.

"I am going to ask my mom to come and stay for a few days later in the summer and I don't want to disrupt any plans you might have, but I would really like her to spend some time with Beth. I completely understand if you think that's a bad idea though, because of the whole dysfunctional family thing I have going on."

Shelby laughed. "I don't mind. I chatted to her a little at your party and she was perfectly charming."

"She is now she's sober," a grimace appeared on Quinn's face. "That's one of the good things to come from my accident; she stopped drinking when she had to take care of me."

"It's not the only good thing. I know it must have been an awful thing to go through and I'm not in any way suggesting I'm glad that you were hurt, but there are a lot of relationships that would have stayed broken if you hadn't turned your life around."

"I know and that's another reason why this is just enough."

Quinn and Shelby played with Beth for a little while longer before packing away the remains of the food and heading back towards the daycare. Beth didn't want Quinn to leave so Shelby invited her to stay for a while and have some fun with the kids.

Unsurprisingly, there was a lot of singing songs in Shelby's daycare, but that was something Quinn didn't object to as she joined in nursery rhymes and popular children's favorites. She also helped change diapers and hand out snacks and drinks later in the afternoon. Quinn actually had no idea where the time went and was shocked to get a message from Rachel who had arrived at the apartment with no sign of Quinn.

_WHERE R U?_

_W. Shelby n beth daycare, home soon_

_I was worried abt u, apt deserted and no sign_

Quinn felt a little guilty that she hadn't text Rachel to let her know where she was. She realized things were different now they were living together.

_Sorry lost track of time, leaving soon, love u_

_Np luv U 2_

Quinn said her goodbye's to everyone. She had loved being with the kids and they had enjoyed her too. Quinn felt completely at home with them and not a single one of the children had even mentioned her wheelchair. It had been one of the best days she could remember.


	33. Chapter 33

A/N: I have had quite a few interesting questions after recent chapters and want to thank those of you who have taken an interest. The following was sent and i thought it was a great question to ask, but as i cannot reply to a guest review, it thought i would put it here instead.

Guest 11/6/13: Thank you for letting us know how Quinn gets some things done. I wonder if she can have a baby still? I know people do it but I just dont get it. I mean she must still get a period right? At least she had Beth I guess. Maybe Rachel will carry the baby if they get married

In response, there is no reason Quinn couldn't have a child as a result of her injury. For women, fertility is largely unaffected by spinal cord injury, which isn't true for men (it's kind of complicated). Women who are paraplegic usually have no issues provided they don't have other underlying fertility issues.

Here's the next instalment.

Chapter 33

Rachel was beside herself wondering if she had got the part or not but Quinn still felt that she must be close to getting it if they had her back to read for it again. Nevertheless, with Rach so distracted, Quinn decided they should go out.

"Let's go to the diner where San got a job, she asked us to go."

"Okay, I need a distraction."

"You need to relax about this thing, it's all going to work out. Did you check the theater was accessible because I am going to want to be there on opening night," she shrugged.

Rachel gave her a cute smile, showing her dimples. "I appreciate your being kind to me, Quinn I really do, but it's not necessary. If I get it, I will be elated, but I can live with the disappointment if I don't. There will be other shows and I know I am going to be successful someday."

"Sooner than you think," Quinn squeezed her hand. "I'll just go put something decent on and then we can go."

"I kind of like your less formal look," Rachel grinned sheepishly. "It's a bit like back in school with your Cheerio's uniform.

"You know I still have that somewhere," Quinn winked before turning to go.

They arrived outside the fifties-styled diner just after seven that evening. Santana was busy working one of her tables as they approached the door. She hadn't seen them enter, but the greeter had.

"Table for two?" she asked Rachel.

"Yes please, but our friend works here. Do you think you could let her know? Santana, she's over there," Rachel pointed to their best friend over the opposite side of the bar.

"Of course," the greeter went around the polished chrome of the bar area and quickly spoke to Santana, whose head immediately went to the door and she waved before indicating she needed one minute by holding up a finger and mouthing the words.

The greeter returned and explained. "She's just clearing a table for you now."

They watched as Santana moved over to the open tables rather than the booth she had just been working, cleared off the dishes and handed them to the busboy, gave it a quick wipe and then pulled away one of the chairs so Quinn could roll up with ease. When everything was ready, she came over and gave them both a hug and introduced her colleague before leading them to the table.

"So I hear the food is great here, but the waitresses are a little feisty," Quinn teased San.

"Please, you're lucky you got in the door first, I would have locked you out if I'd known you were coming," she grinned as she handed them menus.

Rachel rolled her eyes at the banter. "Behave both of you. I would like a strawberry and mango smoothie."

"Sounds good. Q?"

"Hmm. I'll take ice tea please."

"Oh, come on. Have a milkshake. They have ice cream in them," the persuasive Latina tried twisting her arm.

"I guess it sounds good. Which flavor?"

"Well I tried the chocolate and it's divine."

Quinn ordered one and watched her friend disappear off to get them from the bar. Scouring the menu, there was the usual mix of salads, pasta, pizza, burgers and grilled food. She and Rachel discussed what they were going to have. Rachel was always limited in choice and was struggling what to choose beyond a plain salad.

Santana brought their drinks after a few minutes.

"How are the tips coming?" Rachel asked her.

"Not as good as the bar, but this is better for the soul."

"Now that you discovered you have one," Quinn smirked.

"I told the bar attendant to put crushed glass instead of ice cream in your drink," San retorted. Turning back to Rachel, she pasted her smile back on. "I spoke to the chef for you and told him what sort of things you like so he said he will make a vegan club sandwich for you with hummus, grilled vegetables and barley if there is nothing else that you like the look of."

"That sounds good, please thank him or her for me."

"Q?"

"Grilled chicken ranch salad and garlic bread please, San."

They ate in peace, chatting about the day and having the occasional conversation with Santana as she passed them every once in a while. The manager even stopped by and promised them a desert on the house, which after her swim earlier, Quinn took him up on.

They walked home later because it was still light and both had eaten plenty. They held hands and found a comfortable pace, apart from when they had to cross the road and Quinn had to wriggle her hand from Rachel's to control her descent down the curb cuts, otherwise she would have rolled straight into the path of oncoming cars.

On the long road up to the apartment, Rachel broke the comfortable silence that had fallen over both of them.

"Are you terribly disappointed that we are still here instead of heading to Vegas and LA?"

Quinn looked up but didn't remove her hand from the brunette's grasp. "Rach I spent the afternoon with Beth, why would that disappoint me?"

"I just wondered because the one thing I want more than anything, including being a star on Broadway, is for your life to be as full as it possibly can be and I can't help thinking that I might not be doing that right now."

Quinn halted and tugged at her girlfriends hand. "Rachel, why worry about this now? I thought we had agreed to spend the Summer here and just enjoy it. I had a lovely evening with you and it wouldn't have been any better if it had been halfway around the world instead of just a few blocks from where we live."

"Yes but you deserve so much to be happy and I don't want to stop you from doing things. You already made more sacrifices than anyone should have to."

Quinn was slightly irritated. Yes she had lost some things or had to give them up, but not going travelling wasn't a reason to be morbid, so why was Rachel being so glum about it? The question remained unanswered in that moment.

"Rach, don't take this the wrong way because I know you care massively about me, but I'm not going anywhere and the world will still be there for us another time. What is this really about. Have I given you the impression that I am unhappy about staying here so you can get this part?"

"No, not at all. It's just ... just that I will feel so bad, like I have let you down if I don't get it now we have sacrificed travelling for a part I probably won't get anyway."

"You're rambling again," Quinn gave her a reassuring smile. "And I am fine with us being here so long as we're together. I was thinking that today was a lot of fun so instead of trying to find something charitable to do, I might ask Shelby if I can help out at the daycare when you're in rehearsals. That's if you get the part obviously. If you don't, we'll visit places we've never been before. So long as we are home together at the end of the day, I am happy."

They started walking again, quiet once more settling between them. Quinn thought that she had changed a lot, but at that moment she realized just how much Rachel had also changed. In the past the petite brunette had been socially awkward, but her direct manner in relating to her talent, the apparent arrogance, was gone. Rachel had never doubted her ability to perform and yet here she was feeling somewhat unsure of herself.

"Rach," Quinn looked up at her as they continued, "how come you think you won't get the part? It's not like you to feel insecure about your singing ability."

Rachel didn't make eye contact. She chewed her lip and sighed. "I overheard the director and the male lead talking as they left the theater, they didn't know I was collecting my jacket from the stage where I left it. They both thought I was talented and looked right for the part, but also thought I was too young to play the lead."

Quinn's heart sank a little. "Why didn't you challenge them about it? You're the girl who went after Carmen Tibideaux for a redo of your audition, surely you can't just let them walk off thinking that."

"It's fine, There will be other parts, and they obviously have their pick of talent. I'll not give up trying out for roles, but I think I was biting off more than I can chew."

Quinn blew a puff of air from her cheeks. "Remember when you last performed?" Rachel nodded. "I stood up for you, well sort of, I was so moved. You made a paraplegic stand up Rach, how many people can say they have inspired that?"

"You're biased," she countered.

Quinn laughed. "I am not biased. I fell in love with you because when you sang, you made me feel something inside. You made me have some sort of emotional response, and they used to call me the 'Ice Queen' remember. I hid from emotion for the longest time and you were the one person who made me feel. Do you know how much that means?"

"That's a beautiful thing to say. When you are in the audience it's easy to sing like that because I sing to you."

Quinn smiled. "I love that, but you are going to have to learn to bottle me because I am sure directors are going to refuse to let me sit in on your auditions every time."

Rachel laughed this time. "Maybe I can sit a picture of you in the front row and imagine you're there instead."

"They would probably think you were a little crazy if you did, but if it works..." she left the sentence unfinished as they both broke out into a fit of the giggles.

Rachel woke first the next morning and went in search of breakfast. She had it ready before either Quinn or Santana were up and so she went to shower. Quinn had been the last one in there because the newly installed shower seat had been left down. She tipped it up and turned the dial that switched the flow to the fixed shower head instead of the handheld and stood waiting for it to run a little warmer. She loved having Quinn around all the time and all the little adjustments they had made for the blonde reminded her that she was here to stay from now on.

She was halfway done when she heard Quinn shout through that she was turning on the coffee that Rachel had prepared already. This in turn had Santana shouting out for them both to shut up shouting, which made Rachel laugh at the irony.

Santana was a little grumpy but cheered up after a morning text message from Julia.

_HI, Q TOLD ME TO TEXT U. SHE SAYS U R MISERABLE - CHEER UP IM GONNA BE BACK IN NY SOON ;-) J_

_WHEN? _

_NEXT WEEK_

_COOL HAPPY NOW :-D CANT WAIT_

_ME EITHER_

Quinn grinned at San as she saw the smile spread across her face, knowing it must have been good news. The brunette looked up and saw the questioning glance.

"Cool your tits, Fabray. I promise to be nicer now I know she's back next week."

The blonde had a knowing smile on her face again.

There was plenty of chatter around the table for a while until they tried to decide what to do. Santana's shift was at five that afternoon so she had the whole day. Quinn was going to call Shelby later, but thought it was too early to call yet. Rachel suggested they go shopping on 5th Avenue because the big stores were having summer sales. For once Santana didn't complain and knowing they would be there to help out, Quinn agreed. She found shopping alone to be hard work sometimes; why was everything she wanted to look at on the highest racks or shelves?

At a little before ten they got themselves ready to go out, but just before they left, planning to go on public transport, Rachel got a call. It was a little cryptic to listen to as the brunette sounded so neutral. Quinn was pretty sure that if it was good news about Funny Girl Rach would be ecstatic, so it clearly wasn't that.

When she got off the phone Rachel appeared to have a sudden thought. "If we have lots of bags to bring back, maybe the car would be a better choice?"

Quinn didn't mind driving, but hadn't thought to suggest it for heading right into the heart of Manhattan. "Okay, I'll get the keys," she spun around and went to the bedroom she and Rachel now shared.

The moment she disappeared from view, Rachel turned conspiratorially to Santana and whispered "It's here, ready to be collected today from Mount Sinai."

"Awesome, I want to try it out too. Can we get her there without her suspecting?"

"She's going to be suspicious, but at least we can get it home in the car," the shorter girl responded, shrugging as she did. "Sssh, she's coming back."

They hit Macy's first and spent ages looking at shoes. Rachel as always spent half an hour trying on about eight pairs, each with a good degree of heel to make up for her lack of height. Santana didn't need the height but tried on a couple as well. Quinn found herself moderately jealous, not that she couldn't wear heels, but at how good they looked on her friends in comparison to her. She would wear them for a special occasion, but they didn't always sit right and she ended up with her toes pointing upwards as the heels dropped off the back of the footrest. Heels had gone the way of baby doll dresses, skinny jeans and long hair; dismissed because of impracticality. She still had dresses, skinny jeans and heels, but they largely stayed in the closet unless she had somewhere nice to go. She bought her jeans a little looser and a size four instead of the normal size two so she could dress quicker, but also so her legs looked a little thicker than they really were. Her top half had grown to the same size anyway since she had started swimming. Moments like this were why she didn't enjoy shopping as much as she used to. She inhaled deeply and tried to force the melancholy out of her because she knew the purses were probably next and they were about as much use to her now as the heels.

She waved over to Rachel to catch her attention. "I'm going up to sports," she called out.

Rachel looked confused for a moment, but then saw the look Quinn got when she was frustrated. "I'm going to leave it thanks," she muttered to the sales assistant. Hastily putting her own shoes back on, she nudged at Santana's shoulder and shepherded her towards Quinn.

The blonde wasn't grateful in the slightest. In fact she seemed a little put out. "You didn't need to run over, I could have met you up there. Finish what you're doing, I'm only going to get a puncture repair kit so I'll probably be back here before you're through with the shoes anyway."

"We're supposed to be having a nice day out together," Rachel reminded her.

Quinn sighed. "I'm sorry, you're right."

"Q, seriously? What's going on in that big brain of yours? I can practically hear the cogs ticking."

That drew a smile from her if nothing else. "I hate shopping for shoes and purses and all the other stupid stuff that's of no use to me anymore, okay? I just had a momentary lapse into old Quinn and came over all bitch for a second."

The two brunettes looked at each other and then fortunately Santana saved the day and laughed at her. "Go ahead then and choose what you want to look at. Berry can't decide which of the ten pairs of shoes she wants anyway, especially as they look almost identical to the ten pairs she already has in her closet."

Rachel elbowed Santana at that, but then smiled because she had done what she always did of late and made them all laugh.

"I don't know what to buy anymore. As much as I love Kurt, he suggests things that wildly impractical. I don't want to wear jeans in summer and shorts are okay but I feel underdressed if we go anywhere nice. I'm in need of some advice."

Rachel had a sudden thought. "We need to go to Gap, you need crop pants."

"And Ralph Lauren," San added.

"Student discount at Gap wins out." Quinn was much more prudent now it was her own money being spent.

They had fun in Gap. Quinn figured they must train their staff well because they always spoke to her not whoever she was with and their changing room was huge with a bench in it so she could try stuff on easily. She picked out a whole bunch of stuff, including a pretty short skirt which Rachel liked the look of and insisted she try on. Quinn was skeptical but agreed just to keep Rach quiet.

She slipped on a slim-fitting white shirt without unfastening it and then the navy sweater vest over the top before sliding across to the bench and removing her jeans. She replaced it with the skirt and thought the whole outfit looked a little like something Rachel would wear, but as she glanced into the mirror, she realized it was actually quite smart. If she was going to help out at the daycare, she needed to look smart. She transferred back to her chair and opened the door to show the other two.

"What do you think? Do I look respectable?" Quinn fiddled with her legs a little, though the skirt was doing a good job of keeping them together even if it only reached mid-thigh. "Do you think it's too short?"

Rachel looked up from the magazine she was reading and her mouth fell open. Santana just grinned at her and shook her head.

"Wow," the shop assistant admired the look which was simple but elegant. Quinn blushed. "You have such a tiny waist, I'm jealous."

"We keep telling her to show off the legs more, but she gets all self-conscious."

"Shut up, San," Quinn mumbled.

"You totally shouldn't be," the assistant responded.

"Thanks," Quinn smiled at her but then scowled at Santana before going back in to change again, this time into the crop pants that she actually thought were a good idea. She didn't even need to show Rach and San as she liked them immediately, in fact they would be a better choice than the skirt to go to the daycare. She had a navy and taupe pair in amongst the other stuff.

Eventually happy with everything bar one top she didn't like, she folded the lot onto her lap and went back outside. "I'm going to get these," she said rolling past her friends who then hurried to catch up as she went to the counter to pay. "Thanks for the help," she acknowledged.

Rachel was happy as always to help and checked the time. Quinn noticed Rachel had been looking at her phone regularly but hadn't realized it was just to make sure they weren't late at Mount Sinai, so she thought it was Rach checking to see if she had received a call about Funny Girl.

Quinn paid for her purchases and allowed Santana to carry the bags for her as she didn't want to stuff them into the backpack that was pretty much a permanent fixture on the back of her chair. "Shall we get lunch?" The others agreed. "Rach, you choose. Where do you want to go?"

Rachel was not a selfish person, but she did find that her choices were always limited when they ate out so she appreciated Quinn letting her choose where they ate. She also knew that Santana, having spent much more time with the shorter girl, was far less likely to complain about eating meat-free food than she would have when they were in school.

"Well you know how much I like Gobo, why don't we go to the upper west side one and then maybe we can call in to see Shelby at the daycare and you can ask her about helping out in person as you didn't get a chance to call earlier."

"Okay with me. San?"

"Sounds good; I like it there too, despite the lack of carnivorous options," she nudged Rachel. "Come on short-stuff, lead the way."

They loaded bags, people and the wheelchair into Quinn's car and set off through the midday traffic towards the upper west side. It was a far cry from driving around Ohio, but she was getting used to bumper-to-bumper traffic and at least if anyone else ran into her car again, they wouldn't be going fast enough to do much damage; the speedometer barely got to twenty miles per hour at any point.

After a pleasant lunch, they drove the couple of blocks to the daycare and surprised Shelby with a visit. Quinn explained the reason for her visit and Shelby was delighted by the idea of having the blonde around after she had been so helpful the previous day.

"I just wanted to explain that it wasn't about seeing Beth more. I really enjoyed being with the children and think it's something else to add to my resume instead of a boring part-time job or a stupid internship where I get exploited as free labor."

"It was great to have you around yesterday and the children asked where you were this morning so you must have made an impact." Shelby seemed genuinely pleased by the idea. "I'm not going to lie, an extra pair of hands around here is always welcome. Why don't you stay for a song or two, we were just about to start and I imagine Rachel is desperate to sing something." She put her arm around Rachel's shoulders and gave her a squeeze.

Rachel tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and pretended to be modest. "Well I don't mind, but maybe Santana would like to perform, she doesn't get as much opportunity these days."

"Pipe down, Berry. We both know you'll explode if you don't get in at least one song a day for an audience."

"What shall we sing?"

"They liked _Happy Talk_ yesterday. Pick something they recognize." Quinn had a few ideas but didn't interfere.

"Didn't you tell us that they like the Muppets?" Rachel asked Shelby, remembering a conversation some time ago. Shelby nodded in reply.

"Let's do _Rainbow Connection_," Rachel was really eager and Santana just chuckled. She didn't know who was more childlike; the little kids or Rachel.

"Okay," she sighed as if it was hard work.

They really only had time for the one song, even though the kids wanted them to stay for more. Beth looked pretty sad that they didn't stay longer but cheered up when Quinn promised to come back again soon. The three-year-old sat on her chair and had her arms folded with a sulky look on her face.

"But will it be today?" she asked Quinn.

"Not today, Baby Bear."

"Will it be tomorrow?"

Quinn chuckled at her persistence. "It might be, if I can. I have to go swimming tomorrow and then I might be able to come."

"Can I go swimming too?"

Beth's questions were incessant now she had learned to put words into sentences better. "Not tomorrow, but maybe another time."

"When can I go swimming?"

"I'm not sure, we'll check with Mommy. Can I get a hug goodbye?"

Beth nodded and dropped down from her chair and ran to Quinn. "Bye, Quinn," Beth climbed up into her lap and gave her a hug. The three-year-old could now say her name properly, if a little over-pronounced. It sort of came out as Kawinn, but no one minded, Qs were hard.

"Bye Bethie, be a good girl for Mommy and I'll see you soon."

"Promise?"

"I promise," Quinn laughed at the little girl's insistence and persistence and wondered if she had been like that at three.

Santana was watching the time and motioned to Rachel that they needed to hurry if they were going to get to Mount Sinai for three o'clock.

The pair managed to extricate Quinn from Beth and get her into the car. Now was the awkward part, getting her to the rehab center.

Quinn was safely behind the wheel and looked expectantly at the other two in turn. "Are you going to let me in on the big secret. The pair of you have been giving each other conspiratorial looks all day and worse in the last hour or so." Quinn quirked an eyebrow and Santana could hold firm, but Rachel was hopeless in this situation and couldn't hide anything well.

"We sort of have a surprise for you, but we need to go somewhere to get it," Rachel blurted out much to the disgust of Santana who huffed at Rachel's indiscretion.

"You know, you could play a little hard to get, Berry."

"What sort of surprise?" Quinn wondered what on earth was going on. She had realized something was occuring, but hadn't guessed it was anything too out of the ordinary.

"You have to listen to the explanation when we get there before we show you it. Promise not to ask too many questions beforehand, just trust me?" Rachel was insistent.

"Okay," Quinn agreed. "Where are we going then?"

"Mount Sinai, to see Paula."

"As in my PT, Paula?" Quinn wasn't supposed to ask questions but couldn't stop herself.

"Yes, but that's all I'm telling you for now." Rachel crossed her arms and closed her mouth, refusing to say another word, so Quinn started the car and set off.

The three friends made their way through the long corridor of the hospital to the rehab floor looking for Paula. They had found her office but it was empty and another colleague pointed them in the direction of the gym. Quinn knew her way and led them there. Paula was talking to another staff member just inside the doorway as they arrived. She recognized Rachel, but not Santana so a brief introduction was made and she led them through.

"We haven't told Quinn why she's here yet," Rachel informed Paula, who in turn nodded with a grin.

"Well I guess you had better explain then so we can get on with this."

Quinn waited patiently for Rachel to start. The brunette sat on a padded bench in front of her, took hold of her hands and cleared her throat.

"Remember a while back when we went running with Julia for the first time and I asked you to go but you refused?"

"Yeah," Quinn had a confused look on her face.

"Well we did some thinking and research and asked a lot of questions, which Paula was able to answer and we came up with the idea of getting you something that would allow you to come running with us."

Quinn was stunned and a little speechless. She opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out as her brain tried to rationalize what Rachel had said. Eventually she managed to squeeze out a few words. "What have you done?"

"We thought about a racing wheelchair, but Paula explained that it might not be the best solution for running around the city streets and she suggested a handbike instead."

Quinn was trying to gather her thoughts when Santana added her part in the plot. "I measured up your chair so we got the size right."

"Why have you guys done this? You could have just suggested it and I could have sorted it out myself."

Rachel looked at her shoes briefly. "I wanted to do it for you. I knew you would have loved to go out running with us, well probably not me, I am really slow."

"But these things are really expensive, where did you get the money from. Don't tell me everyone chipped in again, I already feel bad about the dance chair because I don't really get to use it that much."

"No, I got it."

Quinn looked Rachel in the eye and found Rachel's gaze shifted away, allowing the penny to drop. "This came from your compensation money." It wasn't a question. "Rachel, why? That money was for your injuries. I have money for these things."

"I did it because I wanted to give you something back that you lost and I didn't." It was a simple statement and said so much about Rachel's feelings regarding the accident. "I haven't been able to bring myself to spend any of it until recently. I used it for driving lessons because I didn't want you and Santana to have to do all the work on the trip we had planned and then I wanted you to be able to do the things you've been missing and I know you must have been missing running; you and Santana ran miles practicing for cheerleading."

"But I've put that behind me Rach. I don't need to replace everything I lost. I'm not out to be who I was before."

"No but I saw the look on your face as we left and I knew you would have loved it. You wanted to go, didn't you?"

Quinn held her breath momentarily. She had wanted to go and she could admit that now. She had suffered a moment of jealousy but hadn't been honest with them about it until now. "I did."

It was all getting a little heavy and Paula was conscious of the time. "You don't need to miss out anymore. Wait here."

She went to the storeroom, helping to conceal Rachel's gift. What she brought out was a bit confusing at first; it looked like a regular wheelchair, similar to her own apart from having a black frame. "This is only part of it. Transfer in and I'll get the other part."

Quinn was confused but did as she asked and slid across. It seemed like the size was correct and it felt pretty similar to her regular chair as far as she could tell. Paula arrived with an odd looking contraption with a single wheel at one end and sort of pedals at the other.

"This is the crank part and the frame fixes into the tube under the seat." Paula pointed out a metal tube which Quinn hadn't really noticed underneath the seat sling of the chair. It was secured to the rear axle and the frame. "I'm going to let you put it together because its actually pretty easy to do and this type of handbike is easy to transport and breaks down for storage as well. Plus you also have a spare chair if anything happens to your regular one." Paula explained how the frame fed into the tube and a quick rotation of it afterwards clicked it into place. As the frame rotated, the chair tipped back, taking the weight off the regular front castors and onto the larger front wheel of the crank. "You must have ridden a bike in the past."

Quinn nodded.

"Then this should be easy to pick up. You simply use the hand crank to pedal, both hands work together in tandem. The gears work exactly like on a regular bike, you just use the lever on the grips to go up or down. The big cogs are on the left hand and the small ones on the right. You have twenty seven gears, so hills should not be an issue. To turn you simply move either left or right hand forwards and you'll swing in the opposite direction. Ready to give it a go?"

Quinn was still looking a little surprised by the whole turn of events but had a smile on her face as she pushed the hand crank forwards and the bike moved easily. "Keep going," Paula encouraged her, "just don't hit the walls." She continued as Quinn continued slowly around the room. Rachel looked excitedly at Quinn and then turned to Santana and squeezed her arm. "Do you think she likes it?"

San rolled her eyes. Rachel never really changed in moments like this and she saw exactly why Quinn had fallen for her back in school. You just couldn't keep her down. "Of course she likes it. We're talking Q here, if she can compete in it, she likes it!" They waited for the blonde to return seeing her head straight for them. She didn't appear to be slowing any as she aimed herself right at Santana. To her credit, San didn't budge an inch as Quinn brought the bike to a halt right in front of her at the last second with a dopey grin on her face that told everyone she liked it. "Chill out Fabray, you think you can keep up with me in that thing, 'cause I been out with Joolz a lot lately and she thinks I'm pretty quick these days." She put a hand on her hip for emphasis.

"Yeah but unlike you, I now have twenty seven gears!" Quinn's smile was as enigmatic as ever and she held it just long enough to fool Paula but not Santana and they eventually burst into a proper belly laugh. "Rach, thank you so much. I think I might need a little more practice, but I love it."

Paula packed up the bike for them to carry down to the car and gave Quinn a Post-It note with a name and number on it. "This is the number for a former client of mine. Like you he comes in from time to time, usually when he injures himself doing something crazy. Give him a call and he'll give you a hand learning to use the bike. He does marathons and stuff so he can help you more than I can with training. I told him about you and he was keen to help. He lives in Brooklyn so not too far away."

"Thanks, I'll give him a call." The three of them left shortly after with Quinn still a little surprised by Rachel's gift, though knowing her as well as she did now, it wasn't really hard to imagine that she would be so thoughtful.

Arriving back at the apartment, the car was soon unloaded and they went inside talking animatedly. Rachel checked her phone as they opened the door and frowned, the battery had died. She plugged it in for recharging immediately and then went to take a shower. When she came back out, she saw Quinn sat on the sofa reading as usual.

"Check your phone, it's been buzzing for the last ten minutes."

"You could have checked it for me," Rachel replied, still toweling her hair.

"I'm in the middle of a good chapter, sorry." Quinn waved the book at her. "San just left for work, shall we eat in or go out?"

"We had lunch out," Rachel replied, suggesting she thought eating in was better. Checking her phone, she saw a couple of text messages from Kurt to say he would be back the end of the next week and she had three missed calls, all the same local number. She listened to the voicemail and hurried through to where Quinn sat. "Oh my God! Quinn that was the director calling. He asked me to phone back, what do I do?"

"D'uh! Phone him back!" Quinn threw her book down and grabbed her chair. This was it. She virtually tossed herself in, not even bothering to straighten her legs and just stared at Rachel, who with her hands shaking, pressed the call button.

"Hello, this is Rachel Berry returning your call." Pause. "Yes of course, thank you for seeing me again." Pause. "Of course, I actually confess that I heard the two of you discussing those concerns and I fully understand that I am probably too inexperienced for such a big r….." Pause.

Quinn couldn't take it and wanted to just grab the phone, yell at the director for being an ass and tell him to just stop messing Rach around, but she didn't, she stuck her hands under her thighs to stop herself doing anything rash.

"Oh!" Pause. "Y..y..you do?" Pause. "I see," confusion spread across Rachel's face, replaced shortly after by a small grin, which quickly morphed into a big grin, showing all her perfect white teeth.

Quinn mouthed the word 'what?' trying to get at the decision.

"Absolutely," Rachel could no longer hide the emotion and suddenly tears sprang from her eyes, big fat ones that rolled down her cheeks. "I won't let you down. You won't regret this." She looked at the phone for a second and then screamed and jumped up and down like a four-year-old child about to burst with excitement. "I got it!" she yelled at Quinn. "Oh my God, I got it!" Rachel just stared then at Quinn for a second before she just grabbed the blonde up in the air and almost squeezed the life out of her. For her part, Quinn wasn't surprised at Rachel getting the part, more that the petite brunette had the strength to lift her clean out of her chair and hold her up for so long.


	34. Chapter 34

A/N: After a guest reader begged for another chapter, here you are. Thanks again for great reviews and maintaining an interest. Lots of thoughtful questions have been sent too, so i am writing some things in the next few chapters dealing with them.

Enjoy

Disclaimer: i own nothing but an awesome wheelchair (or three) and an active imagination, the rest belongs to Fox

Chapter 34

Rachel spent the next hour phoning and texting everyone to let them know and Quinn just sat and watched her, the excitement was enough to keep her happy-tank full for a long time. Rachel deserved this. Once the calls were made and she had calmed slightly, Quinn pulled her into her lap and played with her hair while Rachel held her phone in her hands, afraid if she let go of the phone it wouldn't be true somehow. Rachel was one of two actresses chosen to play Fanny Bryce, but she felt like she had just won the lottery. She was going to be sharing the role, common practice for big shows so that performers got time off and things like illness didn't get in the way of performances going ahead. She had three evening performances a week and one matinee at the weekend. It was going to be a challenge once they went back to college for her to keep her grades up and perform but she was just so excited it was impossible to contain.

Quinn loved Rachel like this. "Do you remember in junior year when we were supposed to write a song together for regionals?"

Rachel smiled softly at the thought. She giggled and flushed red, shaking her head. "_My Headband _was a disaster."

"Bad, but in a cute way," Quinn chuckled. "I was thinking about the conversation we had on stage at the piano."

"You inspired me to write _Get It Right_," Rachel nodded.

"I just thought about what I said to you. About how our futures would pan out – I would marry Finn and settle down with him in Lima while you would run off heartbroken and the pain would make you even more determined to make it as a huge star in New York. This isn't necessarily what I had in mind at the time for me, but it was exactly what I had in mind for you. This is that moment you have dreamed about since you were tiny. You deserve this so much and I couldn't be happier right now, honestly, I wouldn't change a single thing."

Rachel tossed her phone on the coffee table. "You inspired me that day and then like a hundred other days but I didn't see it. I just thought you wanted Finn and didn't care if you hurt me. Then when we talked about Finn proposing in the girls bathroom at school, you told me even though we made a lovely couple, it was a mistake. I hadn't wanted to listen because I thought you just didn't want me and Finn to be happy, but you were right. You saw me trying to sabotage my own future because really I was still just this immature girl from a small town worried she wasn't going to get to New York. Funny how you have been the one to inspire me so often and I didn't see it at the time. I look back often now and think about all those times you tried to help me understand that my dreams were achievable."

Quinn's face was picture perfect, as always. She didn't speak for a while, just sat toying with Rachel's hair. "I liked your hair longer at the front, when we were sophomores."

"Me too, but the little scar on my forehead shows then and I am vain." She grinned at her self-awareness. "I liked your hair long. Why didn't you grow it out again?"

"I was planning to before the accident but afterwards it took me so long to get ready in the mornings that I just kept getting it cut because it was easier to manage."

"But you're as quick as I am at getting ready now."

Quinn grinned. "That's because you take forever with your endless beauty regimen. I'm still slower than I used to be."

"Well some of us don't have the benefit of your instant beauty and need to work a little harder."

Quinn blushed. "I wish you wouldn't say things like that but thank you. You understand that I think you are gorgeous as well."

"Apart from the nose," Rachel smiled at her own past insecurity about it.

"Including the nose. You wouldn't be you without it and I should never have encouraged you to change it, I don't think I ever apologized to you for that," she leaned and placed a delicate kiss on the end of it which drew a big grin from Rachel.

"You know I feel the same about your chair now. You wouldn't be you without it. Does that freak you out at all?"

Quinn shook her head and smiled. "Not coming from you," Quinn relaxed back into it. "Funny how when you find the right person, the things which make you insecure in the past just don't seem like weaknesses anymore." She watched Rachel nod in agreement. "You really like my hair longer?"

The smile broadened. "You are always pretty, no matter what. The important question is, do you like it longer and can you be bothered with the extra inconvenience? You don't need to change anything about yourself for me."

They never actually got round to eating dinner that night. They enjoyed the bottle of Champagne LeRoy had given Quinn for the occasion, which led to the bedroom not long after and they hadn't emerged until it was much too late to eat anything other than a midnight snack.

Quinn kissed Rachel goodbye for her first rehearsal and collected her belongings. Santana had given her a hand to get the bike in the car and she was off to meet up with Chris, the guy Paula knew, to get some help with using it properly. Santana wanted to go with her, but sometimes Quinn just wanted to do things on her own so she teased her friend about her being too slow to keep up with them and promised as soon as she had learned how to go slower, they could go out for a run together. San had pouted, but it was largely concern that her best friend was about to go and meet some strange guy in a random place he had suggested.

"Relax will you. I don't think Paula would have suggested it if he wasn't trustworthy. I don't need a bodyguard, especially one as skinny as you, even if you are from Lima Heights."

The Latina huffed, still not entirely happy. "Promise you'll keep driving if you don't like the look of him or the place? And you better text to let me know you got there okay and when you're about to leave."

"Yes, Mom!" Quinn teased again.

The gruff response came with a shrug. "I just care about you okay."

Quinn felt a little guilty about making fun of her friend's loyalty for a second. "I'm sorry for teasing," she held her arms out for a hug and felt the slender arms wrap around her shoulders.

"S'okay. Have fun and don't run no one over."

"You realize that's a double negative, so you are actually telling me to run someone over?"

"I might be from Lima Heights, but I'm not a dummy you know," she sported a wicked grin that told Quinn she knew exactly what she was saying.

Chris was a good sport. He wasn't a paraplegic like she had been expecting, rather a double amputee. He had been in the army and lost both his legs above the knee in a roadside bombing in Afghanistan, which made Quinn shudder when he told her and her thoughts went immediately to Finn. She briefly sent a prayer up for him and hoped he would be home safely soon. The former soldier's bike was different to Quinn's. It was single structure, rather than the chair with a bike attachment like hers and much lower to the ground. He explained that he had one like hers originally, but that his was more specialized for racing and while it would go quicker, it wasn't necessarily as practical. He was quickly ready and helped her set up the gears for what he had planned, selecting a relatively easy one to warm up so he could judge her strength. He had glanced at her arms and shoulders, left bare by her training vest and thought she looked pretty athletic anyway, but didn't want to start off too hard.

Quinn seemed to cope easily with controlling the crank and turning, but found she wasn't so intuitive with selecting the gears and sometimes picked the wrong shift. That said they lapped the small park several times before arriving back at the cars almost an hour later. Chris advised her to go and practice over the next couple of weeks so they could meet up again when he got back from his vacation. She thanked him and packed everything in her car before waving him off and sending Santana a quick text message to say she was on her way home. Her shoulders were a little tired but Santana gave them a quick massage for her when she got in so they didn't stiffen up. After a shower and change, Quinn kept her promise to Beth and headed for the daycare in time for the afternoon singing session.

Quinn was impressed by how quickly Beth's talking was improving. She could pronounce sounds which had been impossible just six months earlier and though her sentences weren't always fully formed, she had started asking a lot of questions, mostly starting with her new favorite word; _why_. When she mentioned this to Shelby, she put it down to spending time with a lot of other youngsters in the daycare. There was endless chatter amongst the toddlers.

They had everything from six-month-old babies right up to pre-schoolers and a number of staff to help out. The infants needed a lot of looking after; there weren't that many of them and they had their own area which was always quieter. Most were in the one to four-year-old age group and Quinn enjoyed playing with them the most. Though she liked to spend time with Beth, she didn't spend any more time with her than she did the other children and she was popular with the lady who managed the infants because she was happy to change diapers and feed them. In fact Quinn's being in a wheelchair seemed no disadvantage at all, her lap making a perfect place to entertain the little ones.

It took her a few tries to get the diaper changing down without too much of a fuss last time she had been there to help out. The changing table was too high, so she had put the mat on the floor, slipped out of her chair and done the changing there instead. It wasn't even difficult, just needed a little thought about getting things in the right place first then having someone hand her the infant once she was out of her chair. She had spent an hour doing changes that day, with the staff almost running a conveyer belt system, which they all shared a laugh about when the last one was changed and of course the novelty of having someone else doing it made a mundane task much more entertaining than usual. Quinn had missed out on this with Beth and felt like she was getting a taste of what it was like if nothing else. She enjoyed feeding too. The little ones always seemed content to lie in her lap and suck away at the bottle until the last few bubbles of milk were gone. She loved the smell of babies, they all had that delicious aroma of warm milk about them. The baby puke she could manage without, but it was inevitable. There were always plenty of covers for her shoulder lying around though, so at least her clothes didn't get messed.

She had seen a little uncertainty regarding her abilities to begin with, but she had been careful to make sure she didn't do anything to put them at risk. She let the staff hand her the babies and made sure she kept her back against her chair when she had them on her shoulder. It was the same with the toddlers. She didn't pick any of them up and even Beth now climbed up into her lap rather than have Quinn lift her. She was also careful when moving around, cautious to avoid small fingers getting trapped in the rear wheels because they did tend to stand very close to her a lot of the time, unlike adults who understood to give her a little more room. It was however, the nicest feeling to have four or five small children surround her and talk to her about what they were doing or what she was doing.

Perhaps the most surprising thing of all was their questions about her wheelchair. Beth had never asked her directly and Shelby hadn't mentioned it to her, so she assumed the youngster just didn't think about it as a curiosity, but the other children now felt more comfortable with her; this was her third visit, and had started to ask. It was funny because she always sensed that when she met new adults, the first thing they wanted to know and the last thing they dared to ask was why and it was this that usually prompted Quinn to drop it into conversation to put them out of their misery, but with little kids it was different. They weren't embarrassed to ask, so she wasn't embarrassed to answer.

She had fielded a number of questions that afternoon. A little boy called Jake had asked why she had a wheelchair, he seemed to know what it was.

"Because I can't walk anymore so I need it to move around."

"Why?"

"Why can't I walk?" she checked that was what he meant. There were three other children with her all making pictures with pasta shapes.

He nodded with his big eyes eager to find out.

"I had an accident and afterwards my legs didn't work anymore."

"Does it hurt?" A little girl named Daisy asked this time.

Quinn shook her head and smiled. "No."

"Couldn't your Mommy take you to the doctor?" she asked.

Quinn had to stifle a laugh. "I did see a doctor and I was in the hospital for a long time, but they couldn't fix my legs so I had to have my wheelchair when I came home."

"Do you like having a wheelchair?" Jake asked.

"I like being able to move around everywhere and I like going really fast downhill."

"I think you're really pretty," Daisy announced out of the blue.

"Thank you, Daisy. You are really pretty as well." Daisy gave her a big smile but Jake didn't like the sound of the conversation so much anymore.

"Yuck!"

Quinn reached over and tickled him mercilessly for a minute with Daisy watching on and laughing at him and continuing to stick her pasta shapes down on the pink paper.

Shelby had been watching the whole thing and as Quinn spent a few minutes with Beth, she wandered over to where they were sat in the reading corner. Beth as usual was sprawled across Quinn's lap and engrossed in the story.

"Quinn, why is the catpillar hungry?"

"Cat-er-pillar, can you say it again?"

"Caterpillar," Beth repeated properly.

"Because he needs to eat lots so he grows big and strong," Quinn explained patiently. There seemed to be a question about every single page in the book, thank goodness there weren't that many pages.

"Is that why I have to eat a lot?"

"Yes, you need to get big and strong as well."

Beth's curly head bobbed up and down in agreement. They continued through the book to the last page when the caterpillar becomes a butterfly.

"Why does he turn into a butterfly?"

It was kind of inevitable.

"Because caterpillars always turn into butterflies. The caterpillar is a baby butterfly and they need to eat a lot so their wings can grow, then when they are big enough, their wings are ready to fly."

"Are bees like butterflies?"

"No bees are different." Pre-empting the question to follow, Quinn explained a little more. "Bees are insect that fly as well but they aren't the same kind. Like cats and dogs have got four legs and a tail but they are not the same."

This explanation seemed to go down well and Beth closed the book seemingly finished with her questions for the time being.

Glancing at her watch, Quinn realized it was late afternoon already. Time vanished with the children. "Beth, I am going to go home now okay. I'll come back another day though."

"Will Aunty Tana and Rachel come too?"

"Rachel is very busy practicing for her show right now, but we can go and see it when it opens. If Aunty Tana is not working I will ask her to come. Do I get a kiss bye bye?"

Beth gave her a big cuddle and a sloppy kiss which made her smile. "Bye Quinn," she slid down to the floor.

Shelby chuckled. "She is incessant with the questions. She's driving me crazy."

"It's going to take a while to wear off too. About a year or so I would guess." Quinn replaced the book on the shelf and picked up a couple more that had been left out on the floor.

"You're really good with the kids, really patient and you explain things properly but in a way that they understand."

"I really enjoy coming here. It's okay isn't it? I mean I didn't really ask about parents having an issue. I wondered if some of them might have a problem with me being here. They are paying you after all."

"We are fully staffed and qualified so there is no issue. No one is leaving you unsupervised with all these kids so it's fine. I heard you talking to Daisy and Jake earlier; you handled it really well."

Quinn blushed. "It was fine, they were just curious. I think they sort of understood. I wondered why Beth hasn't asked anything yet."

"I don't think she really sees it the same way they do. She's used to it I suppose. I was going to wait until she asked me to explain, but I might try to talk to her about it now. Do you mind?"

"Why would I?" Quinn had been wondering when Beth would ask her. Maybe it would be easier if Shelby tried to explain it. "You don't have to though, I can talk to her if you feel awkward or you could just leave it until she asks. I really don't mind." She paused for a moment. "I wonder if we told her whether she might treat me differently."

"How do you mean?"

"Just that now she climbs all over me and isn't afraid to do that. I'm just a little worried that she might not want to do that anymore. I don't want her to think of me as fragile, or broken," she chewed her lip as the last word slipped out.

Shelby put a hand on Quinn's shoulder and squeezed it gently. "Honey, I don't think she will because you don't act like that with her. When we came to the apartment that day I remember asking Rachel if it was okay for Beth to stand all over your legs, she was giving you a hug at the time and Rachel just said it was fine. I don't think Beth will even understand properly for a long time, but it might prevent her misunderstanding if we say something now, especially when some of the others have asked."

"Do you mind if I tell her then? I'll do it the next time I come."

"Of course, there's no rush." Shelby seemed hesitant about continuing but she had more to say. She wanted to explain why she had thought about telling Beth. "I was reading something the other day about telling children when they are adopted and it said they don't really understand until they are five or six but that it was good to prepare them by introducing it earlier so it's not a shock. I kept a picture book for Beth so I could explain it better. I think I might start to explain things to her. This is so hard…" Shelby's voice drifted off. "We shouldn't be talking about this here I guess."

"Shelby wait," Quinn stopped the older woman before she could walk off. "It's your decision, not mine, to tell her whatever you think she should know. If it means her opinion of me changes, then I will have to live with that. I don't have any say in this. I gave that right up to you."

"I just wanted to give you an out. If you don't want me to tell her that you gave birth to her, then I won't."

Quinn stared out the window knowing that apart from agreeing to have sex with Puck, this was actually the most difficult decision she had ever been given. Keeping Beth had never really been a choice. If she screwed this one up, who knows what damage it could do. This was where a private adoption fell down; no organization to support or advise everyone involved.

"Part of me wants her to know who I am so that she isn't embarrassed when someone asks or puts two and two together. I keep thinking now that people must suspect something. The other part of me thinks that everything is good right now and I don't want to spoil it." Quinn had become accustomed to voicing her worries to those around her that she trusted. Shelby had made enough of her own mistakes to make Quinn feel assured that she wouldn't be judged over this.

"Things change though, don't they?" Shelby was meaning herself, Quinn, Rachel and Beth; their own weird little family.

Quinn had never really understood what a family was, her own was way too dysfunctional to get it. The closest thing she had ever had to a family had been the Glee club up until now.

"Yeah they do and we survive, right?"

Shelby nodded.

"You can tell her, though maybe it just needs to be one thing at a time. It might be too much to drop everything on her at once. You should talk to Rachel as well, she can probably help you explain it better. I don't know how old she was when her dads told her."

"Rachel's busy," Shelby found it hard to talk to her own daughter sometimes and actually found it easier to talk to Quinn.

"Not too busy for this. It's important for Beth that we get this as right as we can. Why don't you bring Beth over at the weekend? San and I can take her out for ice cream or take her swimming maybe and you can talk to Rachel. It gives you some time to think it over first."

Shelby nodded at the sense of the suggestion. "Let me sleep on it?"

Quinn nodded. There was no panic to do this, they had time to figure it out. Better now that when Beth comes home from school at some point in the future asking for help with her homework about a family tree.

"I better get going," Quinn spun her chair towards the door. "I'll talk to Beth about the other thing tomorrow."

"Bye Quinn, say Hi to Rachel and Santana for me."

Quinn actually held off saying anything to Beth even though she spent another afternoon at the daycare later in the week. Instead she and Santana had agreed to take Beth swimming on Saturday, leaving Shelby and Rachel together to talk.

Quinn thought going swimming was a perfect way to show Beth about her injury without a lengthy explanation the youngster wouldn't fully understand. Shelby loaned them a car seat so Beth could safely be fastened in and they went to a local leisure pool rather than to Columbia where there was no shallow water.

They parked, Santana unloaded Quinn's chair and then let Beth out. She kept a firm hold of Santana's hand until they were inside the building, when she climbed into Quinn's lap. The man on the front desk pointed them to a family changing room, which doubled as the accessible one, killing two birds with one stone. Santana held the door open for Quinn to roll in after her, it was a big heavy door with an auto-closer on it, but it also opened straight out into the pool area so would be easy on the way out. Quinn locked the other side so they could all change. The two adults were already changed under their clothes, so simply had to remove their outer layer and drop things into the bank of lockers. Santana had this done in no time and fished Beth's one-piece out of the bag, predictably it was bright pink. Quinn was still wriggling out of her shorts as Beth pulled off her own top and shorts. She neatly stood into the swimsuit as Santana held it, but she wasn't actually watching because she was carefully eyeing Quinn as the blonde shifted from her chair to a bench so she could take her cushion out and stow it in the locker so it stayed dry.

San pulled up the swimsuit over Beth's shoulders and realizing she was dressed, the excitement kicked in and she jumped about like Rachel did when she couldn't contain her joy. The friends chuckled at the strange little dance Beth was doing.

The Latina and toddler waited, one patiently and the other impatiently, for Quinn to line her chair with a towel and move back into afterwards, then close the locker door and pin the key to the towel.

"Ready to go swimming Baby B?" Quinn grinned at Beth who was jumping up and down all over again. The friends quickly inflated the water wings Shelby had insisted on and put them on each of Beth's arms.

With a busy schedule and being a single parent, Shelby hadn't had much time for taking her daughter to the pool; it was one of those things she had intended to do but hadn't gotten around to much. She had planned on getting Beth a swim teacher but again hadn't gotten around to that either. She was actually grateful that the two athletic teenagers had suggested it. Shelby knew that for all her gruff exterior Santana would make sure Beth was safe and she knew Quinn swam like a fish and would be patient at teaching her what to do.

Santana crouched down beside Beth and held her hand. "So Squirt, you know to hold my hand until we get in right?"

Beth nodded, for once there was no why.

"When we get in, we'll show you how to swim."

Quinn unlocked the door out to the pool and led through. Unlike the university pool where she was well known, she had been here only once before with Rachel and felt instantly more self-conscious. They looked around for the best place for Quinn to get in the trainer pool. It was full of small children and parents on the weekend so Quinn knew she was going to have a pretty big audience.

"Well here goes the fish out of water impression," she mumbled to Santana.

"Do you want me to ask if they have a rubber mat or something?" San knew the drill.

"Nah, I'll just drop onto a towel instead." Quinn picked a spot near the tiled steps which most people used to get in and out. She set the brakes and slipped down to the floor. A lifeguard approached and asked if she wanted to use the lift that was installed at the side of the pool, but it was covered over and looked like it would take a while to sort out. Quinn thanked him, but refused. "It's quicker to do it myself," she explained while avoiding eye contact. She was a little embarrassed even though she had done it a hundred times before because she knew there were at least two dozen pairs of eyes staring at her this time. Straightening out her legs and dropping them over the edge of the pool, she sat and made Beth sit beside her, while San moved her chair back out of the way. It was an easy drop into the pool for the Latina who then held her arms out for Beth to drop into. Beth propelled herself fearlessly into the waiting arms.

Quinn didn't want to drop straight into the shallow water, she was worried about damaging her legs on the hard tile of the pool floor if she did her usual trick. Instead, she inched forwards with her weight on her hands until her legs dropped down into the water. At this point she pushed on one hand and pivoted around so she was facing the edge and then lowered herself slowly down until the water actually took her weight. She felt a slight vibration in her spine from where her knees bumped the edge, but it didn't feel like she connected heavily. Holding onto the side, she could now turn her attention to Beth, who was presently getting splashed and loving it. San dropped her down into the pool and the water wings held her above the water. Beth splashed Santana back now and for a few minutes there was a lot of silliness from the three of them. Beth was loving the water and happily bobbed around, watching around her.

After a while Quinn showed her how to blow bubbles in the water and got Beth to copy her. Beth thought it was very funny and had no idea that Quinn was actually getting her used to putting her face in the water and blowing out rather than breathing in and choking. They showed her how to do doggy paddle after that and then Santana showed her how to put her head in and kick her legs at the same time. Before they realized it everyone's fingers were looking like raisins and Beth was getting tired. The reverse of getting in was going to be interesting and Quinn had to take a deep breath in to steel herself for the myriad of offers to help she predicted would follow.

She bounced her way up the steps and waited for San to bring her chair closer. She dried her hands and fixed the brakes in place and sure enough a couple just about to go in with their child offered to help.

"Can we offer you some help?" the man asked, steering his son, who looked about the same age as Beth out of the way.

Quinn wondered what they thought Santana was doing just watching if she had needed help, but she just shook her head and shoved herself back in.

"Thanks for offering," Quinn replied.

"You made that look easy," he smiled.

"I had plenty of practice," Quinn returned the grin, flicking her brakes off with a flourish and spinning around to leave.

She had no doubt the couple would have a conversation about her as she left with Beth in her lap being wrapped up in a towel as Santana pushed her chair towards the changing room.

As the swimming lesson was underway, Rachel and Shelby sat opposite each other with a box between them on the table. They chatted about incidental matters while they drank coffee, mostly about Rachel's rehearsals and co-stars. Eventually they emptied their cups and the box sat there waiting to be opened.

"This is all the things I had from when I was a baby. My Dads firmly believe in keeping mementos." Rachel opened the box and took a few things from it. "I brought this with me to show you, but I didn't want to force the matter, I wanted to wait until you felt you could talk to me about it."

"Quinn suggested this would be a good idea, but I wasn't so sure I wanted to open this can of worms. I'm sorry that I have found it hard to talk to you about this Rachel."

"Don't apologize about it. I understand more now, since Quinn and I have talked about how hard it was for her. When we first met, I just thought we would have this instant bond and you would be my Mom. I will admit that I was hurt when you were unable to reciprocate." Rachel spoke quite dispassionately about it. "I was just being a typically selfish teenager and thinking about what I wanted rather than about what you wanted."

"I'm still sorry that I wasn't able to make that work better. I wanted so much to meet you and I was desperate to see how like me you were. I knew in my head that you were sixteen, but I just couldn't reconcile the last time I saw you with the young adult you had become. I don't know if it just suddenly made me realize how old I really was, but it scared me."

"I was quite full on and high maintenance at the time as well. Too much teenage angst and no perspective on life." Rachel grinned her perfect smile at the recognition which she found reflected by her mother.

"But you were also me at that age and it was like looking in a mirror. I might not have been able to be the mother you wanted but I was proud of you and I always will be proud to call you my daughter."

"Calling you Mom still doesn't feel right, but it's nice to be able to introduce you to people as my mother."

"I think we have found a comfortable middle ground," Shelby nodded. "Can I ask you some questions about when you were younger?"

"Of course," Rachel wanted to be able to help Shelby deal with the adoption issue and when she was older, she wanted to help Beth too. She wanted to be the big sister she had never had.

"How old were you when your Dads told you about the adoption?"

"I don't really remember exactly, they might be able to help with that. I just remember always knowing and I didn't really care until I became a teenager. I always felt loved and respected by my Dads, but as I got older I wanted to know about you and they couldn't tell me much."

"Did you ask about me a lot?"

"Not to them, just a few times, but I thought about it a lot when I went to junior high and everyone began to realize I had two gay Dads it became something that I was teased about and I suppose I wanted to feel a little more normal at times. Not that I would have it any other way, I love my Dads dearly. It was just a childhood insecurity."

"So you might have been happier if you had found out about me when you were younger?"

"Possibly, but who's to say things don't happen for a reason. Maybe all the tormenting and things has made me a more tolerant and accepting person."

"I'm sorry that you went through that."

"Please stop saying sorry, Shelby. I'm well-adjusted and I might even say popular now. I think I am who I am supposed to be and no one has a perfect life. Look at Quinn. She had the wealthy parents and anyone on the outside would have thought she had the perfect family life, but they were so much more screwed up as a family than mine."

"I just want to make sure Beth doesn't find out by accident that she is adopted and I don't want to wait until she fully understands it. From the research I did, it seems your Dads had the right idea. How did they make it easy for you?"

"I suppose they always made me feel like I had a say in my life. They were incredibly supportive of my choices and they have let me follow my dreams. They always taught me the truth about where babies come from and didn't disguise it, I suppose that's one of the reasons I am so direct at times."

"I want that for Beth. I wouldn't want her to be naïve like Quinn and your honesty, if a little brutal in the past, is one of your most admirable traits, Rachel."

She blushed a little.

"I think it would be good to let Beth know where she came from. I wanted to know that a lot. I would like to have known that I came from your tummy when I was younger. It would have helped me understand better."

"So you think I should tell Beth that Quinn gave birth to her?"

Rachel nodded. "If Quinn agrees obviously. Secrets in families are destructive. I think it will be nice for Beth to have a grandmother in her life too. Everyone needs a grandparent and I know your parents passed away so it might be Beth;s only chance. Noah's parents are not the most stable, Quinn's Dad is a judgmental ass, but Judy has found herself of late and she would love to know Beth more."

"Quinn asked me if they could spend time together this summer. She said she was inviting her to stay with you for a while."

Rachel nodded. "I think Beth is lucky because she has you as her Mommy and you know how Quinn feels so you can explain it to Beth when she is old enough to understand. The fact that Quinn hasn't abandoned her and loves her will make her accept being adopted as a good thing. Noah probably won't be around much, but he loves her too and he will be there if she needs him. She is a lucky little girl. And I finally have a little sister!"

"Do you want Beth to refer to you as her sister? I might have to explain that as well because you use my name when you speak to me, I'm not sure she would understand otherwise."

"I do but I think one thing at a time is the best way forwards."

Shelby nodded. "I think we will start with where she came from so I'm going to make a little scrapbook for her. Will you help with pictures?"

"I'd love to."


	35. Chapter 35

A/N: Thanks for all the great feedback again, especially those of you who keep posting every chapter, I really appreciate it.

Disclaimer: Clearly i wish i owned Glee but I don't

Chapter 35

Santana, Quinn and Beth were sat in the diner where the former worked. Despite a shower after the pool, all three could still smell the chlorine. I should have worn a swimming cap, they're just so damn ugly they would have cramped my style," Santana grumbled. "How do you cope with the smell all the time?"

Quinn grinned. "A swimming cap and a smaller ego."

Santana gave her a dopey grin. "Did you have a good time Squirt?"

Beth nodded and held her spoon up to Santana who was sat next to her. She was kneeling up on the chair and had a ring of chocolate ice cream around her mouth and a light brown streak down the front of her top.

"Shelby's going to kill us if that doesn't wash out. I knew we should have got vanilla."

Santana snorted. "She should have known not to send her out with us in a white T-shirt!"

Quinn giggled. "So do you want to come swimming with us again, Beth?"

Again another nod. Beth was quiet while she was eating but had now finished.

"Do you want some more juice?" Quinn noted the empty glass.

"Yes please," Beth responded with a final lick of her spoon.

Santana made to stand but Quinn dragged her down. "You're not working today," she picked up the glass and moved towards the bar for a refill without bothering the wait staff who had probably had a long shift already. Beth turned and watched Quinn roll away, following her with her eyes.

"Aunty Tana," she spoke as though a question was about to follow.

"Yeah," the Latina responded in the same whiny tone.

"Why does Quinn have to have a wheelchair?" San rolled her eyes and sighed. She wasn't going to field this one.

"Ask Quinn when she comes back with your juice."

Beth shook her head.

"It's okay Beth, she won't be mad or anything."

"Promise?"

"I promise, she was going to tell you about it when you got a bit bigger so you would understand, but I think maybe your big enough now. Do you think you're big enough now?"

She nodded. "I am big, I'm three!" she announced.

San laughed and tickled her mercilessly until Quinn rolled back, waiter in tow, rolling her eyes because he insisted on carrying the drink to the table.

"Her you go, Miss Beth, one apple juice," the waiter announced.

"Say thank you to Brendan, Beth."

"Thank you, Brennan."

"Brendan," San corrected her.

"Brendan," she repeated getting it right.

"You are welcome anytime miss," he grinned and waltzed back over to the bar.

"Beth has a question for you Q, don't you?" she nudged Beth, who was stalling by sucking her juice through a straw seemingly without breathing.

Quinn looked over and wondered what it was but from San's expression it was a tricky one.

Beth placed her drink down with both hands and leaned onto the table with her elbows. "Why do you have to have a wheelchair, Quinn?"

Quinn kind of hoped she might have a little more privacy and she could instigate the question, but she wondered if the trip to the pool might spark it. It was always a risk that Beth would recognize the wheelchair as a curiosity, especially after the way she had been stared at in the pool that morning. She was careful not to sound unhappy about it and stifled her urge to sigh – why did she do that whenever she had to tell someone?

Santana interrupted her chain of thought by adding in the details about their conversation. "I said you were planning to tell her when she was bigger, but she says she _is_ big now she's three! Cheeky monkey."

Quinn laughed which also made Beth provide a cheesy grin. "I have to use my wheelchair because I can't walk anymore," she knew what was coming next.

"Why?"

Quinn smiled. "Because when you were little, I had a bad accident and I hurt my back. Come here and I can show you," she instructed. Beth dropped down from the chair and went around the table to Quinn, who pulled her up onto her lap. "So I hurt my back here," Quinn poked her finger in the small of Beth's back so the youngster could feel it. "And I hurt the nerves that tell my legs what to do, so now my brain can't tell them to move anymore. Do you understand?"

Beth shook her head and looked puzzled.

"Okay so give me a high five," Quinn told her and Beth responded.

"How do you make your hand move?"

Beth thought about it but just shrugged.

Quinn grinned a little, this wasn't as easy as she thought it was going to be. "So your hand moved because your brain decided what it wanted to do and sent a message to your arm and it goes from here," she ran her hand from Beth's head all the way down her neck and then along her arm to her hand, "to here along something called a nerve. Because I hurt my back the nerves to my legs don't work anymore so I can't move them. The message from my brain doesn't get there anymore and the doctors couldn't fix it."

Quinn still wasn't sure Beth understood fully, but she seemed to be thinking about it some more so she just let her process the information. Looking up at Quinn with a curious expression, she asked "Are you sad?"

Quinn shook her head. "Not anymore. Did you ever fall over and bump yourself really bad and cry about it?" Quinn didn't know if Beth could remember splitting her lip when she was younger, but she was sure she would have fallen sometime in living memory.

"I fell offa a swing at the park and bumped my knee," Beth pointed to a little pale patch of skin that looked like it had been skinned not too long ago. "I cried and Mommy bought me a ice cream."

"Were you sad at the time?"

Beth nodded.

"Are you sad about it now?"

She shook her head.

"That's the same with me. I was sad at first and had to stay in the hospital for quite a long time, but then I went home and got better and so I wasn't sad anymore." It was a gross over-simplification but it was enough to keep Beth happy. "Now I'm not sad at all, I just have to have my wheelchair instead of walking everywhere, but that means I get to give you a ride on my knees."

Beth nodded. She was always happy to have a ride.

"You understand my wheelchair isn't something you need to be sad about, don't you?"

She nodded again.

"Good girl," she kissed the curly blonde head. "Go sit next to Aunty Tana and finish your juice."

Santana saw the child drop down to the floor and reached over to Quinn palm up for a high five herself. "My brain just told my hand I should do that," she wore a big grin that showed her dimples.

When they got back to the apartment, Beth dropped down from Santana's back where she had been given a piggyback ride all the way up from the car and ran to Shelby for a hug, excitedly telling her all about the swimming pool. She climbed up onto a chair and assumed her usual position on her knees and leaning forward on her elbows so she could tell Rachel all about it as well.

Santana went into the kitchen and made tea for everyone while Quinn added a few details. When she was done with the swimming story, Quinn spoke to Beth. "Tell Mommy what we talked about in the diner."

Beth thought about it and scrunched up her face. "Not be sad about your wheelchair." It was very matter of fact and unemotional, just what Quinn had been hoping for.

"She asked and I explained. I think it was because people in the pool were kind of staring as I got in and out. It was quite busy. She must have picked up on it."

"Do you understand why Quinn needs a wheelchair, Beth?" Rachel asked her.

Beth nodded. "She had a accident so her brain don't tell her legs to move." She played with a placemat on the table nonchalantly. They all let the grammar slip for once. "But she said don't be sad about it."

"That's right, clever girl. High five me," Quinn held out her hand and Beth stood on the chair to connect their palms together.

"We sorted some things out too. Shelby decided on how to tell you know who about you know what so we're making a scrapbook with photos from when she was born to help. Can we have copies of the ones with you and Noah to put in?"

"Yeah, sure." Quinn seemed to like the sound of it, which made both Rachel and Shelby relieved.

The summer wore on for Rachel and Quinn. They had friends out to visit from time to time, but between Quinn's pursuit of her fitness and Rachel's rehearsals for Funny Girl, they had little time off to go too far away. They drove up to Boston for a weekend trip together and stayed at the Omni Parker House as a treat, which they both loved. They did the Freedom Trail the first day and got to see lots of sights and went to see the Red Sox play at Fenway Park that night before shopping the following day. They started with Quincy Market and ended up on Newberry Street, where Quinn was a little frustrated at the old buildings with several steps up and down and vowed to practice them when she was back in New York so she could manage when there was no other way. That didn't spoil their trip though and both marked it down as a place to visit again in the future, especially after a long walk back along the Charles River before leaving on Sunday evening.

Judy visited as promised and she and Quinn took Beth to the zoo for a day, by the end of which Judy had fallen in love with her granddaughter. Blaine had arrived in the city when Kurt returned and planned to spend the time off getting to know all of his boyfriend's favorite places and with Julia arriving to spend the summer with Santana, there was a crowd in the apartment most of the time.

Quinn actually enjoyed having plenty of people around. Blaine joined the runners and they found a good route with as few crosswalks as possible to make life easier on all of them. Kurt refused to get involved but always had breakfast ready for them when they arrived back and it left the bathroom free for Rachel to spend as much time in there as she wanted without fear of the rest yelling at her.

It also meant that Quinn had lots of engaging conversation around her when she was stuck in the standing frame. That said, she was suffering from fewer spasms in her legs as a result of using it more, despite the reduced medication that had initially caused some issues. And while Santana was admittedly no match for Quinn in the pool, Blaine was pretty quick and seemed happy to go along for the occasional swim, though careful not to spend more time with her than he did with Kurt. Kurt however proved more than useful in helping Quinn keep track of times and compare them to the qualifying times she was after. He happily stood at the side of the pool with a stopwatch, largely because he could admire Blaine in his Speedos it had to be said, but Quinn wasn't averse to a little exploitation. The problem she had now though was how to get classified for competitive swimming against other disabled athletes and she didn't have a clue where to start.

They sat in a café on Broadway just down the street from Dodge Hall and Kurt had his laptop out to take advantage of the free WiFi.

"I'm just emailing your times to you, Quinn."

"Thanks, not sure what I'm going to do with them yet though."

"Are you considering what Sue Sylvester said about the Paralympics? I really think you should do something about it." Blaine was impressed that she could beat him despite having no kick in front crawl and kept pace with him in backstroke.

"I just don't know how to go about it. My coach is just the college coach, she doesn't know much about it. I emailed her though and she said she would look into it for me."

"D'uh, just search online, surely there's something about it on the internet." Kurt looked expectantly at her.

"What?" she gave him a Gallic shrug. "You expect me to know about these things. I've been a paraplegic for eighteen months. I don't know what I'm doing."

"What should we search for?" he asked.

"Try just the Paralympics, surely there's like an official website," Blaine suggested.

"There is I looked," Quinn replied. "It said I had to get classified for competition, but it's a bit confusing."

"What about US Paralympics then?" Kurt opened up a webpage and started tapping out the search into Google.

"Add swimming, each sport is different," Quinn encouraged.

"Here we go," Kurt found what he wanted and showed it to Quinn. She scanned down the page and opened the classification page.

"It looks like I have to fill out some forms then enter an event and get classified by some assessors. Presumably they have people there who can verify my category, then if I'm good enough maybe I can make the national squad. Who would have thought it was straightforward?"

"Where are the events?" Blaine asked.

"I think there's a schedule here," Quinn opened another menu and found a list of events where she could enter. "The first is in Cananda," she said with a hint of surprise. "Edmonton, where even _is_ that? And why is it in Canada?"

"Alberta," Blaine replied. "It's like way over the west, but not as far as Vancouver."

"The next is in January in Minnesota, nothing in the North East let alone New York. Oh well. I guess I better send of the registration papers first."

Kurt had taken the laptop back. "The forms are on the website, you can download them and email them back. It doesn't look too hard. You should totally do this, Quinn."

"Yeah, you really should. You are awesome in the water. I don't even understand how you can beat me without kicking. I tried not kicking for a bit and you left me for dead, I felt like I was going backwards in comparison."

"Now I know why Santana doesn't want to come, she hates losing to you at the best of times," he grinned.

"I didn't really think this was going to go anywhere when I started. It was just supposed to be a way of keeping fit and I admit I like the freedom of moving around easily in the water, but I was surprised to make the college team let alone be thinking about this." She tucked a strand of still wet hair behind her ear. "I just thought about coming to college to try my hand at acting, I wasn't actually thinking about an athletic career."

"Well now it looks like you might be forced to choose, because you are great at both," Kurt shrugged, "and gorgeous. God I really hate people who are talented, good-looking and really nice."

"Really nice? Me?"

"These days, you are. Occasionally I miss bitchy Quinn. She was a force of nature and able to keep Satan in check when she got out of hand, but honestly, I love nice Quinn, she's less drama queen and much more fun."

"Thank you, Kurt. I appreciate you, both of you actually, coming with me. Would you like me to show you around the campus, Blaine while we're here?"

"I'd love to see the theater," he grinned.

"Your wish is my command. Courtesy of my elevator pass, we can pretty much get wherever we want!"

"So you're actually going to do this?" Rachel asked as Quinn sat in front of her laptop later that evening.

Nodding her head in reply, she looked up and met the grinning features of the person she loved. "I think I have to find out if I'm really any good. I might need to up my training sessions, but I don't mind the early starts so much now."

"Do you think you'll have time for this and being a member of two theater groups?" Rachel wondered if the blonde girl might be stretching herself too thin once school started again.

"For now, no. But if I find it's too much, then trailing up to the Bronx every Saturday might not happen once the play we're doing this month is over."

Quinn completed the registration forms and also emailed the headquarters for Paralympic swimming to find out what she needed to do, but also looking for some help and advice. She received a reply pretty quickly with details of how to get classified according to her particular type of disability and a list of coaches who specialized in training disabled swimmers. She would need medical records about her injury to prove she was eligible so she quickly emailed Dr Myers as her specialist to find out if she could prepare the necessary paperwork.

The reply came back three days later.

**_Hi Quinn, _**

**_Lovely to hear from you and exciting news, I am really pleased to see you moving forward in such a positive way. I have had to complete similar documentation before and have instructed my administration assistant to prepare copies of all the X-rays, MRI scans and test results for you. I will attest to the degree of residual impairment from all of those and prepare a report for when the request comes in._**

**_I doubt there will be any need to refer your documents for independent verification as your injury is categorized as a stable ASIA A, which means complete and permanent but even if they do, there will be no need to worry about the process. Your MRI scans in particular show the lesion on your spinal cord very clearly and a recording was made in theater of your surgery which also details this. In short, it should be a simple process. I checked and I think your injury would put you in the S5 /SB4 / SM5 category. _**

**_Good luck with the training and please get in touch if I can be of any further assistance._**

**_Regards_**

**_Angela Myers_**

Quinn looked up the categories and found what she needed. She was actually able to look up all the swimmers who were registered and their classification. There didn't seem to be that many females within that category, which meant she might not have so much opposition to get to a decent level of competition.

The following weekend, Rachel had a little time off from rehearsals and suggested to Quinn that they went for a trip on the Circle Line. Kurt, Blaine, Santana and Julia were all keen to go too. Quinn made a group booking as the forecast was excellent. When Saturday came round, they all took the bus to Times Square first then changed to get one to 12th Ave and Pier 83 where the boat departed. Quinn was slightly put out that she could only access the lower deck, but had prime spot by the large open window to park her chair, so wasn't too disappointed.

It was a hot day and everyone was keen to avoid too many clothes with the exception of Kurt. Santana and Rachel both had hot pants and sun tops on. Quinn had on a vest and shorts, hot pants were just too skimpy for her to brave in the chair, similarly Julia had on shorts and a T-shirt. All the girls had flip flops on their feet except Quinn who opted for sneakers. Her legs were still more prone to spasms since the reduction in her meds and she had been more cautious about protecting her feet since. Blaine as always was dressed in preppy style, with Bermuda shorts, polo shirt and loafers without socks. For once he had let the bow tie go though. Kurt however was as fashion conscious as always and vowed not to reveal more than an ankle in the sun.

They were all in a great mood and put aside thoughts of future plans, hopes and dreams and instead just allowed themselves to live in the moment.

Julia was the only member of the group who hadn't been a McKinley student and as such wanted to know more, particularly about Santana, and asked a whole bunch of questions as they sat in a row and chatted. The boat was getting further from Manhattan and closing on the Statue of Liberty, so with nothing much but water to look at, they turned to each other for entertainment.

"So I heard all these tales from your days in high school from Santana but I don't really know if I believe them or not. I got the impression she was exaggerating and I can never get anything much out of Quinn, so boys, tell all." Julia figured she might have more joy with Blaine and Kurt than the others.

"That depends on what she told you," Blaine was honest as ever.

"Well, she told me that the cheerleading coach was a total bully who ran for congress and it ended up with her being outed on TV by one of the other candidates."

"That's true," Kurt responded.

"And that your Glee teacher persuaded your Dad to run against her and he won." Julia was wide eyed at this.

"Also true," Kurt confirmed.

"I had no idea your Dad was in congress, I thought you said he ran a tire shop."

"He does, but he's also in congress now so he hired a manager."

"And is it true that Rachel and Quinn fought over a boy constantly?"

"My stepbrother actually," Kurt responded.

"My school seems so boring in comparison," Julia shook her head.

"I told you I wasn't making this shit up," Santana replied with a huff.

"Yeah but you do exaggerate," Quinn poked the Latina sat beside her in the ribs.

"So Julia, tell us a bit more about yourself. You said your high school was a little boring, but we don't really know much else about you yet. Come on spill," Blaine hadn't had much chance to find out any details and was keen to know more.

"I'm from Long Island, which is where I went to school and where my parents still live. I guess I had quite a comfortable life but I've always been a little shy so I never really had a big group of friends like all of you. You guys know a lot of people. I have two older brothers. Ben is like ten years my senior and he left for college when I was eight. He's pretty settled with his own family in Rhode Island. My other brother, Philip is five years older than me and he's in the Navy so I don't see him very often, but we're really close and I miss him a lot. He's on an aircraft carrier somewhere in the Middle East."

At the mention of the military, the others all immediately thought of Finn. Kurt had already told them that he was due to return within the next week or so.

Julia continued after a brief pause. "I ran track in high school and that's about it, no show choir, singing and dancing aren't really in my vocabulary, but I really admire you guys. I loved your party Quinn when everyone performed. You are all amazing and I'm really looking forward to your show Rachel."

Rachel leaned over from where she was currently sitting on Quinn's knees, past Santana and squeezed Julia's arm. "Thank you. And you know you actually do have a big circle of friends now, because we are all fiercely loyal to each other so if you are friends with one of us, you are friends with all of us."

The rest agreed and Julia felt several pats on her shoulders and another squeeze of her arm from Rachel. She turned and mouthed a couple of words to Quinn, a silent acknowledgement that she had been responsible for opening up her world. The words were a simple "Thank you."

By the end of the trip they had taken tons of pictures and had a great time seeing some of the best sights in Manhattan.


	36. Chapter 36

Disclaimer: I don't own Glee

Chapter 36

Gearing up for opening night with Rachel was tense. Everyone in the apartment could feel it, mostly because Rachel was constantly vocalizing her concerns about, well, pretty much everything. The other cast members, her make-up and costumes, the musicians, her co-star and most often, the director all provided something for her to worry about. Whilst the rest of them tried their best to keep her on a calm and even keel, it was down to Quinn to keep her head from exploding for the most part.

The official opening was happening in a week, but in the interim, tickets were being sold on the door for a week of preview shows. Rachel had a show every other day and one of the two matinees to worry about and though rehearsals had gone well, she still insisted on going over lines virtually every day. Each of her roommates was intimately familiar with the script by now, but Quinn in particular knew every line.

"If your leading man falls ill, tell the director I'm available as the understudy. Do you think they could advance the story by a century and make it gay?" Quinn grinned and shifted her weight slightly. She was propped up in the standing frame as usual after dinner. They had the apartment to themselves at her request so she could keep Rach from driving everyone else nuts with her fretting.

Rachel looked at her earnestly, perched in Quinn's wheelchair while they rehearsed once more.

"Joke, Rach."

"Sorry, I was thinking it might make for an interesting twist." Rachel's face broke into a shy grin. "I knew you were just joking." She reached out to hold Quinn's hand but felt the blonde pull her up.

"I hate seeing you sat in my chair. Funny but it doesn't bother me when anyone else sits in it, but it reminds me of being in hospital after the crash when I saw you wheel into my room."

"Quinn please. It shouldn't bother you. I'm fine."

"I know, but it still makes me feel sick, thinking of you experiencing that."

Rachel snaked an arm around Quinn and nestled her head into the taller girl's ribs. The blonde reciprocated and Rachel felt herself wrapped in strong arms. "I know you don't exactly like this contraption, but it is nice to see you standing tall. This makes me feel so safe."

"I don't mind it as much now I'm not stuck on my own in my room with nothing to do. There is also the advantage of being able to do this," the blonde lowered her head and kissed the top of Rachel's head. She couldn't twist her torso much because of the pad against her stomach and the straps that held her securely upright.

Rachel took one of Quinn's hands in her own and raised it to her lips. "I love you more than I can say. I'm sorry if I have made everyone a little crazy with my worrying about the show."

Quinn grinned at her. "We all understand how much this means to you and we don't mind if you've been high maintenance this last week or so. Everyone here loves you and knows you well enough by now. I love you more every day. You are like my Oxygen. I wouldn't know how to breathe without you."

Rachel tilted her head and found Quinn's hazel eyes staring straight into her own. She reached up and pulled Quinn's head lower until their lips met. It started slowly at first, just gentle kissing and then suddenly the heat rose. Quinn liked this, being able to stand and kiss her partner even if she couldn't feel anything below her hips, she enjoyed being upright and tall again. Rachel's hands ran up her back beneath her shirt and she felt her bra opening and then the small hands were round the front reaching for Quinn's breasts, teasing the nipples and making her squirm slightly.

Quinn had one arm around Rachel's shoulder, her hand teasing Rachel's hair and keeping the shorter girl pulled in tight so she could reach to kiss her. Her left hand was firmly clamped over the brunette's right, which in turn was kneading her breast; vigorous was the word that sprung into the blonde's agile mind.

They kept up the impromptu make-out session for quite some time. Eventually one of Rachel's hands slid south and over Quinn's hip. She hunted for the hypersensitive line to tease her lover and drive her senseless. It always worked like a dream. She felt a ripple of tension pass through Quinn's abdomen before her hand dipped below the line and the tension disappeared. It still felt good though, for Rachel it didn't make any difference that Quinn couldn't always feel things, she deserved to be treated the same as anyone else. The problem there though was that suddenly there was something in the way, a strap around her hip and the big stupid pad thing that Quinn was shoved up against.

Rachel tore her lips away from Quinn's. "Bedroom, please?" She dropped breathlessly into Quinn's chair and waited for the blonde to descend back to sitting.

"Any chance you can vacate my wheels so I can oblige?"

"I thought I might give you a ride before I give you a ride if you know what I mean," Rachel's face became impish and flirty.

Quinn cocked her head to the side and realized the brunette was serious. "What's come over you?"

"So many jokes, so little time," Rachel said wistfully and then grinned.

Quinn blushed as she recognized her faux pas. "I can't believe you are actually going to do this; I can't believe I'm going to let you." She shrugged and waited for Rachel to move the chair up close to the frame. "This is going … to be … ugly," Quinn's sentence was broken up with the effort of trying to shift her weight over into Rachel's lap, the transfer being higher than she was used to. Quinn wobbled slightly trying to settle herself in the right place. Rachel steadied her hips, pulling the blonde into her ribs and lifted the long legs one at a time and dropped them between her own so she could trap the taller girl in place while they moved to the bedroom. Quinn squealed a little and then giggled as they turned into the doorway a little sharply and she almost fell but propped herself back upright using the doorframe.

"Oops, sorry." Rachel grinned and they both started laughing as Rachel shoved the chair right up to the bed. Quinn didn't attempt a proper transfer from where she was perched knowing she would probably just fall on the floor, so she pushed off Rachel's knees and onto the bed landing on her stomach and her knees buckled beneath her.

"I told you this was a bad idea," she was laughing uncontrollably now, with Rachel doing likewise with the added effect of tears rolling down her cheeks as Quinn's butt was now on show. "If I pull myself up, my pants are going to come down, help me; I can't move for laughing."

Rachel wiped her eyes and stood up to help Quinn who looked close to dropping down to the floor. She lifted the long, slender legs together and to the side, rotating Quinn's hips with the momentum and dropped them somewhat unceremoniously on the bed. Immediately afterwards, she reached the back of Quinn's pants and tried to pull them up a little. "I don't know why I'm pulling them up when I want to pull them down."

Quinn rolled onto her back now that she was safely on the bed. Her ribs were still vibrating up and down with the remnants of her hysteria. "I haven't had that much difficulty getting in bed for more than a year." She wiped the tears from her cheeks and sighed. "That was so funny."

Rachel crawled up the bed and lifted Quinn's top to reveal the soft creamy skin of her abdomen. It took little effort to tug down the pants over the narrow, somewhat bony hips of her lover. The paralyzed limbs lay splayed where they had fallen after Quinn had rolled over, so Rachel dropped back a little and straightened them out so she could remove the pants. She took hold of them at the heel and just pulled them until Quinn's feet popped out of the waistband a moment later. Rachel laughed as she saw the long striped socks.

"What?" Quinn looked up from her prone position.

"Your socks are cute," Rachel pulled them off and threw them on the floor. "Why long socks in the summer?"

"This, coming from the girl who wore white knee-highs for four years of high school?" A blonde eyebrow quirked.

Rachel kept her eyes firmly fixed on the hazel orbs staring at her questioningly and then proceeded to kiss the top of Quinn's left foot, followed by the right, then she trailed kisses all the way up both shins until she reached the knees. There she lifted behind them and parted the legs so they laid on the outside of the thigh. The kisses continued up the inside and then around Quinn's hip until she reached the line. Until then Quinn had just kept her steady gaze on Rachel, neither wanting to break the stare, but as soon as she hit the line, Quinn's voice hitched and she dropped her shoulders back onto the bed. Rachel traced along the line with fingernails which drive her lover insane.

"God, it's like pins and needles times a thousand," the voice coming from Quinn's throat was deeper than usual, more throaty and less nasal. More guttural.

"How do you stand it normally then? You don't react like this when you put your clothes on in the morning or fasten the seatbelt in the car." Rachel's impish smile spread across her features. She knew exactly why; when Quinn was horny, the hypersensitivity went into overdrive.

Quinn swatted at Rachel's shoulder. "You know exactly why and who knew you had an evil alter-ago ten times worse than Snix?" The blonde took hold of Rachel's wrist and dragged her higher until the diminutive brunette was straddling her ribs. "Now how about you disrobe and let me have my revenge for the teasing." Quinn pushed herself as upright as she could and then used one arm to pull Rachel to the side and the other to push herself over with the effect of pinning Rachel to the bed underneath her.

"This is new," Rachel smirked.

"You'd be surprised what I practice in PT, apparently I'm great at rolling over for a paraplegic."

They both burst out into yet another fit of giggles before Quinn, with no small amount of effort pushed herself back so she was kneeling on all fours at first before sliding back onto her haunches, albeit a little awkwardly, she had to occasionally put her hand down to keep her balance. She waved a hand at Rachel's upper body and just said "strip!" with an attitude that reminded Rach of Sophomore Quinn.

Rachel's mouth fell open. "When did you…? I mean … how exactly?" She had never seen Quinn be able to manage to take weight on her legs other than propped up in the frame.

She was met with a cheeky grin. "I told you, I have been practicing. While you have been rehearsing, I have been researching and I tried a few things, plus I see Paula every once in a while and she helped me learn how. Not the most dignified of things I know, but I can manage to crawl pretty comfortably now; I'm still a bit wobbly and probably always will be but it might help in an emergency. She insists I wear knee pads though, so this will have to do for now."

"You are just full of surprises," Rachel started removing her clothes, allowing Quinn to drink in the petite frame and light olive skin.

"How does such a loud singing voice come from a body as tiny as yours?"

A smile crossed Rachel's lips. "I like to think that it's down to healthy lungs and clean living. I have been a vegan for as long as I can remember and I have never smoked anything, I exercise …mmph." Quinn had reached forwards and placed a finger on Rachel's lips.

"Sssh! It was a rhetorical question, besides I know all about your clean living. How about we muddy the waters?"

"I hope you aren't suggest…mmph." Rachel found Quinn's lips on her own this time, the blonde having pushed herself back up onto her knees and then dropping forwards on top of the smaller girl.

An hour later they were both still naked, lying facing each other under the sheet. A faint sheen of sweat crossed Quinn's brow and similar was on Rachel's top lip. Both were calm but still breathing quicker than they were before they started.

"Are you happy?" Rachel asked Quinn. "I mean really happy? Not just pretend happy like you used to be."

"Did you always know me so well? I don't even know when you started to understand me but it feels like it's been forever. Like the minute I joined Glee there you were bugging me about being truthful because you could tell I wasn't being honest most of the time."

Rachel scrunched up her nose and shrugged. "I paid attention to you a lot when we first went to high school. I was jealous of how popular you were and confident when you spoke to everyone. I am amazed that you were just able to do that thing where you just speak and everyone listens. I didn't understand why everyone listened to you, but ignored me."

"You weren't ignored Rachel, that was impossible. I mean you were noticed, just treated badly; it's not the same thing as being ignored." Quinn felt bad for a moment, but then realized she had done everything humanly possible to make up for what she had done to Rachel back in high school. "I think everyone was pretty insecure and you were fairly sure of yourself and your ability."

"I rubbed it in people's noses though, that's why they hated me."

"I guess you did. But that was just because we were kids and like me, you've matured and realized that you don't need to tell everyone how amazing you are, you just open your mouth and sing and we all know it."

"Was it really my voice that made you fall in love with me?"

Quinn giggled. "I'll let you into a secret. You remember when you got into all kinds of hot water singing Push It?"

Rachel nodded, remembering the assembly they had done in second year trying to recruit more members.

"That was why I decided to join. One look at you gyrating on stage and singing with that voice. I had never seen you like that before and it was crazy but God it made me horny, even though I pretended to be horrified."

"You still didn't answer my question," Rachel reminded her.

"You want to know how happy I am? I am ecstatic. I am delirious, I am happier than I have ever been. I can't remember any time in my life when I've been more happy that I am right now."

"Really?"

"I promise you, it's the absolute truth."

"I love you more than anything," Rachel leaned forwards and planted a soft kiss on Quinn's pink lips.

"I love you more than that," the blonde replied with a grin.

Opening night was just hours away. As usual, the apartment had numerous guests, though Judy, Hiram and LeRoy drew the line at sleeping on a pull-out bed and opted for a hotel again. The surprise was Judy's new boyfriend, Scott. Quinn knew her mother was dating someone, but had only seen a photo of the sandy-haired giant. The man stood six-feet-five apparently and had sold Judy the car she had bought for Quinn after the accident. Quinn thought it was cute that her Mom had met a nice guy and was sufficiently free of her father now to date.

Judy had brought him round the day before to meet the girls and spend some time with Quinn in particular. They hadn't seen much of each other over the summer and having been reconciled, the elder Fabray missed her little girl. Scott was introduced to Quinn mid-morning and then they left by cab to take in the sights. Quinn was stunned at just how tall he was, especially in relation to her. She had a crick in her neck just chatting to him. He was however, charming and a total gentleman as far as she and her mother were concerned. There was no denying Judy was a good-looking woman, whose appearance was always immaculate, but Quinn was glad she had met someone who seemed to appreciate her for more than just that.

They visited the Empire State Building, where Quinn reveled in the fact that she didn't have to queue with everyone else for the elevator to the 84th floor. The moment they joined the line snaking around the block, they had been pulled out and taken in the VIP elevator instead. One of the few perks of being in a wheelchair it seems. They then walked up Fifth Avenue to Central Park before meeting Shelby and Beth for lunch. Beth was so excited to see Quinn again that she jumped up and down holding onto Shelby's hand while they crossed the street and she practically jumped in Quinn's lap as she rolled to a stop beside them.

Scott watched both women look on with pride.

"Baby B, do you remember my Mom, Judy, from the party?"

Beth nodded her head and was briefly shy, giving Quinn a hug.

"So I have someone new for you to meet, this is Scott, he's kind of like the BFG," she giggled and Beth looked up at mention of one of her favorite book characters.

Scott looked at Quinn for an explanation. "It's a character in a Roald Dahl book, BFG is the Big Friendly Giant."

His eyes crinkled. "I like it, it beats Lurch."

Beth had no idea and Quinn wasn't sure who that was either, but everyone else laughed.

They went to lunch in the small Italian near the daycare that had become a firm favorite. After lunch, Shelby left Beth with Quinn and went back to work and the three adults took Beth to the playground in Central Park for the rest of the afternoon. A tired little girl was delivered safely back to her Mommy at the daycare late that afternoon and a grateful Shelby thanked Quinn for tiring out Beth, knowing it would be a good night's sleep on the cards.

The three adults trooped back to the apartment a little weary but had no rest when they arrived to a full apartment. Artie had no issue sleeping on the pull-out bed and had arrived by car and with Kitty in tow to boot, very proud of himself for getting them there. Tagging along for the ride was Puck and Mercedes. So in all, the place was wedged for the two days either side of the show. The pre-show party the night before had been loud and long. Rachel had eventually insisted that she needed beauty sleep at three am.

When they woke the next morning, the place looked wrecked, leftover food and drink, dirty dishes and glasses were strewn all over the place alongside pizza boxes and empty bottles. It took the occupants an hour to clear up late morning after a lie in. The distraction had been excellent though and Rachel woke feeling excited but not too concerned about the inaugural show.

Doors opened at six thirty for the seven thirty showing, so the whole group planned on getting cabs early, dropping Rachel off at the theater for her warm up and then going for something to eat before the show. It was mid-afternoon when the buzzer at the door rang and Santana bounced up to answer it. She didn't even peep through the hole, just yanked open the door and immediately swore.

"Holy shit, Finnocence!" She jumped up to hug him and felt a long pair of arms wrap around her narrow frame. As he dropped her, she punched him on the arm and watched his face turn to confusion from the dopey grin it had worn.

"What was that for?"

"For not telling us you were coming, AGAIN!" she yelled.

There was a bit of an outbreak of combined disbelief, hysteria and bedlam for the next ten minutes or so as the rest of the gang greeted their friend.

There were tons of questions, but he waved them aside in favor of a hug from Rachel. "You know I wasn't going to miss this for anything right?"

"I'm so glad you are home safely, we've all been worried about you."

He nodded. "I got everyone's messages and I wanted to let you know when I was coming home, but our original transport plane had a problem so we didn't know when a replacement was coming out for us. I only got back two days ago and had to see my Mom and Burt first. They told me about the debut and I jumped straight on the train here this morning."

"I'm glad you came," Rachel gave him a sweet smile.

"Are you?"

"Yeah," she nodded. "I need to thank you, or rather we both need to thank you." She looked over at Quinn who immediately rolled over grinning to see an even broader Finn looking expectantly at them.

"I know what's been going on, Kurt keeps me informed and I admit I am jealous, but glad that you're both happy."

"Really?" Quinn looked earnest now. "I'd hate for you to hate us after everything we went through together."

"I love you guys," Finn reached down and gave Quinn a bear hug. "And I have some news myself." He turned to all of them. "I got promoted and I'm getting sent for officer training so it looks like I won't be going back to Afghanistan, at least not for a while." Quinn looked up at his bronzed face and was impressed by just how much he had grown up.

They all took taxis to Broadway, had a photo taken outside the theater by some passing Japanese tourists and bid Rachel farewell for a while. They met up with Quinn's parents and both Mr Berrys shortly after and went for dinner. They had a huge table booked in TGI Friday's and sat around catching up on all the gossip.

Scott and Hiram sat opposite each other and chatted about themselves, getting to know one another better. Hiram was keen to get to know the guy because Judy was now family as far as he was concerned.

"So Scott, how do you like New York?"

"It's kinda crazy, but fun. We had a great day yesterday with Quinn and she showed us around like a pro." Scott was a good businessman but not the culture vulture that Hiram clearly was.

"I suspect that despite the attraction of Ohio, New York may have stolen Miss Fabray from us. Our own dear Rachel was lost the moment she set foot in the place." He gestured dramatically and Scott could see where his daughter's mannerisms came from.

"You could well be right. I think a certain blonde toddler could also have something to do with that."

"Ah, the lovely Beth. I take you met her yesterday too?"

"We went to the park with her yesterday afternoon."

"Are you as impressed by Judy's daughter as we are?"

Scott gave him a grin. "It's hard not to be. I was surprised when I finally met her. Judy just worships the girl and I was afraid she might be exaggerating, but just one smile from her and you melt."

"Wait 'til you hear her sing," was all Hiram said.

Truth be told, Hiram had been concerned with what seemed to him like a sudden transition for his daughter from all prior evidence that she was straight, Finn Hudson being prime example of past obsessions, to whatever label you care to choose for her now. He wasn't so sure that Rachel was gay, and wondered if it was just that she and Quinn had been through the trauma of the crash together and bonded as a result. But then he had watched them over the months since, and listened, because Quinn was all Rachel talked about, making a change from the previous sixteen years he had heard her talking mostly about herself. He didn't mind, obviously, that his daughter was gay, because that would have been the very height of hypocrisy, but it also made him think about his influence and if that made her more open to the suggestion. When they had talked about it, Rachel had been somewhat reluctant to get into it with him and just reassured him that she was happy and fulfilled with things as they were, so he had been supportive as always. As for Quinn, for a girl who had given Rachel the most grief in the first few years of high school, she was clearly in love with his daughter. There was no doubting that Rachel was the center of Quinn's universe. When Rachel moved, Quinn's eyes followed her; when she spoke, Quinn turned away from whoever else she was in conversation with.

Of course he was concerned about that too. For all that he admired the girl for what she had endured, some of it her own creation admittedly, and revealed so many of the most admirable human qualities, she had acquired a lifelong disability and that wasn't something he or LeRoy had counted on being part of Rachel's future. Hiram knew he was a frightful snob, and that this thinking was irrational because he had been on the receiving end of enough prejudice himself, but he didn't picture that in their lives. He had dreamed of Rachel's wedding day (not the one with Finn Hudson, that was not a wedding, that was a nightmare) where she would walk down the aisle to meet her fiancé, male or female he was struggling to picture that person, but he was sure that his imagination hadn't pictured Quinn Fabray in her wheelchair. It wasn't that he wanted them to break up, but hadn't done much to the house just in case and he felt guilty that perhaps he should. Maybe Rachel would come home more often if they did something to make the house more accessible for Quinn. Because Quinn was fantastic. She was independent, sensible (go figure after the pregnancy and flip-flopping romances of the past), had a great voice (obviously she wasn't as good as Rachel, but then who was?), in great shape physically and financially secure. Mostly though, she made Rachel happy. What more could a father want for his daughter? He was going to have that conversation with LeRoy about the ground floor and if they could get a guest room in there somewhere because an elevator was probably stretching things.

They sat in the row at the back of the stalls where the handicap accessible spaces were. Quinn was nervous for Rachel. She kept looking around at the expectant audience, none of whom knew they were about to witness the birth of a star, but the blonde knew it. She knew that no matter what Rachel thought, their lives were probably going to change after this and she needed to be ready for it. She knew there would be media attention, she knew Rachel would be recording music soon enough and who knew where any of this might lead. She knew their relationship might cause a stir, especially given her condition. But she had lived through worse and sacrificed more so they would get through it.

The group were joined by Shelby and Beth and they all waited impatiently for the curtains to open and the show to begin. There was a lot of chatter and anticipation in the auditorium before music started. Then the curtains opened and Rachel Barbra Berry stepped onto the stage to fulfill her destiny.

**So there you have it folks, the end of the beginning if that makes sense. I wanted to write the first year in college for the former Glee clubbers and this is where i got to. I will carry the story on, but wondered what you thought so far (those of you who have got this far - over 150,000 words and counting.) **

**I guess I will concentrate on second year from now on and am eagerly awaiting the re-start of season 5 so I can keep pace with that. I know I have deviated from the show but I keep weaving bits in from time to time. Thanks to those who have followed the story so far. I am continuing because of the support and enthusiasm (and admittedly because I like writing too!)**

**Please feel free to leave feedback, good and bad, plus any ideas. I have already used quite a few in the later chapters. **

**I wish I could keep up the pace of my first thirty chapters, but as i had already pre-written a lot before I started to post it here, I am now only a chapter ahead so one a week is probably about all I can deliver. Thanks for the support.**


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